your worse or humiliating experience when fat?
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Too many, unfortunately.
A couple of years ago, I was with my extended family & family friends on a vacation in California. We were at a theme park and I couldn't get the safety bar clamped b/c of my size. (Thankfully my uncle stepped in to help and I was able to ride. It was embarrassing enough, I can only imagine what it would have been like if I had to leave the ride.)
I remember working retail as a teen, and having to buy our brand's clothing from the men's section because I didn't fit anything in the women's section.
More recently working in an office that provided uniform shirts, and not having one big enough to fit me -- but having to wear one anyway. Too tight & made me feel so uncomfortable, I'd wear a jacket even though I was melting to hide.
Hearing people make comments. Having a stranger call me a fat cow, or even my own family making snide comments.
Going shopping with girlfriends, and having to answer questions like "You didn't find anything?" or "You aren't getting anything?" with "There are so many cute things, I just don't fit anything in this store" (or this entire mall).
Anything related to going to the beach.
When I'm actually trying to eat healthy & workout, people asking "What are you even doing that for?".
Getting a size 3X shirt as a gift and it not being anywhere near enough to fit.
Seeing that contestants on The Biggest Loser are smaller than I am.
Finding out that I am 0.02 points away from morbidly obese on the BMI -- during my first and already semi-awkward visit with a new doctor. It's obviously no secret that I'm overweight, but to have it quantified & classified in that way was so mortifying. I have never cried so much in my life.
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WOW. I didn't realize I was holding on to so many of those experiences. I don't have anyone IRL that I can talk to about being overweight in this way. Thanks to the OP for asking this question.0 -
A little girl whose mum was pregnant asking me if I was having a baby.0
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I find everything embarrassing whilst being overweight. I hate the way I look full stop. So if I go out anywhere at all I keep my coat on and it doesn't show my rolls!
Also every time I visit my grandad he ALWAYS asks "So, when's the baby due?" and I chuckle but it makes me feel like crap. He's 83 though so I can forgive him for being insensitive!0 -
Wow, everyone here has had a really ****ty experience! It is unbelievable that people are so rude! We'll show them all in the end! x0
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Glad I'm not the only one who got mistaken for being pregnant when in fact I was just fat!!
I was at a party with my partner (it was his friends) and a heavily pregnant woman was there. I was drinking wine and obviously wouldn't if I was expecting and I was stood in a Q for the toilet. The lady behind me said 'i always get stuck behind the pregnant ones!' She was crossing her legs and jiggling about (she was that desperate). I just said I'm not pregnant and her face was a picture! She just kept saying 'are you sure?!' Yes I'm sure!! Anyway, I let her go to the toilet before me and I ended up having a cry in the toilet and not coming down for half an hour, and my partner didn't miss me as he was so drunk at the time.
After that I was so devistated that I just wanted to go home.0 -
When I started this weight loss period, a friend and I were talking and I was explaining to her my plans and goals and I told her that I intended to get down to 175, her reply was yeah and when you get there you might want to continue going! This hurt so much and till this day still hurts. I told was telling her that I wanted to be healthier, active and realistic, this was also the goal that my doctor suggested.
I guess she sort of won because my goal is now 150.
I struggle with this some, too. I've been 307 at my heaviest and started MFP at 262. I'm now 198 and would definitely like to get to 180. I am 5'8" and 37 yrs old, but have not been at 180 since I was 14 years old (actually maybe 13 years old)...so I know that's a pretty awesome goal and accomplishment I am just 18 lb away from. YES I will probably go lower in the future with my new lifestyle. But I don't feel that I MUST go lower. I am actually very happy with my current size 16 self.
However I get private messages sometimes on here about how 180 is obese (actually not, it's just overweight) and I should aim for 130 or 140 or some other number that a stranger has selected. Rude.
I also cringe when people say to me "keep at it" or "good job, keep it up" and stuff like that. Maybe I'm just stubborn. I know I have more weight to lose! But I feel like they're saying, "You have lost weight but you still need to lose x number of pounds to be normal"0 -
When my ex husband kept making fun of me saying I had "Dunlop Disease".0
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This was back when I was in eighth grade and weighed 165 pounds. Two girls threw a ball at my butt when I bent over, and then laughed about it. I've never weighed that much since
Also, throughout my childhood, my nickname from my family was "gorda," which some of you may know translates to calling me "fat girl" or "fatty" or something to that effect.0 -
I went on a two week business trip that I had to do twice a year. I packed 5 suits. When Monday morning came and I went to get dressed, not a single suit fit me. I was horrified. I couldn't believe that I was so stupid to not try anything on ahead of time. I had no idea I had gained so much weight.
I didn't have any choice but to wear my too-small suits - with the skirts unzipped. I had to go on an immediate severe diet, which wasn't fun with two weeks filled with restaurants, buffets and parties.0 -
I have never been mistaken for pregnant, fortunately. I think that one would be the most damaging, probably, because I very much *want* to BE pregnant (haven't started trying with SO yet), but we are waiting for things to get in line with our life financially before we start.
I haven't had any run ins recently - but I have always been thick all the way through, big everything.
I was once rifling through a sales rack at a department store when an elderly man WENT OUT OF HIS WAY, came through the women's clothing section to tap me on the shoulder and say "oh honey, you know none of that is going to fit you so why even bother?". I was so shocked, I didn't say anything - my mom was with me and chased him down and told him he was rude and it was unacceptable. Apparently he was pretty submissive when someone was giving him back for it.
The second incident happened when I was visiting a friend in London. We went night clubbing and as we walked down the street past some people on a stoop smoking, one of them said "hey biggie" and reached out and touched me on my bare arm with their lit cigarette.
I don't think I even realized the whole thing happened until later (pre drinking!)... I have not had a lot of people say or do things to me because of my size, so when it does happen, I find it really surreal and have a hard time reacting. I was also a much different person then than I am now, so I feel like if these things happened again, I would have a lot more to say.
I think it is REALLY important that we give a**wipes some pushback when they say and do awful things to people. The world will never change regardless. We have the right in whatever size body we carry to walk down the street without fear of someone assaulting us verbally or physically. It's a basic human right, whether you weigh 100lbs or 10000lbs.0 -
Oh and I forgot to mention, actually, the one that sticks with me THE MOST... when I was in elementary school I went to a party at a friend's house. They had one of those porch swings and one of the springs had fallen off on one side and they had jerry-rigged it with nylon rope. Five or six kids piled on and because I was the last one to sit on it (overloaded anyways!), when it broke, it was my fault because I was fat.
Funny thing is that NONE of these experiences were key motivators in losing weight.0 -
When I was in elementary school, i went into class late and as I went down to sit in my seat, the legs just buckled and it fell, leaving me to fall flat on my butt. Everyone laughed at me and called me a pig. Now that I am older, my friend told me that him and a couple of guys had gone early to class just to loosen the legs of my chair so that when I sat on it the chair would break. Now I and everyone else always thought I had busted it because I was a fat kid, turns out they were just *kitten*. If I had known he had done that when we we kids I don't know if we would have still become friends in the future!0
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I was at a friend's birthday party which was dress as a movie character themed. Me, having no imagination, ordered a Dorothy dress off eBay but unfortunately, it didn't arrive on time. I ended up going the easy way and dressing as Juno in her poster clothes, orange striped shirt, black jacket/jumper, jeans with a skirt over the top and sneakers with my hair in a ponytail (which I hate doing)
Anyway, me and my BF (dressed as Marty McFly) showed up and our friend greeted us at the door, drunk, and asked who we were. BF says Marty McFly, I say Juno but without the pregnant part. The friend says, "Ah, that's okay. You're fat enough anyway."
Didn't really think other people saw me that way after that. BF kinda got annoyed when I was upset afterwards and I was in a mood the rest of the night.0 -
I never was really that overweight, but just chubby. I've always had a pear shape too, so whenever I lose weight my top half gets really thin but the bottom half just stays the same. Anyway, when I was little my brother used to call me "thunder thighs" all the time or "carrot legs" (meaning my legs were super big at the top and then got smaller). I actually developed an ED and soon had him calling me "bones" or "we might as well feed you to the dogs". Thinking back, it's so sad to see how bullying can affect young kids so easily. I was in sixth grade and remember looking at myself in the mirror and crying. One time I broke out in tears when I ate a tootsie roll on Halloween in 7th grade. Just recently have I started recovering, and have learned that being healthy is the way to go. I'm at a good weight now and am feeling a lot happier.0
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being told in high school by then-friends that i should have been grateful someone found me attractive enough to rape at a house party.0
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being told in high school by then-friends that i should have been grateful someone found me attractive enough to rape at a house party.
Jesus Christ. I am so very sorry.0 -
Someone I hadn't seen for a long time once said to me, "Holy *kitten*!! What happened to you?! You used to be hot."0
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being told in high school by then-friends that i should have been grateful someone found me attractive enough to rape at a house party.
:sad: :sad: :sad:
People suck.0 -
as a fat person what has been your worse or humiliating experience with other people?
sex family get together or with strangers
WTF is a "sex family get together?"
do you comma?0 -
People can be mean!
I was at my heaviest as a teen, so I got the worst comments from mean kids.
The worst was when the mean boys would say "Here comes the Little Teapot, short and stout!". (I'm 4'10"). Not nice at all.
That was years ago though.0 -
1. Walking into any store (Other than Casual Male Big & Tall) and not being able to buy a shirt/pant.
2. Not knowing what I weighed (thought I was around 350) and was asked to step on scale at work for Dumpsters. Came up 415 pounds. Co-worker laughed, I laughed too, but It was an embarrassing type of laugh.0 -
I don't remember how old I was, but I remember being at the pool with my little sister, and there were 2 girls there. One I had a crush on but the other had a horrible attitude and I didn't care for her too much.
Well the not-so-nice girl decided to befriend my little sister and I remember walking out of the pool with my sister when this girl and her friends walked over and told my sister how pretty she was how lucky, etc etc.
The girl then turned and looked at me and told me how fat and ugly I was and how she couldn't believe I was related to my sister on account of how ugly I was.
Her friend stood there and said nothing, just let it happen.
Not sure what I expected of the situation, but I remember walking away trying to pretend it didn't bother me, but it cut a pretty deep wound on my confidence.0 -
being told in high school by then-friends that i should have been grateful someone found me attractive enough to rape at a house party.
Unreal.
I'm so sorry. 0 -
being told in high school by then-friends that i should have been grateful someone found me attractive enough to rape at a house party.
JESUS. I'm sorry that people dismissed your experience in such an awful, cold way. Horrific attitude...0 -
Sigh....since I became fat at 12, I have YEARS worth of noteworthy embarrassing crap...
As an adult, I broke my own living room chair at a Christmas table full of people,
having to squeeze my wide fat *kitten* into chairs I had no other choice but to sit & look awful in,
having a surgeon ask my newly-wed husband how & why I got so FAT (my spouse has never been the same due to the embarrassing humiliation),
showing a co-worker a 1990 photo of my late twin sister (she had recently died) & I, and having to endure the shock & rage when she said: "what happened, why did you let yourself get so fat?"
having men in parking lots, or stores stare at me, or say "hey big Momma.." or "you really got back!"
As a new Mother pushing a stroller, in a cute summer dress (I WAS feeling good wearing) I suffered a up-under-the-skirt grab *kitten* & run...
#1 LIFETIME hate on the list: but...you have such a pretty face....
As a teen: all the jokes & teasing about my bubble butt & thunder thighs... and all the pokes/ pinching & runs...0 -
Being congratulated for being pregnant.0
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Long story short, a guy was hitting on me at the market and asked me for my phone number. I declined, nicely. He too was nice about it. But then, he asked me if I was pregnant. Even if I WERE pregnant WHY would you even hit on a pregnant woman! :sad:
If you can't tell, my stomach is my problem area. I am so happy it's disappearing!0 -
when my almost ex-husband told me that I don`t look like a women0
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being told in high school by then-friends that i should have been grateful someone found me attractive enough to rape at a house party.
I read this and was not even surprised...fat women are just treated like ultimate worthless **** & what you experienced is a big glaring example of how disgusting people/society is. A fat women needs to feel lucky and privileged that someone felt her attractive enough to rape :noway: :noway: :grumble: :explode: :explode: :sad: :sad:
I do not know why this does not anger more people I really dont . I am so sorry this happened to you how horrific0 -
I'm totally astounded. Either I hang out with nicer people or I'm too thick to notice people saying / doing nasty things.
I've been (at least) obese all my life and I've never had anyone ask if I was pregnant; I've never had anyone call me a nasty name to my face (or in my hearing); my girls call me beautiful and have never commented on my weight. I've never had anyone criticise or comment on what I'm eating for lunch ... and the only time I had to ask for a seat belt extension on a flight the flight attendant was super nice - and as it turned out I didn't need it anyway as she offered me a row to myself, if i would like it and the seat belt there was bit enough to fit comfortably.
The only time I can recall anyone saying anything 'mean' was in a plus-sized clothing store when I was trying on a skirt and the shop assistant said - "that's not going to hang right because your butt sticks out" ... and she was right.0
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