The meanest thing just happened :-(

I bet he was "negging" you

totally agree.

You are beautiful, don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

Wow. I have heard/read that such types of insults are a guy's mentod of getting a girl's attention in trying to hook up. Like lower self esteem = higher chance of success for a dbag like that. I think there's even a word for it. You are beautiful and reading this breaks my heart. I hope the 9 pages of comments already here help drill that home. You. Are. Beautiful!

#1 that person was mean and a total idiot.

#2 I have some theories as to why the person said that.
*Jealousy? (is he really unhealthy?)
*Trying to pick you up by insulting you? Some people like to insult flirt? Personally I've never slept with any of them
*Surprise you look so awesome and flabbergasted as to what to say?

My guess is it's that last one... don't pay attention to anyone who is such a glaring ignoramus.

Yeah, he was negging you, trying to pick you up. You're young, you're beautiful, and you have a sweet smile, so you look both desirable and vulnerable. He was trying to take advantage of how vulnerable he thought you were.

I am so proud of you for walking away and breaking down in the locker-room rather than in front of him. What he did hurts like hell but you didn't let him get any benefit from it -- not even the twisted benefit of "Hey, look, she takes me seriously enough to cry about what I said!" You just left. GOOD FOR YOU.

:hugsandcauliflowerforyou:

Some dingbats find the worst methods to come onto a lady. I had something similar happen last year, the guy I was out to dinner with was a personal trainer and after complimenting how hard I'd been working in the gym, paused and recanted, saying I could afford to drop some weight. I'm 105lbs so... :indifferent: Fortunately I'd driven us there. I'd like to think he had a nice walk back to campus

You're bootiful OP, don't let it get to you :flowerforyou:

I'm going to jump in with my third reply to this thread.

I'm working to stop this nonsense. I've been against it for a few years now. Every time a guy negs a girl, it reflects poorly on men in general. Negging is NOT flirting. It's NOT healthy teasing. There's a huge difference! It's not natural or a sign of masculinity or high self esteem behavior either.

You know what the whole basis of this nonesense is? I'll tell you...

The guys who do it and teach it actually believe that men are repressed and have nothing better to do than seek approval from hot women. They think women view themselves as far superior to men. They think that if a guy were to hit on a girl in a normal way, she would see him as an underling who she was doing a favor to just by giving him the time of day...and maybe pity him.

They say that by negging a girl, you're holding onto more of your power rather than giving it away, that you're showing value, and that you're making the girl work for your approval, and making the interaction fun and mysterious for her. I'm not making this up...this is what the "pickup artists" teach, dumbasses that they are! They also think that the hotter a girl is, the more severely she has to be negged.

It's really awful. The guys also don't realize that the very fact that they're so obsessed with pickup games and negging...means their life revolves around what women think of them...even though they claim the opposite is true. And that's not healthy.

When I was in collelge, I actually tried "negging" out a few times. I hated the way it made me and other people feel, hated the reactions and how people saw me after, etc. There was a lot of upset.

I'm trying to shatter the stereotype that guys have to be mean jerks as society tells us.

Please...help me to stop it!

What can we do? We can simply call people out on their behavior when we see it happening in real life. I know I do, but I'm only one person. We need an army in order to put an end to it. Please do your part. Thanks!

I've learned to be ruthless in such situations. I call people out on it. I sit them down...and I talk to them. I explain everything. I tell them why their viewpoint is wrong as far as I'm concerned, etc. So in the case above I'd be explainining to them about quick fixes versus a healthy lifestyle...surgical complications, satisfaction, long-term success rates, etc. Basically I'll grill them if I get the chance. Not emotionally...just in a way that makes them learn something. Sometimes you can actually convert/persuade people to appreciate your viewpoint, when they realize your way is healthier than their way. usually the reason people say negative things, is...wait for it...

...ignorance! they simply haven't discovered a better way! I only spend my time doing that if I think I can really get through to the individual and help set in motion a positive change or paradigm shift in them. If they're totally closed off, it's not worth it. Just leave. But if they have just a slight bit of open-mindedness, you can make a positive difference in their life.

Surely he was kidding!!! You look great how stupid!

That's pretty sad that he is such an idiot !! I'm a bit older than you and unfortunately I have come across many similar idiots over the years and what's even worse, you are unfortunately going to come across more like him as time goes on.. Know yourself, be proud of who you are and what you are accomplishing. Unfortunately Immature people like him, are just part of this world and something that you must not only prepare for, but learn to not let it bother you !! As so many have mentioned, you are a beautiful young lady who has nothing at all to be ashamed of, so continue with your work outs and your healthy living and the next time an idiot says something stupid just smile and go on your way !!