Why did you dump the person above you?
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Always on the road.
wouldnt show me her tattoos0 -
He kept leering at other guys right in front of me.0
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he eats popcorn in bed0
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She didn't get why I always sleep on the left side of the bed0
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He wanted children and I didn't0
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She was jealous of the friend in my profile pic0
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too obsessed wwith car0
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kept photographing himself in bathroom0
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We couldn't agree on who was the better Spongebob sidekick... Patrick or Squidward?0
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She made me feel fat0
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He was the selfie king. I got tired of wearing my "I'm with the Selfie King" tshirt... It started to smell0
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She made me laugh so hard I peed my pants.... then made fun of me for it0
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Her Siamese twin hated me0
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The salon staff was on a first name basis with him... He spent more time grooming his manscape and not enough time exploring my landscape if ya know what I mean0
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Her landscape needed much landscaping to be done0
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He gave me exLax and told me it was chocolate!0
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She didn't like the gifts I gave her0
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He kept trying to put a diaper on me... "Not for another 50 years," I told him but he just wouldn't listen. He said he had "mad diaper skills" and didn't want to get rusty.0
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She kept flashing the neighbors and not show me...0
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He insisted we go to the strip club for our anniversary. I told him I had 2 days left of vacation!0
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Her back looked better than mine!0
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Her smile was brighter than mine!0
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Refused to jam out to Queen or Rush. Had to go!0
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I wouldn't...I Queen and Rush. We'd push each other to workout.0
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I wouldn't dump you either, after your confession to loving Rush and Queen. Did we just become best friends?!0
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refused to strut in heels0
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Didn't acknowledge my closet full of stilettos and heels.0
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Refused to strut nude in the heels that I selected from her collection0
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Walked out of the room before I had the chance to play Adam and Eve in my heels.0
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refused to be blindfolded while being nude and in heels0
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