Why does everyone hate me? The forum Survival Guide.

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Replies

  • OkamiLavande
    OkamiLavande Posts: 336 Member
    This made my day. I've learned so much more from just sneaky stalkering around here than asking questions and it's helped me help others I think. Plus! A lot of questions I've had have been answered. I learned I can't expect the weight to fall off easily when I'm already in a healthy range and a pear shaped gal who's fat wants to cling to every inch of her lower body. I can't change that shape but I can change my fat composition which no pill can do. I've learned I can eat all the foods I love and still lose weight. Who can give up cheeseburgers and french fries, seriously? I've learned so much from silly topics that helped change the way I think of my body that it's improved my self view not just my overall health.

    The forum is a battle ground, you just can't be wearing cloth armor and expect your feelings to not get hurt because people disagree with fact.
  • nikkihk
    nikkihk Posts: 487 Member
    TL;DR: other n00bs:....etc etc...

    Did you just TL:DR and follow with an equally lengthy TL post (which I in turn DR)... the humanity!!!

    =D
  • Collier78
    Collier78 Posts: 811 Member
    So Totally IN! Everyone should have to read this!
  • tennisdude2004
    tennisdude2004 Posts: 5,609 Member

    I think you should go a step further, and get technical support to ban all newbies from posting.

    In answer to your questions and or comments:

    1. Butthurt : informal adjective describing anger or prejudice in response to opinion or statements.. aka. over reacting. It is NOT "name calling" nor does it refer to "disagreeing". To name call requires you are given a derogatory title, (to play the devil's advocate I'll present to you the widely used term.."special snowflake". Butthurt is a state of being like angry or upset, which you may just be based on your responses. But I will not assume.

    2. The guide I provided is not only helpful (I've had several new folks privately message me who both enjoyed the humor and felt far more confident to post now) but if you would take a moment to read it without this pent up bias you seem to harbor? You'd find that I'm really out there to help people AVOID exactly what you are digging yourself into right now. Negativity. A few guidelines in a foreign ecosystem will help people understand an intimidating environment and hopefully help them avoid a crushing Topic situation.

    I'm sorry I didn't deliver it with flowers and a get well card, but like many people on here I don't feel compelled to be warm and fuzzy with a group of people I don't know, and it's in my nature to be bluntly honest or deliver messages with humor. And truth is no one here is going to change how they reside on the threads so as a preventative measure I don't think there is anything wrong with giving new blood a road map to avoid the pot holes. Stop treating this as an attack on newbies, and you might see how it will help them instead.

    Not to be over critical but your 'guide lines' are DERP!!!!!!

    All they are is an excuse to be insensitive to other people, please everyone be honest - a get out of jail free card for just saying what you want, without having to think how your message will be taken.

    Please don't make this issue about the newbie being in the wrong.

    That's the beauty of the internet, we are all anonymous and half of us don't really give a cr*p how we make other people feel.

    These forums are just a vessel for forth right people to get their opinions across (no hypocrisy, I'm just as bad).

    I must say it is really funny to see everyone who thinks this way, jump on the band wagon, as if justifying being insensitive to people is okay - it's not my fault if I say something blunt and they get upset - it's the fault of the person reading it.

    e.g. Newbie - Hi I'm new don't know much about dieting, heard about some pills and have been taking them for about a week. Not sure if I'm doing the right thing - some help please.

    response (made up member mci) - 'Only an idiot would take those pills........'

    Newbie = upset
    Member = not my fault I didn't call HER/HIM an idiot, I just said only an idiot would take those pills - what did I do wrong.

    It happens - it's like being back at school.

    Too be fair that's what I love about these forums!!!!

    So carry on!

    P.S. OP your reaction to criticism is classic - maybe you should reread your thread. lol
  • Ha! Fantastic!
  • nomeejerome
    nomeejerome Posts: 2,616 Member
    .
  • AntWrig
    AntWrig Posts: 2,273 Member
    This is exactly why I rarely post or even read the forums. Reminds me of damn highschool.
  • srr728
    srr728 Posts: 549 Member
    just here for the BUTTHURT

    im a BH groupie
  • MB2MN
    MB2MN Posts: 334 Member
    Awesome! I don't know how you get things made "sticky", but this one should be...needs a little grammar and spelling editing though. Don't take offense, just trying to help! :wink: :flowerforyou:

    Looks at the clock.... Girl, it was like 4:30 am when I wrote that, which is roughly half past the loss of the English vernacular and 4 hours away from a the now 26 hour involuntary insomniac video editing marathon I'm currently experiencing. Grammar or spelling is the LAST thing I'm thinking about right now. You're lucky I could see the screen well enough to press "Post Topic". ;D

    Oh, I get it. I am not immune to spelling and grammar mistakes, far from it. Just saying it needs to be cleaned up a bit before become a sticky, especially since a lot of people get called out on their posts for similar mistakes.

    Calling out spelling/grammar mistakes is actually against the Community Guidelines.

    Just putting that out there.

    Huh, I didn't know that. You see quite a bit of it on the boards, especially put in less-than-kind terms. Sorry, no offense meant, just think its important in getting one's point across in a post that is intended for a large audience.

    its should be 'it's'...just sayin'

    As I said, I'm not immune to grammar/spelling mistakes either...and this is an example of what I mean by "less-than-kind" terms.
  • TL;DR: other n00bs:....etc etc...

    Did you just TL:DR and follow with an equally lengthy TL post (which I in turn DR)... the humanity!!!

    =D

    *eats popcorn, laughs, retires comments for following duration of thread to just ENJOY*
  • MB2MN
    MB2MN Posts: 334 Member
    Awesome! I don't know how you get things made "sticky", but this one should be...needs a little grammar and spelling editing though. Don't take offense, just trying to help! :wink: :flowerforyou:

    Looks at the clock.... Girl, it was like 4:30 am when I wrote that, which is roughly half past the loss of the English vernacular and 4 hours away from a the now 26 hour involuntary insomniac video editing marathon I'm currently experiencing. Grammar or spelling is the LAST thing I'm thinking about right now. You're lucky I could see the screen well enough to press "Post Topic". ;D

    Oh, I get it. I am not immune to spelling and grammar mistakes, far from it. Just saying it needs to be cleaned up a bit before become a sticky, especially since a lot of people get called out on their posts for similar mistakes.

    Calling out spelling/grammar mistakes is actually against the Community Guidelines.

    Just putting that out there.

    Huh, I didn't know that. You see quite a bit of it on the boards, especially put in less-than-kind terms. Sorry, no offense meant, just think its important in getting one's point across in a post that is intended for a large audience.

    its should be 'it's'...just sayin'

    As I said, I'm not immune to grammar/spelling mistakes either...and this is an example of what I mean by "less-than-kind" terms.

    Plus "its" and "it's" always messes me up since the possessive doesn't use an apostrophe. Always get that one confused.
  • LiftAllThePizzas
    LiftAllThePizzas Posts: 17,857 Member
    That's the beauty of the internet, we are all anonymous and half of us don't really give a cr*p how we make other people feel.
    Many of us do not allow words on a screen to control our feelings.
  • prattiger65
    prattiger65 Posts: 1,657 Member
    Well done OP. This is also a case study in MFP butthurt. One case of open butthurt, one case of closet butthurt, one case of butthurt denial. The trifecta.
  • tennisdude2004
    tennisdude2004 Posts: 5,609 Member
    That's the beauty of the internet, we are all anonymous and half of us don't really give a cr*p how we make other people feel.
    Many of us do not allow words on a screen to control our feelings.

    I agree, I'm the same which is why I'm on here.

    Some people though do, would you agree?
  • katylil
    katylil Posts: 223 Member
    How can we get this pinned to the top of the Getting Started folder?! Great stuff.
  • tennisdude2004
    tennisdude2004 Posts: 5,609 Member
    How can we get this pinned to the top of the Getting Started folder?! Great stuff.

    I don't think anything needs to be added to the start forum. If they just dropped this it would clear up a lot of confusion for the newbies. :smile:

    We want the MyFitnessPal Community to be a fun, supportive, and friendly place for our members and we ask that all members follow our site guidelines:
  • DaneDillinger
    DaneDillinger Posts: 70 Member
    I am just here to see how many times the word "butthurt" is used...

    i have never heard of this word until i came onto this site. Its used quite alot.

    You've never seen an episode of "Workaholics?"
  • nikkihk
    nikkihk Posts: 487 Member
    You said:
    Not to be over critical but ... etc etc.. some other stuff... then ended with -

    P.S. OP your reaction to criticism is classic - maybe you should reread your thread. lol

    Umm.. she wasn't criticizing me when she posted that. Good try though. I think you need a cookie too .. HERE!!

    tumblr_m6oolzvXsJ1qfvx4yo1_500.gif

    Now go eat chocolate goodness and be merry snugglepants. XO
  • ILiftHeavyAcrylics
    ILiftHeavyAcrylics Posts: 27,732 Member
    Now I've got an ad for an instant grammar checker. :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • tennisdude2004
    tennisdude2004 Posts: 5,609 Member
    You said:
    Not to be over critical but ... etc etc.. some other stuff... then ended with -

    P.S. OP your reaction to criticism is classic - maybe you should reread your thread. lol

    Umm.. she wasn't criticizing me when she posted that. Good try though. I think you need a cookie too .. HERE!!

    tumblr_m6oolzvXsJ1qfvx4yo1_500.gif

    Now go eat chocolate goodness and be merry snugglepants. XO

    Hmmmm shweet!
  • PunkyDucky
    PunkyDucky Posts: 283 Member
    LOL..sweeet!

    bookmarking! <3
  • nikkihk
    nikkihk Posts: 487 Member
    How can we get this pinned to the top of the Getting Started folder?! Great stuff.

    I don't think anything needs to be added to the start forum. If they just dropped this it would clear up a lot of confusion for the newbies. :smile:

    We want the MyFitnessPal Community to be a fun, supportive, and friendly place for our members and we ask that all members follow our site guidelines:

    I disagree with you 92.654 percent and here is why, (I'm being serious now.. no more sarcasm for at least the next 15 mins).

    When I first joined and got involved with the forums? I blindly wondered about without a lick of guidance... though I researched the threads a bit BEFORE I posted anything, I naively engaged in conversation with what I assumed were some very angry self loathing types, one of which I'm still sad exists. Had I discovered a post like the one I've offered here to give me a window into the the good and bad of what could occur if I fell victim to the things I listed? I could have avoided the week of considering canceling my account here. I could have avoided joining in on conversations I wasn't 100% sure about (which resulted in a 5 page *kitten* kicking over sugar..?) and had I quit, I wouldn't have dropped 14 pounds since January because I would have missed out on all of the great advice I refused to listen to in week one.

    Thankfully I don't have scorned puppy syndrome so I recovered and choose to approach the forum a different way, by LISTENING which is what my entire topic is about. I didn't post this to say that the elder MFPer's are always right or that their methods are right for everyone or blah blah blah cal in cal out etc. This was completely about helping newb's survive their first few weeks in here in forum land, and since posting this? I've gotten a dozen e-mails THANKING me for the guidance. So not useful? I disagree.

    I don't remember everything else you type'd on about? But I would like to point on thing out. Yes, it would be aces if everyone held hands and sung camp songs but without a super powered attitude machine you are't likely to get your wish anytime soon so what harm is there in giving new blood a guide to avoiding that first week of wtf did I join? You can't change people Mr. Tennis, they have to make that decision on their own... but you can find ways to work with them and not go running into their camp blind with your guns a blazin'. I wish my lessons WHERE Derp... but every week it seems there is a new "People are Mean" topic and the cycle starts all over.

    But if you have the answer? (An attainable one) I welcome you to present it.
  • LiftAllThePizzas
    LiftAllThePizzas Posts: 17,857 Member
    That's the beauty of the internet, we are all anonymous and half of us don't really give a cr*p how we make other people feel.
    Many of us do not allow words on a screen to control our feelings.

    I agree, I'm the same which is why I'm on here.

    Some people though do, would you agree?
    Clearly, or I would have used the word "all" instead of "many."

    The internet culture emerges from the underlying structure and human nature. Unless you change one or both of those things it emerges from, the internet culture is not going to change. So this leaves several options:

    1- Avoid parts of the internet where you are subjected to the internet culture.

    2- Learn the way the internet culture works and figure out how to mesh it with your personality.

    3- Complain about the internet culture and or scold everyone you come across who behaves in a way you don't agree with. Which will accomplish nothing, apart from entertainment for those who find amusement in your impotent rage.

    It's ironic when you consider the fact that your scolding is directed at the people who are most immune to it, and makes it that much more likely to generate the opposite of the response you were hoping for.
  • bookworm_847
    bookworm_847 Posts: 1,903 Member
    Thanks for the great post, OP! :drinker:
  • tennisdude2004
    tennisdude2004 Posts: 5,609 Member
    That's the beauty of the internet, we are all anonymous and half of us don't really give a cr*p how we make other people feel.
    Many of us do not allow words on a screen to control our feelings.

    I agree, I'm the same which is why I'm on here.

    Some people though do, would you agree?
    Clearly, or I would have used the word "all" instead of "many."

    The internet culture emerges from the underlying structure and human nature. Unless you change one or both of those things it emerges from, the internet culture is not going to change. So this leaves several options:

    1- Avoid parts of the internet where you are subjected to the internet culture.

    2- Learn the way the internet culture works and figure out how to mesh it with your personality.

    3- Complain about the internet culture and or scold everyone you come across who behaves in a way you don't agree with. Which will accomplish nothing, apart from entertainment for those who find amusement in your impotent rage.

    It's ironic when you consider the fact that your scolding is directed at the people who are most immune to it, and makes it that much more likely to generate the opposite of the response you were hoping for.

    To be honest I thought the thread was becoming too self congratulatory and needed an alternative view.
  • spirit095
    spirit095 Posts: 1,017 Member
    This was great! Welcome to the internet lol
  • katebowen37
    katebowen37 Posts: 55 Member
    This made me laugh so hard! Thank you! Great words of wisdom to live by and very well said!
  • Kadoober
    Kadoober Posts: 289 Member
    Oooooooo.
    Do the Elder MFPers have their own guild hall?
  • cyndel1964
    cyndel1964 Posts: 7 Member
    Love it!
  • NataBost
    NataBost Posts: 418 Member
    YUP - Bumping for later!
This discussion has been closed.