Dear random old people...

1246789

Replies

  • tmauck4472
    tmauck4472 Posts: 1,785 Member
    I'm more concerned about strangers thinking it's okay to discipline my child. We, my friend and I and kids, were at pizza hut buffet having lunch and some people in the back had a screaming child. A group of elderly ladies were sitting close to the buffet and my friends little boy(he was 5) went running to the buffet to get food and this old lady grabbed his arm and told him to quit all that screaming and it wasn't polite to scream like that, now mind you it wasn't him number 1 and number 2 I understand you being irritated with the screaming kid, I was there for 2 minutes and I had had enough of it but it's not your place to correct a child or their parents. I went off on her and told her in no uncertain terms that touching another persons child in that manner is unacceptable and very rude. They called me rude and I told them that rude is grabbing someone else's child in the manner she did so and that he (the child) deserved an apology and his mother too. She finally apologized and so did I. But if they are coming up and saying how cute and touching their heads and such I see nothing wrong with it. This is what's wrong with this world people get to upset over the little stuff. And to the lady with the kid who has allergies, your situation is different and not the normal. I would think even taking the child out to eat or even in public would be to much of a risk for the child and you should just leave said child home. I'm thinking I would be so paranoid to take my child out because of all the risks to it's life and said child is safer at home. Sucks to be the child though :(
  • salladeve
    salladeve Posts: 1,053 Member
    This is so sad......

    Did you ever consider that the "random old person" may have mild dementia, and really mean no harm? I do believe that it is possible to tell the difference between a harmless elderly person and a perv.

    My grandmother is the sweetest elderly person I know and she will NOT keep her hands off small children and babies when out in public. When we take her out to lunch or shopping, we can not look away for a moment or my grandmother will zero in on the closest child she sees and make a bee line directly to them. No matter how many times we tell her "do not touch", she just can't help herself. I can't tell you how many times I've had to apologize to a parent because I couldn't catch her before she touched.

    Have a little compassion and try not to be so hard on the elderly people, you'll get there soon enough yourself, and you never know what your own mental state will be at that time.
  • FlaxMilk
    FlaxMilk Posts: 3,452 Member
    If a pedo was trying to film my kids, it would be their last...

    The old camera up the skirt happened to me as a very young teen in the 90's. I looked younger than I was too. As an adult, looking back, I realize how young I really looked. Gross. :sick:

    That wasn't my only unfortunate experience growing up. While it's not fair to single out the elderly, I can sure see why parents don't want strangers touching their kids.
  • 1stday13
    1stday13 Posts: 433 Member
    Oh yes. Also do not touch the bellies of pregnant women. That's just super creep. Even if you are cute and old. DON"T DO IT!
    This happened to me so much when I was pregnant. I finally got so angry, I started touching their bellies back.

    "What? You don't like that? Well, why on earth are you touching mine then?!" Problem solved.

    Also, don't touch my children, and get off my lawn! :angry:
    ^^:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: I'm LMAO still:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: I love it! I am a random "old person" I would not dream of touching either belly or kiddo. ( I still remember how much it bugged me when mine were little.) still :laugh: :laugh:
  • DamePiglet
    DamePiglet Posts: 3,730 Member
    I'm more concerned about strangers thinking it's okay to discipline my child. We, my friend and I and kids, were at pizza hut buffet having lunch and some people in the back had a screaming child. A group of elderly ladies were sitting close to the buffet and my friends little boy(he was 5) went running to the buffet to get food and this old lady grabbed his arm and told him to quit all that screaming and it wasn't polite to scream like that, now mind you it wasn't him number 1 and number 2 I understand you being irritated with the screaming kid, I was there for 2 minutes and I had had enough of it but it's not your place to correct a child or their parents. I went off on her and told her in no uncertain terms that touching another persons child in that manner is unacceptable and very rude. They called me rude and I told them that rude is grabbing someone else's child in the manner she did so and that he (the child) deserved an apology and his mother too. She finally apologized and so did I. But if they are coming up and saying how cute and touching their heads and such I see nothing wrong with it. This is what's wrong with this world people get to upset over the little stuff. And to the lady with the kid who has allergies, your situation is different and not the normal. I would think even taking the child out to eat or even in public would be to much of a risk for the child and you should just leave said child home. I'm thinking I would be so paranoid to take my child out because of all the risks to it's life and said child is safer at home. Sucks to be the child though :(

    Why was a 5 year old running up to a hot buffet? Many restaurants prohibit kids under 10 from serving themselves.

    Simple solution is simple.
  • sisterlilbunny
    sisterlilbunny Posts: 686 Member
    How about just don't touch people (in general) without permission? There. Problem solved.
  • TattooedNici
    TattooedNici Posts: 2,141 Member
    I just firmly correct people who think it's okay to walk up and touch my kids. They need to learn somehow.


    Yes! Age doesn't matter when it comes to this, because different age groups have this habit. I get over-protective when people invade my and my son's personal space. Why should I let someone's rudeness over ride my rights, just because they feel the urge to touch my son?
  • Dayhiker
    Dayhiker Posts: 11 Member
    I'm a random old person I reckon but I agree...I love to see the babies and talk to the mama's about them but I do not touch. My grandbabies are one and two and 2000 miles away so it's nice to see little ones about their age. I appreciate that all the mama's I've talked to seemed happy enough to let me admire them. Now don't forget to share your babies with their grandparents and great grandparents so they don't go to the dark side for a baby fix. :happy:
  • Lisa1971
    Lisa1971 Posts: 3,069 Member
    My best friend's daughter is deathly allergic to tree nuts. She has to carry an epi pen everywhere she goes and her teachers know how to use it. She's rarely allowed on playdates and birthday parties. She was able to come to my daughter's party last year but I had to be extremely vigilant about what kinds of snacks and cake to have at the party. Even the lotion and handsoap at my house had to be made sure that there were no almond or walnut ingredients in them. Very scary stuff so I can definitely sympathize with parents of children who have peanut or tree nut allergies.
  • PennyM140
    PennyM140 Posts: 423 Member
    I'm a random old person I reckon but I agree...I love to see the babies and talk to the mama's about them but I do not touch. My grandbabies are one and two and 2000 miles away so it's nice to see little ones about their age. I appreciate that all the mama's I've talked to seemed happy enough to let me admire them. Now don't forget to share your babies with their grandparents and great grandparents so they don't go to the dark side for a baby fix. :happy:

    Too Cute!! :flowerforyou:

    Yes, I sometimes think that babies remind people of their own grandchildren or maybe even their own children from when they were younger. Whatever the reason, babies bring happiness and I am all for it.
  • Derpes
    Derpes Posts: 2,033 Member
    h0F7DD340
  • Lisa1971
    Lisa1971 Posts: 3,069 Member
    I'm a random old person I reckon but I agree...I love to see the babies and talk to the mama's about them but I do not touch. My grandbabies are one and two and 2000 miles away so it's nice to see little ones about their age. I appreciate that all the mama's I've talked to seemed happy enough to let me admire them. Now don't forget to share your babies with their grandparents and great grandparents so they don't go to the dark side for a baby fix. :happy:

    What a little cutie in your profile pic!!!
  • SunofaBeach14
    SunofaBeach14 Posts: 4,899 Member
    How about just don't touch people (in general) without permission? There. Problem solved.

    Agreed. I'm actually not sure why there needs to be an old person/kiddo exception to this general rule.
  • EvgeniZyntx
    EvgeniZyntx Posts: 24,208 Member
    Thank god my son is now 12, and I dont have any daughters..... and yes I did allow older people and anyone else who wanted to to croon over and pinch his cheeks.

    It seemed unjust to keep all the cuteness for myself.

    The only boundaries I still hold near and dear is smoking, dont come near my kid with a cig, dont smoke in the car with my kid, if my kids friends have parents who smoke indoors, he isnt coming over, but if they smoke outside their home that is ok with me.

    I don't think it's too much to ask to defer to parents and their rules for their own kids. We are all going to have a different viewpoint on this, and frankly there are some damn wise people on here disagreeing with me. Again, I think it's a great idea to ask the parents.

    I complete agree with this. Your kids, your rules.

    But, (I think we talked about this before) having been falsely accused of interacting improperly with a child when a cute kid was climbing over her seat of a plane to say "hello" - I'm also sensitive that a few parents are, in my experience, too sensitive in my real life experience.

    Whether you want to err on the side of caution, which might come from environment, past parenting experience, a personal sense of responsibility, allergies, whatever ... it's likely that up front communication helps both ways. Don't want me to be friendly with your child, fine, let me know up front.

    At the other end of the spectrum, I live in a place where we kiss cheeks when we meet. Yesterday, taking my daughter to a party, we ran into a posse of her school friends on the street - a veritable squall/squeal of 9 year olds. Most of which I don't know. All quite proper when they greeted me by either shaking hands or with the two step cheek-peck. Different culture, might seem strange to you, but that is what is quite normal here. (Edit: an obviously wouldn't be normal if I was truly a stranger and not linked as a parent of anther child school child).
  • Galatea_Stone
    Galatea_Stone Posts: 2,037 Member
    this is so dumb

    let old people touch your babies
    they are from a different time

    a time with out MFP and FB where people actually had to TALK to each other for realz

    and every baby born was covetted and cherished by the community, hence the touching of bellies and babies

    young people GTFU seriously

    have some respect for older people and teach your kids the same. Your babies arent going to catch the plague from a kiss or cheek pinch of an older person. My gawd.

    Sorry, but I don't live in that world. Seriously, don't touch my kids. Most people seem to have boundaries and understand that touching strangers isn't commonly accepted here in 2014. I truly worry about those who think it's okay, because I start to question their intentions and overall judgment. Next up, pinching random girls' *kitten* because they're so damn adorable . . .


    surely you know the difference between old people enjoying a cute baby
    and a random perv pinching the butts of women.

    It is sad people ccant see the difference

    .....until you have to block a camera of some innocent looking old person trying to take an up-skirt photo of your 4 year old daughter.....

    QFT


    QFT? This happened to you? WTF?!?

    Yes. It happened. And my husband forcibly made the guy delete the photos. It was traumatizing for my daughter.
  • Lisa1971
    Lisa1971 Posts: 3,069 Member
    this is so dumb

    let old people touch your babies
    they are from a different time

    a time with out MFP and FB where people actually had to TALK to each other for realz

    and every baby born was covetted and cherished by the community, hence the touching of bellies and babies

    young people GTFU seriously

    have some respect for older people and teach your kids the same. Your babies arent going to catch the plague from a kiss or cheek pinch of an older person. My gawd.

    Sorry, but I don't live in that world. Seriously, don't touch my kids. Most people seem to have boundaries and understand that touching strangers isn't commonly accepted here in 2014. I truly worry about those who think it's okay, because I start to question their intentions and overall judgment. Next up, pinching random girls' *kitten* because they're so damn adorable . . .


    surely you know the difference between old people enjoying a cute baby
    and a random perv pinching the butts of women.

    It is sad people ccant see the difference

    .....until you have to block a camera of some innocent looking old person trying to take an up-skirt photo of your 4 year old daughter.....

    QFT


    QFT? This happened to you? WTF?!?

    Yes. It happened. And my husband forcibly made the guy delete the photos. It was traumatizing for my daughter.

    OMG I think I'd be in jail if anyone did that to my daughter. SCARY STUFF!
  • WendyTerry420
    WendyTerry420 Posts: 13,274 Member
    this is so dumb

    let old people touch your babies
    they are from a different time

    a time with out MFP and FB where people actually had to TALK to each other for realz

    and every baby born was covetted and cherished by the community, hence the touching of bellies and babies

    young people GTFU seriously

    have some respect for older people and teach your kids the same. Your babies arent going to catch the plague from a kiss or cheek pinch of an older person. My gawd.

    Sorry, but I don't live in that world. Seriously, don't touch my kids. Most people seem to have boundaries and understand that touching strangers isn't commonly accepted here in 2014. I truly worry about those who think it's okay, because I start to question their intentions and overall judgment. Next up, pinching random girls' *kitten* because they're so damn adorable . . .


    surely you know the difference between old people enjoying a cute baby
    and a random perv pinching the butts of women.

    It is sad people ccant see the difference

    .....until you have to block a camera of some innocent looking old person trying to take an up-skirt photo of your 4 year old daughter.....

    QFT


    QFT? This happened to you? WTF?!?

    Yes. It happened. And my husband forcibly made the guy delete the photos. It was traumatizing for my daughter.

    I hope the *kitten* is either dead or in jail. :flowerforyou:
  • EvgeniZyntx
    EvgeniZyntx Posts: 24,208 Member
    this is so dumb

    let old people touch your babies
    they are from a different time

    a time with out MFP and FB where people actually had to TALK to each other for realz

    and every baby born was covetted and cherished by the community, hence the touching of bellies and babies

    young people GTFU seriously

    have some respect for older people and teach your kids the same. Your babies arent going to catch the plague from a kiss or cheek pinch of an older person. My gawd.

    Sorry, but I don't live in that world. Seriously, don't touch my kids. Most people seem to have boundaries and understand that touching strangers isn't commonly accepted here in 2014. I truly worry about those who think it's okay, because I start to question their intentions and overall judgment. Next up, pinching random girls' *kitten* because they're so damn adorable . . .


    surely you know the difference between old people enjoying a cute baby
    and a random perv pinching the butts of women.

    It is sad people ccant see the difference

    .....until you have to block a camera of some innocent looking old person trying to take an up-skirt photo of your 4 year old daughter.....

    QFT


    QFT? This happened to you? WTF?!?

    Yes. It happened. And my husband forcibly made the guy delete the photos. It was traumatizing for my daughter.

    Beyond unacceptable. I hope she's gotten over it and it doesn't ever happen again, or anything like it.
  • WendyTerry420
    WendyTerry420 Posts: 13,274 Member
    Thank god my son is now 12, and I dont have any daughters..... and yes I did allow older people and anyone else who wanted to to croon over and pinch his cheeks.

    It seemed unjust to keep all the cuteness for myself.

    The only boundaries I still hold near and dear is smoking, dont come near my kid with a cig, dont smoke in the car with my kid, if my kids friends have parents who smoke indoors, he isnt coming over, but if they smoke outside their home that is ok with me.

    I don't think it's too much to ask to defer to parents and their rules for their own kids. We are all going to have a different viewpoint on this, and frankly there are some damn wise people on here disagreeing with me. Again, I think it's a great idea to ask the parents.

    I complete agree with this. Your kids, your rules.

    But, (I think we talked about this before) having been falsely accused of interacting improperly with a child when a cute kid was climbing over her seat of a plane to say "hello" - I'm also sensitive that a few parents are, in my experience, too sensitive in my real life experience.

    Whether you want to err on the side of caution, which might come from environment, past parenting experience, a personal sense of responsibility, allergies, whatever ... it's likely that up front communication helps both ways. Don't want me to be friendly with your child, fine, let me know up front.

    At the other end of the spectrum, I live in a place where we kiss cheeks when we meet. Yesterday, taking my daughter to a party, we ran into a posse of her school friends on the street - a veritable squall/squeal of 9 year olds. Most of which I don't know. All quite proper when they greeted me by either shaking hands or with the two step cheek-peck. Different culture, might seem strange to you, but that is what is quite normal here. (Edit: an obviously wouldn't be normal if I was truly a stranger and not linked as a parent of anther child school child).

    Yep, different rules indeed. Around here, an "old person" would be seen as "mean," "rude," or even "scary" if they didn't give out occasional hugs. (No cheek kissing here though, but hugs are desirable)
  • EvgeniZyntx
    EvgeniZyntx Posts: 24,208 Member
    Thank god my son is now 12, and I dont have any daughters..... and yes I did allow older people and anyone else who wanted to to croon over and pinch his cheeks.

    It seemed unjust to keep all the cuteness for myself.

    The only boundaries I still hold near and dear is smoking, dont come near my kid with a cig, dont smoke in the car with my kid, if my kids friends have parents who smoke indoors, he isnt coming over, but if they smoke outside their home that is ok with me.

    I don't think it's too much to ask to defer to parents and their rules for their own kids. We are all going to have a different viewpoint on this, and frankly there are some damn wise people on here disagreeing with me. Again, I think it's a great idea to ask the parents.

    I complete agree with this. Your kids, your rules.

    But, (I think we talked about this before) having been falsely accused of interacting improperly with a child when a cute kid was climbing over her seat of a plane to say "hello" - I'm also sensitive that a few parents are, in my experience, too sensitive in my real life experience.

    Whether you want to err on the side of caution, which might come from environment, past parenting experience, a personal sense of responsibility, allergies, whatever ... it's likely that up front communication helps both ways. Don't want me to be friendly with your child, fine, let me know up front.

    At the other end of the spectrum, I live in a place where we kiss cheeks when we meet. Yesterday, taking my daughter to a party, we ran into a posse of her school friends on the street - a veritable squall/squeal of 9 year olds. Most of which I don't know. All quite proper when they greeted me by either shaking hands or with the two step cheek-peck. Different culture, might seem strange to you, but that is what is quite normal here. (Edit: an obviously wouldn't be normal if I was truly a stranger and not linked as a parent of anther child school child).

    Yep, different rules indeed. Around here, an "old person" would be seen as "mean," "rude," or even "scary" if they didn't give out occasional hugs. (No cheek kissing here though, but hugs are desirable)

    Hugs here (France, today) are seen as weird, except by close friends and family members.
    When I rode in Iowa with my 16 year old daughter she was hugged by some friendly people (RAGBRAI) church lady that fed us, an old guy we'd been talk to for a while, some drunk women at a slip and slide.... She thought it was strange and friendly and pointed it out. I hadn't seen the difference.

    And Germans of all ages mostly just shake hands.
  • SunofaBeach14
    SunofaBeach14 Posts: 4,899 Member
    Thank god my son is now 12, and I dont have any daughters..... and yes I did allow older people and anyone else who wanted to to croon over and pinch his cheeks.

    It seemed unjust to keep all the cuteness for myself.

    The only boundaries I still hold near and dear is smoking, dont come near my kid with a cig, dont smoke in the car with my kid, if my kids friends have parents who smoke indoors, he isnt coming over, but if they smoke outside their home that is ok with me.

    I don't think it's too much to ask to defer to parents and their rules for their own kids. We are all going to have a different viewpoint on this, and frankly there are some damn wise people on here disagreeing with me. Again, I think it's a great idea to ask the parents.

    I complete agree with this. Your kids, your rules.

    But, (I think we talked about this before) having been falsely accused of interacting improperly with a child when a cute kid was climbing over her seat of a plane to say "hello" - I'm also sensitive that a few parents are, in my experience, too sensitive in my real life experience.

    Whether you want to err on the side of caution, which might come from environment, past parenting experience, a personal sense of responsibility, allergies, whatever ... it's likely that up front communication helps both ways. Don't want me to be friendly with your child, fine, let me know up front.

    At the other end of the spectrum, I live in a place where we kiss cheeks when we meet. Yesterday, taking my daughter to a party, we ran into a posse of her school friends on the street - a veritable squall/squeal of 9 year olds. Most of which I don't know. All quite proper when they greeted me by either shaking hands or with the two step cheek-peck. Different culture, might seem strange to you, but that is what is quite normal here. (Edit: an obviously wouldn't be normal if I was truly a stranger and not linked as a parent of anther child school child).

    If I know you then touching is fine. I just don't like random strangers touching without asking first. I don't mind being touched myself, and I often hug and am very comfortable with cheek kissing, I just think that clearing it with parents first, before interacting with kids, isn't too much to ask. Not clearing it, on the other hand, honestly gives me a signal that someone may have boundary issues. And, yes, talking with kids on an airplane is pretty much the norm. They want to say "hi" to everyone, at least mine did.
  • Dear random young people, really, STFU.



    QFT :grumble:
  • fbmandy55
    fbmandy55 Posts: 5,263 Member
    My fiance has his ears stretched to 1 3/4 inch. It never ceases to amaze me the strangers who come up to him in public and put their fingers in his ears or grab them. Incredibly rude!
  • Blacklance36
    Blacklance36 Posts: 755 Member
    this post makes me sad

    RANDOM OLD PEOPLE!

    I LOVE YOU!

    SORRY FOR THIS DUMB POST!

    I APOLOGIZE ON BEHALF OF OP UNTIL SHE SEES THE DUMBNESS OF HER WAYS!

    Helicopter parents wanting to control every aspect of their children's lives.... and in the end making their children so dependent on their parents that they cant relate to others or look after themselves.

    Old people touching babies....that's not wrong.

    Perhaps she should place her child in a bubble where they will be totally safe from outside "contaminants".
  • justmytype
    justmytype Posts: 117 Member
    Makes me sad too. It seems people these days keep closing themselves off more and more to others. People don't even smile at each other or nod their head at others when walking down the street. I have 4 kids and it never bothered me if someone touched or patted my child. Didn't ever feel threatened by an older person just marveling in the innocence and downright cuteness of a child. I thought it was sweet.
  • EvgeniZyntx
    EvgeniZyntx Posts: 24,208 Member
    Thank god my son is now 12, and I dont have any daughters..... and yes I did allow older people and anyone else who wanted to to croon over and pinch his cheeks.

    It seemed unjust to keep all the cuteness for myself.

    The only boundaries I still hold near and dear is smoking, dont come near my kid with a cig, dont smoke in the car with my kid, if my kids friends have parents who smoke indoors, he isnt coming over, but if they smoke outside their home that is ok with me.

    I don't think it's too much to ask to defer to parents and their rules for their own kids. We are all going to have a different viewpoint on this, and frankly there are some damn wise people on here disagreeing with me. Again, I think it's a great idea to ask the parents.

    I complete agree with this. Your kids, your rules.

    But, (I think we talked about this before) having been falsely accused of interacting improperly with a child when a cute kid was climbing over her seat of a plane to say "hello" - I'm also sensitive that a few parents are, in my experience, too sensitive in my real life experience.

    Whether you want to err on the side of caution, which might come from environment, past parenting experience, a personal sense of responsibility, allergies, whatever ... it's likely that up front communication helps both ways. Don't want me to be friendly with your child, fine, let me know up front.

    At the other end of the spectrum, I live in a place where we kiss cheeks when we meet. Yesterday, taking my daughter to a party, we ran into a posse of her school friends on the street - a veritable squall/squeal of 9 year olds. Most of which I don't know. All quite proper when they greeted me by either shaking hands or with the two step cheek-peck. Different culture, might seem strange to you, but that is what is quite normal here. (Edit: an obviously wouldn't be normal if I was truly a stranger and not linked as a parent of anther child school child).

    If I know you then touching is fine. I just don't like random strangers touching without asking first. I don't mind being touched myself, and I often hug and am very comfortable with cheek kissing, I just think that clearing it with parents first, before interacting with kids, isn't too much to ask. Not clearing it, on the other hand, honestly gives me a signal that someone may have boundary issues. And, yes, talking with kids on an airplane is pretty much the norm. They want to say "hi" to everyone, at least mine did.

    I promise I honestly don't touch random kids. :laugh:
    And from the examples here, I do see the other points of view.

    Like I said, I agree: your kids, your rules with regards to boundaries (touching, food, tv, etc...) :drinker:
  • tmauck4472
    tmauck4472 Posts: 1,785 Member
    I'm more concerned about strangers thinking it's okay to discipline my child. We, my friend and I and kids, were at pizza hut buffet having lunch and some people in the back had a screaming child. A group of elderly ladies were sitting close to the buffet and my friends little boy(he was 5) went running to the buffet to get food and this old lady grabbed his arm and told him to quit all that screaming and it wasn't polite to scream like that, now mind you it wasn't him number 1 and number 2 I understand you being irritated with the screaming kid, I was there for 2 minutes and I had had enough of it but it's not your place to correct a child or their parents. I went off on her and told her in no uncertain terms that touching another persons child in that manner is unacceptable and very rude. They called me rude and I told them that rude is grabbing someone else's child in the manner she did so and that he (the child) deserved an apology and his mother too. She finally apologized and so did I. But if they are coming up and saying how cute and touching their heads and such I see nothing wrong with it. This is what's wrong with this world people get to upset over the little stuff. And to the lady with the kid who has allergies, your situation is different and not the normal. I would think even taking the child out to eat or even in public would be to much of a risk for the child and you should just leave said child home. I'm thinking I would be so paranoid to take my child out because of all the risks to it's life and said child is safer at home. Sucks to be the child though :(

    Why was a 5 year old running up to a hot buffet? Many restaurants prohibit kids under 10 from serving themselves.

    Simple solution is simple.

    He took off before we could stop him and we were telling him to come back when the lady grabbed him. He was running up there to stand in line and wait for him momma.
  • Don't just walk up and touch babies and kids...seriously, it's creepy.

    What age are we considering old? :indifferent:
  • EvgeniZyntx
    EvgeniZyntx Posts: 24,208 Member
    My fiance has his ears stretched to 1 3/4 inch. It never ceases to amaze me the strangers who come up to him in public and put their fingers in his ears or grab them. Incredibly rude!

    Your fiancé is a child? Is this a thing?
  • SunofaBeach14
    SunofaBeach14 Posts: 4,899 Member
    Thank god my son is now 12, and I dont have any daughters..... and yes I did allow older people and anyone else who wanted to to croon over and pinch his cheeks.

    It seemed unjust to keep all the cuteness for myself.

    The only boundaries I still hold near and dear is smoking, dont come near my kid with a cig, dont smoke in the car with my kid, if my kids friends have parents who smoke indoors, he isnt coming over, but if they smoke outside their home that is ok with me.

    I don't think it's too much to ask to defer to parents and their rules for their own kids. We are all going to have a different viewpoint on this, and frankly there are some damn wise people on here disagreeing with me. Again, I think it's a great idea to ask the parents.

    I complete agree with this. Your kids, your rules.

    But, (I think we talked about this before) having been falsely accused of interacting improperly with a child when a cute kid was climbing over her seat of a plane to say "hello" - I'm also sensitive that a few parents are, in my experience, too sensitive in my real life experience.

    Whether you want to err on the side of caution, which might come from environment, past parenting experience, a personal sense of responsibility, allergies, whatever ... it's likely that up front communication helps both ways. Don't want me to be friendly with your child, fine, let me know up front.

    At the other end of the spectrum, I live in a place where we kiss cheeks when we meet. Yesterday, taking my daughter to a party, we ran into a posse of her school friends on the street - a veritable squall/squeal of 9 year olds. Most of which I don't know. All quite proper when they greeted me by either shaking hands or with the two step cheek-peck. Different culture, might seem strange to you, but that is what is quite normal here. (Edit: an obviously wouldn't be normal if I was truly a stranger and not linked as a parent of anther child school child).

    If I know you then touching is fine. I just don't like random strangers touching without asking first. I don't mind being touched myself, and I often hug and am very comfortable with cheek kissing, I just think that clearing it with parents first, before interacting with kids, isn't too much to ask. Not clearing it, on the other hand, honestly gives me a signal that someone may have boundary issues. And, yes, talking with kids on an airplane is pretty much the norm. They want to say "hi" to everyone, at least mine did.

    I promise I honestly don't touch random kids. :laugh:
    And from the examples here, I do see the other points of view.

    Like I said, I agree: your kids, your rules with regards to boundaries (touching, food, tv, etc...) :drinker:

    I'm completely confident that you're right. My guess is that we both are more concerned with the BSC creepers and the BSC over protectors, than we are about the normal range of different approaches to personal interaction and touching.
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