Body shaming at its absolute worst... thoughts please.
Replies
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Someone being honest on the Internet?? Quick flame her!
I support this article and the author.
While I don't entirely disagree with some of the points that she made, there's a difference between being honest, yet tactful, and being an *kitten*. Calling people "fatties" is ****ish, at best. Her points are largely lost in her tactless writing, and I agree with some of the other people that have stated that it says more about her own insecurities about having any amount of fat on her body. Frankly, I'm glad she doesn't have a daughter. From the sounds of the article, the poor girl would be driven into one eating disorder or another by an overly-critical mother (I've seen just such a thing happen on more than one occasion).0 -
I'm going to say something that will not earn me any friends.
The lady, as abrasive as she is, has a point. We have, and I see it everyday in my family, became a society of fat-acceptance. Several members of my family have judged ex-girlfriends for being "too skinny" when, in reality, they were at a perfectly healthy weight. They openly did this with great fanfare but, heaven forbid, you call someone fat or even overweight.
As more Americans become more and more overweight and obese the problem increases. Being overweight is not just a case of vanity. If that was the case, then whatever but if you can criticize the skinny, be prepared to get it in return. It's a situation that has lead to sky rocketing health cost, ruined lives, and wrecked families. Of Course, under eating is just as bad. The difference of course is that society accepts the health risk of being underweight and openly criticize those whom are underweight
Fat shaming is not ok but the level of misapplied political correctness that is applied to obesity status is overwhelming. It may not be those children's fault but the day you reach 18, except in special circumstances, it is. Their parents may have shown bad eating habits but that is hardly an excuse. A drug addict is still a drug addict even if their parents started them on it. Not that obesity is as bad as drugs.
We should come down on parents hard that raise obese kids. We are doing no one any favors by not doing it. Those children will, most likely, lead a life wrecked with health problems. Why are we protecting this? Why can't we just be honest and straight forward and say, "look, your kid is overweight. You're putting them at risk." Heaven forbid you say that, yet saying a kid needs to "put a little meat on his bones" is A OK.
To answer you question and to point at the elephant in the room, yes I've been body shamed. I was 6'2 and about 165 lbs, long distance runner and healthy. People told me I was twig and bones and that I was too skinny. I need to gain weight. Being skinny is unattractive. OMG look! I can see you ribs! Give me a break...
/end rant.0 -
Meh, a worthless opinion piece.
One thing I will agree with that she said is "We live in a society in which it has become OK to shame people for being skinny, but to come out and say 'You’re fat. Not healthy, not a good look' would be tantamount to a crime."
That is 100% true.
This
And then she goes on to body shame skinny people too.
ETA: At least, that's how it came across to me.0 -
In the Daily Fail:
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2686676/Why-todays-young-women-unashamed-fat-Horrified-rolls-flesh-shes-witnessed-summer-LINDA-KELSEY-takes-no-prisoners.html
Obviously this is an opinion piece but I am quite uncomfortable with both the article and the comments (which involve body shaming at both ends of the spectrum, i.e 'fat people are gross' as well as 'only dogs like bones').
I was just wondering what people thought and if you have ever been guilty of body shaming (intentionally or otherwise)?
Also, given that no one is perfect and that people's view of what is beautiful is subjective, is it ever OK to comment on another person in this way or would it be different if this article had been written about a celebrity for example?
I'm guilty of body shaming towards myself. Negative self talk is not OK but it happens. As far as verbally body shaming others, no it is not ok but you can't control what others think either. Body shaming has been a societal issue for eons and not just directed at weight.0 -
I think the way it was written is the problem for me, size etc will always be a heated discussion I go for lunch with friends and it always comes up but I hate the way that some people are naturally negative for example the article was talking about them on a beach but we don't know why they are dressed in swimwear on a beach is it a campaign for getting healthy or to make you feel accepted as you are she just assumed they were ill dressed flaunting it on a beach.
I agree with the child abuse angle and this bothers me greatly but I do think its the Daily Mail and so id ignore it0 -
I agree that she said her piece in a way that is brash and insulting, but what she is essentially saying seems to be that obesity is a problem that needs to be corrected. Isn't that what pretty much everyone here (excepting those looking to gain weight/muscle) has realized too---you are mostly all trying to lose weight because you are unhappy being fat or unhealthy and looking to improve your health, aren't you? I know I am! I don't really see how it's ok to say that fat is bad and that you don't want to be fat anymore or be trying to lose weight as it applies to yourself, but if someone else says that fat is bad and that people should lose weight, its the end of the world.
Although she wrote it in a way that was meant to get people up in arms because its the DM-the point is that a lot of people are fat nowadays and it's becoming a problem. If no one is ever allowed to say it's a problem for fear of offending people or being told that they are body shaming, when will it end?0 -
Being married to a Brit, this doesn't shock me. Stop reading the DM.
I will say, I don't entirely disagree with her statement about overfeeding children junk food being abuse, not love.
I agree that overfeeding children junk food is abuse not love. It sets them up for a life long struggle with their weight, affects their self esteem and leads to eating disorders :huh:0 -
I'm going to say something that will not earn me any friends.
The lady, as abrasive as she is, has a point. We have, and I see it everyday in my family, became a society of fat-acceptance. Several members of my family have judged ex-girlfriends for being "too skinny" when, in reality, they were at a perfectly healthy weight. They openly did this with great fanfare but, heaven forbid, you call someone fat or even overweight.
As more Americans become more and more overweight and obese the problem increases. Being overweight is not just a case of vanity. If that was the case, then whatever but if you can criticize the skinny, be prepared to get it in return. It's a situation that has lead to sky rocketing health cost, ruined lives, and wrecked families. Of Course, under eating is just as bad. The difference of course is that society accepts the health risk of being underweight and openly criticize those whom are underweight
Fat shaming is not ok but the level of misapplied political correctness that is applied to obesity status is overwhelming. It may not be those children's fault but the day you reach 18, except in special circumstances, it is. Their parents may have shown bad eating habits but that is hardly an excuse. A drug addict is still a drug addict even if their parents started them on it. Not that obesity is as bad as drugs.
We should come down on parents hard that raise obese kids. We are doing no one any favors by not doing it. Those children will, most likely, lead a life wrecked with health problems. Why are we protecting this? Why can't we just be honest and straight forward and say, "look, your kid is overweight. You're putting them at risk." Heaven forbid you say that, yet saying a kid needs to "put a little meat on his bones" is A OK.
/end rant.
I don't think anyone's disagreeing with what you've stated, actually. However, calling people "fatties" is tactless, to say the least, as is "One way to start might be by calling a fat girl a fat girl. No apology required."
Seriously, does she not think that most girls/women who are overweight and obese don't already know this about themselves? While there are some who do have that "don't give a damn" attitude, many just project it, at least for a period of time, or hanging out with their friends helps them get away from the negativity they are drowned in every time they look in the mirror or at a magazine cover.
There are far too many women who have ended up with metabolic and endocrine issues from it, as well, that have then actively tried to lose weight and have gone through some pretty hefty extremes, just to fail, and finally say "f this. If I'm going to be fat anyway, I might as well enjoy things instead of depriving myself for a goal that's obviously impossible."
The thing is, though, no one can know which type of person someone is, just by seeing them for 5 minutes in a line to somewhere. Like someone else mentioned, for all she knows, they've already lost a significant amount of weight and are treating themselves to a shared bag of chips as they go for a walk or whatever.
On a side note, given the lack of both fat and muscle in her picture, I'd be curious to see a) her thoughts on more muscular women, and b) just how much body fat crosses the line from "okay" to "disgusting" in her mind, just out of morbid curiosity.0 -
I'm going to say something that will not earn me any friends.
The lady, as abrasive as she is, has a point. We have, and I see it everyday in my family, became a society of fat-acceptance. Several members of my family have judged ex-girlfriends for being "too skinny" when, in reality, they were at a perfectly healthy weight. They openly did this with great fanfare but, heaven forbid, you call someone fat or even overweight.
As more Americans become more and more overweight and obese the problem increases. Being overweight is not just a case of vanity. If that was the case, then whatever but if you can criticize the skinny, be prepared to get it in return. It's a situation that has lead to sky rocketing health cost, ruined lives, and wrecked families. Of Course, under eating is just as bad. The difference of course is that society accepts the health risk of being underweight and openly criticize those whom are underweight
Fat shaming is not ok but the level of misapplied political correctness that is applied to obesity status is overwhelming. It may not be those children's fault but the day you reach 18, except in special circumstances, it is. Their parents may have shown bad eating habits but that is hardly an excuse. A drug addict is still a drug addict even if their parents started them on it. Not that obesity is as bad as drugs.
We should come down on parents hard that raise obese kids. We are doing no one any favors by not doing it. Those children will, most likely, lead a life wrecked with health problems. Why are we protecting this? Why can't we just be honest and straight forward and say, "look, your kid is overweight. You're putting them at risk." Heaven forbid you say that, yet saying a kid needs to "put a little meat on his bones" is A OK.
To answer you question and to point at the elephant in the room, yes I've been body shamed. I was 6'2 and about 165 lbs, long distance runner and healthy. People told me I was twig and bones and that I was too skinny. I need to gain weight. Being skinny is unattractive. OMG look! I can see you ribs! Give me a break...
/end rant.
Totally agree! Obesity is costing the health care system aka your tax dollars.0 -
OK I eagerly await to get shot down for this. But don't you think she has a point? Just wade through the poorly written daily mail sensationalism and actually think about the point being made. Yes the woman writing it doesn't sound the most pleasant individual but she has a point.
We all see the Women and men wondering around without a care in the world seemingly happy with their size. What's the explanation for this. What's wrong with calling someone fat if they're fat? I was Fat I still am technically fat. Surely hiding behind this article and accusing it of fat shaming is just using excuses to hide a problem. IT seems a lot of 'Fat' people don't like the truth they don't want to be called fat in a way to avoid what they are. As for Fat shaming maybe people should be ashamed to be fat if that's what it takes to take affirmative action.0 -
There are far too many women who have ended up with metabolic and endocrine issues from it, as well, that have then actively tried to lose weight and have gone through some pretty hefty extremes, just to fail, and finally say "f this. If I'm going to be fat anyway, I might as well enjoy things instead of depriving myself for a goal that's obviously impossible."
Yes, a lot of people try to lose weight and fail...I know I have several times and am still constantly working on myself. But just because people have difficulty dieting/losing weight does not mean that we should all just give up, put on more and more weight each year, and just let the consequences be what they may. Instead I think that it shouldn't be such a shameful thing to admit that you are struggling with your weight and that you need help, and that there should be more resources available with practical information, instead of peddling fad diets and pills that don't work and lead to the situation you described above!0 -
Someone being honest on the Internet?? Quick flame her!
I support this article and the author.
While I don't entirely disagree with some of the points that she made, there's a difference between being honest, yet tactful, and being an *kitten*. Calling people "fatties" is ****ish, at best. Her points are largely lost in her tactless writing, and I agree with some of the other people that have stated that it says more about her own insecurities about having any amount of fat on her body. Frankly, I'm glad she doesn't have a daughter. From the sounds of the article, the poor girl would be driven into one eating disorder or another by an overly-critical mother (I've seen just such a thing happen on more than one occasion).
So calling someone anorexic (which is socially acceptable for some reason) is better or more allowed then calling someone who is obese a fatty.
Nope.0 -
I'm going to say something that will not earn me any friends.
The lady, as abrasive as she is, has a point. We have, and I see it everyday in my family, became a society of fat-acceptance. Several members of my family have judged ex-girlfriends for being "too skinny" when, in reality, they were at a perfectly healthy weight. They openly did this with great fanfare but, heaven forbid, you call someone fat or even overweight.
As more Americans become more and more overweight and obese the problem increases. Being overweight is not just a case of vanity. If that was the case, then whatever but if you can criticize the skinny, be prepared to get it in return. It's a situation that has lead to sky rocketing health cost, ruined lives, and wrecked families. Of Course, under eating is just as bad. The difference of course is that society accepts the health risk of being underweight and openly criticize those whom are underweight
Fat shaming is not ok but the level of misapplied political correctness that is applied to obesity status is overwhelming. It may not be those children's fault but the day you reach 18, except in special circumstances, it is. Their parents may have shown bad eating habits but that is hardly an excuse. A drug addict is still a drug addict even if their parents started them on it. Not that obesity is as bad as drugs.
We should come down on parents hard that raise obese kids. We are doing no one any favors by not doing it. Those children will, most likely, lead a life wrecked with health problems. Why are we protecting this? Why can't we just be honest and straight forward and say, "look, your kid is overweight. You're putting them at risk." Heaven forbid you say that, yet saying a kid needs to "put a little meat on his bones" is A OK.
To answer you question and to point at the elephant in the room, yes I've been body shamed. I was 6'2 and about 165 lbs, long distance runner and healthy. People told me I was twig and bones and that I was too skinny. I need to gain weight. Being skinny is unattractive. OMG look! I can see you ribs! Give me a break...
/end rant.
I agree with Joe, yeah maybe she jumped to some conclusions and yeah maybe those three fatties were on diets, but still, it is pretty disgraceful they keep have to make larger and larger clothing sizes because people can't control themselves. Size 3XL didn't exists 20 years ago. I agree with the women who wrote the article that it's not OK to sugar coat this problem and we are being too PC. Yes, there is a problem with being fat. I'm not talking about 20-30 pounds overweight, that's cool you like to eat and drink, so do I, I'm talking about the people who are 30, 40, 50 and 100s of pounds overweight. Doesn't happen overnight and everybody knows it is unhealthy. Yeah, sure, some fat people are really strong, but they'd be stronger and faster if they didn't have so much extra weight hanging off of them. I am OK with shaming fat people if it makes them lose weight. In fact, I don't really even think she's really shaming. She's calling it like it is. Like she said in the article if we can shame people for smoke cigarettes, then we can shame them for being fat. Just because your fat it doesn't make you a terrible person, but you should at least try to do something about it.
If you people want to be PC about it and never have anyone call you fat again, then don't use my tax dollars to pay for your ride to the hospital in a double-wide ambulance because you can't walk. You can't have it both ways. As long as I'm paying for the hospital bills for irresponsible fatties, I can call them fat all I want.0 -
We live in a society in which it has become OK to shame people for being skinny, but to come out and say 'You’re fat. Not healthy, not a good look' would be tantamount to a crime.
It's about time we stopped tiptoeing around the size issue, stopped kidding ourselves that anorexia, however serious, is the biggest eating problem we face, and started to tackle fat for the problem that it is.
Not because celebrities and models are worthy of emulating but because fat is a blight on both individuals and society.
One way to start might be by calling a fat girl a fat girl. No apology required.
^This.
Fat adjective \ˈfat\: having a lot of extra flesh on your body : having a lot of body fat
When it really comes down to it, its a descriptor. I'm not insulting you by saying you are fat if you are indeed fat. It's not a personal attack, its a fact. It's not like most people don't know it...of course I would never go up to someone and tell them, hey, you're really fat! But it should be ok for a doctor, or a family member, or close friend to say to someone, listen, you have a lot of fat and it's not healthy. I'm worried about you.
Saying that someone is fat should not mean that they are a bad person, lazy, disgusting, etc...it just means that they have extra body fat, which is unhealthy and should not be ignored. Step one of the problem may be reclaiming this word for what it truly should mean, so people can start to have honest conversations about it!1 -
i think that too many people are concerned with having other people approve of their decisions and looks and need to grow up .
i also think that other people shouldnt give a about what my opinions are about their body, pretty much the same as I do to them.
i really dont understand why people need to have a consensus on stuff like this. noone can make you feel ashamed unless you give them power to do that.0 -
I think my favorite part of these articles is the fact (that they always neglect to mention) that shaming is not only ineffective, but a counter-productive means to get someone to do something. It's been proven that making someone feel bad about being fat actually hurts their chances of losing weight. Negative reinforcement isn't effective in many scenarios, this being one of them.
So the author's call to action for skinny people to start shaming fat people is hilariously misguided (in many ways).1 -
Someone being honest on the Internet?? Quick flame her!
I support this article and the author.
Same, sorry for those who disagree.0 -
I don't like the tone of the piece at all, but as a parent, it saddens me to see overweight children of any age. I know some kids may have a medical issue or whatnot, so I try not to judge, but I do cringe when I see parents letting their kids eat packages of cookies and chips and cakes all day with reckless abandon and then just keep buying them more. Apple anyone?
Also, I do agree with her point about the clothes on these girls. I have seen this first hand and find it wholely distasteful and dare I say humiliating to young kids, girls in particular, when they are obviously wearing clothes that are WAY too small for them and WAY too revealing. The revealing thing revolts me at any size for a teenager. They're kids. Let them be kids.
My guess is 99% of these overweight kids have overweight parents who are teaching them this is not an issue to be concerned enough about to change it, this is not necessarily their fault.0
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