Body shaming at its absolute worst... thoughts please.

Shaming...be it for weight, smoking, drug addiction...whatever is counterproductive.

You don't tell someone that they are worthless, and then tell that they are capable of doing something exceptionally difficult.

What you do tell them:

You're worthwhile.

You can do something.

I'm willing to help you.

How shall we start?

This is called coddling and does not work. The question is are u ready to drop the excuses? Ready to work hard sweat and be a tad uncomfortable? Do u really want this?

The 2 approaches are not mutually exclusive - people can be told they are worthwhile and can do something and also be told it will be uncomfortable and they need to sweat hard at it.

I don't think shaming people ever motivates them to do anything though.

I think nearly all people learn all things better through positive reinforcement and encouragement, rather than shaming and punitive measures.

Exactly. Why does it have to be either/or? Can we not, as a society, admit that being obese is unhealthy and encourage others to lose weight WITHOUT calling them "fatties" and telling them to "cover up"?? It is very rare that shaming someone actually accomplishes anything. So why do it, other than just to make someone feel bad? Trust me, no fat person looks in the mirror and doesn't know they're fat.

The most bothersome thing about this thread are those commenting about others' appearance. It's one thing to be concerned about the health of our country, it's another to bash someone b/c they have "dimples" (btw, a lot of thin women have cellulite, should they forgo the shorts too?).

yes no one wants to see cellulite and dimples on anything fat or thin.

These things exist, keep them at home, love yourself but the rest of the world does not need to see it and we dont WANT to see it. Keep it at home where it belongs

I can't stand it when people like you who have been hardened by one thing or another issue these proclamations on what people should do and just what the world does and does not want to see. And of course it's always delivered in an unkind way preceded by an "I'm just being honest." You are being honest but only about your sh1tty world view, not the world. Just because someone isn't disgusted by an imperfect human body doesn't mean they're lying, or coddling, or living a make believe world. Your cold, crappy "reality" is just yours, thank god.

I love you.

this

In.

(Wait. Was I already in this thread? Oh well, just in case...in.)

no, you weren't. because I just saw it in your news feed.

Oh, I guess I'm in too, now.

Oh wow, people wear what they WANT?! And they don't apologise for their fatness and force your poor eyes to look? Christ almighty what a *****. ***** needs to worry about herself and realize that other people aren't here to decorate her world.

they need to care about themselves, dress appropriately and present their best to the world.

That's a nice booty call tattoo you've got going there.

I don't think shaming people ever motivates them to do anything though.

I think nearly all people learn all things better through positive reinforcement and encouragement, rather than shaming and punitive measures.

I will have to disagree with you here.
My mom started gaining weight slowly in her early 30's. We all have been trying in the most supportive way to get her to eat a little less and healthier, but nothing worked. She was just getting bigger. At 56yo she was about 300lbs (5'7")

Then one day she met a classmate she hasn't seen in 10 years. He said something like: "Hey, look what you have done to yourself, you are so fat I didn't recognize you"

Was she mad? Hell yah!! She went home and cried for hours. But then she started desperately searching for a way to lose weight. In 1 year she lost 120lbs, now she has maintained for another year and says she will never go back to being fat. More because she feels much better health wise and enjoys life, but all started with a nasty comment

Oh look it worked once, it must be more effective

Even then, a comment like this from someone you've known in your youth is actually not that bad, and the receiver may actually know it's coming from a place of love due to a shared history. I bet this man would blush if he read some of the posts here!

Oh wow, people wear what they WANT?! And they don't apologise for their fatness and force your poor eyes to look? Christ almighty what a *****. ***** needs to worry about herself and realize that other people aren't here to decorate her world.

they need to care about themselves, dress appropriately and present their best to the world.

As I said, other people are not here to decorate your world. Spending time commenting on the appearance of others and dictating to others what to and not to wear is time wasted.

This pissed me off so bad.

The only body anyone should be worried about is there own! Shamming fat people is wrong and shamming a skinny person is wrong, its also very annoying. Worry about yourself, there is always something else be hide that persons weight. We are more than just a number on a scale. I do think people should eat healthier and exercise more and that's about it, but to each its own at the end of the day.

I think that this article has far less to do with an obesity epidemic than it has to do with a writer hoping to become some well paid pundit on some cable TV show.

I'm not a fan of shame, but I think it's a bit disingenuous to suggest that shaming someone isn't effective to move them toward action.

For crying out loud there an entire culture of shame in Japan surrounding women and their weight. It's a well studied phenomenon. There is an expectation of thinness, and negative social consequences, and yes shame, for not meeting those expectations. It's been enough to help keep Japanese women reversing the world wide trend of increasing obesity, as they are actually overall getting thinner.

There are societies and cultures in this world that simply do not tolerate obesity. I know a few people from various Asian cultures where it's common for people to flat out say to a friend or loved one "hey, you got fat". It's expected. The tiptoeing around fat is something that is becoming more pervasive in western societies but it's hardly universal. And the pressure to conform is powerful, and shame can absolutely be a powerful motivator.

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I'm sure I'll be beaten severely about the head and shoulders for this, but honestly...as an obese person, a "fatty" if you will, she did nothing in the article but tell the truth....and yes, sometimes the truth is an unpleasant thing to have to confront, but until we do, we're not likely to improve our lot in life.

For most of us, it's been years of avoiding the truth about our weight. We camouflage it by couching it in terms like: my metabolism is slowing down, or I've quit smoking, or it comes with age....all bs excuses to avoid facing the truth that we've elected over the years to let ourselves go.

By her own admission her article and opinion is not politically correct, just as it should be. Sugar coating an opinion or facts isn't going to motivate me, or I suspect anyone else....this article was intended to shame us into action. Most of us are here because we ARE taking actions to improve our appearance, health or both....if her article shames 10's, 100's or 1,000's of others into taking action....at the risk of sun-burning my follicly challenged pate, my hats off to her.

I couldn't help but think exactly what she ended up expressing one day while waiting at a crosswalk in front of a highschool in Phoenix as the kids passed in front of me. At least half these kids, both boys and girls were fat or obese....there's no other way to say it. Recalling back to my high school years....I can only remember 2 kids in the whole school (not just my class) that were fat.

If something isn't done to turn the obesity tide, these kids are going to have very short, miserable lives giving themselves insulin shots and dialysis as kidneys fail etc. I speak from experience.....fortunately I'm a ways from diabetes, but I did have my heart explode last year....something that didn't need to happen....nothing genetic in the family history at all....just MY poor eating habits and lack of exercise....and there's no politically correct way of saying that....sorry.

to the poster above me, good post, and absolutely, people dont like hearing the truth

I'm not a fan of shame, but I think it's a bit disingenuous to suggest that shaming someone isn't effective to move them toward action.

For crying out loud there an entire culture of shame in Japan surrounding women and their weight. It's a well studied phenomenon. There is an expectation of thinness, and negative social consequences, and yes shame, for not meeting those expectations. It's been enough to help keep Japanese women reversing the world wide trend of increasing obesity, as they are actually overall getting thinner.

There are societies and cultures in this world that simply do not tolerate obesity. I know a few people from various Asian cultures where it's common for people to flat out say to a friend or loved one "hey, you got fat". It's expected. The tiptoeing around fat is something that is becoming more pervasive in western societies but it's hardly universal. And the pressure to conform is powerful, and shame can absolutely be a powerful motivator.

Yes, shame is a very powerful force in Japan.

Say, what's the leading cause of death in that nation among males aged 20-44?

Oh wow, people wear what they WANT?! And they don't apologise for their fatness and force your poor eyes to look? Christ almighty what a *****. ***** needs to worry about herself and realize that other people aren't here to decorate her world.

they need to care about themselves, dress appropriately and present their best to the world.

As I said, other people are not here to decorate your world. Spending time commenting on the appearance of others and dictating to others what to and not to wear is time wasted.

THINK OF THE CHILDREN!

Seriously, if you have not figured out the world I feel sorry for you. Try getting a job rolling in for an interview with rolls and cellulite hanging out. Looks matter.

I love my obese friends, does not mean I enjoy it when they let it all hang out. Dress appropriate for your age/size/build.

The girls in the article were going on holiday, not for a job interview.

Being shamed is what got me wanting to be healthy in the first place. But I'm not a delicate little flower so....