Say wha?!?!? Worlds most awkward conversation starters

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Replies

  • randomtai
    randomtai Posts: 9,003 Member
    "Yo ma, Lemme buy you some chicken".... A real panty dropper there.
  • SuperSexyDork
    SuperSexyDork Posts: 1,669 Member
    "Yo ma, Lemme buy you some chicken".... A real panty dropper there.

    Bahahaha! Ranks up there with, one of my favorites. While walking one night, a guy pulled over and asked me if I wanted to go to Burger King with him. He said he'd buy me a Whopper... I laughed and kept walking.
  • WhatAnAss
    WhatAnAss Posts: 1,598 Member
    I was at a Truck stop convenience store and a driver was in line behind me and said...

    "Wow young lady you smell so clean.."

    WTF? What kind of women have you been around lately?

    Truck stop.. Truckers... Lot Lizards. If you know what those are then you know where that comment came from! :laugh: :laugh:

    Oh I know lol I had 2 truck drivers in my family.....nasty!:laugh:
  • headofphat
    headofphat Posts: 1,597 Member
    "Yo ma, Lemme buy you some chicken".... A real panty dropper there.

    The chicken part I get. I love chicken myself and would love to be offered some. What i don't get is the "ma" part. Mommy issues? Weird.
  • delicious_cocktail
    delicious_cocktail Posts: 5,797 Member
    "Yo ma, Lemme buy you some chicken".... A real panty dropper there.

    Bahahaha! Ranks up there with, one of my favorites. While walking one night, a guy pulled over and asked me if I wanted to go to Burger King with him. He said he'd buy me a Whopper... I laughed and kept walking.

    And by "whopper" I mean "roofie."
  • SheBeButLittleSheisFierce
    SheBeButLittleSheisFierce Posts: 690 Member
    I was working at a small ice cream shop in college. My creepy uncle, of which I try to avoid, walks in. I try to avoid him but there is only so many places you can go. Next thing I knew he was right next to me, started rubbing my back and said, "Mmmm, I always knew you would be the pretty one." Um Ewww. I quickly went to the back area abandoning the guy I was working with and wouldn't come out until he was gone!
  • TheNewPriceIsLoading
    TheNewPriceIsLoading Posts: 2,135 Member
    I'm afraid I said this one at a bar to a guy that offered to buy me a drink....because I am horribly awkward when I find a man attractive.

    **him** Hi can I buy you a drink?

    **me** I like zombies, they are cool....they eat brains.....yep...*walks away*

    Yeah my brain stopped working

    :drinker: :flowerforyou: :love:
  • sixout
    sixout Posts: 3,128 Member
    I was working at a small ice cream shop in college. My creepy uncle, of which I try to avoid, walks in. I try to avoid him but there is only so many places you can go. Next thing I knew he was right next to me, started rubbing my back and said, "Mmmm, I always knew you would be the pretty one." Um Ewww. I quickly went to the back area abandoning the guy I was working with and wouldn't come out until he was gone!

    I mean, I don't like accusing people or anything. But you should probably tell someone about that.
  • leggup
    leggup Posts: 2,942 Member
    "So, are you married or engaged?" -Person I was doing social ballroom with, when he felt my ring (I guess?). What difference does it make, dude? You don't have a chance either way and you just made your dance partner mega uncomfortable.

    "Is your husband tall? I always wanted to marry a tall woman." -Said lecherously by a very short married man.

    "I like your pictures" -Said by dozens of MyFitnessPal men. I only have 1 picture at a time? So.. where are you getting the other pictures?

    "We've met before. In the bathroom, once." -Lady at my work who I didn't recall meeting.
  • SheBeButLittleSheisFierce
    SheBeButLittleSheisFierce Posts: 690 Member
    I was working at a small ice cream shop in college. My creepy uncle, of which I try to avoid, walks in. I try to avoid him but there is only so many places you can go. Next thing I knew he was right next to me, started rubbing my back and said, "Mmmm, I always knew you would be the pretty one." Um Ewww. I quickly went to the back area abandoning the guy I was working with and wouldn't come out until he was gone!

    I mean, I don't like accusing people or anything. But you should probably tell someone about that.
    It was years ago and I did. Thankfully I live 800 miles away from him now. I'm not the only person he has done creepy things to. Could write a book.
  • Holly_Roman_Empire
    Holly_Roman_Empire Posts: 4,440 Member
    It's not really a conversation starter, but the most awkward interaction I've had with a stranger was something like this: My husband, myself, and our toddler went to a shop to get him new glasses. The woman that was helping him out said, "Oh my gosh, what a CUTE baby!" We had never seen her before or interacted before, and yet she proceeded to pick her up, toss her in the air and blow raspberries on her cheek.

    My baby started crying and screaming as soon as she picked her up. You've never seen a mom flip out like I did in that moment.
  • delicious_cocktail
    delicious_cocktail Posts: 5,797 Member
    "So, are you married or engaged?" -Person I was doing social ballroom with, when he felt my ring (I guess?). What difference does it make, dude? You don't have a chance either way and you just made your dance partner mega uncomfortable.

    "Is your husband tall? I always wanted to marry a tall woman." -Said lecherously by a very short married man.

    "I like your pictures" -Said by dozens of MyFitnessPal men. I only have 1 picture at a time? So.. where are you getting the other pictures?

    "We've met before. In the bathroom, once." -Lady at my work who I didn't recall meeting.

    If "I like your pictures" is the creepiest thing that's ever been said to you by MFP men, then you and I need to talk. Privately. At length. How is 2:00pm Eastern for you today?
  • leggup
    leggup Posts: 2,942 Member
    "So, are you married or engaged?" -Person I was doing social ballroom with, when he felt my ring (I guess?). What difference does it make, dude? You don't have a chance either way and you just made your dance partner mega uncomfortable.

    "Is your husband tall? I always wanted to marry a tall woman." -Said lecherously by a very short married man.

    "I like your pictures" -Said by dozens of MyFitnessPal men. I only have 1 picture at a time? So.. where are you getting the other pictures?

    "We've met before. In the bathroom, once." -Lady at my work who I didn't recall meeting.

    If "I like your pictures" is the creepiest thing that's ever been said to you by MFP men, then you and I need to talk. Privately. At length. How is 2:00pm Eastern for you today?
    Ha. I was just going with awkward conversation starters, not the creepy ones.
  • kacpakmom
    kacpakmom Posts: 98 Member
    I had a person I had never met or seen before come up to me and ask if I had gastric bypass surgery because I looked so deflated ...um wth??
  • askeates
    askeates Posts: 1,490 Member
    My 2 least favorite:

    I'm really not a creeper, but can I play with your hair.... as he had a handful of it! (FYI, if you have to preface the statement with I'm not a creep/creeper, that usually mean, yes you really are).

    OMG, you smell so good (as he came up behind me and was sniffing my neck and hair).... :huh:
  • delicious_cocktail
    delicious_cocktail Posts: 5,797 Member
    If "I like your pictures" is the creepiest thing that's ever been said to you by MFP men, then you and I need to talk. Privately. At length. How is 2:00pm Eastern for you today?
    Ha. I was just going with awkward conversation starters, not the creepy ones.

    Ahh. I see. Are we still on for 2:00?
  • BlueBombers
    BlueBombers Posts: 4,064 Member
    Guy wearing only a t-shirt and no pants (or underwear) comes up to me at the beach and asked me if I was alone.
  • He1loKitty
    He1loKitty Posts: 212 Member
    The creepiest: "You have a beautiful belly." Said to me by some passing guy on a sidewalk while I was on my phone. The wind had briefly blown my shirt slightly up.

    The funniest: "You lookin' good tonight!" Also said by a passing guy on a sidewalk after I had just finished a run. I couldn't help but laugh and say thanks.

    I think the difference was that the first guy had crazy eyes and looked like he wanted to murder me, whereas the second guy was smiling and showing his genuine appreciation.
  • leggup
    leggup Posts: 2,942 Member
    If "I like your pictures" is the creepiest thing that's ever been said to you by MFP men, then you and I need to talk. Privately. At length. How is 2:00pm Eastern for you today?
    Ha. I was just going with awkward conversation starters, not the creepy ones.
    Ahh. I see. Are we still on for 2:00?
    -.-

    I thought of another awkward conversation starter, equal parts my fault and the other person's fault. I was at a gas station and a guy fueling up behind me goes, "Do you like it?" and points vaguely towards the back of my car. Now, at the time, I had a sign taped on the inside of my back window that read BURRITO ON BOARD. I thought this was hilarious. So when he said, "Do you like it?" I said, "Yes, I love burritos." He looked at me with the most confused expression that instantly told me I had 1. Misheard him. 2. Was very stupid. "No I meant your car. That's a mini cooper, right?" I nodded, said something about it being the best car ever, and got out of there asap.
  • BlueBombers
    BlueBombers Posts: 4,064 Member
    I had a person I had never met or seen before come up to me and ask if I had gastric bypass surgery because I looked so deflated ...um wth??

    I hope you gave them a knuckle sandwich for that one!
  • RaspberryKeytoneBoondoggle
    RaspberryKeytoneBoondoggle Posts: 1,349 Member
    I've had strangers approach me to talk about my eyes a few times, but It didn't feel awkward and I can't really think of any other potential awkward situations. I think I might be an awkward conversation starter, maybe that's why I don't notice.
  • Timshel_
    Timshel_ Posts: 22,834 Member
    "Ughhh, they were out of TP in that restroom" *extends hand to shake*
  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,740 Member
    When I was 19, I worked in a supermarket and a guy around my age came in and bought some items and said, "Hey, I remember you from the carnival! You were standing by the Himalayan and you had a red sweatshirt on and your hair in braids!"

    I do remember fitting that description - it was the 90's and I had a red hooded sweatshirt I loved - and being at the carnival...but it was about a YEAR earlier. So weird!
  • laynerich15
    laynerich15 Posts: 1,918 Member
    Has to of been said

    "whens the baby due" to some who isn't pregnant
  • laynerich15
    laynerich15 Posts: 1,918 Member
    Ok but one that has happened to me.

    Was dating a girl in my younger years and here slightly young cousin looked exactly the same from behind.

    walked up put my arms around who I thought to be my GF and kissed her on the neck... that was slightly awkard
  • kaaaaylee
    kaaaaylee Posts: 398
    Old lady comes up to my wife and me with our first kid in a stroller. She looks right at me and asks, "Is the baby yours?"

    I told her we are sure it's mine but we are not sure she is the mother.

    Win.

    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • _Tink_
    _Tink_ Posts: 3,845 Member
    Last night: "You look familiar, do I know you from somewhere? I must recognize you from Texas." Dafuq??
  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,740 Member
    When my twins were babies, a woman came up to me in a parking lot and asked if they were twins (this happened all the time).
    When I said yes, she said "they can't be; that one has to be at least six months older than the other..."

    Her husband and I exchanged looks. It was just awkward.

    That is nutty!! haha

    I've seen a meme lately that some friends w/ twins have passed around...if someone asks if your kids are twins, you say "No, they're triplets but I leave the ugly one at home"
  • juliewatkin
    juliewatkin Posts: 764 Member
    Recently when I was out walking the dog, two young men shouted than I had a nice dog and followed that with "You're beautiful". I guess I'm more incensed that my dog gets more attention. People have shouted out of moving cars that she's beautiful. She's pretty but it's reached the point of ridiculous at times. They were right about me though.:smile:
  • Iceberg_Simpson
    Iceberg_Simpson Posts: 737 Member
    "What the fawk are you talking about?!?"

    That's what I like to say to people that haven't said anything.

    Typically strangers in the street.

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