Why are people so hateful??

I get an urge to start a thread with the request to provide your interpretation of the words:
Meanie
Bully
Hater

But you don't get to accuse anyone unless you post examples from the forums. Wonder how it would develop...

I don't think many people even know what the meaning of these words are.

Just disagreeing with someone, even if it's dangerous, and you get thrown into the lions den, for being a hater and rude.

Can I ask why people keep trying to help others here? I enjoy helping new people, but really the "you suck and are a mean hater for disagreeing with my 500 calorie a day juice cleanse" is really frustrating. Demotivating when it comes to helping new people, and I haven't been trying that long. Some of you have been here slugging through the trenches for a long time. You are articulate, thoughtful and helpful.

I'm probably being overly sensitive (obviously, I am) but what's the point in trying to help others when they backhand you for it?

A few people have directly informed me that the advice I've given them has been spot on. Others have done the contrary. As long as I feel there is even one person out there, who might find just what they needed to hear in what I had to say, I will keep posting. I admire those, who have been around much longer, because it takes a certain kind of teflon skin not to be bothered by the insulting insinuations that one is a hater, meanie, or bully.

I actually did stop helping people.

That makes me sad, because you were one of the people I first appreciated here.

It was a combination of weariness of defending science against opinion based pseudoscience, it being a near thankless effort, and the site staff ignoring common sense suggestions that would have greatly benefitted new users and freed up the advice-givers to concentrate their efforts more efficiently. That and it seemed like they were sometimes directly working against established science and setting back our efforts.

Are you talking about the MFP Blog and the sugar warning?

OMG.

I get an urge to start a thread with the request to provide your interpretation of the words:
Meanie
Bully
Hater

But you don't get to accuse anyone unless you post examples from the forums. Wonder how it would develop...

I don't think many people even know what the meaning of these words are.

Just disagreeing with someone, even if it's dangerous, and you get thrown into the lions den, for being a hater and rude.

Can I ask why people keep trying to help others here? I enjoy helping new people, but really the "you suck and are a mean hater for disagreeing with my 500 calorie a day juice cleanse" is really frustrating. Demotivating when it comes to helping new people, and I haven't been trying that long. Some of you have been here slugging through the trenches for a long time. You are articulate, thoughtful and helpful.

I'm probably being overly sensitive (obviously, I am) but what's the point in trying to help others when they backhand you for it?

A few people have directly informed me that the advice I've given them has been spot on. Others have done the contrary. As long as I feel there is even one person out there, who might find just what they needed to hear in what I had to say, I will keep posting. I admire those, who have been around much longer, because it takes a certain kind of teflon skin not to be bothered by the insulting insinuations that one is a hater, meanie, or bully.

I actually did stop helping people.

That makes me sad, because you were one of the people I first appreciated here.

It was a combination of weariness of defending science against opinion based pseudoscience, it being a near thankless effort, and the site staff ignoring common sense suggestions that would have greatly benefitted new users and freed up the advice-givers to concentrate their efforts more efficiently. That and it seemed like they were sometimes directly working against established science and setting back our efforts.

Are you talking about the MFP Blog and the sugar warning?

OMG.

That is precisely it.

However, they did finally take my suggestion of offering mod positions to some of the more knowledgable users. That was a great step.

I get an urge to start a thread with the request to provide your interpretation of the words:
Meanie
Bully
Hater

But you don't get to accuse anyone unless you post examples from the forums. Wonder how it would develop...

I don't think many people even know what the meaning of these words are.

Just disagreeing with someone, even if it's dangerous, and you get thrown into the lions den, for being a hater and rude.

Can I ask why people keep trying to help others here? I enjoy helping new people, but really the "you suck and are a mean hater for disagreeing with my 500 calorie a day juice cleanse" is really frustrating. Demotivating when it comes to helping new people, and I haven't been trying that long. Some of you have been here slugging through the trenches for a long time. You are articulate, thoughtful and helpful.

I'm probably being overly sensitive (obviously, I am) but what's the point in trying to help others when they backhand you for it?

A few people have directly informed me that the advice I've given them has been spot on. Others have done the contrary. As long as I feel there is even one person out there, who might find just what they needed to hear in what I had to say, I will keep posting. I admire those, who have been around much longer, because it takes a certain kind of teflon skin not to be bothered by the insulting insinuations that one is a hater, meanie, or bully.

I actually did stop helping people.

I haven't seen Jonnythan around much either

He either got fed up or collected too many strikes. It is a shame. He is a brilliant man.

I'm assuming (hoping) that Sarauk and SideSteel are just too busy right now - especially with their forum. Which was a brilliant idea and something that more of the experienced users should try.

I get an urge to start a thread with the request to provide your interpretation of the words:
Meanie
Bully
Hater

But you don't get to accuse anyone unless you post examples from the forums. Wonder how it would develop...

I don't think many people even know what the meaning of these words are.

Just disagreeing with someone, even if it's dangerous, and you get thrown into the lions den, for being a hater and rude.

Can I ask why people keep trying to help others here? I enjoy helping new people, but really the "you suck and are a mean hater for disagreeing with my 500 calorie a day juice cleanse" is really frustrating. Demotivating when it comes to helping new people, and I haven't been trying that long. Some of you have been here slugging through the trenches for a long time. You are articulate, thoughtful and helpful.

I'm probably being overly sensitive (obviously, I am) but what's the point in trying to help others when they backhand you for it?

A few people have directly informed me that the advice I've given them has been spot on. Others have done the contrary. As long as I feel there is even one person out there, who might find just what they needed to hear in what I had to say, I will keep posting. I admire those, who have been around much longer, because it takes a certain kind of teflon skin not to be bothered by the insulting insinuations that one is a hater, meanie, or bully.

I actually did stop helping people.

I haven't seen Jonnythan around much either

He either got fed up or collected too many strikes. It is a shame. He is a brilliant man.

I'm assuming (hoping) that Sarauk and SideSteel are just too busy right now - especially with their forum. Which was a brilliant idea and something that more of the experienced users should try.

Just got word jonnythan is in med school! Busy, not banned!

Juicing is indeed stupid. Kudos.

I happen to like juicing iykwim.

It's not bullying if it's a situation where an adult can walk away without real life consequences.

That is probably the most direct and succient definition of bullying I've ever seen. Well done.

Yeah, being bullied is when you are in a situation you cannot walk away from without consequence and you are bein coerced.

That does not exist here.

Good thing the authorities don't view the definition of bullying as "a situation you cannot walk away from without consequence."

You are probably thinking about the cases of Facebook bullying that resulted in a couple of suicides.

Let me be clear for you. Those were situations in which people purposefully when after people and in ways above and beyond being mean. That is not the same as calling someone stupid, refuting their arguments, etc. To draw a parallel for MFP, a person would need to constantly follow a person around the forums, message them constantly, and circumvent any ignoring/blocking that the "bullied" user put in place.

Actually, I was talking about bullying in general. Not what happens on Facebook or Twitter or whatever other social media sites people use these days.

And that's not the "bullying" I'm referring to.

Can you give a single example of an adult being "bullied"? Even a theoretical example.

A rapist who sues for custody of the child after it is born and then uses that custody to wield power over their victim.

dont worry, if you hang out here for six months, you will be exactly like all those 'hurtful' people lol

It's not bullying if it's a situation where an adult can walk away without real life consequences.

That is probably the most direct and succient definition of bullying I've ever seen. Well done.

Yeah, being bullied is when you are in a situation you cannot walk away from without consequence and you are bein coerced.

That does not exist here.

Good thing the authorities don't view the definition of bullying as "a situation you cannot walk away from without consequence."

You are probably thinking about the cases of Facebook bullying that resulted in a couple of suicides.

Let me be clear for you. Those were situations in which people purposefully when after people and in ways above and beyond being mean. That is not the same as calling someone stupid, refuting their arguments, etc. To draw a parallel for MFP, a person would need to constantly follow a person around the forums, message them constantly, and circumvent any ignoring/blocking that the "bullied" user put in place.

Actually, I was talking about bullying in general. Not what happens on Facebook or Twitter or whatever other social media sites people use these days.

And that's not the "bullying" I'm referring to.

Can you give a single example of an adult being "bullied"? Even a theoretical example.

A rapist who sues for custody of the child after it is born and then uses that custody to wield power over their victim.

I'd call that coercion but yeah I can see that as bullying as well. It fits the defination I agreed to as well, the victim there has no way of extricating themselves from the situation without losing their child which is unthinkable.

It's not bullying if it's a situation where an adult can walk away without real life consequences.

That is probably the most direct and succient definition of bullying I've ever seen. Well done.

Yeah, being bullied is when you are in a situation you cannot walk away from without consequence and you are bein coerced.

That does not exist here.

Good thing the authorities don't view the definition of bullying as "a situation you cannot walk away from without consequence."

You are probably thinking about the cases of Facebook bullying that resulted in a couple of suicides.

Let me be clear for you. Those were situations in which people purposefully when after people and in ways above and beyond being mean. That is not the same as calling someone stupid, refuting their arguments, etc. To draw a parallel for MFP, a person would need to constantly follow a person around the forums, message them constantly, and circumvent any ignoring/blocking that the "bullied" user put in place.

Actually, I was talking about bullying in general. Not what happens on Facebook or Twitter or whatever other social media sites people use these days.

And that's not the "bullying" I'm referring to.

Can you give a single example of an adult being "bullied"? Even a theoretical example.

A rapist who sues for custody of the child after it is born and then uses that custody to wield power over their victim.

I'd call that coercion but yeah I can see that as bullying as well. It fits the defination I agreed to as well, the victim there has no way of extricating themselves from the situation without losing their child which is unthinkable.

dont worry, if you hang out here for six months, you will be exactly like all those 'hurtful' people lol

:laugh: sooo true.

I get an urge to start a thread with the request to provide your interpretation of the words:
Meanie
Bully
Hater

But you don't get to accuse anyone unless you post examples from the forums. Wonder how it would develop...

I don't think many people even know what the meaning of these words are.

Just disagreeing with someone, even if it's dangerous, and you get thrown into the lions den, for being a hater and rude.

Can I ask why people keep trying to help others here? I enjoy helping new people, but really the "you suck and are a mean hater for disagreeing with my 500 calorie a day juice cleanse" is really frustrating. Demotivating when it comes to helping new people, and I haven't been trying that long. Some of you have been here slugging through the trenches for a long time. You are articulate, thoughtful and helpful.

I'm probably being overly sensitive (obviously, I am) but what's the point in trying to help others when they backhand you for it?

A few people have directly informed me that the advice I've given them has been spot on. Others have done the contrary. As long as I feel there is even one person out there, who might find just what they needed to hear in what I had to say, I will keep posting. I admire those, who have been around much longer, because it takes a certain kind of teflon skin not to be bothered by the insulting insinuations that one is a hater, meanie, or bully.

I actually did stop helping people.

That makes me sad, because you were one of the people I first appreciated here.

It was a combination of weariness of defending science against opinion based pseudoscience, it being a near thankless effort, and the site staff ignoring common sense suggestions that would have greatly benefitted new users and freed up the advice-givers to concentrate their efforts more efficiently. That and it seemed like they were sometimes directly working against established science and setting back our efforts.

I had a bit of a bittersweet experience with the Aspartame thread myself. Had to step away for a while.

I've had people jump on an idea I posted in a thread and rip it apart and gif post and "jump" on me.

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1297097-a-simple-thought-on-how-to-set-a-calorie-goal

So what. They didn't like the idea I posted. I explained it, they explained themselves, I got their point and decided to rephrase, we had a good laugh at it and that was that. I really don't see that as "bullying" or "hate"

If I had responded defensively I'm sure I would have gotten pilled on more...again though, that isn't bullying...that is people responding to your responses.

If you are an adult and you are on an internet forum and you claim to have been bullied I have to seriously question how overly sensitive you are.

Looks like you've got some big girl panties there.

A good number of people currently on my friends list got there by destroying one of my posts in an articulate manner.

It's not bullying if it's a situation where an adult can walk away without real life consequences.

That is probably the most direct and succient definition of bullying I've ever seen. Well done.

Yeah, being bullied is when you are in a situation you cannot walk away from without consequence and you are bein coerced.

That does not exist here.

Good thing the authorities don't view the definition of bullying as "a situation you cannot walk away from without consequence."

According to this site, adults can't be the victim of cyberbullying at all. They can be guilty of cyberharrassment, but only if they "repeatedly harass or threaten someone online."

https://www.wiredsafety.org/subjects/cyberbullying.php

I wouldn't consider any of the exchanges that have been discussed in this thread to fall under that guideline.

Can people be jerks? Sure. Are people on this website regularly "repeatedly harassing and threatening" other members? Not in my opinion. I'm not going to say it's never happened. But it certainly isn't common. And like Pikaknight said, there are moderators here who deal with that sort of thing.

It's not bullying if it's a situation where an adult can walk away without real life consequences.

That is probably the most direct and succient definition of bullying I've ever seen. Well done.

Yeah, being bullied is when you are in a situation you cannot walk away from without consequence and you are bein coerced.

That does not exist here.

Good thing the authorities don't view the definition of bullying as "a situation you cannot walk away from without consequence."

According to this site, adults can't be the victim of cyberbullying at all. They can be guilty of cyberharrassment, but only if they "repeatedly harass or threaten someone online."

https://www.wiredsafety.org/subjects/cyberbullying.php

I wouldn't consider any of the exchanges that have been discussed in this thread to fall under that guideline.

Can people be jerks? Sure. Are people on this website regularly "repeatedly harassing and threatening" other members? Not in my opinion. I'm not going to say it's never happened. But it certainly isn't common. And like Pikaknight said, there are moderators here who deal with that sort of thing.

Adults CAN be a victim of cyberbullying.

http://www.overcomebullying.org/cyberbullying.html