Drunk rant about women
Ferrous_Female_Dog
Posts: 221 Member
Last night one of my co-workers went on a drunk rant about women during happy hour. He's biased, of course. He's recently divorced and frustrated with the little dating he's done since then. He was going on about trust issues from this ex cheating, and then said women can't be trusted because they use make up and push up bras and those are lies, then he went on with hair dyeing and girdles and that it makes all women liars. We all laughed and it didn't really turn into a conversation but it did get me thinking.
That's something guys really have to deal with on the dating scene that women don't: the dressing up. If I were dating and on the first date the guy showed up wearing spanx to tuck a gut, shoes that made him seem 3 inches taller, and oh I don't know, let's say a really awesome convincing fake beard... I'd be kind of miffed to see him without the extras after expecting something different. Men don't do that though. They perform various levels of grooming, but with men, what you see is what you get. Many women, however, routinely change their hair color, wear heels, wear bras that change the shape of their breasts, we paint our faces, we can make our hair curly, straight, wavy, whatever we want!
Does this make us untrustworthy liars? I mean that's an extreme end of the spectrum but at least in my case it made me feel hypocritical to view a male who did similar things as, well misleading.
Make up and spanx and push up bras and excessive hair styling can be misleading, but can it also be unethical when taken to the extreme?
That's something guys really have to deal with on the dating scene that women don't: the dressing up. If I were dating and on the first date the guy showed up wearing spanx to tuck a gut, shoes that made him seem 3 inches taller, and oh I don't know, let's say a really awesome convincing fake beard... I'd be kind of miffed to see him without the extras after expecting something different. Men don't do that though. They perform various levels of grooming, but with men, what you see is what you get. Many women, however, routinely change their hair color, wear heels, wear bras that change the shape of their breasts, we paint our faces, we can make our hair curly, straight, wavy, whatever we want!
Does this make us untrustworthy liars? I mean that's an extreme end of the spectrum but at least in my case it made me feel hypocritical to view a male who did similar things as, well misleading.
Make up and spanx and push up bras and excessive hair styling can be misleading, but can it also be unethical when taken to the extreme?
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Replies
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No. I'm an artist- and artists need a full pallete to express themselves- and that means through make up clothes and shoes.
I am not dating at this point- but when I did- I always get dressed up and look nice- but I would say there is a difference between trying to look my best verses present an image of someone I'm not.
I don't really care what other people think or do past that.1 -
I don't know. I think a lot of women do it because they feel like they have to, not necessarily to impress men, but to compete with other women. I dye my hair sometimes, I wear makeup, I sometimes even wear really tall heels. I don't think it makes me dishonest. I think it means I felt like wearing it. I do think if a woman consistently wears image altering items and claims to be all natural, that's pretty misleading. I also think that if more women embraced what they looked like naturally, as opposed to what Cosmo tells them is beautiful, they might not feel like they had to do all that to be considered attractive.1
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I hide in the back and send out a 6ft hologram of myself. Does that count?2
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I guess I can kind of get where he is coming from. But on the same token, it is relatively obvious when a girl has a bunch of makeup on, 8 inch F-me pumps, and a push up bra. Guys can't honestly think they wake up looking like a $5 hooker, right?1
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While I understand what he's saying, it's very hard for me to not get angry at his comments.
Ever since I was about 12 years old, I've struggled with bad skin (although it is a million times better now than it used to be). That means that for the past 13 years, I've ALWAYS worn makeup. You know why? Because it makes me feel better about myself. I feel far more confident with makeup on than I do without it. Does doing something that makes me more confident make me dishonest? No. It means I'm doing something to make me feel better about myself.
I've also struggled with my hair. It's naturally curly, so it can be unruly at times, so sometimes I straighten it, and sometimes I don't. Does me straightening my hair on occasion make me dishonest? No. It means I like having hair that's easier to manage. And I dye it as well - does me lying about my natural hair colour make me dishonest? No. It means I like dying my hair to what suits me best.
And I like to wear clothes that compliment my body. Does me doing that mean I'm dishonest? No. It means I dress well for my figure.
According to your co-workers rant, we should all walk around naked all of the time, with zero makeup, zero hair products, men can never use rogain or get a hair transplant, no one should ever shave because our body hair is what's natural, and everyone over the age of 40 needs to never dye their hair and just accept that they're going gray.
That's ridiculous.
Based on what he said, I can see why he hasn't had much luck dating.1 -
I don't know. I think a lot of women do it because they feel like they have to, not necessarily to impress men, but to compete with other women. I dye my hair sometimes, I wear makeup, I sometimes even wear really tall heels. I don't think it makes me dishonest. I think it means I felt like wearing it. I do think if a woman consistently wears image altering items and claims to be all natural, that's pretty misleading. I also think that if more women embraced what they looked like naturally, as opposed to what Cosmo tells them is beautiful, they might not feel like they had to do all that to be considered attractive.
Yeah, I mean heels and make up are pretty standard and I think we all generally accept that. But there are some extreme make up techniques that can really make people look completely different. Heck, even when I wear compression shorts to the gym, it makes my body look completely different and I get more attention on my way to and from the gym than I do in regular clothes.0 -
I guess I can kind of get where he is coming from. But on the same token, it is relatively obvious when a girl has a bunch of makeup on, 8 inch F-me pumps, and a push up bra. Guys can't honestly think they wake up looking like a $5 hooker, right?
$5 ???0 -
According to your co-workers rant, we should all walk around naked all of the time, with zero makeup, zero hair products, men can never use rogain or get a hair transplant, no one should ever shave because our body hair is what's natural, and everyone over the age of 40 needs to never dye their hair and just accept that they're going gray.
That's ridiculous.
Based on what he said, I can see why he hasn't had much luck dating.
Well like I said, he was drunk and definitely biased. I don't agree with what he said, but I also don't think he meant people should abandon all grooming whatsoever.0 -
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I tuck a sock in my pants, to feel better about myself. I also tell women I'm a millionaire. I do these things for me, to feel better about myself as a person. If a woman thinks I'm being dishonest that's on her, I'm doing this for me. *hair flip*
:laugh:
Perfect.0 -
I tuck a sock in my pants, to feel better about myself. I also tell women I'm a millionaire. I do these things for me, to feel better about myself as a person. If a woman thinks I'm being dishonest that's on her, I'm doing this for me. *hair flip*
Ooh Sock in the pants! That's a good one!
Ladies, how do we feel about this? I think it's the male equivalent to a push up bra.0 -
I tuck a sock in my pants, to feel better about myself. I also tell women I'm a millionaire. I do these things for me, to feel better about myself as a person. If a woman thinks I'm being dishonest that's on her, I'm doing this for me. *hair flip*
Ooh Sock in the pants! That's a good one!
Ladies, how do we feel about this? I think it's the male equivalent to a push up bra.
I agree. If a guy had a sock in his pants and looked huge, then we made it home and his sock fell out of his boxers, I would be surprised.
But pushup bra or sock in your pants, whatever makes you feel better lol it's your prerogative.0 -
I also think that if more women embraced what they looked like naturally, as opposed to what Cosmo tells them is beautiful, they might not feel like they had to do all that to be considered attractive.
AMEN!0 -
I tuck a sock in my pants, to feel better about myself. I also tell women I'm a millionaire. I do these things for me, to feel better about myself as a person. If a woman thinks I'm being dishonest that's on her, I'm doing this for me. *hair flip*
Ooh Sock in the pants! That's a good one!
Ladies, how do we feel about this? I think it's the male equivalent to a push up bra.
since I don't' walk around staring at a man's crotch and guessing as to how fun his di*k might be- I'm not really seeing it on the same page.0 -
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I tuck a sock in my pants, to feel better about myself. I also tell women I'm a millionaire. I do these things for me, to feel better about myself as a person. If a woman thinks I'm being dishonest that's on her, I'm doing this for me. *hair flip*
Ooh Sock in the pants! That's a good one!
Ladies, how do we feel about this? I think it's the male equivalent to a push up bra.
since I don't' walk around staring at a man's crotch and guessing as to how fun his di*k might be- I'm not really seeing it on the same page.
I tend to agree with you but what about when men wear sweatpants?
My eye generally doesn't shoot to a guy's crotch but there's something about sweatpants that makes his package super obvious.
I can't be the only person who thinks that.0 -
I see nothing dishonest about makeup and bras, but extremes and constant spanx and such until he didn't know the actual shape of her body until the first time he sees her naked is another story.0
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Guy sounds a little bitter to me.0
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You really can't win on this one.
I personally do none of the above because I just don't enjoy it. Makes me feel...weird. Like I'm made of glass and if I trip false eyelashes will fly and heels will break.
Also out of laziness. Brushing my hair is what I consider getting ready for a night out.
However, like I said, you can't win. If you do wear makeup, push-up bras, heels, etc, then you're a fraud. If you don't a lot of men think you don't care about your appearance.
In my opinion a lot of men prefer a done up woman, they just like to whinge about it.
Think of the hot redhead from Mad Men. She is who she is because of the enhancements.0 -
Men used to wear a thing called a codpiece. And wigs. And makeup. That all changed with the industrial revolution. It seems that the fashion industry isn't going to let women customers go as easily. But if you look on the factory floor and even in the exec wing there isn't a lot of war paint going on at work any more. So why it's necessary on dates?
I'm reminded of a friend who was dating this woman and things got to the bedroom, eventually. As he put it, she looked great in clothes but once she took everything off everything else ...just...fell. She went from looking like 35 (which she was) to looking like 60+.
Maybe that's what your male friend was talking about. But then again, most of us do look better in clothes....0 -
I tuck a sock in my pants, to feel better about myself. I also tell women I'm a millionaire. I do these things for me, to feel better about myself as a person. If a woman thinks I'm being dishonest that's on her, I'm doing this for me. *hair flip*
Ooh Sock in the pants! That's a good one!
Ladies, how do we feel about this? I think it's the male equivalent to a push up bra.
since I don't' walk around staring at a man's crotch and guessing as to how fun his di*k might be- I'm not really seeing it on the same page.
What about when men wear sweatpants?
My eye generally doesn't shoot to a guy's crotch but there's something about sweatpants that makes his package super obvious.
I can't be the only person who thinks that.
LOL- it does make it more obvious- it's not just you- but I think part of that is they tend to go a little more lose and free- so I feel like a sock wouldn't work as well....
hadn't though of it much... You have to be really REALLY small for me to write you off in terms of bad sex... and yes- bad sex is a deal breaker.
but- my initial reaction is as follows
Me: I wouldn't be looking to date men who wear sweats to go out.
But Jo: what about the gym? that's a valid place to ear them
Me:I don't date people at my gym- that's a hard and fast rule- no dating at the gym
BUT jo... what if you're at his house
Me: I think if I'm at his house- and he's in sweats- I already know what his junk looks like.
But thinking more on it- I guess.... I'm not really overly concerned, as long as there is something to work with. I can only adapt so much- it's not going to get but so much smaller- and if you're so small I can't feel anything AT ALL- well then that's a problem...... but if he wants to pad up- go right ahead- if the sex is lame- he's over.
in terms of push ups bra's being dishonest- I feel like if men didn't put so much stock in how fabulous boobs were- we might not be so obsessed with making them bigger and higher- but that's kind of a chicken or the egg question- we'll never have a good answer.0 -
I have been on the online dating scene for a while now and my experience is that men 'lie' as much as women. Perfect example is a date I went on last February. I had reached my lowest weight (can't wait to get back there again) of 196lbs (after years of being over 300lbs this was low for me) and felt quite confident, had been out and got new jeans, was wearing slightly supportive underwear and a bit of make up (I don't wear much as I hate it). I was all set to meet this man who claimed he was 42, his profile photographs were of someone who obviously lived well but was in his 40s and made an effort...well when we actually met this was not the case. Turned out the photograph was over a decade and a bit old, he was as old as my mum, foul-mouthed and blatantly trying to keep his lies together. Had I known this going in I wouldn't have met him, but he used his photographs to hide his true self (so easy when online)...no amount of fake tan and hair dye (and yes he had) was going to hide the fact that he was old enough to be my father...So women are not the exclusive 'liars'...tbh though they can take me as they see me, only time I wear make up is for a job interview or a family event where I get no end of earache if I don't!0
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women can't be trusted because they use make up and push up bras and those are lies, then he went on with hair dyeing and girdles and that it makes all women liars.
I never wear more than mascara, a little eyeshadow and blush on the rare occasion I wear any makeup at all. I do not wear pushup bras or girdles and I don't dye my hair.
Wait ... I better go check because apparently I'm not really a woman ...0 -
in terms of push ups bra's being dishonest- I feel like if men didn't put so much stock in how fabulous boobs were- we might not be so obsessed with making them bigger and higher- but that's kind of a chicken or the egg question- we'll never have a good answer.
I totally agree with you here. It's both men and women who place such emphasis on breast size.
I have small breasts, but I've learned to be confident in myself with the help of my boyfriend (who happens to be most attracted to women with slightly bigger butts and smaller breasts, so hooray for me being his perfect woman!), so I don't feel the need to wear a push-up bra, but I feel like most girls aren't so lucky.0 -
I tuck a sock in my pants, to feel better about myself. I also tell women I'm a millionaire. I do these things for me, to feel better about myself as a person. If a woman thinks I'm being dishonest that's on her, I'm doing this for me. *hair flip*
why not a cucumber wrapped in tinfoil?
Does that go to 11 also?0 -
Yep.. women lie... men lie... people lie....
And on the internet I am a 6 ft tall willowy blonde......0 -
well you could argue that shaving (or trimming the shape of the beard) and wearing deodorant and manscaping is dishonest for the same reasons, i.e. unless you see him looking like a wild-haired, unwashed caveman he's being dishonest... I mean it's obvious that a woman's wearing make-up, and if he doesn't know that a bra (even a regular one) makes boobs a little more perky, then he must be incredibly naive. I mean, both genders work to make themselves presentable. Even cavemen and cavewomen would have done some sort of body modification, e.g. painting their bodies or plaiting their hair in weird ways (there's no known human culture that doesn't do some kind of body modification, and cutting your hair or trimming your beard comes under this category from an anthropological point of view).... so really, it's totally human to do this, and nothing wrong with it and precisely no-one is naive enough to think that any of these things represent what the person would look like after a week or two of no personal grooming whatsoever. And if your partner goes for 2 weeks with no personal grooming at all, then dishonesty is not the problem in the relationship...
that said, I do think people should be honest about these things, e.g. if you've dyed your hair then don't pretend it's your natural colour.0 -
no no no no no heres how it went down
1. create unrealistic, unattainable standards of beauty for women
2. build a multi-billion dollar beauty industry to sell women makeup and other products, tell them they are worthless without it
3. Mock women who wear makeup as vain and fake, mock women who don't as ugly
4. Code makeup as feminine, make the feminine shameful and embarrassing
5. complain that women look fake and you get what you see with men because they cant wear makeup
stay woke please3 -
Women are liars! Trying to appear appealing when in actuality they are just rotting inside. They should wear stoles of garbage and trash bags, weave fish fins into their hair to reflect their true inner hideousness!
Or . . . you know . . . they're people. Just people. Who happen to have vaginas.0 -
I tuck a sock in my pants, to feel better about myself. I also tell women I'm a millionaire. I do these things for me, to feel better about myself as a person. If a woman thinks I'm being dishonest that's on her, I'm doing this for me. *hair flip*
Oh ya... don't forget your "roommate" who is totally your mom!0
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