"You MUST send me a message if you want to be my friend"

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  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,229 Member
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    This isn't real life just so everyone knows.

    Many people on MFP actually meet up and hang out IRL.

    We're doing that again soon, right?

    Just so you all know, this chick is awesome! :drinker:
  • Myhaloslipped
    Myhaloslipped Posts: 4,317 Member
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    I only add girls who have developed an ED and are in that "sweet spot" where they aren't bulky like some of the girls who like to lift weight but also aren't so super thin that I fear they might break. Just the right amount of thin and daddy issues. Also they have to be between 18-19. I don't need old girls on my friends list.

    This is kind of ****ty to say, as someone who recovered from an eating disorder. I know MFP isn't all lovey-huggy, but have a little bit of respect for the people who go through something ****ing awful every day of their life. Jesus. I can take a good joke but that just wasn't funny.

    This is a perfect example of why people should get to know each other a bit before sending a FR. Not everyone shares the same sense of humor. Also, he is actually a great guy and totally kidding. But you see my point.
  • Myhaloslipped
    Myhaloslipped Posts: 4,317 Member
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    This isn't real life just so everyone knows.

    Many people on MFP actually meet up and hang out IRL.

    We're doing that again soon, right?

    Just so you all know, this chick is awesome! :drinker:

    Yes, we had better be doing it again soon! :happy: :drinker:
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
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    This isn't real life just so everyone knows.

    Many people on MFP actually meet up and hang out IRL.

    We're doing that again soon, right?

    Just so you all know, this chick is awesome! :drinker:

    Yes, we had better be doing it again soon! :happy: :drinker:
    I need a trip to ATL soon!

    I have a couple friends here who I met on this site. We workout together and I went to one's wedding a few months ago.

    But now I think I imagined it.
  • CallMeCupcakeDammit
    CallMeCupcakeDammit Posts: 9,375 Member
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    This isn't real life just so everyone knows.

    Many people on MFP actually meet up and hang out IRL.

    TRUTH! :drinker:
  • da_bears1008
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    So I've stumbled on a few profiles of people with similar body type as me or just people around my age and have added a few as a friend. I've also noticed that some people have this *****IF YOU DON'T SEND ME A MESSAGE FIRST I WILL REJECT YOUR FRIEND REQUEST***** notice at the top of their profile. If you're one of those people that only adds users who you know in real life on this site as a friend, I totally understand, but I've always noticed that people have 200+ friends, and all of them are not from the same area. It's the internet. I'm not about to show up on your f*cking door step and creep in your windows, I just wanna look at your diary and check out your snacks. Does anyone else find this a little funny? Like do I really have to explain myself to be your "friend" on a website when I'm probably never going to meet you and just comment "great job" when you have a 500 calorie burn workout and have it motivate me to get up off my butt and walk around the block?

    Nobody is forcing you to send a message. I prefer a message because I don't accept friends by body type, more so, sarcasm type.
  • yopeeps025
    yopeeps025 Posts: 8,680 Member
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    I only add girls who have developed an ED and are in that "sweet spot" where they aren't bulky like some of the girls who like to lift weight but also aren't so super thin that I fear they might break. Just the right amount of thin and daddy issues. Also they have to be between 18-19. I don't need old girls on my friends list.

    This is kind of ****ty to say, as someone who recovered from an eating disorder. I know MFP isn't all lovey-huggy, but have a little bit of respect for the people who go through something ****ing awful every day of their life. Jesus. I can take a good joke but that just wasn't funny.

    This is a perfect example of why people should get to know each other a bit before sending a FR. Not everyone shares the same sense of humor. Also, he is actually a great guy and totally kidding. But you see my point.

    I really do not know what the guy was talking about MFP not being real world. I do know that ED comment would mostly likely not be said in real life. Although he was joking on MFP right? It like that MOD who joked about Domestic violence with a disclaimer that came with it yesterday.
  • Myhaloslipped
    Myhaloslipped Posts: 4,317 Member
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    This isn't real life just so everyone knows.

    Many people on MFP actually meet up and hang out IRL.

    We're doing that again soon, right?

    Just so you all know, this chick is awesome! :drinker:

    Yes, we had better be doing it again soon! :happy: :drinker:
    I need a trip to ATL soon!

    I have a couple friends here who I met on this site. We workout together and I went to one's wedding a few months ago.

    But now I think I imagined it.

    Yes, you need to get up here!
  • SrMaggalicious
    SrMaggalicious Posts: 495 Member
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    alot on here, like to make it a big deal....like they want you beggin to be your friend....................and then they won't say **** to ya.......but they want all the attention.......they want you coming to their page..............too much work for them to come to your page..................as you say....only takes a few seconds..............lmao......so many attention getters on here..............
    but there are a couple of handfuls of good people on here..............but mostly the women want to show their *kitten* or tits.....and the dudes want to flex their muscles...............majority of them won't show their face.......lol hiding from their spouse or their that damn ugly

    WUT?

    let me translate:
    ".......................................................................
    ..........................
    .............................................................................................
    ...................................................
    ...
    .......
    ......................................................!"

    got it?
  • lngbrd
    lngbrd Posts: 279 Member
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    So if I send friend requests with a message that says" I want to creep your pics" is that acceptable?
  • Myhaloslipped
    Myhaloslipped Posts: 4,317 Member
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    alot on here, like to make it a big deal....like they want you beggin to be your friend....................and then they won't say **** to ya.......but they want all the attention.......they want you coming to their page..............too much work for them to come to your page..................as you say....only takes a few seconds..............lmao......so many attention getters on here..............
    but there are a couple of handfuls of good people on here..............but mostly the women want to show their *kitten* or tits.....and the dudes want to flex their muscles...............majority of them won't show their face.......lol hiding from their spouse or their that damn ugly

    Well aren't you a peach!
  • SammyKel12
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    LOL....hehehe
  • Shalaurise
    Shalaurise Posts: 707 Member
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    This isn't real life just so everyone knows.

    How is it not real life? I'm real. You're real. Everyone on my friend list is real. The words I type are real. The conversations we have are real. Does the fact that the internet is facilitating our conversations somehow change these facts? Does that mean that telephone calls are also not real life? Emails? When does one cross this fictional boundary between real-life and not real-life?

    The things you do and say online are just as real as anywhere else. Arguably more so, since if you do something that garners sufficient attention online it never, ever, goes away.

    The people on my friend list are actually friends. Not just random strangers I accepted as entries in a database flagged 'friend'. There's not a one of them I wouldn't meet in person and get a drink with. I like them. I like what they have to say. A quick message with your friend request just helps me decide if you are likely to be someone I'll enjoy interacting with. Likewise when I send a friend request, I'll briefly describe why I think we'll enjoy being friends. Sometimes it doesn't workout, and I'll drop someone from my list, or they'll drop me from their's. No hard feelings, some people just aren't compatible.

    If you would like to curate your friend list in a different way, that's fine too. None of my business. I literally couldn't care less. Just don't go around pretending like yours is the one true method and everyone else's ideas are obviously crazy.

    It never goes away? Unless you are a mod and just delete the whole thread. Then it is just a rumor. :p

    I'm sure someone screen grabbed it and is keeping it safe for future use.

    Lies! It was Photoshoped. That is sooo no real. ;)
  • ActuarialChef
    ActuarialChef Posts: 1,413 Member
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    "Hey, I was really inspired by your forum posts, can we be friends?"
    "I'd love to see your journey and hopefully motivate each other."
    "Your GIF was awesome, got anymore?"
    "You're a meanie, and I appreciate your brutal honesty."

    It doesn't even have to be something flattering (boo to all of you saying this is about narcissism). If we have a similar sense of humor or life philosophy or heck, I think I sent a FR to someone once because she was an English teacher and I liked her personality and I thought we'd get along.

    It's all about, "Are we compatible?" not, "why do you think I'm awesome?"

    Seriously, I'd rather hear "I think we share a sense of humor" than "I think you're inspiring." The latter is way too much pressure anyway.

    How about the awkward way I propositioned you? "Um, I really like the look of your baked goods and would like to see more of them" or at least that's how I remember it. :flowerforyou:

    I used to put cupcakes as my avatar, which I changed based on holiday/season. That got me alot of FR's! haha. Cause seriously... cupcakes!

    Today is my husband's birthday and I have Reese's Peanut Butter Cupcakes cooling on the counter before I frost them. :happy:

    Can I be your friend too? We have mutual friends! And I love cupcakes!

    Edit: I totally just added you. I even included a message in the request :flowersforyou:
  • Cliffslosinit
    Cliffslosinit Posts: 5,044 Member
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    I think in short it comes down to respect.
    If they ask for a message, send them one.

    I have quite a few on my FL.
    I would love to add some of the friends they have just because I love their wit and sarcasm.
  • odusgolp
    odusgolp Posts: 10,477 Member
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    So I've stumbled on a few profiles of people with similar body type as me or just people around my age and have added a few as a friend. I've also noticed that some people have this *****IF YOU DON'T SEND ME A MESSAGE FIRST I WILL REJECT YOUR FRIEND REQUEST***** notice at the top of their profile. If you're one of those people that only adds users who you know in real life on this site as a friend, I totally understand, but I've always noticed that people have 200+ friends, and all of them are not from the same area. It's the internet. I'm not about to show up on your f*cking door step and creep in your windows, I just wanna look at your diary and check out your snacks. Does anyone else find this a little funny? Like do I really have to explain myself to be your "friend" on a website when I'm probably never going to meet you and just comment "great job" when you have a 500 calorie burn workout and have it motivate me to get up off my butt and walk around the block?

    Not that i read all 9 pages, but for me...


    Adding me without a peep or any prior interaction in order to look at my diary and check out my snacks is the equivalent of a creepy dude coming in my house and looking in my garbage to see if I'm on the rag or if I ate a twinkie today.


    Respectify.
  • Legs_McGee
    Legs_McGee Posts: 845 Member
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    I want to know what we have in common. Are you a runner? Are you funny? Do you think I'm funny? Can we be funny together?

    Compliments work too.
  • Ninkyou
    Ninkyou Posts: 6,666 Member
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    "Hey, I was really inspired by your forum posts, can we be friends?"
    "I'd love to see your journey and hopefully motivate each other."
    "Your GIF was awesome, got anymore?"
    "You're a meanie, and I appreciate your brutal honesty."

    It doesn't even have to be something flattering (boo to all of you saying this is about narcissism). If we have a similar sense of humor or life philosophy or heck, I think I sent a FR to someone once because she was an English teacher and I liked her personality and I thought we'd get along.

    It's all about, "Are we compatible?" not, "why do you think I'm awesome?"

    Seriously, I'd rather hear "I think we share a sense of humor" than "I think you're inspiring." The latter is way too much pressure anyway.

    How about the awkward way I propositioned you? "Um, I really like the look of your baked goods and would like to see more of them" or at least that's how I remember it. :flowerforyou:

    I used to put cupcakes as my avatar, which I changed based on holiday/season. That got me alot of FR's! haha. Cause seriously... cupcakes!

    Today is my husband's birthday and I have Reese's Peanut Butter Cupcakes cooling on the counter before I frost them. :happy:

    Can I be your friend too? We have mutual friends! And I love cupcakes!

    Edit: I totally just added you. I even included a message in the request :flowersforyou:

    Totally! Cupcakes are win! Ice cream are win! All the foods (except cauliflower,etc.) are win!
  • FrozenSongBird
    FrozenSongBird Posts: 3,892 Member
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    Who cares how someone else wants to filter their friends list?

    I don't see how taking 1 minute of your time to write someone a little hi im so and so, is an inconvenience.. don't want to than move on.
  • Galatea_Stone
    Galatea_Stone Posts: 2,037 Member
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    I'm fickle. I might add you or I might not. If you want the odds in your favor, type a couple words. Or be really, really hot and funny and NOT creepy.

    It's not that I think I'm special, but I have to have some way to decide on friend requests. I send a message or a PM every dang time, even if they don't have a disclaimer. It's not a lot to ask.