Pooping at work

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Replies

  • odusgolp
    odusgolp Posts: 10,477 Member
    A co-worker shared with me yesterday (because I walked into her office and she had JUST farted) that there is a product called Just One Drop that, as she put it, will allow you to do "everything you need to do and walk away clean & fresh".

    Apparently it is eucalyptus oil. You put a drop in the toilet pre-poop and it keeps the room fresh post-poop.

    *Sigh* The *kitten* we talk about around here.

    I'm trying this tonight... I'll drink some milk or something to ensure a "full blown" test.
  • CallMeCupcakeDammit
    CallMeCupcakeDammit Posts: 9,377 Member
    I used to measure the time by how many screens of Angry Birds I could clear. Then one time my legs went numb and I could barely walk out. Now I just read the forums on MFP.

    That's what happens to me when I'm MFPooping, my legs fall asleep. Then I have to stand there holding onto the wall until I can walk again. I only do that at home, though. I usually have to poop while I'm still at work. Two women, two stalls, and it's like we have an unwritten rule that we do not go in there at the same time.
  • DamePiglet
    DamePiglet Posts: 3,730 Member
    Did anyone mention the ol' courtesy flush?
  • Mainebikerchick
    Mainebikerchick Posts: 1,573 Member
    We have a designated pooping stall at work, all the way down at the end so you can do your business in peace!!! :laugh:
  • spicy618
    spicy618 Posts: 2,114 Member
    We have a designated pooping stall at work, all the way down at the end so you can do your business in peace!!! :laugh:

    That's how it works at my job also. If you enter and the last stall is occupied and the others aren't, proceed at your own risk. :laugh:

    I also poo at work.:ohwell: I'm not good at holding it in. However, I do have my own can of Febreeze and use it frequently. :blushing:

    On the other hand, my boyfriend can NOT poop at work and he is a morning pooper. Therefore, if he misses his poop at home, he will hold it All Day or at least until lunchtime. :noway: I don't know how he does it. :laugh:
  • patrickblo13
    patrickblo13 Posts: 831 Member
    I work with all guys...so I just drop loads
  • asdowe13
    asdowe13 Posts: 1,951 Member
    I let my coworkers know when i go to poop at work, both times, everyday.

    1) everybody poops
    2) getting paid to poop
    3) free TP
    3) my wife likes it better this way
    4) sometimes you get into a poop orr with the other stalls, loudest, wettest, grossest it all pretty hilarious
  • Crucifry
    Crucifry Posts: 30 Member
    DUMPANY. Just no.
  • melmelw80
    melmelw80 Posts: 352 Member
    My desk is in very close proximity to the bathroom. I personally hate it when people do the deed at work....
    ***sprays Lysol
  • Candi_land
    Candi_land Posts: 1,311 Member
    IDGAF, but I do prefer to use the handicapped bathroom because it has a sink and when I poop I like to leave water running. The sound is calming for my butt hole.
  • JoRocka
    JoRocka Posts: 17,525 Member
    What else would you be doing in there? Squats? :P
    doing personal pleasure buisness- least I think that was what that thread was about



    I prefer to do so in silence- but I just go- I'll make a few small noises to but I"m not rattling around out there like Harry and the Hendersons.

    I do use the scale before and after if I can- I'm a child- yes I know.

    My co-worker and I have a running joke- where we walk back into the cubicle stretch our hands over head and look super satisfied and go- yeah I totally lost another 5 pounds today.

    :happy:

    like I said- a child.

    Also- that poo-porrei stuff (my friend has a different brand) either way- *kitten* is amazing- pun totally intended.
  • No_Finish_Line
    No_Finish_Line Posts: 3,661 Member
    thank God i'm a man
  • mmm_drop
    mmm_drop Posts: 1,126 Member
    We have a designated pooping stall at work, all the way down at the end so you can do your business in peace!!! :laugh:

    LOL. At my previous place of employment we had two row of stalls. Row 2 was specifically used for #2.

    As for stealthy or not GAF?

    The latter. I crack up when I'm in the bathroom and someone is in there *not* going because I'm in there. I call them poop standoffs.
  • SuperVixen2B
    SuperVixen2B Posts: 218 Member
    We have a designated pooping stall at work, all the way down at the end so you can do your business in peace!!! :laugh:

    LOL. At my previous place of employment we had two row of stalls. Row 2 was specifically used for #2.

    As for stealthy or not GAF?

    The latter. I crack up when I'm in the bathroom and someone is in there *not* going because I'm in there. I call them poop standoffs.

    Relevant username.
  • dnfenton
    dnfenton Posts: 24 Member
    You know whats better than getting paid to poop at work.........getting paid OVERTIME to poop at work.
  • redromad275
    redromad275 Posts: 884 Member
    I have no issue at work. In fact if I hear someone I know come into a stall nearby, I will text them. "whatcha doin?" hilarious!
  • Butrovich
    Butrovich Posts: 410 Member
    As for me, my weird bathroom pet peeve is when someone gets in the stall RIGHT NEXT TO YOU when there are others open. How about if we don't do our business like 5 inches from each other?
    Seriously! This applies to urinals as well. We have 3 in our work bathroom. Common code is no one should use that middle one unless the two on the end are already taken or there is a baby on fire in the middle urinal.

    Or shut down the entire bathroom by only using the middle urinal, thereby making everyone afraid to use the other two.
  • JojoW8183
    JojoW8183 Posts: 540 Member
    Poop? I don't poop. Well actually the only place I poop is at work, early in the morning, before anyone's used the restroom. If someone comes in, I can't go. I don't poop at home, my husband teases me endlessly about it, but I just can't. If I do have to, it's when he's asleep. :ohwell:
  • Velum_cado
    Velum_cado Posts: 1,608 Member
    My main goal in life is to find a secret, never-used bathroom at work, like George Costanza's.
  • Bella0531
    Bella0531 Posts: 309 Member
    Thankfully, my office has single toilet bathrooms with locking doors!! I don't mind getting paid to poo!
  • sofaking6
    sofaking6 Posts: 4,589 Member
    I just hate it when someone else in the bathroom is a Poop Ghost. That's when the person tries to pretend like they're not even there anytime someone else is in the bathroom. They get really quiet, don't move, and try to hold it in until you leave. The problem is that you totally know that they're there because they aren't invisible and no one can be that quiet. That means that the other person is just awkwardly trying to go about their potty business like they don't see your shoes there under the stall. Plus, sometimes you don't see the shoes and just hear a random noise that scares the poo out of you (literally?).

    What if person number two also has to go number two? What then? Does the first person continue to Poop Ghost the whole time? That is so uncomfortable. How am I supposed to go with you going all Moaning Myrtle on me in the next stall? I mean, really.

    Poop Ghost has dibs. If you have to pee, make it snappy, wash your hands and GTFO. If you've got to go #2, give up, GTFO and give 'em 30 before trying again. If it can't wait...break the ice.


    That's exactly right. We have only two stalls and plenty of females, too.
  • Angimom
    Angimom Posts: 1,463 Member
    Funny *kitten*!
  • KeithAngilly
    KeithAngilly Posts: 575 Member
    in to have this on my timeline...


    When I was in the basic training, we had no stalls. The "bathroom" was also the laundry room and there was a shower room just to the side, which had pipe going across with 4 shower heads attached (also no stalls). So, yeah, I can pretty much poop anywhere. :wink:
  • MinnieInMaine
    MinnieInMaine Posts: 6,400 Member
    I'm a shy pooper, I like my privacy. Because of this, I'd rather not poo at work but sometimes you just gotta go and in those cases, I too become a stealth pooper. I try to find whichever bathroom is empty but if the urge is too strong I just go in and try to time my courtesy flushes to cover the noise.
  • TheBrolympus
    TheBrolympus Posts: 586 Member
    Yes, this needs to be on my timeline.

    I can poop anywhere and have feel no need to conceal what I am doing. It's a bathroom, there are really only 2 reasons to be in there.
    1) pee
    2) read while pooping.
  • TheBrolympus
    TheBrolympus Posts: 586 Member
    Also, If you are in the stall next to me, it becomes a competition. You're going down Mr. IThinkICanPoopLouderThanYou!!!
  • Myhaloslipped
    Myhaloslipped Posts: 4,317 Member
    Barbara poo-poo, wtf? That made my day. :laugh:
  • jessiruthica
    jessiruthica Posts: 412 Member
    I don't try to hide noises or intentions in the bathroom at work. That's why I'm in the bathroom in the first place!

    Actually, what bothers me more is people who use the bathroom like an office. Do you really need to take a phone call in here? Because I'm NOT going to keep it quiet for you!
  • prestigio
    prestigio Posts: 181 Member
    I can´t believe this has not been posted yet...
    resized_success-kid-meme-generator-poop-at-work-get-paid-for-it-898898.jpg

    Pretty bad scaling though :(
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
    I don't GAF. As a matter of fact, I will use the handicapped stall, when available, so I can grab the rail and focus.

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