"I want to lose weight, but I don't want to get too skinny!"
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Malteaster wrote: »I think that although people may claim to have a goal weight above normal BMI, once they get there they will reconsider and reduce their goal downwards.
I also think if you have a lot of weight to lose it is hard to visualise what you will look like at goal, and perhaps they imagine that they will look borderline anorexic.
This is a fascinating topic.
Why? BMI was never meant to be used on an individual basis - it was meant for population analysis
It is no sign of how healthy I am as an individual
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Before kids I did look emaciated with a BMI of 20.7, and I was told so by many close friends who became concerned about me when I lost ~40 pounds in a VERY short amount of time. After having my first child I found that a BMI of 23.4 was a nice spot for me. I can point out the ways in which my body changed after having my second child though. Prior I was unable to wear women's pants because I had no discernible hips, now they fit me quite well. The changes in my body also make me wonder what BMI I feel will I look decent at.
I'm not trying to be 18 year old me again, because I know that is not the body type I have anymore. Not that I'm offended by not having to shop in the juniors section either. I'm aiming for that BMI of 23.4, but if I get close and decide that I'm happy with myself and my labs show that I'm doing fine then I'll go into maintenance at that point.0 -
I have lost over 100 pounds, and do fear of being to skinny, but I am right in the middle of my "normal" range so I am working on increase lean tissue and decreasing body fat percentages more than weight loss..
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Ok here is a personal example with photo because I understand the whole "too skinny" thing in my own way. Can anyone guess what I weigh in this picture? *Note: The front of that dress flows away from my body as well.
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Calliope610 wrote: »Calliope610 wrote: »Calliope610 wrote: »OP, you are asking for opinions regarding being "skinny", which as I mentioned, is an arbitrary term. In order to better understand your question, perhaps you could supply the responders with a quantitative definition of "skinny" so we can better answer you.
I thought she was pretty clear in the o.p.
I read the OP, please point out the definition of "skinny", as I seem to have missed it. Thank you.
she seems to say that some people define "skinny" as being below the top end of bmi for normal.
People then define "skinny" based on their individual frame of reference or perspective. It's kinda like asking someone what "rich" or "wealthy" means. The answer differs due to different perspectives.
yes, i understand that. i think the op was asking about the specific people who define too skinny for them as being within the normal bmi range.0 -
MsHarryWinston wrote: »Ok here is a personal example with photo because I understand the whole "too skinny" thing in my own way. Can anyone guess what I weigh in this picture? *Note: The front of that dress flows away from my body as well.
how tall are you? impossible to say without a height. that picture probably doesn't show enough to say regardless though.
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amyrebeccah wrote: »Since I can tell that you and your friend seem to prefer being more at the underweight end, perhaps I can shed light on why I prefer to be in the middle or at the high end of my "ideal" weight.
You can "tell"? HAHAHAHAHA!
I'm a man and for my height, current body fat level, and frame size I'd need to be in the 130s before I was on the "underweight end" of things. Which, I assure you, is not my goal, even with my attempts be in the 10% BF range. Lady take a seat.-1 -
MsHarryWinston wrote: »Ok here is a personal example with photo because I understand the whole "too skinny" thing in my own way. Can anyone guess what I weigh in this picture? *Note: The front of that dress flows away from my body as well.
how tall are you? impossible to say without a height. that picture probably doesn't show enough to say regardless though.
Sorry forgot to say I'm 5'7, my bad.0 -
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Malteaster wrote: »I think that although people may claim to have a goal weight above normal BMI, once they get there they will reconsider and reduce their goal downwards.
I also think if you have a lot of weight to lose it is hard to visualise what you will look like at goal, and perhaps they imagine that they will look borderline anorexic.
This is a fascinating topic.
Why? BMI was never meant to be used on an individual basis - it was meant for population analysis
It is no sign of how healthy I am as an individual
Why use bmi as an initial goal? Because it is a general starting point. It is nice to have a vague idea of where you're headed when starting to lose weight.
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My point is though that in that pic I'm 5'7 and about 160-165 lbs puting me in the "overweight" category of BMI. Does that look overweight to you? At that time you could also see 4-pack definition. So when I personally say I want to get down to 160 because I don't want too look too skinny, sure it sounds odd when for my hight "normal" is 130-150. But seriously? Taking another 30 pounds off of me in that pic? I'm I would NOT look healthy, I would in fact look too skinny.
So while people may pick a weight in the "overweight" category it doesn't always really mean they are "overweight", you know?0 -
People who have never been thin have no idea what a healthy weight actually looks like (on themselves).Iwishyouwell wrote: »OK, this has always intrigued me because I've seen in on just about every weight loss or fitness board I've ever even cursorily passed through.
Overweight and obese people setting goals that are still pretty high, or are right at the high end of the "normal" scale, with a disclaimer of "I don't want to be skinny!!!".
Why do you think that is? What's with this apparent fear of becoming too low in body fat and/or weight? Many of the weights I see where people believe they will, or did, look too skinny/thin/emaciated use to be commonplace, average and normal a few decades ago (or in parts of the world today). Yet there seems to be this apparent backlash these days about conceptualizing a body that's relatively lean or light.
What do you think is the root of the big thin scare?
Also, you get people telling you that you look anorexic when you don't because they aren't used to seeing you at a normal weight. So they take that to heart.
I'm 5'3" and I went from 166 to 132 -- still a good 20 pounds heavier than my weight for most of my life and a perfectly healthy weight (and really I had a good 15 pounds more to lose at the time) and my mother -- who had known me at 102 pounds -- accused me of being anorexic due to my size and not the length of time it took to get there. I was eating plenty of food and even now looking back at photos, I looked healthy and good.
But I don't listen to crap like that. I knew I wasn't anorexic and I liked how I looked so I laughed at her then ate a huge sub right in front of her and she shut up. :-)
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CupcakeCrusoe wrote: »I personally set my goal at the high range of normal bmi because I have never, ever, been normal bmi in my life. Except as you know, an infant and small child.
I will re-evaluate when I get to normal bmi. I think a lot of people do.
This is exactly what I plan to do.
My first goal is for the very top end of healthy BMI (my priority is my health) - this seemed a very long way away when I started.
When I get there I'll work out how much leeway I want and want appearance changes I want.0 -
Calliope610 wrote: »I find it interesting that OP is questioning the validity of others personal choices and preferences, yet her avatar states "Do what works for you, not everyone else."
I find it interesting that not once in this thread have I questioned the validity of anybody's goals.
I asked for views about an overall shift in perspective regarding what we, collectively, consider thin/skinny. Wondering why sizes, weights, shapes that were considered common and normal just a few decades are now often categorized as too skinny, or emaciated, or inappropriate. Why do so many of us who have weight issues, hell many who never really did, suddenly consider ourselves as automatically being at the larger end of normal when the previous generations didn't.
It's interesting that a couple of you seem to seriously feel attacked by the mere exploration of this phenomenon. I couldn't care less where you personally set your goal. If you find this line of conversation so offensive, you are quite welcome to move along.0 -
I find it strange too. People claim to have different body types though and claim to be more muscular naturally whereas they look emaciated at a low weight, but I do wonder if they are fooling themselves. Without purposely lifting weights to bulk up, I question if they are right. I look best at the low end of the bmi scale or a little underweight according to bmi.
I look fine at the top end of my healthy BMI, but I'm not scared of getting smaller.
image sharing
My BMI was 24.9 in this pic. This was after 2 kids (I've had a 3rd now and am getting back to this size) but when I was this size in my 20s, my BMI was about 23. Strength training makes a difference
If you've never been thin before, you can't imagine how you'd look, and it must be weird. I've never heard anyone worry about getting too thin though.0 -
Iwishyouwell wrote: »OK, this has always intrigued me because I've seen in on just about every weight loss or fitness board I've ever even cursorily passed through.
Overweight and obese people setting goals that are still pretty high, or are right at the high end of the "normal" scale, with a disclaimer of "I don't want to be skinny!!!".
Why do you think that is? What's with this apparent fear of becoming too low in body fat and/or weight? Many of the weights I see where people believe they will, or did, look too skinny/thin/emaciated use to be commonplace, average and normal a few decades ago (or in parts of the world today). Yet there seems to be this apparent backlash these days about conceptualizing a body that's relatively lean or light.
What do you think is the root of the big thin scare?
I'm lean, but I'm not "skinny"...nor would I want to be "skinny." I'm by no means a muscular body builder type...but at my current weight I'm "overweight" by BMI standards...even though I'm 16-17% BF. At the very highest end of the BMI scale for my stats, I'm at about 10-12% BF...very lean. Why on earth would I should for anything lower than that...I'd have to burn up a bunch of muscle just to hit some arbitrary BMI number that is largely irrelevant.
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And I'm going to pointMsHarryWinston wrote: »My point is though that in that pic I'm 5'7 and about 160-165 lbs puting me in the "overweight" category of BMI. Does that look overweight to you? At that time you could also start to see some 4-pack definition. So when I personally say I want to get down to 160 because I don't want too look too skinny, sure it sounds odd when for my hight "normal" is 130-150. But seriously? Taking another 30 pounds off of me in that pic? I'm I would NOT look healthy, I would in fact look too skinny.
So while people may pick a weight in the "overweight" category it doesn't always really mean they are "overweight", you know?
Yep, I totally get you. I'm 5'6" and in the photo in my profile where I have the blue shirt and the camera is in front of my face, I'm 162 if I remember right. In the pink tank, I think I was 158. The lowest weight in my weight range is something like 118 -- 40 pounds less! For me, that is too thin.
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DawnieB1977 wrote: »I find it strange too. People claim to have different body types though and claim to be more muscular naturally whereas they look emaciated at a low weight, but I do wonder if they are fooling themselves. Without purposely lifting weights to bulk up, I question if they are right. I look best at the low end of the bmi scale or a little underweight according to bmi.
I look fine at the top end of my healthy BMI, but I'm not scared of getting smaller.
image sharing
My BMI was 24.9 in this pic. This was after 2 kids (I've had a 3rd now and am getting back to this size) but when I was this size in my 20s, my BMI was about 23. Strength training makes a difference
If you've never been thin before, you can't imagine how you'd look, and it must be weird. I've never heard anyone worry about getting too thin though.
you look good in that pic. I also think that boob size and where you hold your weight matters a lot. I have tiny boobs at pretty much every weight and I am extreme pear shaped which is a bad look at a high bmi for me. I also had a double chin at 24.9 bmi and was bordering on a size 14. I really looked fat at 24.9 bmi. I didn't look like you at all. I also don't have muscles naturally which makes it worse. probably should lift.0 -
And in answer to OP - I believe at the beginning of my weight loss I probably said similar.
For me it was that having been very overweight for so long I couldn't relate to a small frame and couldn't picture myself ever getting there.
Setting my initial goal at the very top end of healthy made it feel more achievable, and more like the person I was used to being.
For me 'I don't want to be too skinny' wasn't anything to do with a specific look or weight, but more to do with 'I want to be healthy but I still want to be me'.
As I get closer and closer to healthy weight 'me' is changing in all kinds of ways so I think when I get to healthy I might want to keep going with a bit of a recomp (I like my slowly emerging muscles).
TL:DR? Fear of failure and unfamiliarity with slimness caused me to say similar things at the outset.0 -
CupcakeCrusoe wrote: »I personally set my goal at the high range of normal bmi because I have never, ever, been normal bmi in my life. Except as you know, an infant and small child.
I will re-evaluate when I get to normal bmi. I think a lot of people do.
This is my situation, as well. The last time I was normal to under weight was when I was a 5 week preemie baby.0
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