Online Dating

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Replies

  • Belle8312
    Belle8312 Posts: 2,151 Member
    tchell99 wrote: »
    Didn't meet online (this was when I was in college in the ealry 90s), but started dating a guy I worked with at a restaurant over a school break while living back home. He seemed kinda obsessed with his ex gf and had other indications of instability, so I was happy to return to school 3 states away after a few weeks and chalk it up to a fling. Then I started getting collect calls...from jail. [Um, does anyone know how freaking expensive those are, especially for a college student?] He'd been arrested for harassing his ex (I never really got the details on exact charges, but I suspect battery and maybe assault) and wanted me to bail him out. He thought sending me a polaroid of him in his jail uniform would sway me. Nope. I cut off contact after two calls (what can I say, I felt bad at first, but then my sense kicked in).

    So then he started calling my Mom! She actually went down and put some $ in his commissary account. Luckily she saw the light once I told her some more details.

    That reminds me of someone's profile I read last night on OKC.....it said something like, I am currently writing you from whatever state prison and am sentenced for another 6 months. I got arrested for violating probation, blah, blah, blah, I am reformed and have found God, blah, blah, blah. And he further said that his friend suggested he sign up for it so he'll have someone to date when he gets out.
  • shajenkins88
    shajenkins88 Posts: 18 Member
    Don't trust online dating
  • tchell99
    tchell99 Posts: 434 Member
    edited February 2015
    Oh, I almost forgot the guy who stated outright that he saw no reason to *ever* pick up the tab, particularly for online dates, since too many women "expect" it. I certainly don't expect it - I really don't like feeling I owe anyone anything, so I always pay for myself unless they are really insistent and I don't want to make a big issue about it. And I abhor that some women see free drinks and meals as a dating entitlement. But then he started telling me stories of his various recent sexual exploits and then asked if I'd like to go get the next round. I said no thanks, I think one'll do me, polished off my drink, and left.

    Note: I did not leave him with the tab. I'd already bought my own drink at the bar before I sat down.
  • mscheftg
    mscheftg Posts: 485 Member
    mamasage wrote: »
    I've had my share of doozies but I think the worst was the guy who ordered mass amounts of cocktails and sushi, waiting until the end to inform me that he didn't have any money on him to contribute, and also, had spent the past eight years between a mental institution and jail. Then he asked "Can I come to your house and see where you sleep?"
    Ummmm. I'm gonna go with "no" on that one...

    I hope you took the long complicated way home!
  • Noelv1976
    Noelv1976 Posts: 18,948 Member
    I still do it
  • Lindsay_the_great
    Lindsay_the_great Posts: 209 Member
    I met the love of my life online. Before him I had met so many creeps and weirdos and philanderers that my profile had evolved to be very blunt and to the point about what I expected and was willing to put up with. Eventually I had enough. I went on one day after one too many creepy messages intending to delete my profile. Just as I was about to click the "delete" button a message popped up. It said, "Your profile reads like a manifesto."

    ...so four years later I married him.
  • RandomA1
    RandomA1 Posts: 19 Member
    LuvPosh wrote: »
    All of them, it usually starts with arriving and a male has yet again over estimated their height!

    One of my big pet peeves since I'm pretty tall as it is. Now, I just assume that they're 2 inches shorter than they listed and I'm usually right lol! Though the last guy I dated had a height listed that was about 1-2 inches shorter than his actual height.

  • RandomA1
    RandomA1 Posts: 19 Member
    Belle8312 wrote: »
    heathbilly wrote: »
    lol some damn , these are some horrible stories.

    Yeah, but I have heard some good ones. I only know 1 person that has had good luck, but you never know until you go out there and try.

    I just get frustrated at the amount of people I message and then don't get a response back. I actually spend time reading the profiles and message with something related to that...for example, found a guy a few days ago, good looking, seems nice, we "match" and he spent two weeks in Italy last year, posted pictures, talked about how he loved to travel, etc. I lived in Italy for four years, so I messaged him about what a beautiful country it was, how I liked some of his pics from the trip (I swear, it wasn't creepy), asked what country he wanted to travel to next, etc. Not one comment back.

    Frustrating.

    Very frustrating. I rarely message guys but when I do, this always seems to happen (even when they've "matched" me). It's not really like they're out of my league or anything either. I understand that guys have their own preferences but you would think that the odds of them answering would be pretty good since 90% of the guys I message already matched me.
  • stephaniels0416
    stephaniels0416 Posts: 38 Member
    RandomA1 wrote: »
    LuvPosh wrote: »
    All of them, it usually starts with arriving and a male has yet again over estimated their height!

    One of my big pet peeves since I'm pretty tall as it is. Now, I just assume that they're 2 inches shorter than they listed and I'm usually right lol! Though the last guy I dated had a height listed that was about 1-2 inches shorter than his actual height.

    I have this problem too. I'm 5'9", so height is important. Even if a guy says it doesn't matter that I'm taller, it doesn't take long before I hear, "too bad you're not just an inch or two shorter". So, my minimum is 5'10" and hope they only exaggerated by an inch.
  • wolfsbayne
    wolfsbayne Posts: 3,116 Member
    RandomA1 wrote: »
    Belle8312 wrote: »
    heathbilly wrote: »
    lol some damn , these are some horrible stories.

    Yeah, but I have heard some good ones. I only know 1 person that has had good luck, but you never know until you go out there and try.

    I just get frustrated at the amount of people I message and then don't get a response back. I actually spend time reading the profiles and message with something related to that...for example, found a guy a few days ago, good looking, seems nice, we "match" and he spent two weeks in Italy last year, posted pictures, talked about how he loved to travel, etc. I lived in Italy for four years, so I messaged him about what a beautiful country it was, how I liked some of his pics from the trip (I swear, it wasn't creepy), asked what country he wanted to travel to next, etc. Not one comment back.

    Frustrating.

    Very frustrating. I rarely message guys but when I do, this always seems to happen (even when they've "matched" me). It's not really like they're out of my league or anything either. I understand that guys have their own preferences but you would think that the odds of them answering would be pretty good since 90% of the guys I message already matched me.


    I'm guessing it's equally frustrating for the guys who don't receive messages back.

  • RandomA1
    RandomA1 Posts: 19 Member
    Joannah700 wrote: »
    Belle8312 wrote: »
    It wasn't a 'date'... but I have met up with a guy through Tinder. Luckily he looked exactly the same and had the same personality as he did online. I was 18 and he was 32- we got what we wanted out of it. I probably wouldn't do it again though. I was safe with this guy, but I don't want to ever chance it again.

    Is there anyone on Tinder that's actually looking for a real life relationship? From what I've gathered, it's all about hookups.

    No. You can date with Tinder. My little sister tried Tinder and met a rocket scientist. Seriously, a rocket scientist. He worked for Space X. She went to their Christmas party and had an awesome time.

    I think it depends on what you're looking for.

    I agree. My old coworker convinced me to try Tinder last year since a few of her friends had success finding relationships with it. I've used it on and off and met up with a guy from it 1 time. The date went ok but there wasn't a spark. I found Tinder to not be right for me because I'm definitely looking for a relationship and a large majority of the guys were looking for hookups or casual dating at most. It's definitely a confidence booster though lol. I had a lot of matches on it and most of them were pretty hot.
  • RandomA1
    RandomA1 Posts: 19 Member
    wolfsbayne wrote: »
    RandomA1 wrote: »
    Belle8312 wrote: »
    heathbilly wrote: »
    lol some damn , these are some horrible stories.

    Yeah, but I have heard some good ones. I only know 1 person that has had good luck, but you never know until you go out there and try.

    I just get frustrated at the amount of people I message and then don't get a response back. I actually spend time reading the profiles and message with something related to that...for example, found a guy a few days ago, good looking, seems nice, we "match" and he spent two weeks in Italy last year, posted pictures, talked about how he loved to travel, etc. I lived in Italy for four years, so I messaged him about what a beautiful country it was, how I liked some of his pics from the trip (I swear, it wasn't creepy), asked what country he wanted to travel to next, etc. Not one comment back.

    Frustrating.

    Very frustrating. I rarely message guys but when I do, this always seems to happen (even when they've "matched" me). It's not really like they're out of my league or anything either. I understand that guys have their own preferences but you would think that the odds of them answering would be pretty good since 90% of the guys I message already matched me.


    I'm guessing it's equally frustrating for the guys who don't receive messages back.

    Oh yes, it's 10 times for guys for sure so I shouldn't complain too much. I don't think I'd be able to do online dating if I was a guy because I don't think I'd be able to deal with the lack of replies.
  • wolfsbayne
    wolfsbayne Posts: 3,116 Member
    RandomA1 wrote: »
    wolfsbayne wrote: »
    RandomA1 wrote: »
    Belle8312 wrote: »
    heathbilly wrote: »
    lol some damn , these are some horrible stories.

    Yeah, but I have heard some good ones. I only know 1 person that has had good luck, but you never know until you go out there and try.

    I just get frustrated at the amount of people I message and then don't get a response back. I actually spend time reading the profiles and message with something related to that...for example, found a guy a few days ago, good looking, seems nice, we "match" and he spent two weeks in Italy last year, posted pictures, talked about how he loved to travel, etc. I lived in Italy for four years, so I messaged him about what a beautiful country it was, how I liked some of his pics from the trip (I swear, it wasn't creepy), asked what country he wanted to travel to next, etc. Not one comment back.

    Frustrating.

    Very frustrating. I rarely message guys but when I do, this always seems to happen (even when they've "matched" me). It's not really like they're out of my league or anything either. I understand that guys have their own preferences but you would think that the odds of them answering would be pretty good since 90% of the guys I message already matched me.


    I'm guessing it's equally frustrating for the guys who don't receive messages back.

    Oh yes, it's 10 times for guys for sure so I shouldn't complain too much. I don't think I'd be able to do online dating if I was a guy because I don't think I'd be able to deal with the lack of replies.

    I try to reply to all of them, but sometimes when you say you're not interested, it doesn't stick. So, after replying twice that I'm not interested, if they are persistent, I stop replying.

  • Noelv1976
    Noelv1976 Posts: 18,948 Member
    wolfsbayne wrote: »
    RandomA1 wrote: »
    wolfsbayne wrote: »
    RandomA1 wrote: »
    Belle8312 wrote: »
    heathbilly wrote: »
    lol some damn , these are some horrible stories.

    Yeah, but I have heard some good ones. I only know 1 person that has had good luck, but you never know until you go out there and try.

    I just get frustrated at the amount of people I message and then don't get a response back. I actually spend time reading the profiles and message with something related to that...for example, found a guy a few days ago, good looking, seems nice, we "match" and he spent two weeks in Italy last year, posted pictures, talked about how he loved to travel, etc. I lived in Italy for four years, so I messaged him about what a beautiful country it was, how I liked some of his pics from the trip (I swear, it wasn't creepy), asked what country he wanted to travel to next, etc. Not one comment back.

    Frustrating.

    Very frustrating. I rarely message guys but when I do, this always seems to happen (even when they've "matched" me). It's not really like they're out of my league or anything either. I understand that guys have their own preferences but you would think that the odds of them answering would be pretty good since 90% of the guys I message already matched me.


    I'm guessing it's equally frustrating for the guys who don't receive messages back.

    Oh yes, it's 10 times for guys for sure so I shouldn't complain too much. I don't think I'd be able to do online dating if I was a guy because I don't think I'd be able to deal with the lack of replies.

    I try to reply to all of them, but sometimes when you say you're not interested, it doesn't stick. So, after replying twice that I'm not interested, if they are persistent, I stop replying.
    We're slow sometimes.
  • zaxx1953
    zaxx1953 Posts: 389 Member
    Are people over like 25 actually on Tinder?

    I thought it was a bunch of college kids trying to hook up basically/.

    I am really glad not to be that into social media outside Twitter; it's a scary scary world of desperation and sadness, lol.
  • carlsonrobb
    carlsonrobb Posts: 914 Member
    This is the greatest thread up!!! I read it from start to finish!! Love the stories!! Please don't let this thread die!!!
  • jazzy550
    jazzy550 Posts: 264 Member
    Online dating is creepy! And it don't matter if it's a paid site or free. I was on for a while couldn't believe the lies and the crazy nuts I met! Most of them stay online forever as they can always find someone to give them what they want! It's gross!
  • kendall916
    kendall916 Posts: 4,222 Member
    edited February 2015
    Tried online dating -and still am. Have been on dates before but most of them fizzled out due to long distance or not the right chemistry. Still being hopeful.

    Oh and I've tried POF and okcupid. They're ok dating sites but you really need a critical eye to weed out those who are not a match for you. And you have to also be very patient if you're waiting for a response back if you're interested in a person.
  • kendall916
    kendall916 Posts: 4,222 Member
    I know this is going to sound immature (this is just a thought) but why not try online dating in MFP? There's a lot of good looking people and most of the people on here are very understanding and patient. :\
  • carlsonrobb
    carlsonrobb Posts: 914 Member
    I bet if there was a way to sort people close to you geographically it would happen more
  • Markdjones83
    Markdjones83 Posts: 852 Member
    kendall916 wrote: »
    I know this is going to sound immature (this is just a thought) but why not try online dating in MFP? There's a lot of good looking people and most of the people on here are very understanding and patient. :\

    I think some people do, but like carlson said most of my MFP friends don't even live close to me. A lot are married or taken already as well. A lot of women on here are also here strictly for fitness and might take offense to a little flirting :smile:
  • Lindsay_the_great
    Lindsay_the_great Posts: 209 Member
    kendall916 wrote: »
    I know this is going to sound immature (this is just a thought) but why not try online dating in MFP? There's a lot of good looking people and most of the people on here are very understanding and patient. :\

    I think some people do, but like carlson said most of my MFP friends don't even live close to me. A lot are married or taken already as well. A lot of women on here are also here strictly for fitness and might take offense to a little flirting :smile:

    Never hurts to try. Why not form a group if there isn't one already? Even if you meet someone who lives far away, you never know where things may lead.
  • Markdjones83
    Markdjones83 Posts: 852 Member
    I was actually thinking about setting up a get together with the DFW folks on my friends list. I have quite a few. Always nice to put faces to names
  • stephaniels0416
    stephaniels0416 Posts: 38 Member
    kendall916 wrote: »
    Oh and I've tried POF and okcupid. They're ok dating sites but you really need a critical eye to weed out those who are not a match for you. And you have to also be very patient if you're waiting for a response back if you're interested in a person.

    Some people need to learn this.

    I talked to a guy a couple of days ago that I wasn't interested in, but he actually put some thought into his first message, so I answered him. Last night he sent me a message asking how my weekend was going which I saw and responded to this morning. He answered with his email address talking about keeping in touch while he's out of town for work and meeting up when he gets back. Over the course of the next hour he sent the following series of messages: "Did I say something to offend you? If so, I'm sorry", "Please respond with something", "I guess I've been blocked, I didn't expect it to end so abruptly", and finally, "Nothing???" I wasn't even signed into the site.
  • Markdjones83
    Markdjones83 Posts: 852 Member
    Lol he is probably a bit like me. Read this to understand hahah

    http://www.puckermob.com/lifestyle/14-things-only-overthinkers-will-understand#close
  • Dragn77
    Dragn77 Posts: 810 Member
    edited February 2015
    zaxx1953 wrote: »
    Are people over like 25 actually on Tinder?

    I thought it was a bunch of college kids trying to hook up basically/.

    You'd be surprised!! Actually..I am! LoL! The most decent guys Ive ever met/talked to were from Tinder. (Im 38 btw)

    I have sworn off POF for LIFE! Its like the backwash of the online dating scene. I can't even...get into it.. Too many horror stories, the last guy pretty much turned me off POF forever.

    I have a lot of crazy stories, but the one that comes to mind is from several years ago, cant even remember what site I met him on... His profile said he was 5'10" and he was 35. In person...he was no more than 5' (guessing...he was about my daughters height and she was in the 4th grade at the time) and must have been at least 50. Im 5'10" btw, I was about 30 at the time, and I was wearing heels. To say I was not amused is an understatement.
  • stephaniels0416
    stephaniels0416 Posts: 38 Member
    Lol he is probably a bit like me. Read this to understand hahah

    http://www.puckermob.com/lifestyle/14-things-only-overthinkers-will-understand#close

    My grandma was an over thinker - everyone was always dead in a ditch somewhere because they weren't five minutes early. I have it to a degree in certain circumstances. Thankfully, it's not an all encompassing thing, I'd drive myself crazy, lol.
  • Markdjones83
    Markdjones83 Posts: 852 Member
    Yes, I just tell myself to calm down and let it go, sometimes easier said than done though hah
  • I_see_skinny_Me15
    I_see_skinny_Me15 Posts: 22 Member
    This one time... when I was newly single...I signed up for Plenty Of Fish. I met a guy online, we talked often, hit it off via text and phone, so we decided to meet for dinner. I should have known then that something was off...I paid for dinner and the tip AND we ended up going to a movie, which I also paid for. I stayed in town overnight but not with him, and he asked me to meet him for lunch the next day. We went to Wendy's and ate dollar menu items, which was fine, I am not a gold digger.... THEN while eating at a picnic table, he smiles sweetly and says he has a question for me..."do you like oral, because I am really hungry and Wendy didn't fill me up".

    REALLY?
  • carlsonrobb
    carlsonrobb Posts: 914 Member
    This one time... when I was newly single...I signed up for Plenty Of Fish. I met a guy online, we talked often, hit it off via text and phone, so we decided to meet for dinner. I should have known then that something was off...I paid for dinner and the tip AND we ended up going to a movie, which I also paid for. I stayed in town overnight but not with him, and he asked me to meet him for lunch the next day. We went to Wendy's and ate dollar menu items, which was fine, I am not a gold digger.... THEN while eating at a picnic table, he smiles sweetly and says he has a question for me..."do you like oral, because I am really hungry and Wendy didn't fill me up".

    REALLY?

    What a pig. Lol