Pushy Co-Workers
Options
Replies
-
Order whatever, pick at it a bit during the shindig. Then, eat your own lunch when you go back to your desk and you're pretty sure nobody's (or at least your boss isn't) looking.0
-
bigblondewolf wrote: »Looking for some help to handle a bit of a sticky situation.
Our work is ordering in for a mandatory "celebration lunch" (yes, attendance is mandatory, don't ask) for all of the employees in our location. We're all expected to put in our order to the chain restaurant they've chosen.
But I'd rather bring my own lunch and use the calories for better food that I actually enjoy and that doesn't make me feel ill.
When I told my boss this I was told to "just get a salad."
How do I get out of this without causing awkward friction without my employer?
In my office there was a list of acceptable foods...that we could eat and that list was probably 30 years old. I went to the hr dept and that list was revised to a huge healthy list. It was a change in the right direction.
0 -
janejellyroll wrote: »bigblondewolf wrote: »Be a team player here. Just making the effort speaks louder of your integrity rather than opposing. It's one meal not a commitment to eating that way forever.
We always have potlucks at my office gym and people bring food that's considered "unhealthy" by many standards. Some eat it, some don't. But they at least show up and don't mock the others for doing so.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
It's not just about the healthy value of the food - as I stated earlier, a lot of the menu options they're giving make me feel very ill. And my boss is not accommodating.
You don't have to order one that will make you feel ill. You can, as your boss suggested, order the salad. I get that it isn't exciting, but one lunch isn't really going to make you die of boredom.
I don't think objecting to being told what to put in my body is being overly difficult.
But if that's the consensus of the majority, then I guess I'm just going to have to suck it up.0 -
bigblondewolf wrote: »I get that I can order a salad, but I don't see why I should have to get a boring salad when I could just eat my own delicious lunch. I mean, there's nothing wrong with bringing my own food and eating it at the table with them, is there?
This happened to my husband, it's about perception. The others might perceive you as being difficult or snobby...you get the idea. Doesn't mean it's right, but it makes you stand out and you can't control what others think, and it doesn't matter what others think most of the time, but when you have to work with others and you can't control what they think you usually try to avoid coming off as difficult or high maintenance even if you don't mean to. It's not fair but hey that's life.
0 -
Just say you don't like that chain restaurant, and that you'll be there, but will be bringing your own lunch. If they push the issue, say they can order you whatever they want, but you won't be eating it because you don't like it. Easy.0
-
be part of the team. check out the low cal options at the chain restaurant, and celebrate success with everyon.0
-
Then order the salad and eat it or not. At the very least you're making an effort.bigblondewolf wrote: »Be a team player here. Just making the effort speaks louder of your integrity rather than opposing. It's one meal not a commitment to eating that way forever.
We always have potlucks at my office gym and people bring food that's considered "unhealthy" by many standards. Some eat it, some don't. But they at least show up and don't mock the others for doing so.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
It's not just about the healthy value of the food - as I stated earlier, a lot of the menu options they're giving make me feel very ill. And my boss is not accommodating.
And I didn't "mock" anyone for the way they eat. I don't care what other people eat, I just don't want to be forced to eat food I don't want and that doesn't make me feel good for the sake of keeping the social peace.
You don't have to mock people by saying anything. If you bring your own food to a luncheon that's being offered to everyone, the perception is that the food isn't good enough for you. Actions do speak volumes even when nothing is said.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
0 -
Then order the salad and eat it or not. At the very least you're making an effort.bigblondewolf wrote: »Be a team player here. Just making the effort speaks louder of your integrity rather than opposing. It's one meal not a commitment to eating that way forever.
We always have potlucks at my office gym and people bring food that's considered "unhealthy" by many standards. Some eat it, some don't. But they at least show up and don't mock the others for doing so.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
It's not just about the healthy value of the food - as I stated earlier, a lot of the menu options they're giving make me feel very ill. And my boss is not accommodating.
And I didn't "mock" anyone for the way they eat. I don't care what other people eat, I just don't want to be forced to eat food I don't want and that doesn't make me feel good for the sake of keeping the social peace.
You don't have to mock people by saying anything. If you bring your own food to a luncheon that's being offered to everyone, the perception is that the food isn't good enough for you. Actions do speak volumes even when nothing is said.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
So by your logic I have to eat what everyone else is going to be eating (even if it makes me sick) or I'll appear judgey and overly difficult?0 -
bigblondewolf wrote: »janejellyroll wrote: »bigblondewolf wrote: »Be a team player here. Just making the effort speaks louder of your integrity rather than opposing. It's one meal not a commitment to eating that way forever.
We always have potlucks at my office gym and people bring food that's considered "unhealthy" by many standards. Some eat it, some don't. But they at least show up and don't mock the others for doing so.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
It's not just about the healthy value of the food - as I stated earlier, a lot of the menu options they're giving make me feel very ill. And my boss is not accommodating.
You don't have to order one that will make you feel ill. You can, as your boss suggested, order the salad. I get that it isn't exciting, but one lunch isn't really going to make you die of boredom.
I don't think objecting to being told what to put in my body is being overly difficult.
But if that's the consensus of the majority, then I guess I'm just going to have to suck it up.
I don't think you are being overly difficult.
I think, as a long-time corporate veteran who admittedly doesn't know anything about your workplace, that you may be a bit rigid. Food is an important vehicle for social connection in our society and sometimes "breaking bread" with others can be an important way to build team connections, especially if the purpose of the event is recognition or celebration.
I'm vegan, so I'm certainly acquainted with the not-much-to-order/nothing-interesting-to-order issue. My personal take is that it's just one meal and it has a wider meaning that what you eat. In these situations, I just eat something that fits my ethical stance without worrying too much about how delicious it is. And sometimes that means just eating a tiny bit and then having my real meal later. You're free to disagree. In your workplace, it may be no big deal. I know that in certain workplaces, taking a stand on an issue like this could wind up having undesirable consequences in terms of how others perceive you.
0 -
Lots of business people may construe this as a form of insubordination though. While it's only a lunch, the action may get noticed and a "hey watch this person and if they can't comply with what we want them to do, get rid of them" reaction might entail. Office gossip spreads fast too.Burt_Huttz wrote: »Bring your own lunch. If you get a hard time from anyone, let them know that you feel uncomfortable taking instructions from coworkers about what to put inside your body.
I'm always for doing what's right for the person. In this case, the right move may be to just go along so it doesn't jeopardize them just because of a disagreement on food choice.
Is it right? Nope. But as mentioned, some office dynamics don't care.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
0 -
bigblondewolf wrote: »
Then order the salad and eat it or not. At the very least you're making an effort.bigblondewolf wrote: »Be a team player here. Just making the effort speaks louder of your integrity rather than opposing. It's one meal not a commitment to eating that way forever.
We always have potlucks at my office gym and people bring food that's considered "unhealthy" by many standards. Some eat it, some don't. But they at least show up and don't mock the others for doing so.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
It's not just about the healthy value of the food - as I stated earlier, a lot of the menu options they're giving make me feel very ill. And my boss is not accommodating.
And I didn't "mock" anyone for the way they eat. I don't care what other people eat, I just don't want to be forced to eat food I don't want and that doesn't make me feel good for the sake of keeping the social peace.
You don't have to mock people by saying anything. If you bring your own food to a luncheon that's being offered to everyone, the perception is that the food isn't good enough for you. Actions do speak volumes even when nothing is said.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
So by your logic I have to eat what everyone else is going to be eating (even if it makes me sick) or I'll appear judgey and overly difficult?
Yep, not fair is it. sometimes you gotta eat a *kitten* sandwich...........or a sh!tty one lol. Personally I would just put food on my plate and push it around. Tell them you are feeling too ill at the moment to be hungry.
0 -
Don't order something that makes you sick- but the odds that there is something available to you that doesn't make you sick is pretty high. most places are extremely accommodating.
So pick something you CAN/WILL/WANT to eat. and eat that.
if not- order something insanely expensive- then don't eat it.
hello over react much- you must be tons of fun to work with.I would bring this to HR dept. if you have one within your company.0 -
bigblondewolf wrote: »
Then order the salad and eat it or not. At the very least you're making an effort.bigblondewolf wrote: »Be a team player here. Just making the effort speaks louder of your integrity rather than opposing. It's one meal not a commitment to eating that way forever.
We always have potlucks at my office gym and people bring food that's considered "unhealthy" by many standards. Some eat it, some don't. But they at least show up and don't mock the others for doing so.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
It's not just about the healthy value of the food - as I stated earlier, a lot of the menu options they're giving make me feel very ill. And my boss is not accommodating.
And I didn't "mock" anyone for the way they eat. I don't care what other people eat, I just don't want to be forced to eat food I don't want and that doesn't make me feel good for the sake of keeping the social peace.
You don't have to mock people by saying anything. If you bring your own food to a luncheon that's being offered to everyone, the perception is that the food isn't good enough for you. Actions do speak volumes even when nothing is said.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
So by your logic I have to eat what everyone else is going to be eating (even if it makes me sick) or I'll appear judgey and overly difficult?
I'm somewhat confused: I thought your issue with ordering a salad is that it would be "boring," not that it would make you sick. Is there absolutely nothing you can order that will not make you ill?0 -
Capt_Apollo wrote: »be part of the team. check out the low cal options at the chain restaurant, and celebrate success with everyon.
I agree! well said
0 -
bigblondewolf wrote: »janejellyroll wrote: »bigblondewolf wrote: »Be a team player here. Just making the effort speaks louder of your integrity rather than opposing. It's one meal not a commitment to eating that way forever.
We always have potlucks at my office gym and people bring food that's considered "unhealthy" by many standards. Some eat it, some don't. But they at least show up and don't mock the others for doing so.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
It's not just about the healthy value of the food - as I stated earlier, a lot of the menu options they're giving make me feel very ill. And my boss is not accommodating.
You don't have to order one that will make you feel ill. You can, as your boss suggested, order the salad. I get that it isn't exciting, but one lunch isn't really going to make you die of boredom.
I don't think objecting to being told what to put in my body is being overly difficult.
But if that's the consensus of the majority, then I guess I'm just going to have to suck it up.
I'll be honest, you sound like you're being a really high-maintenance PITA and I would be so annoyed if I were your boss. I don't think you should take it to HR. I don't think you should insist on doing your own thing.
I think you should order the least offensive thing possible, eat as much or as little as you can manage, have a good time, and add healthy snacks before and after if you need to. Once in a while, our work requirements extend past being at our desk from 9-5. Get used to it, and be a team player.
Frankly, I'm surprised at you and disappointed in how many people I see here suggesting you should be difficult about this.-1 -
The salad thing is kind of insulting, imho. There are clearly people for whom salad is an UNHEALTHY choice for medical reasons. I don't think personally I'd go the route, "my food is yummier" and I'd just say you don't think there are options on the menu you can eat and leave it at that. You don't have to explain why--and if it were me I'd purposefully not say why. I'd just join the celebration, get a bottle of water and have fun. Good luck.0
-
HardcoreP0rk wrote: »bigblondewolf wrote: »janejellyroll wrote: »bigblondewolf wrote: »Be a team player here. Just making the effort speaks louder of your integrity rather than opposing. It's one meal not a commitment to eating that way forever.
We always have potlucks at my office gym and people bring food that's considered "unhealthy" by many standards. Some eat it, some don't. But they at least show up and don't mock the others for doing so.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
It's not just about the healthy value of the food - as I stated earlier, a lot of the menu options they're giving make me feel very ill. And my boss is not accommodating.
You don't have to order one that will make you feel ill. You can, as your boss suggested, order the salad. I get that it isn't exciting, but one lunch isn't really going to make you die of boredom.
I don't think objecting to being told what to put in my body is being overly difficult.
But if that's the consensus of the majority, then I guess I'm just going to have to suck it up.
I'll be honest, you sound like you're being a really high-maintenance PITA and I would be so annoyed if I were your boss. I don't think you should take it to HR. I don't think you should insist on doing your own thing.
I think you should order the least offensive thing possible, eat as much or as little as you can manage, have a good time, and add healthy snacks before and after if you need to. Once in a while, our work requirements extend past being at our desk from 9-5. Get used to it, and be a team player.
Frankly, I'm surprised at you and disappointed in how many people I see here suggesting you should be difficult about this.
This is moronic. It's moronic that the company is trying to force her to eat from somewhere she doesn't want to eat. It's moronic that anyone would think it's OK that her company is trying to do this.0 -
I'm guessing this isn't as big a deal as it seems. I'm betting if you pushed back and just bottom lined that you were doing a program/dieting/have specific dietary needs it'd be no big deal. Stand up for yourself. That aside, if you're going the no friction route just order the salad (or anything else) and just don't eat much or any of it. Say you're not hungry or you're full. Sneak off and dump it out. Say you feel ill and don't feel like eating it. On the off chance that this really is a big issue and your boss is genuinely forcing you to eat something you don't want then perhaps it's time to contact a lawyer. I'm sure that violates some kind of employer/employee boundary.
Yes, a lawsuit should set everything right.
I'd much rather hire a lawyer than pick at an unappealing salad.
0
Categories
- All Categories
- 1.4M Health, Wellness and Goals
- 391.4K Introduce Yourself
- 43.4K Getting Started
- 259.7K Health and Weight Loss
- 175.6K Food and Nutrition
- 47.3K Recipes
- 232.3K Fitness and Exercise
- 388 Sleep, Mindfulness and Overall Wellness
- 6.4K Goal: Maintaining Weight
- 8.5K Goal: Gaining Weight and Body Building
- 152.7K Motivation and Support
- 7.8K Challenges
- 1.3K Debate Club
- 96.2K Chit-Chat
- 2.5K Fun and Games
- 3.2K MyFitnessPal Information
- 22 News and Announcements
- 918 Feature Suggestions and Ideas
- 2.3K MyFitnessPal Tech Support Questions