St Louis area trainer posts picture of overweight fan at Cardinals game

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brianpperkins
brianpperkins Posts: 6,124 Member
in Motivation and Support
http://www.kmov.com/story/28999430/trainer-not-apologizing-for-body-shaming-woman-at-busch-stadium

A few details that show up on the trainer's facebook site that aren't in the news story (besides her food intake which she then logged on this site) ... apparently the fans originally sitting to this woman's left relocated during the game due to her infringing upon their seat after having to sit sideways. I don't agree with his methodology, but, there does need to be an honest discussion about weight ... about when one person's size starts infringing upon others ... about the societal cost of obesity ... about what is saying a condition is unhealthy in general and shaming an individual ...
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Replies

  • lessismoreohio
    lessismoreohio Posts: 910 Member
    edited May 2015
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    Never a legitimate reason to body shame someone. Reveals far more about the person doing the shaming than about the person being shamed.
  • brianpperkins
    brianpperkins Posts: 6,124 Member
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    lessismoreohio wrote: »
    Never a legitimate reason to body shame someone. Reveals far more about the person doing the shaming than about the person being shamed.

    Is pointing out that being so large that they spill into adjacent seats and cause others to relocate truly shaming?
  • I_Will_End_You
    I_Will_End_You Posts: 4,397 Member
    edited May 2015
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    The guy definitely sounds like an *kitten* on his Facebook page in general, but his post about the people next to her having to move does not bother me. I don't know that I'd call it fat shaming, more like an observation. Reporting what she was eating? Yeah....all aboard the douche canoe. While I don't think it was necessary to post her picture, I agree that people should not have to be uncomfortable in a seat they paid for because the person next to them is sharing it with them!

    ETA: The media definitely didn't need to post it all over the place. It's likely the woman would have never seen it had they not. :s
  • yopeeps025
    yopeeps025 Posts: 8,680 Member
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    So I should be angry when these two obese guys tried to ride and stalled the roller coaster by a half hour because they were to big to use the seat belt?
  • jgnatca
    jgnatca Posts: 14,464 Member
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    Was the trainer concerned perhaps that the fan was unaware of their size? If there were inconvenienced fans, shouldn't it have been dealt with there rather than publishing the incident? When I was at my largest, should I have deferred air travel until I could fit in the seats without infringing on my neighbours? Don't laugh. I have acquaintances that pretty well turned themselves in to shut-ins because of the shame.
  • SarcasmIsMyLoveLanguage
    SarcasmIsMyLoveLanguage Posts: 2,671 Member
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    Wow. I want to cry for that woman, even though her face is never shown. Does this guy think she's completely unaware of her weight?

    Yes, we need to be having frank discussions about weight - with our Doctors, family, and others who care about our wellbeing. Some a-hole fat shaming a stranger on social media is not having a discussion. It's a DB being insensitive and using someone else's misfortune to his advantage. It's sickening.

    At the risk of the other MFPers jumping down my throat, I'm going to use the B-word here. This guy is a bully. Plain and simple.
  • fallenoaks4
    fallenoaks4 Posts: 63 Member
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    jgnatca wrote: »
    Was the trainer concerned perhaps that the fan was unaware of their size? If there were inconvenienced fans, shouldn't it have been dealt with there rather than publishing the incident? When I was at my largest, should I have deferred air travel until I could fit in the seats without infringing on my neighbours? Don't laugh. I have acquaintances that pretty well turned themselves in to shut-ins because of the shame.

    There are some people who are unaware of their size. My 500 lb BIL insists that he is just "big boned" for example. It does happen. Not saying this excuses what the personal trainer did.

    The lady should have bought two seats. Same as air travel. If you use two seats/spaces, pay for them.
  • lessismoreohio
    lessismoreohio Posts: 910 Member
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    brianpperkins wrote: »
    lessismoreohio wrote: »
    Never a legitimate reason to body shame someone. Reveals far more about the person doing the shaming than about the person being shamed.

    Is pointing out that being so large that they spill into adjacent seats and cause others to relocate truly shaming?

    Yes, this is fat shaming in my opinion. Especially when a picture is posted on Facebook.

    What is the value in doing this?

    What does it profit the shamer?
  • yopeeps025
    yopeeps025 Posts: 8,680 Member
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    amyrebeccah wrote: »
    yopeeps025 wrote: »
    So I should be angry when these two obese guys tried to ride and stalled the roller coaster by a half hour because they were to big to use the seat belt?
    I don't see why you shouldn't be annoyed--angry seems like a bit of a reaction but that's your call. But I wouldn't find it appropriate to post a picture of them so their bodies can be judged and pretend like you had some kind of magnanimous purpose.

    Well I honesty would not do that because I would be hurt if it was done to me. I am sure that my dirty looks at them two were enough. Also I don't see how they got pass the checkpoints where ride attendees check every person seat.
    The ride was
    Superman-Ride_Of_Steel-2.jpg

    at the top.
  • sofaking6
    sofaking6 Posts: 4,589 Member
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    amyrebeccah wrote: »
    yopeeps025 wrote: »
    So I should be angry when these two obese guys tried to ride and stalled the roller coaster by a half hour because they were to big to use the seat belt?
    I don't see why you shouldn't be annoyed--angry seems like a bit of a reaction but that's your call. But I wouldn't find it appropriate to post a picture of them so their bodies can be judged and pretend like you had some kind of magnanimous purpose.

    Agreed on both counts. I really can't stand it when strangers touch me, and I do not think that being overweight makes it okay for someone to touch me when I don't want them to. My feelings are just as valid as the person in the plane or stadium or roller coaster seat and I don't like being told that it's body-shaming to expect my own body to be free from unwanted contact.

    But posting a picture of someone, using them to get likes and $$ and make yourself feel like a stud, is truly disgusting. It's just bullying, nothing but.
  • wolverine66
    wolverine66 Posts: 3,780 Member
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    fallenoaks4 wrote: »
    jgnatca wrote: »
    Was the trainer concerned perhaps that the fan was unaware of their size? If there were inconvenienced fans, shouldn't it have been dealt with there rather than publishing the incident? When I was at my largest, should I have deferred air travel until I could fit in the seats without infringing on my neighbours? Don't laugh. I have acquaintances that pretty well turned themselves in to shut-ins because of the shame.

    There are some people who are unaware of their size. My 500 lb BIL insists that he is just "big boned" for example. It does happen. Not saying this excuses what the personal trainer did.

    The lady should have bought two seats. Same as air travel. If you use two seats/spaces, pay for them.

    When I was 225, I knew I was fat, I just had no idea how fat. Actually, it's only now, when i look at comparison pictures do i realize just how big i had let myself get.
  • SarcasmIsMyLoveLanguage
    SarcasmIsMyLoveLanguage Posts: 2,671 Member
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    wolverine66 wrote: »
    fallenoaks4 wrote: »
    jgnatca wrote: »
    Was the trainer concerned perhaps that the fan was unaware of their size? If there were inconvenienced fans, shouldn't it have been dealt with there rather than publishing the incident? When I was at my largest, should I have deferred air travel until I could fit in the seats without infringing on my neighbours? Don't laugh. I have acquaintances that pretty well turned themselves in to shut-ins because of the shame.

    There are some people who are unaware of their size. My 500 lb BIL insists that he is just "big boned" for example. It does happen. Not saying this excuses what the personal trainer did.

    The lady should have bought two seats. Same as air travel. If you use two seats/spaces, pay for them.

    When I was 225, I knew I was fat, I just had no idea how fat. Actually, it's only now, when i look at comparison pictures do i realize just how big i had let myself get.
    I think most of us agree with that. Pictures tell the story.
    But this wasn't done out of concern, it was spite. They guy is just nasty.

  • yopeeps025
    yopeeps025 Posts: 8,680 Member
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    wolverine66 wrote: »
    fallenoaks4 wrote: »
    jgnatca wrote: »
    Was the trainer concerned perhaps that the fan was unaware of their size? If there were inconvenienced fans, shouldn't it have been dealt with there rather than publishing the incident? When I was at my largest, should I have deferred air travel until I could fit in the seats without infringing on my neighbours? Don't laugh. I have acquaintances that pretty well turned themselves in to shut-ins because of the shame.

    There are some people who are unaware of their size. My 500 lb BIL insists that he is just "big boned" for example. It does happen. Not saying this excuses what the personal trainer did.

    The lady should have bought two seats. Same as air travel. If you use two seats/spaces, pay for them.

    When I was 225, I knew I was fat, I just had no idea how fat. Actually, it's only now, when i look at comparison pictures do i realize just how big i had let myself get.

    agree. There is a reason why my center pic is what it is. My picture of me at my highest weight ever.
  • bingo_jenn
    bingo_jenn Posts: 63 Member
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    What makes me sad is you also never know someone's journey. Maybe that person has already lost 100 pounds, or had an extreme medical condition that made them gain, or as some of us have been, we knew we were heavy, but not "that" heavy.
  • I_Will_End_You
    I_Will_End_You Posts: 4,397 Member
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    What else is sad is that if you read some of the comments on his Facebook page, people go off on him for body shaming, and follow it up with "curves are beautiful, sticks are not". Way to make your whole argument invalid.
  • wolverine66
    wolverine66 Posts: 3,780 Member
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    BinkyBonk wrote: »
    wolverine66 wrote: »
    fallenoaks4 wrote: »
    jgnatca wrote: »
    Was the trainer concerned perhaps that the fan was unaware of their size? If there were inconvenienced fans, shouldn't it have been dealt with there rather than publishing the incident? When I was at my largest, should I have deferred air travel until I could fit in the seats without infringing on my neighbours? Don't laugh. I have acquaintances that pretty well turned themselves in to shut-ins because of the shame.

    There are some people who are unaware of their size. My 500 lb BIL insists that he is just "big boned" for example. It does happen. Not saying this excuses what the personal trainer did.

    The lady should have bought two seats. Same as air travel. If you use two seats/spaces, pay for them.

    When I was 225, I knew I was fat, I just had no idea how fat. Actually, it's only now, when i look at comparison pictures do i realize just how big i had let myself get.
    I think most of us agree with that. Pictures tell the story.
    But this wasn't done out of concern, it was spite. They guy is just nasty.

    I was specifically commenting on the notion that this woman knows how big she is. She might not.

    That doesn't make what the trainer did justified. It doesn't.

    It's totally possible (if not likely) we have an inconsiderate and/or oblivious big woman AND a douche trainer guy showcasing his douchiness.
  • brianpperkins
    brianpperkins Posts: 6,124 Member
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    I_Will_End_You wrote: »
    What else is sad is that if you read some of the comments on his Facebook page, people go off on him for body shaming, and follow it up with "curves are beautiful, sticks are not". Way to make your whole argument invalid.

    It's like the people lambasting him for judging then judging him ... logical consistency is not one of Facebook's strong points.
  • WinoGelato
    WinoGelato Posts: 13,454 Member
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    BinkyBonk wrote: »
    Wow. I want to cry for that woman, even though her face is never shown. Does this guy think she's completely unaware of her weight?

    Yes, we need to be having frank discussions about weight - with our Doctors, family, and others who care about our wellbeing. Some a-hole fat shaming a stranger on social media is not having a discussion. It's a DB being insensitive and using someone else's misfortune to his advantage. It's sickening.

    At the risk of the other MFPers jumping down my throat, I'm going to use the B-word here. This guy is a bully. Plain and simple.

    Agree with all this.
    I_Will_End_You wrote: »
    The guy definitely sounds like an *kitten* on his Facebook page in general, but his post about the people next to her having to move does not bother me. I don't know that I'd call it fat shaming, more like an observation. Reporting what she was eating? Yeah....all aboard the douche canoe. While I don't think it was necessary to post her picture, I agree that people should not have to be uncomfortable in a seat they paid for because the person next to them is sharing it with them!

    ETA: The media definitely didn't need to post it all over the place. It's likely the woman would have never seen it had they not. :s

    And with this.

    I'm embarrassed, living in St. Louis, that this guy breathes some of the same air as me.

    I think he was trolling and sensationalizing and I think it is going to come back and kill his business.



  • bingo_jenn
    bingo_jenn Posts: 63 Member
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    http://theantijared.com/2015/05/i-was-the-so-called-unhealthy-fat-woman-at-the-cardinals-game-2.html

    I just found this on his FB page with her response. Haven't finished reading it yet.
  • SarcasmIsMyLoveLanguage
    SarcasmIsMyLoveLanguage Posts: 2,671 Member
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    bingo_jenn wrote: »
    http://theantijared.com/2015/05/i-was-the-so-called-unhealthy-fat-woman-at-the-cardinals-game-2.html

    I just found this on his FB page with her response. Haven't finished reading it yet.
    Oh I need to read this.

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