We broke up because...
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Didn't know how to cook0
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I found out I was interested in women.0
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Seeing that I am Batman, I had to protect her from my enemies..
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he was delusional. Hes clearly a Robin0
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Never let me dream big0
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Was always dreaming0
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He always liked to be on top!
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He looked too much like an owl0
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He slept walk all the time and would pee in the closet0
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He was more into my dog than me0
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Cropped pictures too high.0
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His thumb looked like his penis.
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His thumb was too small0
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He didn't let me stick the bell up his *kitten* after0
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He didn't let me stick the bell up his *kitten* after0
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Her nose kept poking my cheek when we would make out. 0
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He made noises like it was night time & I was cutting down his tree.0
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She was too dominating in the bedroom. Don't you know??? Im in charge0
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Made fun of my calves0
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I said they were sexy. He could never take a compliment0
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She thought I was a dude0
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She said the gopher looked to fake in "CaddyShack" lmao! 0
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He laughed at me when I said I was afraid of gophers.0
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She was to sensitive0
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She was only 47
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She was terrified of ground hog day!0
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Only because it keep predicting a longer winter. Who wants that??? Just terrifying.
He wanted to wear my underwear and would stretch them all out.0 -
She bought me Axe Body spray for my bday
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Didn't appreciate my gifts.0
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