Pregnancy 2011- June

Hey Ladies!

I sure hope it isn't too late to join this awesome group. This exactly where I want to be! My husband and I are in category "one" for right now, but after a few months maybe going into category "two". :happy:

I am addicted to MFP and I've looked online at baby websites, but I don't feel a real connection because I'm just focusing on pre-baby health at this point. This group is a terrific solution!

I'm 30 years old and I've had my pre conception appointment thus far. This spring I found out a have hereditary gum disease - yuck! So right now I'm working on getting my gums all taken care of and working with my weight/strength and diet.

I've lost most of the weight I want, but I'd love to be more tone and lean before baby.

So glad to be here!!!!

Rachel -- I've heard snoring is a pretty common pregnancy symptom. Normally, I snore when I don't exercise regularly (luckily, these days walking from the couch to the kitchen seems to be enough exercise to keep me from snoring :laugh:).

I have a potentially big problem brewing and I have no idea how to handle it without hurting feelings. This weekend my mom suggested that she would be LITERALLY camping out nearby after baby is born to "help." And by literally camping out, I mean it -- parking a camper at a nearby state park. I love my mom. I really do. But apparently she's forgotten that we don't get along very well for very long. The reason she's forgotten is because I've managed to not spend more than 12 hours or so with her at a time since I moved out at 17 (yes, I moved out while I was still in high school because I couldn't take my mom's neverending drama anymore). I can just imagine how I'm going to feel about her being here after more than 2-3 days with all the stress we're going to be under at first and being exhausted and in pain. It won't be good, I can pretty much guarantee that. She was even lamenting over how if she parked a camper, she wouldn't be able to be at our house ALL THE TIME. I said "um... well, I think [hubby] and I will appreciate some time alone with the baby." She responded "Maybe." :indifferent: She insists I'll need someone to cook and clean because ALL I'll be able to do is nurse the baby. Firstly, naive as I may be, I don't think that's exactly 100% true. Secondly, I have a pretty great husband (despite my complaints ) who will be at home and he is more than willing to help with most of the cooking and cleaning (of course, I'll have to instruct him on the cleaning, but he almost always does whatever I ask him... repeatedly... to do :laugh:).

I know she wants to help (at least in her mind, that's her reasoning). I'm happy for her to come down and stay with us for a few days, but I also want LOTS of time alone with my own family so we can all get to know each other and get used to our new routine. I don't know how to explain the way I feel to her. She essentially threw a poutfest when I finally told her I wasn't in love with the idea of her coming to our baby party this weekend (no, she was never invited.. she tried to invite herself). But the fact is, I don't really want her to come and I suggested that was the case but she still seemed set on coming whether I wanted her to or not. Finally I just told her no.

I don't understand why she feels like she has to be a part of every single baby related thing. She's upset I don't want her there to see the baby being born. She even refers to Maisie as "our baby." :noway: I'm beginning to become seriously frustrated with the situation. She has a hard time not making everything that happens 100% about her -- very high drama. I KNOW if I try to bring up that we'd like to be alone after a few days it's going to be this huge dramatic "Why are you doing this to ME" kind of episode but I also think our wishes need to be taken into consideration and respected and that I should be honest. Maybe I should just wait until the time comes and if she tries to really overstay her welcome I'll bring it up at the time. Help?

Also, FACT: My mom lives less than 2 hours away from us. Not like she can't easily make a day trip every couple of weeks.

bump

Maureen - Cute new pic, you look great!

Mamarandall - Love your new pic, hope you are getting some rest!

Lindsay - Hope your trip goes well and you enjoy the trade show.

Katrina - Sounds like you had a nice weekend, glad you got to see your hubby for a bit. Hope all goes well today with your son's endoscopy, keep us posted.

Ronya - I rarely feel Josh in the middle of the night anymore, crossing my fingers that he's on a good day/night schedule.

Julie - Hope your appointment goes well! That's a tough situation with your mom, I'm not really sure how I'd go about it? Knowing non-confrontational me, I'd probably bite the bullet and put up with it, but that probably isn't the best thing to do. Is there a way you can put it to where it sounds like you don't want to inconvenience her? Blame it on your husband? Something....I don't know. I'm sorry that you're having to go through something like that, because I know the last thing you want to do is hurt her feelings. Oh - and we have a lot of people on both sides of the family who keep saying "we're pregnant", "our baby" or when "we go into labor" - even though I'm pretty sure I'll be the one doing all the laboring :laugh:

Brittony - Same here, no more milestones left, just baby! I suppose that's the biggest one of all though eh? We are so close! I think I'm gonna get a haircut today too. Nothing fancy, I've had the same haircut/style for like, 8 years :laugh:

Rachael - Cute pic! I LOVE my new glider!

Rachel - My husband complains about me snoring all the time :laugh: I actually wake myself up sometimes when I first start snoring and I'm not quite asleep - yea, it's pretty ferocious :blushing:

Emmy - Welcome!

Collins - hope the tests for your son go well :flowerforyou:

Ron - hope you are feeling better after the salon episode.

Julie - I think you need to put your foot down and make it clear to your Mom that she can be in Maisie's life but ONLY on your terms. You are the mother and get to decide who get's to see her and where and when. I would think about a happy medium to be planned in advance, maybe you can invite her to stay with you every other weekend for a few months.......
From what you have said about your Mom I would imagine that having the baby around is not going to improve your relationship and will be an additional strain so getting boundaries set early might prevent any major confrontations.
I'm the one whose mother is going to come and live with us for 6 months and I'm not really sure how well that might go but we are starting with a strong foundation. My mother is respectful of my needs and wants and can handle any boundaries I might want to have in place. I'm very lucky in that regard.
Good luck with the difficult but necessary conversations.:flowerforyou:

Julie- My parents were around quite a bit after my daughter was born and so were my in laws. I had a little pep talk with them all when we first brought Allison home. I basically told them she was our baby and we were new parents. I said I realized they had done the whole parenting thing before but we were going to raise her how we wanted to. I also made sure to mention sometimes I get overwhelmed or just might need some alone time with my fiance and daughter only. The parents were very understanding or at least it seemed thay way....maybe they were just scared of my out of control mood swings lol. This is your families special time and you need to make your opinion heard. I know it seems a bit overwhelming but at least she is staying away from the house. Maybe if she annoys you too much you can send her to the camper. I know with us it was so nice to have someone watch Allison even for just a little bit while we took a nap.

Ronya -- LOL at the "Baby! This is your daddy!" thing. My husband does this really high pitched annoying "BABY!" yell into my belly. She always stops moving when he's around. I honestly think she's afraid of him. :laugh: If she's killing me with the wiggling around, all he has to do is put his hand on my belly and she immediately freezes. :laugh: He has a very deep and intimidating voice and I seriously think she's startled by it. It's going to come in so handy when she's about 13!

Rachael -- I forgot to mention earlier that I also love your new picture! You're pretty much the most adorable little pregnant lady ever.

Thanks for all the sweet picture comments. You are all awesome and know how to make a girl feel good.

Lynn: I am so sorry about your news! Bedrest would be super hard! I hope your test results come out ok, but then if you get induced little Josh will be here and you will be right on maternity leave. I do hope all works out in the way that you want it to and a way that is healthiest for you and Josh. I will keep you in my thoughts.