WOMEN AGES 50 + FOR SEPTEMBER 2015

Call me crazy but I love to see other people happy and succeeding .

Good Evening Ladies,

Barbie, your comments to Kim about the holidays took the words right out of my mouth….or off the ends of my fingers. As we have moved away from family and friends we have certainly changed the way we celebrate the holidays. There are always people around that have no family and no plans that would love an invitation to a holiday dinner or celebration. And yes, it is so different now that I don’t use food as recreation. My periodontist didn’t think much of it (one way or the other) when I got a Waterpik about a year ago but my checkups have been even more positive since then. It now gives instructions on flossing with the water under the gum line. Just FYI.

Katla, first of all, I love the new picture. I can’t wait to see what you decided for the holidays. I would love to take a Christmas cruise but DH is just not into cruising. At our age, Christmas just will never be like it was when we were young and when we had a young child at home. Those were such special times and hold wonderful memories but things have changed. I even have such great memories of gift giving and receiving and what fun that was. At this point there is so little that we want or need so even that has changed. I love the Christmas Eve candlelight services.

Joyce, I guess I am just a selfish type person because I don’t think you should feel bad. You are working your tail off trying to do all you can for him and I think it’s perfectly normal to feel the way you do. We are all human after all. So why do you think he ate when he did? Was it because he knew you weren’t going to baby him at that time or what? The good thing is that he did eat and the BP got better. Remember you have to take care of you to be any good to him, so give yourself a break. You are an angle.

Mindy, glad you got the yard mowed. I know you were not happy with yourself for calling him a looser, but the truth is, that is what he was acting like. Who knows, maybe hearing that is what got him off his butt to do something. You are doing great so give yourself a pat on the back.

Penny, OMG I’m still laughing at your DH saying, “I think you have dialed the wrong number”. So sorry your throat is bad, too. Hope you start improving immediately.

Miriam, glad you at least got one step closer on the apartment paperwork. Crossing fingers now.

Lillian, your gardening helper sounds like so much fun. We worry so much about cleaning house for company but I’ll bet they won’t notice if you don’t get it all done. Just have a good time.

Heather, I just love reading about your food. Also your shopping, like “When I get into that fishmonger I am a devil. ££££££££££ s.”. LOL

MNMargaret, good luck in seeking a new choir. I agree that #1 and 2 should be the most important things. Any new choir will be lucky to have you.

Terri, I love reading about your different holidays. That is one nice thing about the Moose, that anyone can go there alone and not feel alone. 

Janetr, sorry about your friend’s Mom passing. Gosh brain tumors can take people out fast or at least the one’s I’ve known of.

Mia, how wonderful that your pillow found its way home!!! Did you call or did the hotel do that on its own?

Katla, I have always loved Christmas sweaters and had quite a collection which I wore during the holidays. This year I’ll be starting from scratch but I’ll manage to get one or two.

CarolNC, I have to say I hate that you and others prefer to do nothing for the holidays. Of course that is your option but even when there are just the two of us, I have a warm feeling about Christmas and always remember the reason for the season.

Irish Terri, your Christmas’s sound wonderful.

Meg, I hope you live on high ground and are staying home. That is a lot of rain.

Pip, so glad to hear that you are doing M A R V E L O U S, as expected. It seems you have it all under control but do please take it easy for a day or two. We love you!

to any Newbies that I missed. Come often and join in the chat. This thing works!! Please sign your post with what you want to be called. It makes it easier for us to respond to you. Also a location is great, be it specific or general. We are happy to have you join us.

DH and I went shopping this morning (well almost noon) and then out to lunch. I came home and started a pot of soup which will be for tomorrow. Tonight is baked chicken, fresh green beans and fresh broccoli. Yeppers, I like green veggies.

Sending the best thoughts to all of you and I hope all of you have a healthy and happy day.

Words I live by:
Savor. I have to slow down and savor every bite.
and
Opportunity. Each day offers new opportunities for good health and happiness if we just look for them and choose them.
I Love you,
DJ
Myrtle Beach, SC

Janetr-I'm sorry for your losses. Hugs!

DJ- I think I feel so negatively towards the holidays because there are so many expectations and I can't meet them so I don't try so that I won't fail. Being by myself doesn't help any. I have begun using a portion of both Thanksgiving and Christmas to reflect and meditate, focusing on the good things I have in my life.

I am still struggling with depression but it is not as deep as it was. There are two or three things that weighing so heavily on my mind and it is simply going to take time to process/grieve. I'm trying hard to be patient with myself.

Hope everyone has a good evening!

Carol in NC

Just as I was ready to drift off to sleep last night, I heard a huge thump and I got up and found Charlie on the floor. Flat on the floor, on his stomach. He said he lost his balance coming back to bed from many of his trips to the bathroom. His blood pressure was OK, no bumps or bruises so we went back to bed. This morning he ate fairly well, blood pressure OK so no worries. So we went to the mall for his normal daily walk he had always done before meningitis. we got 3 short laps in along with his 3 trips to the bathroom. I walked through antique stores while he went to bathroom. Then on the way home he yelled out for me to get his jacket from the back seat and get it quick. I knew what was going on but it was to late. So now I have to find out if my cleaning worked. I used vinegar and dawn and a scrubber and eventually the paper towels came out no color.

The afternoon just got worse. Normal blood pressure became down in the 90's, then 80's and then 70/40. Pretty dizzy. called doctor and this medicine he ordered last night will be doubled for the weekend and we are to give report Monday morning. I would have rather just driven t o the ER. But most of the time he feels OK, just certain times his blood pressure just drops. I know there is a condition that heart rate and blood pressure can plummet when you have a bowel movement or vomit. But that's not the case here. He ate a weird supper but did force it down. 3 tamales with Brooks super hot chili, potato chips and grapes! When he left the rehab center, he was deemed completely capable of caring for himself. Now to go back to the rehab, you have to have a 3 day stay at a hospital. Now that part of it I wouldn't mind it at all.

MnMargaret, I dont know what I would do without my choir and especially the Christmas music. I missed it this past Wednesday night. I do have the practice CD and practice at home.

Joyce, Indiana

janetr7476 wrote: »

Just got the news a bit ago that my ex had passed. All in all today was not a good day. Lost two good friends. Feeling heavy hearted.

Janetr OKC

I'm so sorry for your loss. (((hugs)))

Beautiful day today! Here is a little fall color! From my walk today!



Mary from Minnesota

You are an inspiration Pip! I'd say take it slow and steady....but that went out the window.....!

My thoughts and prayers to all who are suffering physically, mentally and emotionally. This group of women is so strong in supporting one another thru all our different life's trials. We are quite the blessed group here.

Husband went down today with an illness. He is NEVER sick! He was laying on the couch moaning and groaning. I asked him what was up, what hurt, etc... did he need me to get him anything. He replied that he was in "excruciating" pain. I said did that mean we needed to get him in the car and on the way to the medical clinic. He said no. I asked what hurt and he replied his legs. I asked on a scale of 1 to 10 how much it hurt. I expected him to say 10...after all that is the number that belongs at an excruciating level of pain...he said "4"! Honey, that is not "excruciating"! I sent him up to bed. Still sleeping it off....oye vey when men get sick?!

I could go on and on about the topic of holidays....we are Jewish and so have many different holidays but the same problems. When your husband has Aspergers and doesn't get along with his family let alone your own it makes for interesting holiday situations. I totally concur with him that both our extended families are dysfunctional but I do have more of a sense of obligation towards family. I mentioned before about "living on the rim" of the families. For a long time I would take the kids and go to family functions. He would be pissed when we left and more pissed when we returned and the burden of that got to me and the kids after awhile. So we stayed home and had our own family holiday celebrations. I no longer wanted to endure his battles about it and I no longer wanted to attend these events without my husband at my side.

Which brings us to the current situation of being invited to my parent's for this Thanksgiving as all of my siblings, spouses, grandchildren and great grandchildren will be attending. It will be the last big gathering as my parent's are both ill and cannot handle the crowd anymore. We all haven't been together since my dad's 80th birthday party 5 years ago. I knew my husband would say no and he expected I would also. He was angry when I said I should go and wanted to go. The kids would also like to go. And you know what....I gave him 1 day to get over himself and I have become so much stronger in doing this stuff on my own that I don't feel bad about it. He makes his choices, I have learned to respect them and he should reciprocate with that respect.

You ladies here on the board have helped me see that I can do these things on my own (we do everything together) and it is okay and it is something I should do going forward. So I will be attending Thanksgiving with my extended family. It means having to drive long distance on my own which I have never done before, it means leaving my husband home without a turkey day, it means withstanding my "dysfunctional" family for several days but I'm gonna do it!

Husband is moaning upstairs I guess I better check on him....I really do care but when men get "sick" it just laughable sometimes. At least mine is.

Have a great weekend everyone. We are having beautiful fall weather so I long walk is in my weekend!

Cheri NE Ohio

Mindy, so sorry for all you are going through. Thanks for the advice on the dryer. Luckily, you didn't make me gave to do more work because I was already back home before I read it. LOL! It definitely was not the lint trap, but the other lint build up suggestion might be a possibility. The thing is, the dryer was working perfectly fine the first day that I did laundry, then her son did his laundry, then when I tried to do laundry again, it wasn't drying. It is a gas dryer. My sister says that it has two heating elements.she thinks one of them stopped working. That would explain the fact that we can still feel some heat. She's going to have someone take care of it. Luckily, it is no longer my problem.

Kim, I'm sorry you are having such a hard time with your expectations for the holidays. My extended family is so dysfunctional that there is no way we can have a storybook holiday. Honestly my favorite part of the holidays is the feeling of relief when they are over. And now that my daughter is married with a family of her own and two sets of in-laws, it makes it hard to have celebrations on "the day." I hope that you can find some peace about it.

Pip, glad you are on the mend.

Janetr, condolences and hugs.

pipcd34 wrote: »

nite peeps

Nite!

Cheri - CONGRATULATIONS on making your own plans! I consider myself blessed in my marriage, but often do things on my own as DH has anxiety about groups of strange (to him) people. He doesn't feel comfortable with my family at all. I usually attend events there on my own.
That's ok.

Love Heather UK

..

Is this a closed group, it looks like you have been together for hundreds and hundreds of posts? I don't know how these work, but you look pretty upbeat and encouraging, and I certainly fit the age group. I am in this ONE MORE TIME with a full extra person on my bones. I love that you log your goals and then revisit them each month. Cathy in the woods of NW Washington.