Depression and Weight Loss
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oooooh, it irritates me when only half of what i write posts from my iPad! let me see if i can remember the rest:
Please don't get me wrong, i ADORE all four of my kids. but i'm human, and there's only so much one can listen to.... and then there are the hormonal teen years
wishing all of you a lovely Saturday!
you are all precious children of the universe!
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Hi Group
There are so many challenges in our day to day life to be all things to all people. Our willingness to be available to our families, friends, work mates,neighbours etc and to ensure acceptance and approval can make us overwhelmed with self judgement and uncertainty. Perhaps we need to think differently. We can only ever be ourselves and share moments of our lives as we can.
I have felt a bit overwhelmed this week but wanted to say hello to all of you.
Shel0 -
sorry to hear you've been feeling overwhelmed, but grateful you dropped us a line. hello back to ya!
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Hey Everyone
Back on the saddle. My mood fluctuations require thoughtfulness, mindfulness, and trust. When I feel overwhelmed, I utilise the skill of compartmentalising and sort out the issues one by one and do the "what do I need to accept" and "what do I need to problem solve" gig and that works fairly well. Sure the emotions are there and in particular the feels of "why bother" but I want more out of my life then the doldrums. I had gained back what I had thought I lost in terms of weight last week and felt despair. But when I worked out the matter from a different point of view, I lifted my mood and got down to business in terms of what was going on for me. May sound like hard work but I suppose that is what it takes to get some degree of balance back. I imagine that my strategies would not work for everyone and certainly not for those who were given the tools much earlier on in their lives to make great choices in terms of food, relationships, life-style etc. But....for others who have had to discover different pathways and acquire new skills and techniques...well, you may be able to relate to the struggles I am describing. No matter what happens, I want to grow and develop and see what happens next in the stream of uncertainty we all swim in. How are you doing? What do you do when you feel overwhelmed and swallowed up by your lives? Would love to hear from you.
Shel
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i forgot to log over the weekend, so i do it today so i can see my week accurately. Guess i only had one meal Saturday and a deficit of 900 calories....I don't even remember being hungry. My energy levels have slowly been increasing. and my accountability is easier at work but i can't figure out how to take care of myself at home. I just don't have it.....but i am fighting for it. it will come. when i feel overwhelmed though, i just do nothing. it helps even if it is counterproductive....but for a productive answer; talking to a friend or my therapist or going to visit my mama helps.0
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good work, alyjb1121!!!! keep going, i think you are doing fabulous! 0
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to answer Shel's question: i hate to admit it, but i just had a big fat temper tantrum. so, there you go. i yelled at my youngest kid so loud and hard, it hurt my back. i fear she is destined to have a mood disorder too
and her mother yelling at her doesn't help, but omg, she would test the patience of Ghandi.
on a positive note, i've managed to eat an extremely low number of sugar grams today, so my brain will be better equipped tomorrow. whew.
thank you to all of you who have served your country. my father served in ww2, my husband served during peacetime. i appreciate the sacrifices made by all troops and their families.0 -
soooooooooo, yesterday i was feeling poorly about my outburst of anger. but today is today, the sun is shining here, the kids have vowed to not argue today(it's their daddy's birthday) and...... i'm actually functioning. might be a fluke, might not, but i'll take it any way i can.
hoping for positivity for all you precious children of the universe.1 -
Myra, I can relate. I keep my cool for such a long time, then the universe tilts, they take it too far, and I lose it. I tend to lose sleep and then beat myself up the whole next day. I figure it teaches them that in relationships there will be these times! Thats what I get from it anyway, and I am learning right along with them. I'm glad you're doing better today.0
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Hi,
Dear Myra, even children of the universe are human and can be placed at the mercy of that part of our brai.n that controls the fight/flight response. When our primitive brain is triggered, we can yell at our best friend, smash our favourite toy, run when we should face our issues or fight when we should bow out . It takes strength,courage and self awareness to pick ourselves up after an awful reaction that we are not proud of and realign our focus, make amends and try and respond differently when we are challenged beyond our levels of tolerance.The same apples, I think, to our management of our food and weight. Last week my brain did everything it knew how to do to make me give up, cash in, bury myself in sugar and salty foods. A great example of how my moods trigger my food compulsions and vice versa. But, thanks to people like you writing on this thread, and my own insight into how I can manage the ups and downs, I let the thunder and lightning g storm pass and life is a wee bit calmer again.... Until the next storm.
Let's keep up the support, love, advice and hope.Best therapy I can think of
Love
shel0 -
We are all human, even the Children of the Universe have angry moments. I think the important thing is to recognize our vulnerable bits and work on recovery. We live and learn; and learn and live.
Depression, Anxiety, Self=esteem issues and all the other issues which challenge our clear thinking and problem-solving requirements must be worked on 24/7. That's the deal about being human. Our brain takes no prisoners. We either harness its power and run the show or it takes off in any direction it sees fit. Myra, at the time that you were yelling at your child, your brain perceived a threat and tried to eliminate it. That is how we are designed. The hard work that has to be done is to become better at understanding ourselves without judgement and let the past be our teacher rather than our prophet. We all deserve love and respect and must role model to other people how we will allow ourselves to be treated. And we must begin this process my demonstrating Self-Compassion and Self-Care.
Anyways, that is what I think.
I know how hard it can be. But, we are in the game...not in the stands so we take one step at a time and do our best.
Let me know what you think.
S
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I have struggled with depression in conjunction with eating issues, and though overeating was not an issue, I think the thought process is rather similar. During my depression, I could not bring myself to eat and did not even consider my body even a really part of myself, of that makes sense. I felt so detached from myself as a being that eating felt futile. I think this same sense of detachment and lack of self care is similar in problems of overeating.
I found that to reconnect with my body, exercise and yoga were incredibly healthy, but also trying to have general awareness of my physical being. My counselor suggested I start walking to work instead of biking, and to take in how each step felt under my feet, and be aware of all of my senses and how my environment interacted with my body. Slowly, I came to respect the body that houses me, and it became easier to want to nourish it with healthy foods in the proper amounts.
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shelleygold wrote: »Having experienced bouts of Depression over the years, I have found that my mood impacts in direct and indirect ways my weight issues. The direct impact is eating more food when I am feeling down and or hopeless as I think less of the longer term consequences rather than the immediate sense of trying to fill a void in my life and/or eating whatever I like because everything is futile and there is no point in worrying about weight since we are all on the Titanic. The indirect impact is a creation of higher levels of cortisol in my system due to increased stress and this reality creates an imbalance in my homeostasis which makes weight loss harder. Also, not eating health foods in a depressed state denies the body of the necessary range of nutrients and this can create lethargy and may even increase the depression. I am wondering if folks might be interested in sharing their experiences with the Depression and weight management and we might discuss some important strategies and ideas that may help? Just throwing this up for consideration.
I for many years live my life drinking my problems away. I knew I had problem but didn't care. I always thought maybe if I die young or doing something crazy that would immortalize me. But what I found out as the years passed is that I Kina like my life. And now I'm doing everything in my power to take it back. Dealing with depression is something I deal with everyday. Somedays are worse then others and sometimes I wanna drink my problems away again. But I have stated eating better and exercising and that has helped so much. I know it seems weird that exercises can make you feel better but it does. Being over weight I always didn't want to go to a gym because people would look at you and judge but the way I look I get judgemental looks anyways. But exercise will make you feel 100% better and then you will get the bug where you will want to work out all the time. No matter if you can only walk for maybe 5 min what your able to do will increase with time but first thing is you have to make yourself do it. Don't count on other ppl its fine if you have someone to support you and I do recommend reaching out and surrounding yourself with positive ppl but you have to want it for your self and that takes dedication and will power. Best of luck in your journey.1 -
to answer Shel's question: i hate to admit it, but i just had a big fat temper tantrum. so, there you go. i yelled at my youngest kid so loud and hard, it hurt my back. i fear she is destined to have a mood disorder too and her mother yelling at her doesn't help, but omg, she would test the patience of Ghandi.
on a positive note, i've managed to eat an extremely low number of sugar grams today, so my brain will be better equipped tomorrow. whew.
thank you to all of you who have served your country. my father served in ww2, my husband served during peacetime. i appreciate the sacrifices made by all troops and their families.
Of all people, family will be the first to both test you, and support you when you need it. When I went through my period of severe stress and anxiety I had a heart to heart talk with my daughter and wife about my signals and when to not push. With PTSD in the picture a common trait is hyper vigilance, and perceived threats.
Some very supportive and inspiring posts by all. Shelleygold, you are wise and have a great deal of insight. And having people that can be mutually supportive and open is refreshing.1 -
Yes! This is me. I was beginning to think I was the only one whose depression caused a lack of appetite and the opposite of overeating. I know I should be eating but sometimes it is all I can do to wake up, go to work, come home and cater to my young kids. I am last. and that includes meals, sleep, anything that I need to be healthy. and lets face it, once i am done with everything the kids need ( a meal for the oldest, a bottle for the youngest, diaper changes, bath time, homework help etc) and i have a moment to choose between eating and resting--give me the rest.sallymarcus413 wrote: »I have struggled with depression in conjunction with eating issues, and though overeating was not an issue, I think the thought process is rather similar. During my depression, I could not bring myself to eat and did not even consider my body even a really part of myself, of that makes sense. I felt so detached from myself as a being that eating felt futile. I think this same sense of detachment and lack of self care is similar in problems of overeating.
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I've been feeling ungrounded lately so I taught an aerial yoga class where balance and centering was our focus. And I think we all felt relieved at the end of class. I still feel a little off but much better than yesterday before class. Teaching the class reminds me about how to be grateful and just exist with no expectation or focus other than the now.0 -
I just want to say that everything happens for a reason. I lurk in forums...I go in and out of my burst of energy for my weight loss resolutions, but today finding this an hour ago was a blessing. I read the topic post by post and my mind got clearer and clearer with each one that I AM NOT ALONE. For sadly I thought I was honestly crazy, that I could not beat this depression and self destructive life I have lived for my adult years...or as far back as I can remember. Thank you...I am very glad to have found you...a saving grace...0
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THANK YOU, so much for the kind words from soulofgrace, shelleygold, and robertw486! I truly appreciate your understanding and support!
as for depression causing lack of appetite.... that is a symptom of "typical" depression. My sister reacts this way. for myself, over-eating in response to depression is labeled "atypical" depression. same with sleep: "typical" is can't sleep. "atypical" (which describes me) is sleeps too much. either way, it generally sucks
i'm glad you found this thread too, cmr3399. you are SO not alone!
Shel, I'm glad you hung in there even though you had a tough one last week. Whenever those weeks come around, remember that we are here for you! I know you have "real life" support too..... but, hey, if a commitment to this thread helps you tough it out and stick with it..... USE IT! (and i'll do the same)
now i have to go prepare some vegetables. vegetables are our friends. yay, veggies! (yes, i'm talking myself into them)0 -
robertw486 wrote: »Some very supportive and inspiring posts by all. Shelleygold, you are wise and have a great deal of insight. And having people that can be mutually supportive and open is refreshing.
I couldn't agree more! (ok, NOW i'm on those veggies)0 -
I've been feeling as if I am drowning lately. I can't seem to get out of it...feeling lost.
I have a lot going on at the moment and feel very overwhelmed.0 -
Dear cerise-noir, I found myself reacting with concern when I read your brief yet potent post. Not being able to get out of the awful feelings that consume us is serious and cannot be ignored. Would you please find someone you can trust to share your feelings with and if necessary contact a professional service or even a crisis telephone support service in your area? Sometimes, just having someone to talk to can be an amazing quick way to diffuse the immediate sense that we are all alone and have no where to turn. I think I am reasonable aware of my moods but from time to time I make a call to an objective third person who has a bit of a training and I am always amazed at how my mood shifts a bit and I move into problem solving with a little more energy. Please, reach out to someone? This is a message for all of us. I love this thread and appreciate its role in my world. I do know however that our moods and issues can be larger than we think and we need to do what we need to do.
Thanks for listening.
Shel
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My weight loss has been both a blessing and a curse. I suffered from depression before I lost the weight, and it continues to be a bit of an issue. If anything, losing weight has bought up a lot of unresolved issues to the surface, especially when it comes to self image - which has been a bit of a challenge.
As of right now, a lot of it centers around all the loose skin.
I certainly wish I was one of those people that can't eat when I'm depressed, but I have a tendency to binge when I get down on myself. Crying spells have increased in frequency, and when I'm in the middle of one of these spells it's definitely more difficult to work out - I feel more lethargic. I push through it, because I know that I'll feel better in the end, and that is one of the biggest motivators for me to keep going.
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Hi Everyone,
Is there a space between rain drops? Is there an instant between the thoughts are brains generate? Can we slow our thinking down, just long enough, to reflect on what our minds can choose to do with the many ways of looking at life? Are we in control of our responses? How we look at what has or is happening to us can make us decide what reality is. I am going to try to be far more mindful of what thoughts I attach to and which ones I let pass.
We are amazing creatures, us human beings. Let's use what we are good at to the best possible levels of positive assistance.
Have a great day.
S
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YES. 0
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i agree as well! yes! i like your ideas, Shel. i didn't say they were easy but i LIKE them
someone once said the best things in life are the ones you work hard for. or something like that. i'm not eloquent today, lol.
you have a great day too. whichever day you read this 0 -
Amazing how this thread pops up just when I need it! I'm fighting the dark pit now. I did so well all summer but I think my SAD is rearing it's ugly head. I've been using light therapy since August but just living has become so difficult. I was enjoying my walks but now it takes everything I have to force myself to get out. I'm even posting on here to delay getting out. I hate these feelings of hopelessness and failure. As a previous poster commented, "no one can say things to be that are crueler than what I'm telling myself." Oh well, I've lucked out and have my every three month appointment with my psychiatrist tomorrow. May be time to go up on meds and I'm making bets he will want to see me sooner than 3 months from now. Thanks for being here.0
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I came back to say that I DID walk. Thanks for the incentive.1
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shelleygold wrote: »Hi Everyone,
Is there a space between rain drops? Is there an instant between the thoughts are brains generate? Can we slow our thinking down, just long enough, to reflect on what our minds can choose to do with the many ways of looking at life? Are we in control of our responses? How we look at what has or is happening to us can make us decide what reality is. I am going to try to be far more mindful of what thoughts I attach to and which ones I let pass.
We are amazing creatures, us human beings. Let's use what we are good at to the best possible levels of positive assistance.
Have a great day.
S
Amazing words in which I needed. Have had a very hard few days. Crying at the drop of a hat. Mind racing...panic and anxiety for which seems there is no reason. I just wish there were an instant I could just not focus on these things. force myself not to worry or be down if even for just that..an instant. I have come to the conclusion I am for this week no longer at one day at a time...I have it brought down to 15 minutes at a time...it is still progress and it seems to help. Thank you all for being here. Try to enjoy your Day...and know because of you guys I will be as well...a few minutes at a time.....0 -
cerise_noir wrote: »I've been feeling as if I am drowning lately. I can't seem to get out of it...feeling lost.
I have a lot going on at the moment and feel very overwhelmed.
i agree. find a friend, a confidant or maybe therapy? i can say i was here before and it put me in such a state that i physically felt it every day for months. i was weak. i had been going to therapy for a few months but just to talk....and then one day instead of talking about what was happening in life, i told her how i really felt about life. it has helped tremendously.0
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