Friends with benefits

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  • drbuzzard91
    drbuzzard91 Posts: 1,204 Member
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    *slow chanting quietly* get the d, get the d, get the d, *building to a dole roar* Get The D, Get The D *Loud stadium chanting in full applause* GET THE D! GET THE D! GET THE D!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • chamzlila
    chamzlila Posts: 189 Member
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    drbuzzard91 wrote: »
    *slow chanting quietly* get the d, get the d, get the d, *building to a dole roar* Get The D, Get The D *Loud stadium chanting in full applause* GET THE D! GET THE D! GET THE D!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    So you are leaning towards no...
  • Verchild
    Verchild Posts: 866 Member
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    bemyyfriend0918 wrote: »
    chamzlila wrote: »
    I think people are getting confused with a booty call and a fwb. The key word is friend

    So you want a friend who you sleep with, hang out with, and who isn't seeing anyone else?

    Thats a relationship.

    I am not understanding what the difference is. You want someone to hang out with, have sex with, talk to, and someone faithful to you....but you don't want to have Christmas dinner at his parent's house?? Is that what the difference is? Because im 25, and I can tell you that everyone i've ever met in a FWB relationship uses that term to hang out and sleep with multiple people at the same time...otherwise they would just call it a relationship..

    I can't argue this logic. If this guy you are spending time with is cool with you and him being physical, and you can deal with him going off and dating other people and being physical with them. Then sure, FWB works for you in this situation. I know you both said you wouldn't do that... but honestly think about it if he was. Would it matter?

    If that thought bothers you, then don't do it. It comes back to all of this being too soon.
  • dbanks80
    dbanks80 Posts: 3,685 Member
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    denversillygoose wrote: »
    Cutaway_Collar wrote: »
    OP, you are getting some solid advice here. I agree with the naysayers. Don't do it. You can still have a monogamous outing with a dude without the long term commitment.... like the serial daters.

    Sleeping with multiple people at the same time is a little effed up. It only takes a toll on self-esteem and causes a void that takes time to repair.

    In my experience, the purpose of the FWB was monogamous sex without the strings or commitment of a relationship. It's not about sleeping around, it's about living your single life, but still getting your rocks off with someone you trust.

    I don't understand how you can have committed sex without being in a relationship.
  • kevinf2380
    kevinf2380 Posts: 256 Member
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    I'd say do it if you make 5 word rule every time you meet up. None of the words can be questions about getting to know one another. You might want start with. "Do you have any diseases? You only say 5 words to each other and anything else would be about what you want in the bedroom.
  • rps67
    rps67 Posts: 163 Member
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    I had a fwb once that was the best. He may have just been a booty call since we didn't have a lot in common but I really thought a lot of him. I didn't want to be in a relationship so that was perfect for me.

    I'd kill for a fwb now.
  • NorthCascades
    NorthCascades Posts: 10,968 Member
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    dbanks80 wrote: »
    It's obvious men view sex purely as a physical act. They don't have to be emotionally involved to have it. Women are emotionally driven so if we have sex even if we think it's just "FWB" eventually our emotions will get involved. So therefore DONT do it.

    This is the most sexist thing I've read on this site yet.
  • T0M_K
    T0M_K Posts: 7,526 Member
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    rps67 wrote: »
    I had a fwb once that was the best. He may have just been a booty call since we didn't have a lot in common but I really thought a lot of him. I didn't want to be in a relationship so that was perfect for me.

    I'd kill for a fwb now.

    ;) lol
  • AskTracyAnnK28
    AskTracyAnnK28 Posts: 2,817 Member
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    @rps67 's inbox is about to get flooded with roosters right now....
  • VanishingNachos
    VanishingNachos Posts: 5,688 Member
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    I could never be a FWB dude. Hell - women fall in love with me while im in the line at the bank forchristsake~
  • T0M_K
    T0M_K Posts: 7,526 Member
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    VanishingNachos wrote: »
    I could never be a FWB dude. Hell - women fall in love with me while im in the line at the bank forchristsake~

    must be your modesty that they just can't resist.
  • Verchild
    Verchild Posts: 866 Member
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    AskTracyAnnK28 wrote: »
    @rps67 's inbox is about to get flooded with roosters right now....

    BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, omg, I was just about to say the same thing.
  • Wizeman22
    Wizeman22 Posts: 552 Member
    edited August 2016
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    Live your life to the fullest, so you can see what you want in life. Do not hold back because life is too short to be over analysising your situation. Do what makes you happy and do not worry about what other people think because we are had our different experiences, which led to us being the person that we are today.

    My name is Wizeman22 and I approve this message!
  • VanishingNachos
    VanishingNachos Posts: 5,688 Member
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    Tomk652015 wrote: »
    VanishingNachos wrote: »
    I could never be a FWB dude. Hell - women fall in love with me while im in the line at the bank forchristsake~

    must be your modesty that they just can't resist.

    yeah - that must be it - lol
  • chamzlila
    chamzlila Posts: 189 Member
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    rps67 wrote: »
    I had a fwb once that was the best. He may have just been a booty call since we didn't have a lot in common but I really thought a lot of him. I didn't want to be in a relationship so that was perfect for me.

    I'd kill for a fwb now.

    Love ❤️
  • denversillygoose
    denversillygoose Posts: 708 Member
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    dbanks80 wrote: »
    denversillygoose wrote: »
    Cutaway_Collar wrote: »
    OP, you are getting some solid advice here. I agree with the naysayers. Don't do it. You can still have a monogamous outing with a dude without the long term commitment.... like the serial daters.

    Sleeping with multiple people at the same time is a little effed up. It only takes a toll on self-esteem and causes a void that takes time to repair.

    In my experience, the purpose of the FWB was monogamous sex without the strings or commitment of a relationship. It's not about sleeping around, it's about living your single life, but still getting your rocks off with someone you trust.

    I don't understand how you can have committed sex without being in a relationship.

    Because it was only hanging out like once a week for the funsies. The rest of my time was all mine. No presumed Friday night dates, no sleeping over, no waiting for "the next step". He was still someone that was really fun to hang with, but he was on the same page.

    It's really like any other non traditional sexual situation. It works for some and not others. It doesn't have to be over complicated and there doesn't have to be a definitive answer.
  • salembambi
    salembambi Posts: 5,585 Member
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    FWB are great

    i suggest you get a couple of them

  • Timshel_
    Timshel_ Posts: 22,834 Member
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    The only friends with benefits I needs are strong portfolios and good medical.
  • grinning_chick
    grinning_chick Posts: 765 Member
    edited August 2016
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    If you can find a bonafide FWB, have at it I say. Unfortunately, except for one awesome but unfortunately short term true FWB all I ever ran across were dudes looking for free sex with no interest in actually being friends. No thanks. I did try the one off / FB route a handful of times to give it the benefit of the doubt. It was some of the worst, awkward, unsatisfiying sex I've ever had.

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