Support from significant other...
rebaisett
Posts: 62 Member
Was curious to know how your significant other is supporting or not supporting you. I am so incredibly lucky and I know it. My husband has never had to worry about his weight. Lucky him. Anyway, every time I go on my weight loss journey he always has my back and is very encouraging. Would love to here your thoughts.
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My hubby has been great in every way, making an nice side salad every single night for dinner and encouraging me in all aspects, including running which he loathes. He's undertaken his own weight loss & fitness journey as well. I hope this becomes a POSITIVE thread!!5
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My hubby has been great in every way, making an nice side salad every single night for dinner and encouraging me in all aspects, including running which he loathes. He's undertaken his own weight loss & fitness journey as well. I hope this becomes a POSITIVE thread!!
I love hearing that! Makes me so sad when I hear that the significant other isn't supportive:(0 -
My husband is an emotionless hole. Not in any way supportive or caring. Sad part is I have turned off my feelings in an effort not to let it bother me anymore.5
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ThatUserNameIsAllReadyTaken wrote: »My husband is an emotionless hole. Not in any way supportive or caring. Sad part is I have turned off my feelings in an effort not to let it bother me anymore.
That really breaks my heart to hear. I will support you! I know it's not the same but I will be here for you.1 -
My hubs met me just as I was at the tail end of losing weight. He was onboard then, and has supported me the last 14 or so years in maintenance. Whatever I say about MY eating, goes. He's on board. Period.7
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This is awesome :-) my husband has been supportive in his own ways. When I'm feeling like cheating he reminds me gently why I'm doing this ect. And has even cooked me a couple meals which is a big deal in my household as he never cooks lol.3
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Thank you all for sharing your stories:)0
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My SO is somewhat supportive. He will eat the junkfood I buy so I can't eat it (lol), if cooking veges he will help me weigh items an will eat what I cook for him. However he won't cook healthy - adds loads of butter, oil, cheese etc. I got to my weight by eating as much as him and eating what he eats. Plus no exercise. Now I just have to accept i will cook everything an he 'helps' or I eat what he cooks an prepare for more calories.
He's lucky to have a physical job and to eat an drink whatever he wants.
I'm trying at the moment to get him to do the couch 2 5 k. More so for company..3 -
Maybe slowly not buy the junk food. I didn't go "cold turkey ". I think by making the smallest changes leads to bigger ones. Then it will become second nature. You won't even want that junk. I'm happy that he is making an effort to support youAthomemermaid wrote: »My SO is somewhat supportive. He will eat the junkfood I buy so I can't eat it (lol), if cooking veges he will help me weigh items an will eat what I cook for him. However he won't cook healthy - adds loads of butter, oil, cheese etc. I got to my weight by eating as much as him and eating what he eats. Plus no exercise. Now I just have to accept i will cook everything an he 'helps' or I eat what he cooks an prepare for more calories.
He's lucky to have a physical job and to eat an drink whatever he wants.
I'm trying at the moment to get him to do the couch 2 5 k. More so for company..
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My DH makes sacrifices so that I can work out. Helps find the $ for gym memberships, watches the kids alone on his day off so I can do a long hike. Hikes & swims along with me & the kids. When he's cooking & serving he measures. Listens as enthusiastically as he can when I blather about weight loss or fitness. He even has good suggestions - he once suggested that I take a break from a deficit every few months in order to practice maintenance & that has worked really well for me. His compliments are along the lines of "You're looking very athletic." He's a good partner & friend to me among all the other stuff.17
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My DH makes sacrifices so that I can work out. Helps find the $ for gym memberships, watches the kids alone on his day off so I can do a long hike. Hikes & swims along with me & the kids. When he's cooking & serving he measures. Listens as enthusiastically as he can when I blather about weight loss or fitness. He even has good suggestions - he once suggested that I take a break from a deficit every few months in order to practice maintenance & that has worked really well for me. His compliments are along the lines of "You're looking very athletic." He's a good partner & friend to me among all the other stuff.
That's awesome!!0 -
Hubby rubs my butt after a particularly hard leg day at the gym. That is worth its weight in gold. Oh and he does all the other supportive type things.10
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My DH makes sacrifices so that I can work out. Helps find the $ for gym memberships, watches the kids alone on his day off so I can do a long hike. Hikes & swims along with me & the kids. When he's cooking & serving he measures. Listens as enthusiastically as he can when I blather about weight loss or fitness. He even has good suggestions - he once suggested that I take a break from a deficit every few months in order to practice maintenance & that has worked really well for me. His compliments are along the lines of "You're looking very athletic." He's a good partner & friend to me among all the other stuff.
I would say mine is similar. He always comments on how "fit" I look. He listens actively when I describe whatever yoga move I'm working on. He fully supports my work out schedule, even as it changes. Granted, I actively look at his bike rides on his garmin account etc. We work well together.4 -
Yes!Chef_Barbell wrote: »Hubby rubs my butt after a particularly hard leg day at the gym. That is worth its weight in gold. Oh and he does all the other supportive type things.
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He is really good and has made me feel good no matter what size I have been at. We like to cook together a lot. He doesn't weigh or measure his food like I do or eat as strict as I do, but he makes a point to eat pretty healthy. Well, except for his beers. We don't keep too much junk food around which is good because I don't have so much willpower once it's in the house. He does. We don't work out together, but we are both pretty active, early morning people, and support each other, so it works.4
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ThatUserNameIsAllReadyTaken wrote: »My husband is an emotionless hole. Not in any way supportive or caring. Sad part is I have turned off my feelings in an effort not to let it bother me anymore.
That's sad.3 -
I forgot to book mark this discussion. I wasn't intentionally overlooking replies! Sorry!
Anyhoo, one thing that irks me is I was pretty well on the wagon. Trying to keep my appetite and cravings under control, I was a good week into it and ready to dive head first into the refrigerator. He went to Wendy's around 11 pm. Brought the delicious smelling food home and sat on the foot of the bed eating it while watching TV. I wanted to club him, snatch the fries and run. LOL! He refused to go eat the food in the living room in front of the other TV. Aside from getting dirty looks when he sees me in any state of undress etc... I appreciate the replies to my own comment. Thank you! It's good to vent a little bit for a change.5 -
My husband is the same...it is sad. I do this for myself and for my son.
You are not alone. You can do this and I believe in you! :-)ThatUserNameIsAllReadyTaken wrote: »My husband is an emotionless hole. Not in any way supportive or caring. Sad part is I have turned off my feelings in an effort not to let it bother me anymore.
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ThatUserNameIsAllReadyTaken wrote: »I forgot to book mark this discussion. I wasn't intentionally overlooking replies! Sorry!
Anyhoo, one thing that irks me is I was pretty well on the wagon. Trying to keep my appetite and cravings under control, I was a good week into it and ready to dive head first into the refrigerator. He went to Wendy's around 11 pm. Brought the delicious smelling food home and sat on the foot of the bed eating it while watching TV. I wanted to club him, snatch the fries and run. LOL! He refused to go eat the food in the living room in front of the other TV. Aside from getting dirty looks when he sees me in any state of undress etc... I appreciate the replies to my own comment. Thank you! It's good to vent a little bit for a change.
This is slightly off topic, but bookmark this: http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/profile/comments/ThatUserNameIsAllReadyTaken
Then you can easily see all the threads you're participating in.
Sorry he's a jerk.1 -
ThatUserNameIsAllReadyTaken wrote: »I forgot to book mark this discussion. I wasn't intentionally overlooking replies! Sorry!
Anyhoo, one thing that irks me is I was pretty well on the wagon. Trying to keep my appetite and cravings under control, I was a good week into it and ready to dive head first into the refrigerator. He went to Wendy's around 11 pm. Brought the delicious smelling food home and sat on the foot of the bed eating it while watching TV. I wanted to club him, snatch the fries and run. LOL! He refused to go eat the food in the living room in front of the other TV. Aside from getting dirty looks when he sees me in any state of undress etc... I appreciate the replies to my own comment. Thank you! It's good to vent a little bit for a change.
That's so hard! I wish I had some words of wisdom or something…0 -
Sabine_Stroehm wrote: »ThatUserNameIsAllReadyTaken wrote: »I forgot to book mark this discussion. I wasn't intentionally overlooking replies! Sorry!
Anyhoo, one thing that irks me is I was pretty well on the wagon. Trying to keep my appetite and cravings under control, I was a good week into it and ready to dive head first into the refrigerator. He went to Wendy's around 11 pm. Brought the delicious smelling food home and sat on the foot of the bed eating it while watching TV. I wanted to club him, snatch the fries and run. LOL! He refused to go eat the food in the living room in front of the other TV. Aside from getting dirty looks when he sees me in any state of undress etc... I appreciate the replies to my own comment. Thank you! It's good to vent a little bit for a change.
This is slightly off topic, but bookmark this: http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/profile/comments/ThatUserNameIsAllReadyTaken
Then you can easily see all the threads you're participating in.
Sorry he's a jerk.
Thank you! I appreciate that. I am kind of a brain donor and I also get too many irons in the fire bouncing around the site that I forget to look for these features. Thanks again!0 -
AllSpiceNice wrote: »My husband is the same...it is sad. I do this for myself and for my son.
You are not alone. You can do this and I believe in you! :-)ThatUserNameIsAllReadyTaken wrote: »My husband is an emotionless hole. Not in any way supportive or caring. Sad part is I have turned off my feelings in an effort not to let it bother me anymore.
Thank you! I think I have been looking at it all wrong. I could use it to fuel me instead of defeat me. Time to change how I see it!3 -
ThatUserNameIsAllReadyTaken wrote: »I forgot to book mark this discussion. I wasn't intentionally overlooking replies! Sorry!
Anyhoo, one thing that irks me is I was pretty well on the wagon. Trying to keep my appetite and cravings under control, I was a good week into it and ready to dive head first into the refrigerator. He went to Wendy's around 11 pm. Brought the delicious smelling food home and sat on the foot of the bed eating it while watching TV. I wanted to club him, snatch the fries and run. LOL! He refused to go eat the food in the living room in front of the other TV. Aside from getting dirty looks when he sees me in any state of undress etc... I appreciate the replies to my own comment. Thank you! It's good to vent a little bit for a change.
Man, dirty looks while you get undressed or dressed? I am hugely pregnant and that would devastate me. I probably would punch him in the face. That is rough.5 -
We had to change quite a bit about our lifestyle when I started my diet, but my husband has been rock solid supportive. We stopped going out to eat so much, going to bars as much, and got rid of all junk food in the house. We started spending more time outdoors, and doing things like movies and kayaking instead of going to bars.
If he wants something that will be tempting to me, he'll have it when I'm not home, too. The oone thing he does keep at home is a bag of Dove chocolates. They're in a freezer in the basement. He'll have a couple at night sometimes. He asked if I'd be ok with that, and I am.
He's a personal trainer and already in good shape, but since I started eating better, he has as well so he's lost a few pounds and looks even better now.
And, he has gotten super good at helping me think through cravings and how to handle them. Most of the time he can discern if I need water, electrolytes, etc., or if I should indulge a little so I don't binge later.
His support has kept me going when I wanted to quit.8 -
Chef_Barbell wrote: »ThatUserNameIsAllReadyTaken wrote: »I forgot to book mark this discussion. I wasn't intentionally overlooking replies! Sorry!
Anyhoo, one thing that irks me is I was pretty well on the wagon. Trying to keep my appetite and cravings under control, I was a good week into it and ready to dive head first into the refrigerator. He went to Wendy's around 11 pm. Brought the delicious smelling food home and sat on the foot of the bed eating it while watching TV. I wanted to club him, snatch the fries and run. LOL! He refused to go eat the food in the living room in front of the other TV. Aside from getting dirty looks when he sees me in any state of undress etc... I appreciate the replies to my own comment. Thank you! It's good to vent a little bit for a change.
Man, dirty looks while you get undressed or dressed? I am hugely pregnant and that would devastate me. I probably would punch him in the face. That is rough.
I have a cast iron pan I keep telling my self is better for grilling chicken in than smacking him with!
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My hubby is a sabotager, and often makes me feel guilty for working out....however isn't it my job to not allow myself the ice cream when offered? I can only blame myself.1
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My hubby is a sabotager, and often makes me feel guilty for working out....however isn't it my job to not allow myself the ice cream when offered? I can only blame myself.
I think we use the word "sabotage" differently. To me, offering someone ice cream isn't sabotage. It's perhaps not very thoughtful, but it's not sabotage.1 -
My hubby is a sabotager, and often makes me feel guilty for working out....however isn't it my job to not allow myself the ice cream when offered? I can only blame myself.
This makes me angry to hear. I am sorry that he does that to you. You are a human being and likely are prone to moments of weakness. Maybe next time he offers you ice cream just grit your teeth and walk away. Maybe head to the store for something that is within your allowance. Maybe one of those little single serve cups? I sometimes get one of those if I am having a PMS kind of day and just can't hold back any longer. I hope he comes around and stops doing that to you either way.3 -
The only thing he really said when I first set out to lose a lot of weight (over 60lbs), was that I didnt need to do anything, but if I wanted to, he would support, but didn't want to police me. He said, "You're an adult. If you want a cookie, have a cookie. But then I don't want to hear about it that you're so bad for eating a cookie." I could appreciate that. I think the only fight we really had about food was the day he threw out my cookie butter. To be fair, I had already thrown a half empty jar in the trash. He took out the trash. I went back for it (yeah, I'm gross, but it was in a closed jar and...it's cookie butter!!). And the trash was gone and a fresh bag in. I started screaming that he threw out my cookie butter. He was staring at me like huh?? and like I was crazy and said, "But it was in the trash??" I screamed, "But it's cookie butter, of course I'm going to go back for it." And he was like, "yeah, you're a freakin psycho" but I may have deserved that one.
But overall, he kind of lets me just do my thing with this. I'm sure I annoy him at times how I have to weigh everything before I cook it, but he rolls with it. And there are some things I don't normally have, but if he uses regular cooking spray instead of coconut oil spray, or not organic eggs, it's not like I'm not going to eat it. I have him pretty trained - he will text me nutrition labels at the grocery store asking if something is okay to buy, but even if he comes home with something not ideal, I still get thrilled he tries so hard.
I feel like in a lot of ways a healthier lifestyle has brought us closer together because now we take walks together and go on vacations where we can go hiking or ride bikes, and just make a point to do more active things than just eating out and drinking.3
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