Husband cheated on me here

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Replies

  • Sooothathappened
    Sooothathappened Posts: 38 Member
    @Cutaway_Collar if only. The only pot I'm stirring is mine.
  • SomebodyWakeUpHIcks
    SomebodyWakeUpHIcks Posts: 3,836 Member
    @friction_thighs wrote: »
    I was just in the mood for some flirting, kik'ing and DP viewing. But I'm not in the mood now after reading this. Think I'll just go to bed with a good book.

    Now hang on, don't be so hasty.
  • Sooothathappened
    Sooothathappened Posts: 38 Member
    @Cutaway_Collar no offense taken... thank you for the honesty
  • SomebodyWakeUpHIcks
    SomebodyWakeUpHIcks Posts: 3,836 Member
    @Sooothathappened wrote: »
    One last thing before I have to delete all of this for my mental sanity....

    I did message one of the women on here right after I found out... and she called me "hun" while denying everything. I figured she was actually telling me the truth until my husband insisted it was her and she knew he was married cause she told him she was married, too. So I told her as a courtesy I wanted her to know that I was going to tell her husband. She deleted her acct after that.
    I felt guilty for going there but it did give me a little satisfaction.

    Only mods can delete a thread so unless you got some mad MFP skillz, which is would seem unusally for someone who had their first forum post an hour ago, you may want to request it to be deleted.
  • Sooothathappened
    Sooothathappened Posts: 38 Member
    @SomebodyWakeUpHIcks well I guess it will be here fo a while then
  • RoxieDawn
    RoxieDawn Posts: 15,488 Member
    Jackie0Marie wrote: »
    We getting names or nah?



    (Ps. I'm in just for my two cents on the lab advice. Go to a pound or a lab rescue. I have two lab-pit mixes. They are the best. <3 )

    3 labs here.. I can third on the lab advice..


    I have been wating on names too.. sigh :'(
  • leanjogreen18
    leanjogreen18 Posts: 2,492 Member
    edited April 2017
    Cutaway_Collar wrote: »
    Milady, my apologies if I offended, I can understand it can be hard.

    My recommendation - just work with your husband and resolve it. But my bet is that he will do it again. Take care.

    Pretty much why I mentioned to discuss the definition of cheating for each of you OP. You feel its cheating he doesn't. He def knew it was hurtful since he snuck around but if he came clean on his own he may not feel its cheating.

    Have the conversation and see what comes out of it if your relationship is worth saving. BUT I agree with Cutaway sorta in that trust is hard to get back so even if he did/didn't do anything again you may always have it in the back of your mind. Only you know what you can live with so to speak.

    Again best of luck!
  • ThatUserNameIsAllReadyTaken
    ThatUserNameIsAllReadyTaken Posts: 1,530 Member
    I'm sorry this happened to you. There are always those threads posted that draw people in for pretty much that reason. Married and otherwise committed people would be wise to avoid those discussions. I hope you get this all smoothed out in your life. Trust is a hard thing to rebuild.
  • Sooothathappened
    Sooothathappened Posts: 38 Member
    @lstrat115 I signed up here when I found out. We've been separated and in therapy ever since.
  • Sooothathappened
    Sooothathappened Posts: 38 Member
    @jessiferrrb thank you for the kindness... I suppose I'm fine with just leaving it floating around cyberspace... but I will reach out to a moderater... thanks
  • Sooothathappened
    Sooothathappened Posts: 38 Member
    @newmeadow sex addiction by way of porn and sexting is the diagnosis
  • SomebodyWakeUpHIcks
    SomebodyWakeUpHIcks Posts: 3,836 Member
    edited April 2017
    @Sooothathappened wrote: »
    @lstrat115 I signed up here when I found out. We've been separated and in therapy ever since.

    Wait you signed up 8 months ago when you found out and just now posted about it? Did your therapist suggest you post about it?

    I'm confused.
  • Sunna_W
    Sunna_W Posts: 744 Member
    A lot of men are dogs... and they don't think that virtual sexting or nude videos are even cheating. Does he know what he did was wrong? Is he sorry or just sorry that he got caught? So what can you do? Can you spring for the nuclear option and leave? (I worked outside the home and that's what I did. It took me years to recover financially, from the divorce, but I did. A lot of women are scared to leave, and, think they can't make it -- but they can and they do.) In the old days when this happened, women "went home to mother" for a while. Is that an option? Will he go to marriage counseling? Is it worth it? Do you have kids? Ann Landers / Dear Abby would say, "Can you live without him?" So sorry that this happened to you. <3
  • RoxieDawn
    RoxieDawn Posts: 15,488 Member
    SomebodyWakeUpHIcks wrote: »
    @Sooothathappened wrote: »
    @lstrat115 I signed up here when I found out. We've been separated and in therapy ever since.

    Wait you signed up 8 months ago when you found out and just now posted about it? Did your therapist suggest you post about it?

    I'm confused.

    I was born at night, but not last night. quite a few things do not add up.. hoping more posting would revealz ;)
  • Sooothathappened
    Sooothathappened Posts: 38 Member
    edited April 2017
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  • Unknown
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  • leanjogreen18
    leanjogreen18 Posts: 2,492 Member
    Cutaway_Collar wrote: »
    Sending nudes is definitely cheating.

    You should be able to let the spouse read and not cause any friction. That is the definition of innocent interaction.

    I don't wanna judge the folks who play around here. Just the times we live in. Everyone makes mistakes. Key factor here is reconciliation and consideration for the spouse.

    Will it break their heart and make them cry? That vision should be in front of every person. That would be the biggest deterrent. But then different individuals have different outlooks on life.

    I happen to strongly think so too, but not everyone does as your last sentence suggests. Nor does her husband, BUT that doesn't mean he can't come to a different understanding that what he did was cheating eventually.



  • Sunna_W
    Sunna_W Posts: 744 Member
    made my night, either way!
  • Sooothathappened
    Sooothathappened Posts: 38 Member
    edited April 2017
    ...
  • nightengale7
    nightengale7 Posts: 563 Member
    Sooothathappened wrote: »
    @SomebodyWakeUpHIcks it was crazy to me too. I hadn't told anyone the complete truth until last week. my therapist is having me practice Exposure Therapy...

    I'm thinking it will help you to understand that what happened isn't your fault, that you have nothing to feel guilty for or ashamed about. Let it all out!
  • Sooothathappened
    Sooothathappened Posts: 38 Member
    edited April 2017
    ...
  • RoxieDawn
    RoxieDawn Posts: 15,488 Member
    Sooothathappened wrote: »
    @RoxieDawn unfortunately this is pretty much it... just a sad, pathetic reality

    Is creating this thread part of the exposure therapy?
  • IVMay
    IVMay Posts: 442 Member
    edited April 2017
    RoxieDawn wrote: »
    Jackie0Marie wrote: »
    We getting names or nah?



    (Ps. I'm in just for my two cents on the lab advice. Go to a pound or a lab rescue. I have two lab-pit mixes. They are the best. <3 )

    3 labs here.. I can third on the lab advice..


    I have been wating on names too.. sigh :'(

    Excellent.
    I have a dream. One day this forum will have a lab thread where all the poor little puppies can bark and run riot.
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