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Fat Acceptance Movement
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evergreenlake wrote: »I think there are people who just want to learn to love themselves and create an environment where others who are overweight can as well.
But I think it's also easy as someone who is not overweight, and has never been overweight, to forget that the first step to being healthy for ANYONE is that you have to love yourself and care enough about yourself to start the journey to be a healthier you. It's easy to see people who don't look healthy and think they aren't trying, but that's not always true, and we have no idea what that person has been through, is going through, or is working on in their life.
Sometimes I have to remind myself of that.
All true but the problem is these individuals think that they need to "accept" their fat in order to love themselves. They don't. We are not defined by our weight. It is one of many characteristics about a person. I'm a nice guy, my friends and family and husband all love me. I'm also fat. I can accept that I'm a nice guy. I don't have to accept that I'm a nice fat guy because if I stay fat, I won't stay nice...or alive...for very long.6 -
SiegfriedXXL wrote: »evergreenlake wrote: »I think there are people who just want to learn to love themselves and create an environment where others who are overweight can as well.
But I think it's also easy as someone who is not overweight, and has never been overweight, to forget that the first step to being healthy for ANYONE is that you have to love yourself and care enough about yourself to start the journey to be a healthier you. It's easy to see people who don't look healthy and think they aren't trying, but that's not always true, and we have no idea what that person has been through, is going through, or is working on in their life.
Sometimes I have to remind myself of that.
All true but the problem is these individuals think that they need to "accept" their fat in order to love themselves. They don't. We are not defined by our weight. It is one of many characteristics about a person. I'm a nice guy, my friends and family and husband all love me. I'm also fat. I can accept that I'm a nice guy. I don't have to accept that I'm a nice fat guy because if I stay fat, I won't stay nice...or alive...for very long.
I don't see the point of assuming what people think. There are as many opinions in the FA movement as there are people in the FA movement. You can accept your fat while actively making healthier choices in your life.5 -
MJ2victory wrote: »SiegfriedXXL wrote: »evergreenlake wrote: »I think there are people who just want to learn to love themselves and create an environment where others who are overweight can as well.
But I think it's also easy as someone who is not overweight, and has never been overweight, to forget that the first step to being healthy for ANYONE is that you have to love yourself and care enough about yourself to start the journey to be a healthier you. It's easy to see people who don't look healthy and think they aren't trying, but that's not always true, and we have no idea what that person has been through, is going through, or is working on in their life.
Sometimes I have to remind myself of that.
All true but the problem is these individuals think that they need to "accept" their fat in order to love themselves. They don't. We are not defined by our weight. It is one of many characteristics about a person. I'm a nice guy, my friends and family and husband all love me. I'm also fat. I can accept that I'm a nice guy. I don't have to accept that I'm a nice fat guy because if I stay fat, I won't stay nice...or alive...for very long.
I don't see the point of assuming what people think. There are as many opinions in the FA movement as there are people in the FA movement. You can accept your fat while actively making healthier choices in your life.
Meh, sure I can qualify my opinion as purely anecdotal but I've yet to engage with a FActivist who didn't tell me that I needed to accept that I was a large individual and not worry about losing weight. Also surprisingly, they never mentioned health. They just wanted me to say I'm proud of being fat and flip the bird to the world.
I don't think it's healthy to be proud of, or accept, being fat. In fact, loving yourself would mean wanting to make healthier choices, as you state, but also wanting those choices to result in weight loss.11 -
peckchris3267 wrote: »
Haha funny meme to go with it! That makes me happy to see this line finally getting the joke it deserves. Although, the first time I heard that line it stuck with me and made me feel bad since I was 13. I've always been thin and when I heard things like that being drilled into society it affected me. Body positivity doesn't need to be negative one way to be positive the other.
Also, on a separate note, I've noticed my whole life that people are much more comfortable commenting on small people's sizes than larger people. My friends (who really don't mean any harm and I understand that) comment on my size daily. I'm called a twig, a stick, a 'beanpole', told that I 'eat like a bird' even though i take extra care to make sure I eat enough. These comments hurt, even though people don't notice. It seems to be taboo to even mention some larger's size unless its something positive like 'real women have curves'.13 -
peckchris3267 wrote: »
Haha funny meme to go with it! That makes me happy to see this line finally getting the joke it deserves. Although, the first time I heard that line it stuck with me and made me feel bad since I was 13. I've always been thin and when I heard things like that being drilled into society it affected me. Body positivity doesn't need to be negative one way to be positive the other.
Also, on a separate note, I've noticed my whole life that people are much more comfortable commenting on small people's sizes than larger people. My friends (who really don't mean any harm and I understand that) comment on my size daily. I'm called a twig, a stick, a 'beanpole', told that I 'eat like a bird' even though i take extra care to make sure I eat enough. These comments hurt, even though people don't notice. It seems to be taboo to even mention some larger's size unless its something positive like 'real women have curves'.
I'm sorry you deal with those kinds of comments regularly. They're new to me & I can't stand them.
I was overweight/obese from age 17 until last year, at age 38, I lost over 55# (close to 100# if we're counting my highest weight ever). While I was fat, I (fortunately) never received negative comments about my body/weight. Since I've lost weight & am at a normal, healthy weight (the median of my BMI range for my height), it's like open season on body comments, both positive & negative. It makes me so uncomfortable & I've had to address it a couple of times, much to the mutual discomfort of the offender.
What's disturbing though, is when one who is fit, thin or skinny discusses these issues & discomforts, it's sometimes met with eye-rolls & a "skinny-girl problems" attitude, or the classic "must be a nice problem to have."
Apparently, Legitimate Body Shaming is isolated to the overweight or obese crowds.8 -
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no one should be shammed 4 ther size we are all beautiful no matter what others say3
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I think there's a difference between loving yourself and trying to be healthy, and saying "I'm going to stay fat because society can't tell me what to do." I have always been overweight, but I've also always been an athlete, so my weight was mostly okay because a percentage of it was muscle when I played softball. So, I am acknowledging that one can be stocky (As I was/am) without being unhealthy. The issue with this movement is that it's enabling truly unhealthy people to remain in their lifestyle without changing anything. I know a few people who subscribe to this line of thinking and I can see the damage it's doing to their health. They have trouble doing a lot of simple things and get sick a lot, but they don't see it as damaging. They believe they're empowering themselves.
To me, the better way to think of it is, be positive about your body as a Being, and strive to make that Being as healthy as possible. Take care of it and treat it well, and it will love you back. There's nothing wrong with loving yourself, but you shouldn't sit back and say, "Society can't make me lose weight. I'm going to remain in my unhealthy ways because I don't like being dictated."
Of course it's also really evil to shame people for being fat, which I would never condone. As someone who's always been overweight, I know the pain that kind of experience brings, especially as a young girl. Instead I think we just need to treat each other with the dignity human beings deserve.5 -
I wonder if people would react differently if we replaced overweight with debt?9
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richardgavel wrote: »I wonder if people would react differently if we replaced overweight with debt?
Pretty similar breakdown I imagine. Think a majority would be in the "Life's Lottery" camp. The victim mentality is a powerful drug.7 -
I don't think it really matters if someone is decently overweight unless the person has kids or pets who are dependent on them and their weight impedes on their ability to be their for their family (i.e. inability to walk dogs, play with cats/kids, walk with kids etc. or causes serious health issues that can be managed to ensure they are around for their family and don't plop dead or require their family to become caretakers).0
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" Beauty is only skin deep..... but ugly goes clean to the bone."3
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I don't think it really matters if someone is decently overweight unless the person has kids or pets who are dependent on them and their weight impedes on their ability to be their for their family (i.e. inability to walk dogs, play with cats/kids, walk with kids etc. or causes serious health issues that can be managed to ensure they are around for their family and don't plop dead or require their family to become caretakers).
What about when the government needs to pick up the tab for health issues,inability to work due to weight etc?1 -
R selected are not shame averse. k selected types are.0
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The big thing about the fat acceptance movement is not to judge someone or assume anything about them because of their size. Judge them if they're lazy and also happen to be fat, but not solely because they're fat.
Fat is a condition of being, affected by many physical and mental factors. And in today's world, those predisposed to obesity have greater access to the resources needed to become obese. Fighting that off requires great effort and potential medical intervention, to which many people do not have access to. Understanding obesity in the context of the world, as well as how fatphobia affects people of different genders and races differently, is the goal of fat acceptance.
Sometimes I feel not "woke" enough because I'm dieting; but I also know that when I was bigger there was not enough mental health support for me. Nobody asked why I gained weight, and I was very lonely. It took a lot to get me out of that hole. We have to treat fat on ourselves and others with kindness, and ask ourselves what we could possibly be contributing to the world by judging and shaming others solely based on their appearance.5 -
The big thing about the fat acceptance movement is not to judge someone or assume anything about them because of their size. Judge them if they're lazy and also happen to be fat, but not solely because they're fat.
Fat is a condition of being, affected by many physical and mental factors. And in today's world, those predisposed to obesity have greater access to the resources needed to become obese. Fighting that off requires great effort and potential medical intervention, to which many people do not have access to. Understanding obesity in the context of the world, as well as how fatphobia affects people of different genders and races differently, is the goal of fat acceptance.
Sometimes I feel not "woke" enough because I'm dieting; but I also know that when I was bigger there was not enough mental health support for me. Nobody asked why I gained weight, and I was very lonely. It took a lot to get me out of that hole. We have to treat fat on ourselves and others with kindness, and ask ourselves what we could possibly be contributing to the world by judging and shaming others solely based on their appearance.
To the bolded part of your post, I think that is precisely the main criticism with the fat acceptance movement many people have. If your personal decision to set a goal to diet to lose weight is somehow a betrayal of the fat acceptance movement, it has become harmful to you by putting a roadblock in making a decision for your own health.
I think pushing for recognizing the dignity and rights of people is a noble idea. Creating a group identity that discourages people from trying to improve their health and well being in a sensible way is just wrong.10 -
I look at the body shaming from a slightly different angle.
When I graduated high school I was 178 cm tall and weighed 52 kgs. That is a BMI of 16.4.
Even when I graduated university I weighed 56 kgs. (BMI 17.7)
Let’s just say I did not enjoy high school all that much.
It was not until I was late 20's that I started gaining weight, it was gradual just over a kg a year and at age 57 was 95 kgs. (BMI 30). I dropped 10 kgs and more or less kept it there for a few years and am now at 61years have a few kgs more to go to get to maintenance and muscle shaping /toning phases. (Target for fat loss is 70 kgs then I will add some muscle. Final target BMI 23 to 24 weight in the low 70's for maintenance)
I never comment on someone’s weight (or sexual orientation, or race or religion or any another attribute that is none of my business.) If the topic of weight loss comes up, I address it in terms of my experience and not in terms of shaming them because of their weight.
If anyone is OK with their weight then so am I. However I also reserve the right to be attracted to people who are on the leaner side and tend towards fitness. That means that I would not date an overweight (or underweight) person, because physical attractiveness is an important part of a relationship. To me that is not body shaming just my response to what I find attractive in a potential relationship. I realize I might miss out on knowing some wonderful people who are outside my ideal of the most attractive weight range, but if the physical attraction is not there it never will be.
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As I walk through this wicked world searching for light in the darkness of insanity, I ask myself is all hope lost? Is there only pain and hatred and misery? And each time I feel like this inside, theres one thing I want to know. Whats so funny bout peace love and understanding?3
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rankinsect wrote: »Well, I think some level of fat acceptance is necessary, in that if you are mired in depression and self-loathing, weight loss is far, far harder, because a key feature of depression is to lack the ability to imagine how things could be different. Depression itself is the worst kind of sabotage to any self-improvement.
That said, of course it's better to lose the weight - but for many of us, loving ourselves as we are goes hand in hand with being able to lose the weight; I don't see the two ideas in opposition. I was never successful at losing weight before I stopped hating myself for being obese.
this32
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