Guys who lift, getting advice from chicks...?
Options
Replies
-
TashaaaKayeee wrote: »I know I'm not a trainer but when I see a guy trying to do a deadlift with 100lbs & he's bending his back, I'm pretty sure with a past injury or not, he's going to mess up his back.
I'm hypermobile, I know full well my back rounds when I deadlift, I'm working hard to reduce the rounding but as I said I'm hypermobile. Oh and I work with a trainer who's helping me break the 100kg at the same time as strengthen my posterior chain. Similarly, when I squat my trainer wants me to stop just above parallel whenever I go above 50% bodyweight, I can squat atg, and do with lower weights, but he wants to protect my hypermobile joints and it's actually harder and takes more control for me to stop above parallel. (In body pump I do go right down bum to floor). Again I work with a PT and we've spent weeks working on my squat form.
As a woman if someone came along and tried to give me advice without being asked and told me how bad my form is (especially if they were effectively lifting half that I do) then I'd probably ignore them male or female, I wear headphones when I lift for a reason.Sorry, but this is a no tolerance issue for me, so I'm just going to back out now.
We now return you to your regularly scheduled thread.
i'm not sure what i said that seems to have upset you. I was pointing out that guys, especially most "gym guys" are likely to be kinda douchy. especially with regards to women in the gym. The number of times I've seen variations of "how do I hit on girls at the gym" conversations come up is mind numbing.
a woman approaching a guy in a gym just seems like a recipe for disaster
Maybe you're frequenting the wrong gym, the guys at my gym are friendly yes and will give advice if asked, but not in the least bit creepy or douchy.
3 -
I'm not sure where I come down on this, just because I train in martial arts and we tend to have a high turn of people and that's fine, but currently one of our trainers is in her final month of pregnancy and as one of the most experienced students with a high level of control, she has me pair with new people, guys/girls whoever, so that they can get the benefits of being with someone who knows what they're doing, can spot problems as they come up and can actually work with them, i.e. put two new people on the pads together, it's kind of ridiculous. Basically you're getting a better end of the deal that I am.
The problem is, some men take one look at me and decide that they, who are taking their first or second class, know better than I do despite me having been training for over 2 years and don't listen to me. I think know how to hold pads at this point, how to kick, how to move. And if I tell you to turn your foot out, you have to turn your foot out. Your body won't be in the right place otherwise. It also frustrates me because it's not even like I'm a small woman if that's what they're worried about. I'm lean, yes, but I'm almost 6' so you can check your 'weak woman' bull at the door.
So if the situation calls for it, as in I've been asked to help by a teacher -- who I will always defer to, then yeah I'm going to say something and I'm going to keep saying it until you listen, but I wouldn't walk up to someone out of nowhere and say their form was bad. That's not my place to say.
I also think unless they're doing something majorly, possibly dangerous, then leave them with it. I'm hyperflexible like the above poster so I have to modify certain things to my body, like push ups, and people look at me like oh she's doing it wrong/easy/whatever but I know from personal experience that locking my joints isn't a good option for me.1 -
richardpkennedy1 wrote: »Random advice giving is bound to solicit a bad reaction regardless of gender. Better to flag it to a trainer
it's not up to a trainer either...unless it's the trainer hired by the person getting the advice.
Yep. Possible exception a trainer is an employee of a gym and part of their duty is to correct people's form. Many trainers are independent contractors and their insurance doesn't cover giving advice to non-clients.0 -
I cannot imagine giving unsolicited advice while someone is working out. What someone else is doing is not my business. I definetly do not want someone trying to correct my form if I have not asked. I think you should work on you and let it be.0
-
Packerjohn wrote: »richardpkennedy1 wrote: »Random advice giving is bound to solicit a bad reaction regardless of gender. Better to flag it to a trainer
it's not up to a trainer either...unless it's the trainer hired by the person getting the advice.
Yep. Possible exception a trainer is an employee of a gym and part of their duty is to correct people's form. Many trainers are independent contractors and their insurance doesn't cover giving advice to non-clients.
even then it's not their job...they don't know the person or why they are doing what they are doing.
In this instance they should say "hey do you mind if I give a bit of advice?" or " may I ask why you do X this way?"
If I actually went to a gym and a trainer decided to correct my form I would probably not be happy...because most who do that are just trying to drum up business...and I find lots aren't that bright anyway.0 -
Most of us are incapable of graciously handling constructive criticism, especially from strangers, so unless serious injury or death is imminent, I don't get involved.4
-
Packerjohn wrote: »richardpkennedy1 wrote: »Random advice giving is bound to solicit a bad reaction regardless of gender. Better to flag it to a trainer
it's not up to a trainer either...unless it's the trainer hired by the person getting the advice.
Yep. Possible exception a trainer is an employee of a gym and part of their duty is to correct people's form. Many trainers are independent contractors and their insurance doesn't cover giving advice to non-clients.
even then it's not their job...they don't know the person or why they are doing what they are doing.
In this instance they should say "hey do you mind if I give a bit of advice?" or " may I ask why you do X this way?"
If I actually went to a gym and a trainer decided to correct my form I would probably not be happy...because most who do that are just trying to drum up business...and I find lots aren't that bright anyway.
At least 5 trainers at my gym have commented that my knees should stay behind my toes while squatting. Next time I'm going to carry prints of research papers and distribute to them.5 -
You don't know these people. You don't know their lifting or injury history. You don't know their goals. You also aren't certified, you learned online. Maybe you are wrong.
Absolutely this!
Also, when I was new(er than now) to the gym I know I would have been horribly embarrassed if someone came up to me to say I was doing something wrong or with poor form. I mean, knew I was doing things wrong and with poor form but the whole thing about starting out is learning. I was on the internet just like you trying to figure things out and it takes time and practice. Depending on the person and their approach, unsolicited advice from a stranger could be way more embarrass than helpful.
Saying that, there have been tons of times I wished someone would give a friendly smile or strike up a conversation with me. People at my gym are pretty stoic! If I got chatting with someone and they slipped some advice among pleasantries, I'd be all over it.1 -
Packerjohn wrote: »richardpkennedy1 wrote: »Random advice giving is bound to solicit a bad reaction regardless of gender. Better to flag it to a trainer
it's not up to a trainer either...unless it's the trainer hired by the person getting the advice.
Yep. Possible exception a trainer is an employee of a gym and part of their duty is to correct people's form. Many trainers are independent contractors and their insurance doesn't cover giving advice to non-clients.
even then it's not their job...they don't know the person or why they are doing what they are doing.
In this instance they should say "hey do you mind if I give a bit of advice?" or " may I ask why you do X this way?"
If I actually went to a gym and a trainer decided to correct my form I would probably not be happy...because most who do that are just trying to drum up business...and I find lots aren't that bright anyway.
At least 5 trainers at my gym have commented that my knees should stay behind my toes while squatting. Next time I'm going to carry prints of research papers and distribute to them.
... as you can see by the "woo" you got it's still a commonly held belief.
However, a little digging shows that there is plenty of real research to back up a claim that knees over toes isn't as bad as people think and that knees behind toes actually puts incredible stress on the back and hips.
https://trustmephysiotherapy.com/myth-knees-never-past-your-toes/2 -
Same here ^, unless someone was obviously doing a maching wrong, but then that's why they have staff there. I usually just put on my headsets and get into my zone!!0
-
Packerjohn wrote: »richardpkennedy1 wrote: »Random advice giving is bound to solicit a bad reaction regardless of gender. Better to flag it to a trainer
it's not up to a trainer either...unless it's the trainer hired by the person getting the advice.
Yep. Possible exception a trainer is an employee of a gym and part of their duty is to correct people's form. Many trainers are independent contractors and their insurance doesn't cover giving advice to non-clients.
even then it's not their job...they don't know the person or why they are doing what they are doing.
In this instance they should say "hey do you mind if I give a bit of advice?" or " may I ask why you do X this way?"
If I actually went to a gym and a trainer decided to correct my form I would probably not be happy...because most who do that are just trying to drum up business...and I find lots aren't that bright anyway.
At least 5 trainers at my gym have commented that my knees should stay behind my toes while squatting. Next time I'm going to carry prints of research papers and distribute to them.
I rest my case on lots of them not being too bright...1 -
liftorgohome wrote: »Same here ^, unless someone was obviously doing a maching wrong, but then that's why they have staff there. I usually just put on my headsets and get into my zone!!
even machines I would leave alone...maybe they like what they are doing and it's not wrong..just different.0 -
glassofroses wrote: »I'm not sure where I come down on this, just because I train in martial arts and we tend to have a high turn of people and that's fine, but currently one of our trainers is in her final month of pregnancy and as one of the most experienced students with a high level of control, she has me pair with new people, guys/girls whoever, so that they can get the benefits of being with someone who knows what they're doing, can spot problems as they come up and can actually work with them, i.e. put two new people on the pads together, it's kind of ridiculous. Basically you're getting a better end of the deal that I am...
Martial arts training is quite a different environment from the weight room though. It's a group activity and, at least in the martial arts I've studied, senior students are expected to take on the role of helping junior students/lower belts. There's an established hierarchy based upon seniority/belt rank and also an inherent (and often codified) element of respect and discipline, both of which are completely unlike the weight room.
If I'm in a group class practicing martial arts, I expect to be guided/taught/corrected by ranking students. If I'm in the weight room lifting by myself (i.e., not in a group setting such as Crossfit or something), I don't need or even want some rando coming over and trying to tell me how to do things. In a martial arts class I can see their belt rank, probably know the person and have probably seen them work out/teach - maybe even sparred with them a few times - so I have an idea of what their level of expertise is. In the gym, I have no idea who this rando is, or what his level of expertise (or lack thereof) is. And there's a whole lot less stupid going on in the average martial arts class than there is in the average gym.
6 -
yep, I would just mind my own business.0
-
I frequent a gym semi-regularly and it took me a long time to work up the confidence to venture into the free weights section and I still prefer to lift at home because I still feel really out of place and like I'm being judged. So if someone was to approach me and say "you are doing this wrong" or some variation of that, no matter how nice the person is I'm gonna assume they were looking at me and laughing behind my back. I'm also probably never going back to the gym out of embarrassment! The only advice I take on my form is from the guy teaching the fitness class I attend, cos he is a professional and I know he has learned about this stuff. You never know, some of these guys may have been shown a different form by a professional.
Anyone approaches me with "I watched a youtube video and you're doing it wrong" I'm not gonna even entertain that.2 -
Iamnotasenior wrote: »When one of the guys at the gym started calling me "moose" under his breath as he walked by me....
That's when you should "accidentally" drop a dumbbell on his foot.0 -
I typically stick to myself, and don't offer advice. however, if they're blatantly being unsafe, I'll wait until they're done with sets and go have a chat with them. Just explain to them what I saw, and if they would mind a bit of info.
I've found that some guys are standoffish and don't like to be told they're doing things wrong. Women tend to think either they're being hit on, or guys are being condescending to them.
Thankfully, I have a decent, semi-private gym where I don't have to workout with the general populace much anymore.2 -
glassofroses wrote: »I'm not sure where I come down on this, just because I train in martial arts and we tend to have a high turn of people and that's fine, but currently one of our trainers is in her final month of pregnancy and as one of the most experienced students with a high level of control, she has me pair with new people, guys/girls whoever, so that they can get the benefits of being with someone who knows what they're doing, can spot problems as they come up and can actually work with them, i.e. put two new people on the pads together, it's kind of ridiculous. Basically you're getting a better end of the deal that I am...
Martial arts training is quite a different environment from the weight room though. It's a group activity and, at least in the martial arts I've studied, senior students are expected to take on the role of helping junior students/lower belts. There's an established hierarchy based upon seniority/belt rank and also an inherent (and often codified) element of respect and discipline, both of which are completely unlike the weight room.
If I'm in a group class practicing martial arts, I expect to be guided/taught/corrected by ranking students. If I'm in the weight room lifting by myself (i.e., not in a group setting such as Crossfit or something), I don't need or even want some rando coming over and trying to tell me how to do things. In a martial arts class I can see their belt rank, probably know the person and have probably seen them work out/teach - maybe even sparred with them a few times - so I have an idea of what their level of expertise is. In the gym, I have no idea who this rando is, or what his level of expertise (or lack thereof) is. And there's a whole lot less stupid going on in the average martial arts class than there is in the average gym.
I definitely agree about it being a different environment, but what I was getting at is that sometimes the attitude of refusing help because they know better is the based on preconceptions rather than a lack of experience/skill by the person offering it. And that maybe shutting a person down before they've even had a chance to speak is cutting your nose off to spite your face a bit.
In my dojo when it comes to day to day training/sparring etcetera we don't wear our belts or even our uniforms, instead we wear what's comfortable. For me, that is my uniform trousers and whatever Nike pro shirt I've grabbed out of the wash. For some of the guys, it's the same or it's shorts and a vest. We also have ladies in standard workout gear. It's a true mish mash because not everyone who attends is interested in progressing further in martial arts or competing but we all mix in together. So to look at me there isn't a visual indicator of my experience other than the fact that I have been specifically asked by my trainer to help. It doesn't take anything but common sense to realise that I've been asked because I'm experienced but some people are so caught up in their preconceptions or their own ego that they don't want to accept the help that's being offered to them. Or willfully try to correct me. I can appreciate that they're offering me advice, like someone in the gym might, but I can also turn around and say with confidence that while I appreciate it, I've been training long enough to know my stuff. So in that respect the(/my) dojo is like a gym. I think that there should always be a free flow exchange of ideas and experience and we shouldn't shut ourselves off from that because of our egos. If someone's trying to help maybe they know something you don't. Maybe they don't and you've just wasted 10 minutes of your life. Still doesn't hurt to hear them out. If you're in the mood for it.
And you'd be surprised how much stupid goes on in martial arts, particularly when it comes to hip rotation/knee placement. I genuinely don't know how some can physically kick the side of a pad but also have their knee turned up towards the ceiling at the same time. I see it over and over and it defies physics I'm sure of it.
0 -
When you see someone doing something horribly wrong at the gym, you're not supposed to correct their form or teach them to use the equipment properly--you're supposed to take a video with your phone and post on YouTube and facebook so we can all have a laugh at someone else's expense.4
Categories
- All Categories
- 1.4M Health, Wellness and Goals
- 391.8K Introduce Yourself
- 43.5K Getting Started
- 259.8K Health and Weight Loss
- 175.6K Food and Nutrition
- 47.3K Recipes
- 232.3K Fitness and Exercise
- 396 Sleep, Mindfulness and Overall Wellness
- 6.4K Goal: Maintaining Weight
- 8.5K Goal: Gaining Weight and Body Building
- 152.8K Motivation and Support
- 7.8K Challenges
- 1.3K Debate Club
- 96.3K Chit-Chat
- 2.5K Fun and Games
- 3.3K MyFitnessPal Information
- 23 News and Announcements
- 967 Feature Suggestions and Ideas
- 2.3K MyFitnessPal Tech Support Questions