What nobody tells you about losing weight
Replies
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CaliVeggieGal wrote: »I don't say a word about other people's food, but I find them defending or explaining the things they eat to me, probably without realizing it. Like, "I'm sorry, but I'm ordering the steak," or "would you mind if I get a dessert?" I still don't have a great response to this to help ease the tension. Any ideas?
I get this a LOT at work. Coworkers are constantly trying to defend their "bad" choices to me (I typically have a tiny lunch so I can have a HUGE dinner, so their normal-sized lunches often look like a large portion comparatively). I usually try to compliment what they're having ("That smells amazing, did you make it yourself?" or "I haven't had meatloaf in so long and that looks great. I'm going to have to make it one of these days"). It tends to deflect attention away from my lunch and lets them know that I'm not judging them for it.10 -
Having lost over 100 pounds there's a TON of stuff that changed that I didn't realize would happen:
1. Being able to walk for miles without feeling winded. I thought I would never get rid of that heavy feeling in my chest.
2. Riding roller coasters - I knew this would happen but I didn't realize how emotional and proud it would make me feel to be able to strap in with no issues or fear that I wouldn't fit.
3. Mirror - Catching a glimpse of myself in a mirror and not recognizing myself right away. This took months to get over.
4. "Fat Girl Syndrome" - I thought I would always be the biggest girl in the room that everyone stared at. I am still overweight but much closer to "normal" than before and I'm almost never the biggest girl in the room anymore.
5. Dress Shopping - I thought I would always hate trying on dresses. Now I love it! I have so many more options as a size 14 than I did as a size 26.
There's a bunch more but these are the ones that immediately come to mind.37 -
CaliVeggieGal wrote: »I don't say a word about other people's food, but I find them defending or explaining the things they eat to me, probably without realizing it. Like, "I'm sorry, but I'm ordering the steak," or "would you mind if I get a dessert?" I still don't have a great response to this to help ease the tension. Any ideas?
@CaliVeggieGal I can’t help with what to say about the steak, but I have a standard desert line: I’m so glad you are getting desert because I wanted a coffee/cappuccino/tea but didn’t want to order it if you would just be sitting there waiting for me to finish ... That seems to counter the other person’s guilt or whatever and makes them order what they want for desert with ease.
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elisa123gal wrote: »This is very true... Eating out made me fat. Now that i eat whole foods and lost the weight, i know the food is fake and filled with chemicals and preservatives that make you fat. i much rather eat my own cooking...and dread having to go out tomorrow night. i'm not tempted...it is just work trying to figure out something decent to eat.There may come a point where eating out is a chore. Most days, I'd so much rather cook at home than go out.
But that's just me. YMMV.
That's not exactly what I meant.
Eating out didn't make me fat. Over eating made me fat. I just pre-log my whole day but often get asked out to dinner at the last minute, so I have to put in more effort to make it fit into my calories. At home, my dinners are heavily veggie based and fairly light, so I front load my day, and by the time dinner rolls around, I don't have a ton of calories to play with. Going out means going for a walk or to the gym to make room. That's the "chore" part.
I prefer to be given notice before going out so that I can figure out what to eat and how to make It fit my calories. A late notice ramen run is definitely not as easy to fit into my calories as zoodles
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elisa123gal wrote: »This is very true... Eating out made me fat. Now that i eat whole foods and lost the weight, i know the food is fake and filled with chemicals and preservatives that make you fat. i much rather eat my own cooking...and dread having to go out tomorrow night. i'm not tempted...it is just work trying to figure out something decent to eat.There may come a point where eating out is a chore. Most days, I'd so much rather cook at home than go out.
But that's just me. YMMV.
That's not exactly what I meant.
Eating out didn't make me fat. Over eating made me fat. I just pre-log my whole day but often get asked out to dinner at the last minute, so I have to put in more effort to make it fit into my calories. At home, my dinners are heavily veggie based and fairly light, so I front load my day, and by the time dinner rolls around, I don't have a ton of calories to play with. Going out means going for a walk or to the gym to make room. That's the "chore" part.
I prefer to be given notice before going out so that I can figure out what to eat and how to make It fit my calories. A late notice ramen run is definitely not as easy to fit into my calories as zoodles
It is more work to eat out, but I really do enjoy it, I just like to plan for it. I have been limiting myself to 2 meals out a week. Last night was an unplanned one and the bartender was laughing at me because I couldn't decide what I wanted(not a ton of healthy options, but they know me and know how I order, lol)....I wanted a burger and fries, but I didn't plan for a burger and fries, so I got a salad and started with envy at the guy's plate that was sitting next to me. Had it been a planned meal out, I would have eaten differently during the day and had the burger.13 -
That I would actually, truly CHERISH the fact that I CAN run. A real run. 10-12 minute mile pace. Slow for some, but I don't think I ever ran this fast when I was a kid. I know I didn't in high school.34
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Sober_Is_Sexy wrote: »What I’ve learned, that I never expected is that I never really REALIZED how big I was until I lost the weight. I mean I knew I was fat, but never really saw HOW FAT until I was able to compare before and after photos...
100%
When I was obese I would look at pictures of myself when I was "thinner" and get so sad. Now 90lbs later I look at my "thinner" pictures and I look huge in them.
I really had no idea how big I was getting. I thought I hid it well but there is no way no one noticed LOL
My boyfriend had the same realization the other day. He didn't see me as that fat but now that I'm A LOT thinner he's amazed.29 -
When I was sooo much heavier, I got my work to buy me an expensive chair so that I had more room and was more solidly built. Now I float in that chair and it feels like a throne. A lovely feeling.
I live in a large metropolitan city and I no longer get that sour look from other passengers on the underground/subway/metro/bus that says, 'I don't want you squashing in next to me.' After all this time, that still surprises me. In fact, before on public transport both of my sides used to touch the arm-rests, now there is plenty of room--and I am one of those people who sit cross-legged. I used to be so envious of that. And what is more, I really do not mind standing now.
On another note, I am so much more confident and bold. I engage with strangers and ask questions so much more easily. I would not have predicted that being a more normal weight would give me a better sense of self-confidence.32 -
What has surprised me is I still see myself as big guy even though people say different and had some friends that haven't seen me not even recognize me. What I love though now is can flex and have something to show and love that my arms are tight in my shirts because of muscle and not fat.19
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I've had this weird thing happen:
My waist has gotten smaller faster than my hips, so when I lay on my side, I kind of collapse a little in the middle. The left side has been especially affected, so I now get muscle spasms/cramps if I lay on the opposite side for too long (scrunching the left side, if you can picture it). The other side is mostly fine *for now* but it's made the sleeping situation much more complicated.
I had a similar strange occurrence. I was having very odd stomach cramps. I went to the doctor to get myself all checked out and I am in excellent health and I have never felt better. However, according to my doctor, it turns out that it is not uncommon for people who lose vast amounts of weight (in my case over 50kg/100lbs) to experience a period where the organs and stomach need to settle back into place. Visceral fat and muscle changes can cause some disruption. I have also been switching to a mostly meat-free so that will have also had a bearing.23 -
I just had a baby in January and I have started logging and walking more to try to drop this baby weight, and it’s working—I’m down 25lbs so far. What I didn’t expect was for everyone to be SO surprised. I’ve had several people comment, “You look really good!” with so much shock in their voice that I’m not sure if I should be offended, like they didn’t think I could look good! And then I don’t really know how to respond, so I just saw thanks and try to change the subject.
I’m also still wearing an abdominal binder from my c-section which makes my stomach look flatter than it really is. So not all these comments are “earned.”23 -
I just had a baby in January and I have started logging and walking more to try to drop this baby weight, and it’s working—I’m down 25lbs so far. What I didn’t expect was for everyone to be SO surprised. I’ve had several people comment, “You look really good!” with so much shock in their voice that I’m not sure if I should be offended, like they didn’t think I could look good! And then I don’t really know how to respond, so I just saw thanks and try to change the subject.
I’m also still wearing an abdominal binder from my c-section which makes my stomach look flatter than it really is. So not all these comments are “earned.”
Oh stop it. You earned these comments because obviously there's a big difference. I wear high-waisted pants but I earned all those damn compliments lol. Congratulations on 25lbs down! Awesome
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Got IDed at liquor store today. The guy was very thorough checking dual IDs and matching name on credit card. Dude I am 33. Too old for this flattery.22
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That your bracelets will become too big, sliding far down onto the back of your hand or slipping off entirely.16
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In the last year I have lost over 60 lbs by eating less tracking it and moving more. My coworker who in the last year has gained about 10 lbs will not stop telling me that I am doing it wrong and the only way to lose weight is xyz supplement of the month (pills,apple cider vinager, other pills, flax,ecr) and that I am doing it wrong. Arrrggggghhh38
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In the last year I have lost over 60 lbs by eating less tracking it and moving more. My coworker who in the last year has gained about 10 lbs will not stop telling me that I am doing it wrong and the only way to lose weight is xyz supplement of the month (pills,apple cider vinager, other pills, flax,ecr) and that I am doing it wrong. Arrrggggghhh
and unfortunately slapping them upside the head is frowned upon in most workplaces!
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That you are an object of baffled wonder at the doctor’s office, since they are used to dealing with overweight/obese patients. From “let me get the child sized blood pressure cuff “ to “let me check your bp again, it can’t be that low” to “we’re maxing out your time for the stress test and your heart rate isn’t high enough” to “wow! I wish we had a student here! We never get such a great view of all 4 chambers outside of pediatrics (at my echocardiogram, the view through the hollow of your throat)”.
Seriously, I’m 36 and a fairly muscular 130. Hardly tiny, definitely not a child, but I suppose it’s all what you’re used to seeing.41 -
There are people out there that never knew you when you were bigger, who are going to have no clue that the size you are now is not where you have always been. "What do you know about weight struggles, you're like a size 4?" Uh, thanks, but I'm a couple of sizes up from there, and I was 230+ lb heavier than this and have struggled with my weight my whole life. I DO know about weight struggles.42
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DamienAngelica wrote: »That your bracelets will become too big, sliding far down onto the back of your hand or slipping off entirely.
I'm going to have to get my wedding ring resized for this reason!9 -
What no one told me about losing weight...
... was that I'd never see myself as thinner. I'd always see myself as fatter. I KNOW I'm not as big as I used to be, but I still feel like I am big. Even though I have maintained the bulk of the weight loss (minus an additional 25 lbs I gained back during my health problems), my perception still hasn't aligned with reality.
... was that flying would be so much less stressful. No longer crammed against the window, hoping that I wasn't too close to the guy next to me.
... was that my tastes would change in surprising ways. I'm a picky eater and I still am a picky eater, but I'm less of a picky eater. I can eat vegetables now and I enjoy them.
... was to be prepared for people sabotaging (Intentionally or unintentionally) my progress. "You're so thin! You need to stop!" "You can't count forever. Just have <insert this treat>!" "That's an impossible goal! You can't possibly have that much to lose!" To be fair, I carry my weight rather well, but I am still not where I *need* to be. I lost a lot of weight, plateaued, maintained for a couple of years while I went through health problems, but I am nowhere near danger of blowing away in the wind. I ignore these voices.
... was about how delighted I would be when co-workers who'd never seen me super heavy disbelieved that I'd once been. I've shown them my "fat face" badge and they find it unbelievable. I giggle like a kid.
... was that losing weight isn't about defining yourself as attractive nor was it about becoming smaller, but that it was about loving yourself. Loving yourself enough to be healthy. Enough to realize that unhealthy habits propagate through all parts of your life. I am happier now -- yes, I need to drop more weight, but it's about so much more than that. Yes, I get depressed when I realized that my year of sickness allowed me to regain some of the 100lbs I lost back, but I can't let it keep me from moving forward. I must love myself and my life and my ability to move unhindered more than the dark sense of failure.
Oh, and what no one prepared me for was that shopping for clothes doesn't actually get easier (I'm a firm believer that clothing companies have a conspiracy to make these things into self-esteem torture devices). "Skinny" people clothing has much of the same problem as bigger people clothing -- if it's not shaped for your body type, you still feel awkward and gross!! I've had to learn that not all things will fit all people, no matter what size I am. But when I find that one perfect outfit that fits like a dream? Oh heck yeah! Happy City Time!42 -
After losing weight, ski bindings need to be adjusted. If the bindings were set more than 25 lbs ago, they are likely too strong to let go of your boot today and you risk injury. You can adjust them yourself or take them in to a ski shop (Sports Basement). You can also take them to any place that rents skis, they should be able to adjust them also. Don't forget to bring in at least one boot. Good Luck!22
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Other people have mentioned these here too, but these three things surprised me the most:
Your feet lose weight and you can drop sizes;
Bones! I can feel the SIDE of my shin bone! And the first time i had a massage after losing a lot of weight it felt like they were trying to press my hips through the massage bench;
That no one will believe how you've lost weight. "I just eat less" is apparently completely unbelievable. "I run 10kms a day and eat nothing but pinecones" is apparently far more believable. It's as if everyone is convinced that weight loss is virtually impossible without starving and exercising yourself to death.37 -
In the last year I have lost over 60 lbs by eating less tracking it and moving more. My coworker who in the last year has gained about 10 lbs will not stop telling me that I am doing it wrong and the only way to lose weight is xyz supplement of the month (pills,apple cider vinager, other pills, flax,ecr) and that I am doing it wrong. Arrrggggghhh
I have gotten that as well an now I just say" You do it your way and I will do it mine" and walk away.10 -
dhiammarath wrote: »What no one told me about losing weight...
... was that I'd never see myself as thinner. I'd always see myself as fatter. I KNOW I'm not as big as I used to be, but I still feel like I am big. Even though I have maintained the bulk of the weight loss (minus an additional 25 lbs I gained back during my health problems), my perception still hasn't aligned with reality.
I agree with everything you said but it is funny I do see myself as big guy still as I am 280 but no longer 400+ and much stronger.
I love having energy not being out of breath going up stairs.
I love lifting almost full rack on the weight machine at the gym.
But the one thing nobody told me of losing weight is that it is a forever struggle I thought after 1.5 years it might be second nature, but it is still difficult to say no to some food and stay on track. People ask me all the time how I did it and then seem very disappointed when the answer is kick *kitten* in the gym and watch the portion sizes.
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Another thing nobody told me is how dangerous it is to get healthy.
Hurt my patella tendon in knee on my second 5K I did.
Tore my rotator cuff boxing.
Never seen the doctor so much when I started exercising. But the good does outweigh the bad.17 -
That I now have to move the car seat forward to be more comfortable.14
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I never knew I would need to replace all my underwear. They certainly don't fit like they used to.29
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Er, I'm perimenopausal and had reached that stage where I had a couple of new, thick, dark hairs growing out of my chin. I just realised that in the last couple of months I've had only one appear, and it's less thick and dark than before. I couldn't say for certain if this development is connected to food-related changes I've made (eating less in general, gradually also making different choices about WHAT I'm eating) or if it's just because of some random hormone fluctuation, but I'm certainly happy about it! Definitely would never have predicted that. I didn't know if I should post this here or in the NSV thread!18
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GOT_Obsessed wrote: »I never knew I would need to replace all my underwear. They certainly don't fit like they used to.
I can't wear dresses because my underwear slides off entirely. Will be stocking up on some new ones soon!18 -
Other people have mentioned these here too, but these three things surprised me the most:
Your feet lose weight and you can drop sizes;
Bones! I can feel the SIDE of my shin bone! And the first time i had a massage after losing a lot of weight it felt like they were trying to press my hips through the massage bench;
That no one will believe how you've lost weight. "I just eat less" is apparently completely unbelievable. "I run 10kms a day and eat nothing but pinecones" is apparently far more believable. It's as if everyone is convinced that weight loss is virtually impossible without starving and exercising yourself to death.
Can't agree more. Recently one of my friend commented " You have lost so much weight! Are you eating anything??!!" I decided to take it as compliment. However I am eating everything, even potato chips! Wishing people would understand it's more about consistency...
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