August 2018 Running Challenge
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Yep, August is definitely back...82F at 3am with a dew point of 70F made for another sweaty run. I took it super easy, and so only got really sweaty instead of intensely sweaty. Score one to me, this time (but if we're keeping score, nature's winning hands down).
01 - 15.66
02 - 14.15
03 - 21.05
05 - 5.75
06 - 15.62
07 - 14.41
Total: 86.64 / 250 miles6 -
amymoreorless wrote: »LaDispute57 wrote: »So here is question... if your spouse or SO would tell you that your running was creating serious issues for them in the relationship and that you really needed to stop running in order to keep the relationship healthy, would you stop running? Or is that the mountain you would die on? I know several runners (including myself) where that became a legitimate issue (obviously not the sole issue, but a major one) and it has been interesting to see the choices they made.
My SO would never do that. That is why I married him (among other reasons).
I have been married 22 years now, and this has never been an issue. I have messed in other ways of course, but this one issue at least has never been a problem
We are still very much happily married and all is good here. And in the last couple years I got her into running too so that has helped
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LaDispute57 wrote: »So here is question... if your spouse or SO would tell you that your running was creating serious issues for them in the relationship and that you really needed to stop running in order to keep the relationship healthy, would you stop running? Or is that the mountain you would die on? I know several runners (including myself) where that became a legitimate issue (obviously not the sole issue, but a major one) and it has been interesting to see the choices they made.
Wow, this is my home situation too (to a slightly lesser extent). I have shared this with this group before, but the lack of support and overall anger she shows toward my running has been a major stress factor in our marriage.
She is getting a little better, but still gives me a lot of grief about it. It one of the main reasons I love this group. You all give me the support and feedback I don't get anywhere else.
I'm not giving up running. Like others have said, it is more due to her insecurities about not exercising and her weight. I try to be supportive and ask her to join me on walks and other activities, and she does occasionally. But still doesn't help with her issues with me. Oh well, I have just become numb to most of her comments and attitude.
Love you guys!
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August Goal: 200 running miles.
August Running:
07.30.18 - 08.05.18: Running Miles - 57 / Weekly TSS - 676 / Fitness: CTL - 84
Goals 08.06.18 - 08.12.18:
Run: 6 Days, at least 55 miles with a LR of 17 on Wknd.
Base 2 : Week 2 of 4
08.06.18 - 5.5 m.
08.07.18 - 9.5 m.
Upcoming Events:
08.25.18 - Tour de Donut Bike Ride
Notes:
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LaDispute57 wrote: »So here is question... if your spouse or SO would tell you that your running was creating serious issues for them in the relationship and that you really needed to stop running in order to keep the relationship healthy, would you stop running? Or is that the mountain you would die on? I know several runners (including myself) where that became a legitimate issue (obviously not the sole issue, but a major one) and it has been interesting to see the choices they made.
My major goal is 50 marathons in 50 states and I have 26 completed. My wife really loves the traveling and mini vacations. We've been to some nice places, and have quite a few destinations yet to get to! Fortunately, I dont think I will ever face that dilemma.11 -
August goal: 70 miles
8/1: impromptu rest day (3 miles were planned)
8/2: 3.15 miles (6 miles were planned, but heat was too awful)
8/3: 7 miles (new distance best!, 3 were planned, but kept going)
8/4: planned rest
8/5: 2 miles (planned rest, back on target for the month)
8/6: elliptical and upper body weights
8/7: 8 miles (5.5 planned, but just rolled with the energy, new distance best!)
20.15 of 70 completed
UPCOMING RACES
August 25th - Camp New Hope 10k
September 7th - 5k Glow Run
COMPLETED RACES
January - Frosty 5k
February - Run for the Chocolate 5k
March - Penguin in the Park 5k
April - Lake Sara Dam 5k
May - Run Through the Jungle 5k
June - French Fried 5k
July - Firecracker 5k5 -
LaDispute57 wrote: »So here is question... if your spouse or SO would tell you that your running was creating serious issues for them in the relationship and that you really needed to stop running in order to keep the relationship healthy, would you stop running? Or is that the mountain you would die on? I know several runners (including myself) where that became a legitimate issue (obviously not the sole issue, but a major one) and it has been interesting to see the choices they made.
I debated a bit about answering this as I still kinda feel like a new kid around here, but here goes. I hope it's not too long winded.
I agree with @PastorVincent that relationships that hope to be successful require compromise however, I think relationships that are struggling or have some underlying issues often have an uneven distribution of compromise. That was my experience with my ex-husband. I went back to college two years ago. It's something I've wanted to do for least the last 15 years. I had talked to him about the idea of going back several times during our marriage and he always met that with animosity and threats of filing for divorce. So I "compromised" and put the idea on the back burner in effort to make my CF of a marriage work. Not quite fair right? Fast forward to 2 years ago, I'm divorced for 6 years and with my S/O Brad for 4 years. Daughter is headed off to college and I think to myself, I'm doing this, even if it costs me my relationship. I was so nervous to talk to him about it because of my history, but there was no reason. Brad was completely on board with it. He said something like when I take care of myself and my desires, I'm also taking care of him and our relationship because he wants me to achieve my goals. It wasn't easy, but Brad never made me feel bad about the time I would have to spend away from him for studying etc.
For now, I have only myself to argue with about school, running, yoga, or lifting. Having experienced both ends of the spectrum, I can't imagine ever being ok with giving up something that helps keep me healthy physically and mentally because my S/O resents it.
For the TL;DRs
It's the mountain I would die on. To me, a S/O or spouse that wants me to stop something they don't like or see value in to keep the relationship healthy isn't healthy at all.10 -
LaDispute57 wrote: »So here is question... if your spouse or SO would tell you that your running was creating serious issues for them in the relationship and that you really needed to stop running in order to keep the relationship healthy, would you stop running? Or is that the mountain you would die on? I know several runners (including myself) where that became a legitimate issue (obviously not the sole issue, but a major one) and it has been interesting to see the choices they made.
New partner. And one that runs next time. Although "next time" here would be another cat. They fuss, but I'm bigger and theyd learn tokeep it to themselves if they want me to pour that food bag.6 -
1---3.03 run
2---8.72 mile mtn bike ride
4---6.22 intervals
5---8.06 hike
7---3.31 intervals
Not so fun run. Hamstring is grumpy after Sundays hike. Hate hard runs, especially since i signed up for a trail half on the same course as last Sunday's rocky hilly trek that kicked my gimpy rear.
Running. 20.6/85miles
Cycling. 8.72
Upcoming Races
October 14th Spirit of Survival Lawton OK. Quarter Marathon
November 3rd Dinosaur Valley Endurance Run. Half. Glen Rose TX
March 31, 2019 A2A Undecided distance. Ardmore OK
April 28, 2019 OKC Memorial Marathon (half)4 -
That's a tough one. My ex-husband wasn't supportive of my running at all and while that wasn't the reason for our divorce it certainly didn't help. When I got married for the second time he knew running was important to me and was always happy to come to a race a cheer. Now he runs with me once a week and we have planned vacations around races. I think it's made our relationship stronger and I feel very fortunate that he is so supportive.6
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LaDispute57 wrote: »So here is question... if your spouse or SO would tell you that your running was creating serious issues for them in the relationship and that you really needed to stop running in order to keep the relationship healthy, would you stop running? Or is that the mountain you would die on? I know several runners (including myself) where that became a legitimate issue (obviously not the sole issue, but a major one) and it has been interesting to see the choices they made.
Hot button topic of the evening. See @PastorVincent 's response for how to deal with a real relationship that can be worked on and made better.
In my world . . . I am divorced. Running wasn't an issue in my marriage, because I didn't become a runner until several years after the divorce was final. However, there is no doubt in my mind that my ex-wife would not have tolerated my taking enough "me time" to become a distance runner. The actual issue that precipitated the divorce had nothing to do with running or any hobby I might have wanted to pursue; but the phenomenon of simply being permitted to do things because I wanted to after she was gone leaves no doubt in my mind that I could never have become a runner while married.
But the thing is, while my hypothetical running would have been a problem with my ex-wife, it would not have been a real issue. It would have been a symptom of the real issues, which were things it turned out I couldn't fix.8 -
08/01/18 - 8 miles @ 9:30
08/02/18 - 0
08/03/18 - 0
08/04/18 - 11 miles @ 10:10
08/05/18 - 0
08/06/18 - 6 miles
Upcoming Races:
08/11/18 - Two Face - 10k Road Race
08/11/18 - Two Face - 10k Trail Race
08/11/18 - Howl At The Moon 5k
--More as I find them - need to find a nice trail race
2021 - Disney World Dopey! (if can raise funds)
Welp summer is back and its just as mad as before. I only had a small window of time so I knocked out a quick 6 and then took a cold shower. HR was way high due to the heat so I guess even though it was pretty short (for me) it still was a good lift.
Slowly getting a new routine worked out where I will be able to run a more reasonable number of miles again. For now, I am walking at least 5k, sometimes as much as 10k, every weekday regardless if I run or not. Just not recording it.5 -
August Running Totals (miles)
8/1 – 2.97 IEXC 5K #1
8/2 – 7.28 MP and easy
8/3 – rest day
8/4 – 16.01 paced run
8/5 – 6.28 easy with fast finish
8/6 – rest day
8/7 – 5.35 warmup, soft tempo run
August running total to date – 37.89
Nominal August mileage goal: 180 miles
Real goals: Avoid injury. Continue to build base and train toward Oak Tree Half and Wineglass Marathon.
Today's notes – Cooler today, but still ridiculously humid. Went to club practice, ran the warmup, and dithered about what to do about speed work. On the spur of the moment, I tagged along behind a group that was targeting a 7:40 mile. The guy doing the targeting messed up his math, and then ran more aggressively than the messed up target, and my Garmin said 6:55 for the first mile just before we completed 4 laps. By then I was drilled into a groove at close to a 7 minute mile per Garmin, so I just kept going round the track, mostly in Lane 2 so the people running faster intervals could pass me on the inside. Ran 4800 meters (or a bit more, for not being in Lane 1) at about that pace, then tried to pick it up for the last 200 meters. Ended up running 12.5 laps of the track in 22:14, and Garmin called it 3.21 miles. I figure I ran as far as I would in a road 5K, a little slower than my normal T pace, but appropriately slower for the level of humidity.
My reward for this is that I don't feel very beat up by this evening's workout. That's good, because IEXC #2 tomorrow evening is the week's real speed workout.
2018 races:
February 17, 2018 Freezeroo #5 (Valentines Run "In Memory of Tom Brannon" 8 Mile) (Greece, NY) finished in 54:48
February 24, 2018 Freezeroo #6 (White House Challenge 4.4 mile) (Webster, NY) finished in 28:46
March 17, 2018 USATF Masters 8K (Shamrock 8K, Virginia Beach, VA) finished in 31:55
March 24, 2018 Spring Forward 15K (Mendon, NY) ran at MP, finished in 1:10:47
April 16, 2018 Boston Marathon (Hopkinton, MA) finished in 3:28:43
April 29, 2018 USATF Masters 10K (James Joyce Ramble, Dedham, MA) finished in 41:33
May 20, 2018 Lilac 10K (Rochester, NY) finished in 42:21
May 26, 2018 Sunset House 5K (Rochester, NY) finished in 20:12
June 3, 2018 USATF Masters Half Marathon (Ann Arbor, MI) finished in 1:34:42
June 9, 2018 Ontario Summit Trail Half Marathon (Naples, NY) DNS - injury
June 17, 2018 Medved 5K to Cure ALS (Rochester, NY) short course, 18:04 for ~2.9 miles
June 30, 2018 Charlie's Old Goat Trail Run 5 mile (Victor, NY) 4.89 miles by Garmin, 43:15
July 14, 2018 Shoreline Half Marathon (Hamlin, NY) finished in 1:45:54
July 28, 2018 Battle at Bristol 10K (Naples, NY) survived in 1:28:33
August 1, 2018 IEXC 5K #1 (Rochester, NY) finished in 22:17
August 8, 2018 IEXC 5K #2 (Rochester, NY)
August 22, 2018 IEXC 5K #3 (Rochester, NY)
August 29, 2018 IEXC 5K #4 (Rochester NY)
August 29, 2018 IEXC TDP 1 mile (Rochester, NY)
August 29, 2018 IEXC TDP 400m (Rochester, NY)
September 2, 2018 Oak Tree Half Marathon (Geneseo, NY)
September 30, 2018 Wineglass Marathon (Bath, NY)
November 11, 2018 Syracuse Half Marathon (Syracuse, NY)
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PastorVincent wrote: »LaDispute57 wrote: »So here is question... if your spouse or SO would tell you that your running was creating serious issues for them in the relationship and that you really needed to stop running in order to keep the relationship healthy, would you stop running? Or is that the mountain you would die on? I know several runners (including myself) where that became a legitimate issue (obviously not the sole issue, but a major one) and it has been interesting to see the choices they made.
There is something underlying that request that is the real issue, not the running itself. It is probably one of time and attention. As a pastor, my first questions would be along those lines. Sometimes partners feel that <insert hobby> is the "other woman/man" because the hobby gets priority over them. Solve the time and attention deficit and the hobby/activity/etc is no longer an issue. In most cases. YMMV and all that.
Finally, ALL relationships must have a degree of compromise and sacrifice by all parties or they will not stand the test of time.
So that is my "expert" (not really) opinion on that.
eidt; typseos
Keep in mind this starts with the assumption that both partners WANT to work out the problem. If one partner does not want to find a solution, then there is really nothing I or any other person can do. Any relationship can be "fixed" if both parties want to badly enough. They only fail with one or both is not willing to put in the work, the very real work, of rebuilding.
Ideally, no marriage ever fails, in real life somewhere around 1/2 do.
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August goal: 25 miles
8/1 3
8/2 2.6
8/3 0
8/4 3.5
8/5 0
8/6 0
8/7 2.5
Month to date: 11.6 / 254 -
LaDispute57 wrote: »So here is question... if your spouse or SO would tell you that your running was creating serious issues for them in the relationship and that you really needed to stop running in order to keep the relationship healthy, would you stop running? Or is that the mountain you would die on? I know several runners (including myself) where that became a legitimate issue (obviously not the sole issue, but a major one) and it has been interesting to see the choices they made.
oh thats a tough one, and would really depend on the reason.
when I started running recently, I was going to try running in the evening. But i could tell my other half wasn't thrilled about it. His reasons were he is home with the kids all day (hes SAHD) and evenings are his time to have a break while I spend time with the kids. I don't get a lot of time in the evenings anyway - I get home betwee 4:30 and 5, and miss 2 is usually in bed by 6 and miss 4 is bed at 7. if I ran for an hour after dinner, he would then be left doing bedtimes as well. and I agree with him. That evening time with my family is important to me. So I switched to running in the morning before everyone gets up. he is happy, I am happy everyone wins. My only caveat is that I do 1 long run of at least an hour on the weekend. So for that situation its about balance and finding a way to fit it all in. Listening to their reasons for it and compromising.
so the question is what is the reason for the issues? if I made that change and DH still had major issues with my running, I would be pissed. I'd tell him to get over it, I was still running, and if it continued to cause issues then the issue is NOT the running but the relationship its self. You need to compromise, and work together to come up with solutions that work, but if someone is unwilling to compromise, then yes that would be a HTDO because as I said, its not the running that's the issue, its the relationship and I'm not willing to be with someone unsupportive and who wont compromise.
ETA or what @PastorVincent said in far fewer words than me!
I love this as an illustration of how compromise works in a relationship. I could absolutely see my husband making a similar request in that situation, or me if our positions were reversed. I could see negotiating time for family, each other, housework, etc. I could see a tough conversation if one of us thought the other were hurting themselves physically or mentally. What I couldn’t see is one of us asking the other to give up something they genuinely loved out of envy or spite or need for control.3 -
8/1 - 5.59 km
8/2 - 5.42 km
8/3 - travel day
8/4 - 11.66 km
8/5 - travel day (14 hours to do a 10.5 hour drive ago)
8/6 - laundry
8/7 - 4.90 km
27.57/125 km
Did my run in my old shoes and aside from early stiffness & tight calves felt pretty good. It is very smoky out so I'm glad my run was on the shorter side. 8 km tomorrow, 5 km Thursday, and at least 16 km Saturday and then I have a 1 week taper.
My shoes and stuff should arrive by UPS tomorrow. I miss them...
2018 Races: (italics means not registered yet, only pondering)
1/1/18 Resolution Run 5K ~38:00 (no official times)
3/4/18 MEC Road Race #1 10K 1:30:57
3/17/28 St Patrick's Day race 10K 1:24:53
4/7/18 Jasper Half Marathon 3:05:55
4/22/18 MEC Trail Race #1 5Kish 1:00:00? (Or 48:45...)
5/20/18 MEC Trail Race #2 10Kish 1:56:15
6/24/18 MEC Trail Race #3 10Kish 2:03:15
7/1/18 Canada Day 15K 2:03:04
7/28/18 Idaho Peak 10K Trail Race 1:30:16
8/18/18 Edmonton Marathon (Half Marathon)
8/25/18 MEC Trail Race #4 10Kish
9/22/18 Heartbeat Run 10K
10/7/18 MEC Trail Race #5 15Kish
12/1/18 Santa Shuffle
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@juliet3455 my bear spray is now in my parents' shed until next summer. I didn't like having it in the car that's for sure! Car wasn't sealed up when I forgot it inside, though, so that's something.LaDispute57 wrote: »So here is question... if your spouse or SO would tell you that your running was creating serious issues for them in the relationship and that you really needed to stop running in order to keep the relationship healthy, would you stop running? Or is that the mountain you would die on? I know several runners (including myself) where that became a legitimate issue (obviously not the sole issue, but a major one) and it has been interesting to see the choices they made.
If this happened it wouldn't be my running that caused the issue, it would be either not making time for my spouse or using running as an excuse to not do my fair share around the house and/or with the kids. We don't have a lot of time either for ourselves or for each other so I try to be mindful of my running and how much time it is taking from my family. It's why I typically run at night after the kids are in bed, and one reason why I haven't started working towards longer distances than a half marathon.
My husband doesn't resent my running and the only request he's made is he's asked if he can leave with the kids in the middle of the race (and sometimes skip the start too and just drop me off) and just be there for the finish.1 -
So I posted yesterday late and between then and now there have been 5! pages of comments! I think we are setting a new record! It is a good thing I am retired so I have time to read them... well sort of.
It is record breaking hot here and with all the fires there is so much smoke in the air. I actually made the decision yesterday that I was going to run my intervals again on the treadmill at the gym. It was even hot and muggy in the gym though and I honestly felt like everything hurt and I was just going to go home. I didn't though and like always after the first couple I felt great. 14x400 w/30s rest plus .25m wu/cd - 2x11:00, 4x10:30, 3x10:00, 1x9:30 (just to see if I could), 2x10:30. 2x11:00 add that to a tough workout with my PT tonight and I am going to sleep well and likely be pretty sore tomorrow. It looks like I may actually make the 100 mile club this month after all if I keep this up even with the heat. So much for a cut back month! I do have agility trials the next 2 weekends so that could impact it though.
Rest day tomorrow.
Date........Miles.......Total
08/01......0.00.......0.00
08/02......3.85.......3.85 - +Strength Training
08/03......5.62.......9.47
08/04......0.00.......9.47
08/05......7.91.....17.38
08/06......5.15.....22.53 - + Agility
08/07......4.52.....27.05 - +Strength Training
08/08......0.00.....27.05
My completed and upcoming races. Let me know if you will be running them too.
02/04/18 - Surf City Half Marathon
05/05/18 - Cinco de Miles 5k
07/22/18 - San Francisco 2nd Half Marathon
12/15/18 - San Diego Holiday Half Marathon
02/03/19 - Surf City Half Marathon
05/11/19 - Santa Barbara Wine Country Half Marathon5 -
Now to respond to some of the posts...
@Avidkeo - I love my Steigen socks! Unfortunately I have not found them in CA anywhere and when I ordered them they came from Canada. I do wear Smartwool (PHD Run ultra lite cushion) pretty much year round. They pull the moisture away from my feet and I never get blisters with them. The only problem I have had is lately they seem to get holes pretty easily. I had never had a pair get a hole unless they were just worn out but have had 3 recently. I can take them back to REI and replace them but sending to Smartwool takes a long time and they don't necessarily send the same style back.
@hayleymace - welcome! Please be careful about trying to run too far too fast to get to a 5k in just over 3 weeks. You may want to consider a walk/run strategy for that race too and train out further for another race. This will help to avoid injuring yourself by trying to do it too fast for your body to adequately adjust.
@KeepRunningFatboy - mmm donuts!
@mbaker566 - Love those pups!
@RunsOnEspresso - with the hurricane moving up the Pacific coast they are saying we may get rain, hot, steamy rain... then it will be on its way over to you!
@USCBMOM22 - Welcome!
@amymoreorless - laughed so hard at the bear meme!
@MegaMooseEsq - I say this to myself all the time!MegaMooseEsq wrote: »Ran a block to catch a bus, didn’t even break a sweat! I never want to let myself forget how much better it feels being in shape.
About loose dogs... so yesterday after almost getting hit by a crazy driver my mind was replaying that over and over so I was a bit startled when Hobbes the Vizsla started jerking on the leash behind me (waist leash so he does have some play in movement but is typically at my side). I was startled to find a large boxer dog running along with us and Hobbes was trying to see her. He is a bit reactive to some boxers but in this case it was clear she wanted to play or run with us. I did find her home - if not she would have followed us all the way to ours and she had apparently gotten out a side gate. I am really glad she was friendly because we have been chased/attacked by very aggressive dogs in that same area who got out thru broken fences/gates.
@LaDispute57 - I can't say my husband was/is thrilled with my running or time it requires but he did see the benefit in the stress reduction it brought me. He also wasn't real supportive of my weight loss at the same time. He liked it and would sort of compliment me but I think it also made him uncomfortable because he wasn't trying to get healthier. We have been married a LONG time so I don't think I would let running be the mountain I would die on but it would be something I would fight for until we worked out a compromise. I honestly can't imagine anything that we couldn't figure out a compromise to. We don't have kids at home any longer and even when we were both working full time he would accommodate (if not support) my running and I would always take into consideration things he wanted to do or we needed to get done. He will take me to races and pick me up afterward, but doesn't wait at the finish. Lately he has made a list of races he wants me to run though so we have an excuse to visit the destinations
@kcs76 - don't ever worry about jumping into a conversation here!5
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