I’m down 90lbs and I’ve never been more miserable
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Replies
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Unfortunately, weight loss has probably thrown your hormones INTO whack.
Fat cells produce hormones that interfere with the menstrual cycle; as you lose weight, your natural hormonal fluctuations become more apparent and your cycle reasserts itself.
When I dipped below about 280 lb, I suddenly went from irregular light bleeding to a fairly regular monthly bloodbath, complete with a week of PMS that mimics viral illness towards the end. It’s been consistent for a year and a half, that’s just what my cycle is like.
It sounds like you may naturally have a cycle from hell. Your psych can’t help with that aspect of things; I would suggest consulting a primary care physician. There are treatments for that sort of thing - if nothing else, some contraceptives stop you menstruating!5 -
bootyrubsandtacos wrote: »My weight loss has completely thrown my hormones out of wack and I’m getting my period every three weeks with SEVERE PMS two weeks before my cycle. It seems to be getting worse the more weight I lose. My insomnia and anxiety have been UNREAL. I take meds and see a psychiatrist, I workout 6 days a week, I practice mindfulness. I go to therapy once a week and NOTHING is helping. I just want to die tbh. I’m also a caregiver to my sick mother, so the added stress of that and my pms I feel like I’m constantly on the verge of a nervous breakdown. I can’t do this anymore. I haven’t worked out in 3 days which is like a record for me.
When was the last time you had your TSH levels checked? Your cycle has obviously changed from a 28 days cycle to 21 days? Your thyroid controls your periods. Granted, you're under a lot of stress, compounded by your weight loss efforts, an appointment with your gynae is due. He/she will likely give you an ultrasound, as well as blood work (TSH, Serum FSH etc) to ascertain what has triggered this change in your cycle, your insomnia, anxiety etc.
Is/was your flow normal? #of days? Volume of flow? [ You needn't answer these prompters ... It's for you really]
Calculating your TDEE and eating at maintenance until your specialist appointment would be advisable. Agree with @Nony_Mouse that 1700 might be re-looked at where it might be too steep a deficit.0 -
I just saw this the other day and it reminds me of your situation. I hope it helps.
https://www.today.com/video/-i-just-want-to-sleep-mother-takes-action-after-battling-insomnia-for-4-years-1310561859622?v=railb&0 -
i'm sorry you're under such duress. i wonder if perhaps your doctor can order a full set of bloodwork to make sure that something else isn't awry? i was taking care of my dying mother when my children were toddlers, and was a complete wreck, so i completely understand what that is all about regarding caregiving. it sounds like you need a break in a few ways. my best wishes to you... and please keep us posted. we're rooting for you!
I agree. I had low iron once which made everything feel terrible0 -
I think that your mental health needs to take priority over your weight goals for now. Now is a good time to take a diet break and focus on your other health needs. You can always go back into a deficit in the future when you feel better.
Some of the things you said in your original post made me concerned. If you ever feel like you are in immediate emotional distress, then please, give the Lifeline a call or chat with them: https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/. They can offer more immediate and professional help than we can give.
Thanks for your concern I really appreciate it. It’s funny dieting and working out is the LEAST of my stresses. It was the ONE thing going right in my life, but with these external issues and my body hating me I’m really just losing my drive. I don’t even know what I’m fighting for anymore.That sounds really hard, I'm sorry you are dealing with all of that. And insomnia and anxiety just make you feel awful. If there is anything to focus on, starting with good sleep is usually a good place to start. Easier said than done, I know. When times are extra stressful, I feel like sometimes we just have to do the best we can to get through and whatever is going to help you the most.
I wouldn't worry so much about your workouts as a means to stay on track. Only if something is helping you cope - is there any particular activity that brings you any relief? Yoga, walking, or something SO high intensity you literally can't focus or hold on to any stressful thoughts in your head, or that burns some of that adrenaline/anxiety? If anything gives you a mental boost, I'd say go for that one and forget the rest. Or IF you find that you feel better after you go, then yes, push yourself to go to get that reward or any endorphins. But don't worry about it for calorie burn.
I'm so sorry this is so hard - it's okay to take a step back from the world if you need to and just focus on self-care and taking as much off your plate as you possibly can. Just survival sometimes is simply all we can do. Be kind to yourself - depression and anxiety are not easy even without other stresses on top of it. Think of sleep, nutrition, exercise as positive self-care if it helps, but don't feel guilt for taking sleep and rest and just hibernating a bit if that's what helps you through a dark time too. Just do what will help you the most, without apologies or feeling like what you "should" be doing. Hugs.
Thanks for your kind words . I haven’t done HIIT in awhile, because it became to overwhelming. I was getting exercise induced panic attacks. My insomnia stems from taking care of my mom alone. I feel like I have to be on “Alert” 24/7 in case she needs help. She’s not in the best health and I am an excessive worrier. I can’t remember the last time I had a peaceful night sleep.Sleep is down in the most basic layer of Maslow ‘s hierarchy of needs, along with oxygen and food. How long have you been struggling with insomnia? Are either of your doctors addressing the sleep issue? Getting enough sleep will help everything, including hormones.
Long story- Several years ago I had major depression for a bit over a year and tried several antidepressants , but I just couldn’t tolerate the side effects. Never found one that worked for me. However, sleeping pills saved me. My depression spiraled with sleeplessness, so getting one under control vastly helped the other. Once I felt better, I had no trouble stopping the sleeping pills. Just decided one day I was doing ok and stopped them. Much simpler than weaning off antidepressants. My rule for myself is sleep comes first. I have no business doing workouts if I’m not getting adequate sleep.
I have no idea on the menstrual cycle. My cycle went from a pretty consistent 28 days to 21-24 days as I neared 50. My understanding is that’s not uncommon in peri menopause (heightened FSH), but I’m 53 and you look too young for that to be a factor. Someone else mentioned oral contraceptives can be a huge help regulating hormones in some cases, and I do agree with that. Ask your GYN for help. My heart goes out to you. It sounds like a very stressful time and you need some relief.
Since I was in my early twenties. My insomnia is nothing new. It’s just getting WORSE. I’ve been on all different types of sleep meds throughout the years. I’m currently on restoril and it’s a real hit or miss. There’s one sleeping pill I wish I could try, but my insurance doesn’t cover it and it’s too expensive to pay out of pocket. My insurance doesn’t cover many sleeping pills.777Gemma888 wrote: »bootyrubsandtacos wrote: ».777Gemma888 wrote: »Since cooler temps are approaching ... Would you consider walking your mother through that lovely park you'd written about? Does it have a walking path? Agree@ease off the workouts. Instead incalcate an activity with your mum. That way, you could ease your mind and get some walking miles in. If you need complete moments to yourself, how about playing an audio book for her to occupy her, whilst you listen to what peps you up. Make it enjoyable for you both.
If your program seems rote, you need to claim moments which could qualify as exercise, only that you plan it, so that it doesn't feel like it. You could walk to the museum or an art gallery too. Aren't you in NY? There's so much to do there.
My mom goes to water therapy three times a week. We also do YT sit down workouts. I actually really enjoy working out. I like to go for my walks alone tbh. I need that time to myself. It’s the insomnia that’s really killing my energy. I take sleeping pills and they don’t always work especially when I’m pms’ing.
Have you considered eating at your maintenance then? Just until you get a better handle on things. I cannot really suggest anything to aid you with sleep ... Since it's relatively new ... Sleep clinic would be an extreme approach. Hope you and your specialists figure out exactly what has caused this shift from your menses to your disrupted sleep.
I actually had a sleep study a few months ago. I was diagnosed with mild sleep apnea.
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gebeziseva wrote: »I have severe PMS and period pains lately (including a trip to the A&E where I was given opioid injections for the pain) and my gynecologyst prescribed the following treatment:
1x500mg Naproxen every 12 hours (prescription NSAID in the UK)
2x10mg hyoscine 4 times a day (over the counter in the UK)
2x500mg paracetamol 4 times a day (over the counter in the UK)
I'm supposed to start taking those a couple of days before I expect my pain to start and keep taking them for the duration.
This has helped me immencely. I still have some pain but totally manageable.
My advice is to run by your GP or gyne this treatment and see if they think it is appropriate for you.
Omg that must be hell. I’m glad you got some relief. Fortunately my periods aren’t physically painful they just make me crazy and extremely depressed.Millicent3015 wrote: »If there's any way you can get some respite care for your mum, even if it's just for a few days, please explore that. There may be some mental health support groups in your area where you can meet with other people who understand your struggles. I don't know what meds you're on, but if you think they're not being as effective as they could be you can discuss with your psychiatrist about adjusting your dose or trying a different one, maybe one you take at night that can make you drowsy enough to fall asleep. You really need to get the TOM issue looked at, too. Take a break. You're doing so much and if you're not getting enough to eat and/or working out too much, that will impact you. It's okay to ease back for a while, you can always resume your eating and exercise once you've got the other things sorted out.
They actually offer support groups where my mom goes for water therapy. I’ve had the flier in my bag for weeks. I’m kind of nervous to go.happytree923 wrote: »Definitely see a PCP or GYN for the period/PMS issues if you have only gotten help from a psychiatrist so far. Psychiatric meds can work very well but they don’t balance period hormones! I reduced my antidepressant dose by getting on the right birth control, it helped that much. I hope you find the right combination of medical and non-medical support you need to get through!
Yeah I know. I’m terrified of the pill, but I’m hoping a IUD might help.
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Unfortunately, weight loss has probably thrown your hormones INTO whack.
Fat cells produce hormones that interfere with the menstrual cycle; as you lose weight, your natural hormonal fluctuations become more apparent and your cycle reasserts itself.
When I dipped below about 280 lb, I suddenly went from irregular light bleeding to a fairly regular monthly bloodbath, complete with a week of PMS that mimics viral illness towards the end. It’s been consistent for a year and a half, that’s just what my cycle is like.
It sounds like you may naturally have a cycle from hell. Your psych can’t help with that aspect of things; I would suggest consulting a primary care physician. There are treatments for that sort of thing - if nothing else, some contraceptives stop you menstruating!
I read that! Jesus. So this sh$& is just going to keep getting worse. Yeah I definitely do.SeptemberFeyre wrote: »I just saw this the other day and it reminds me of your situation. I hope it helps.
https://www.today.com/video/-i-just-want-to-sleep-mother-takes-action-after-battling-insomnia-for-4-years-1310561859622?v=railb&
Thanks. I will read it in a few.777Gemma888 wrote: »bootyrubsandtacos wrote: »My weight loss has completely thrown my hormones out of wack and I’m getting my period every three weeks with SEVERE PMS two weeks before my cycle. It seems to be getting worse the more weight I lose. My insomnia and anxiety have been UNREAL. I take meds and see a psychiatrist, I workout 6 days a week, I practice mindfulness. I go to therapy once a week and NOTHING is helping. I just want to die tbh. I’m also a caregiver to my sick mother, so the added stress of that and my pms I feel like I’m constantly on the verge of a nervous breakdown. I can’t do this anymore. I haven’t worked out in 3 days which is like a record for me.
When was the last time you had your TSH levels checked? Your cycle has obviously changed from a 28 days cycle to 21 days? Your thyroid controls your periods. Granted, you're under a lot of stress, compounded by your weight loss efforts, an appointment with your gynae is due. He/she will likely give you an ultrasound, as well as blood work (TSH, Serum FSH etc) to ascertain what has triggered this change in your cycle, your insomnia, anxiety etc.
Is/was your flow normal? #of days? Volume of flow? [ You needn't answer these prompters ... It's for you really]
Calculating your TDEE and eating at maintenance until your specialist appointment would be advisable. Agree with @Nony_Mouse that 1700 might be re-looked at where it might be too steep a deficit.
It been awhile. The last time I got it checked my PCP said I was borderline under active and that he wanted to “watch it” before he decides to treat me. That was months ago. I haven’t gone back to see him because he’s very nasty and he didn’t want to help me get off the sleep meds that caused me to gain weight. I have to find another PCP. I’ve just been stalling, because very few dr’s take my insurance around here and the ones I have seen were AWFUL.
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Stay the course. Be strong.0
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If I'm doing the math right, you are still over 300 (400-90 lost), and you said you are netting 1700. That's low for your current weight.2
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Maybe take a weight loss break. Find balance. I am trying to find it myself I understand the hormone issue. Even as a man, my testosterone tanked as I lost a lot of weight and got , well, too thin! Never thought I would say that. Best of luck.3
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Nothing to add but wanted to say I hope you feel better soon1
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I just wanted to say hang in there and what you did by losing 90lbs is an incredible achievement and I hope you will feel better soon.2
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Can you get a Mirena IUD to get your periods/PMS under control? That thing saved my sanity. I got my first one after delivering my youngest, 15 years ago. Still have one.
Sending you warm thoughts. I'm sorry I can't offer more advice or help 1 -
I sent you a pm.0
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girlwithcurls2 wrote: »Can you get a Mirena IUD to get your periods/PMS under control? That thing saved my sanity. I got my first one after delivering my youngest, 15 years ago. Still have one.
Sending you warm thoughts. I'm sorry I can't offer more advice or help
Thank you. I’m actually going to bring it up when I find an OB. I had one a few years back and I remember feeling balanced on it. I was in A LOT of pain the first few months though.ErnestineBorgnine wrote: »I sent you a pm.
I didn’t get it @ErnestineBorgnine
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bootyrubsandtacos wrote: »Unfortunately, weight loss has probably thrown your hormones INTO whack.
Fat cells produce hormones that interfere with the menstrual cycle; as you lose weight, your natural hormonal fluctuations become more apparent and your cycle reasserts itself.
When I dipped below about 280 lb, I suddenly went from irregular light bleeding to a fairly regular monthly bloodbath, complete with a week of PMS that mimics viral illness towards the end. It’s been consistent for a year and a half, that’s just what my cycle is like.
It sounds like you may naturally have a cycle from hell. Your psych can’t help with that aspect of things; I would suggest consulting a primary care physician. There are treatments for that sort of thing - if nothing else, some contraceptives stop you menstruating!
I read that! Jesus. So this sh$& is just going to keep getting worse. Yeah I definitely do.SeptemberFeyre wrote: »I just saw this the other day and it reminds me of your situation. I hope it helps.
https://www.today.com/video/-i-just-want-to-sleep-mother-takes-action-after-battling-insomnia-for-4-years-1310561859622?v=railb&
Thanks. I will read it in a few.777Gemma888 wrote: »bootyrubsandtacos wrote: »My weight loss has completely thrown my hormones out of wack and I’m getting my period every three weeks with SEVERE PMS two weeks before my cycle. It seems to be getting worse the more weight I lose. My insomnia and anxiety have been UNREAL. I take meds and see a psychiatrist, I workout 6 days a week, I practice mindfulness. I go to therapy once a week and NOTHING is helping. I just want to die tbh. I’m also a caregiver to my sick mother, so the added stress of that and my pms I feel like I’m constantly on the verge of a nervous breakdown. I can’t do this anymore. I haven’t worked out in 3 days which is like a record for me.
When was the last time you had your TSH levels checked? Your cycle has obviously changed from a 28 days cycle to 21 days? Your thyroid controls your periods. Granted, you're under a lot of stress, compounded by your weight loss efforts, an appointment with your gynae is due. He/she will likely give you an ultrasound, as well as blood work (TSH, Serum FSH etc) to ascertain what has triggered this change in your cycle, your insomnia, anxiety etc.
Is/was your flow normal? #of days? Volume of flow? [ You needn't answer these prompters ... It's for you really]
Calculating your TDEE and eating at maintenance until your specialist appointment would be advisable. Agree with @Nony_Mouse that 1700 might be re-looked at where it might be too steep a deficit.
It been awhile. The last time I got it checked my PCP said I was borderline under active and that he wanted to “watch it” before he decides to treat me. That was months ago. I haven’t gone back to see him because he’s very nasty and he didn’t want to help me get off the sleep meds that caused me to gain weight. I have to find another PCP. I’ve just been stalling, because very few dr’s take my insurance around here and the ones I have seen were AWFUL.
That is awful indeed. Borderline. Interesting to hear what another specialist will say. Please do keep us posted. Praying for a better outcome for you.1 -
Lack of sleep has brutal side effects. My reco would be to do whatever it takes to tackle that first.3
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bootyrubsandtacos wrote: »gebeziseva wrote: »I have severe PMS and period pains lately (including a trip to the A&E where I was given opioid injections for the pain) and my gynecologyst prescribed the following treatment:
1x500mg Naproxen every 12 hours (prescription NSAID in the UK)
2x10mg hyoscine 4 times a day (over the counter in the UK)
2x500mg paracetamol 4 times a day (over the counter in the UK)
I'm supposed to start taking those a couple of days before I expect my pain to start and keep taking them for the duration.
This has helped me immencely. I still have some pain but totally manageable.
My advice is to run by your GP or gyne this treatment and see if they think it is appropriate for you.
Omg that must be hell. I’m glad you got some relief. Fortunately my periods aren’t physically painful they just make me crazy and extremely depressed.Millicent3015 wrote: »If there's any way you can get some respite care for your mum, even if it's just for a few days, please explore that. There may be some mental health support groups in your area where you can meet with other people who understand your struggles. I don't know what meds you're on, but if you think they're not being as effective as they could be you can discuss with your psychiatrist about adjusting your dose or trying a different one, maybe one you take at night that can make you drowsy enough to fall asleep. You really need to get the TOM issue looked at, too. Take a break. You're doing so much and if you're not getting enough to eat and/or working out too much, that will impact you. It's okay to ease back for a while, you can always resume your eating and exercise once you've got the other things sorted out.
They actually offer support groups where my mom goes for water therapy. I’ve had the flier in my bag for weeks. I’m kind of nervous to go.happytree923 wrote: »Definitely see a PCP or GYN for the period/PMS issues if you have only gotten help from a psychiatrist so far. Psychiatric meds can work very well but they don’t balance period hormones! I reduced my antidepressant dose by getting on the right birth control, it helped that much. I hope you find the right combination of medical and non-medical support you need to get through!
Yeah I know. I’m terrified of the pill, but I’m hoping a IUD might help.
I hated the pill. I felt nauseous all the time. It was easier to abstain.0 -
bootyrubsandtacos wrote: »I think that your mental health needs to take priority over your weight goals for now. Now is a good time to take a diet break and focus on your other health needs. You can always go back into a deficit in the future when you feel better.
Some of the things you said in your original post made me concerned. If you ever feel like you are in immediate emotional distress, then please, give the Lifeline a call or chat with them: https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/. They can offer more immediate and professional help than we can give.
Thanks for your concern I really appreciate it. It’s funny dieting and working out is the LEAST of my stresses. It was the ONE thing going right in my life, but with these external issues and my body hating me I’m really just losing my drive. I don’t even know what I’m fighting for anymore.That sounds really hard, I'm sorry you are dealing with all of that. And insomnia and anxiety just make you feel awful. If there is anything to focus on, starting with good sleep is usually a good place to start. Easier said than done, I know. When times are extra stressful, I feel like sometimes we just have to do the best we can to get through and whatever is going to help you the most.
I wouldn't worry so much about your workouts as a means to stay on track. Only if something is helping you cope - is there any particular activity that brings you any relief? Yoga, walking, or something SO high intensity you literally can't focus or hold on to any stressful thoughts in your head, or that burns some of that adrenaline/anxiety? If anything gives you a mental boost, I'd say go for that one and forget the rest. Or IF you find that you feel better after you go, then yes, push yourself to go to get that reward or any endorphins. But don't worry about it for calorie burn.
I'm so sorry this is so hard - it's okay to take a step back from the world if you need to and just focus on self-care and taking as much off your plate as you possibly can. Just survival sometimes is simply all we can do. Be kind to yourself - depression and anxiety are not easy even without other stresses on top of it. Think of sleep, nutrition, exercise as positive self-care if it helps, but don't feel guilt for taking sleep and rest and just hibernating a bit if that's what helps you through a dark time too. Just do what will help you the most, without apologies or feeling like what you "should" be doing. Hugs.
Thanks for your kind words . I haven’t done HIIT in awhile, because it became to overwhelming. I was getting exercise induced panic attacks. My insomnia stems from taking care of my mom alone. I feel like I have to be on “Alert” 24/7 in case she needs help. She’s not in the best health and I am an excessive worrier. I can’t remember the last time I had a peaceful night sleep.Sleep is down in the most basic layer of Maslow ‘s hierarchy of needs, along with oxygen and food. How long have you been struggling with insomnia? Are either of your doctors addressing the sleep issue? Getting enough sleep will help everything, including hormones.
Long story- Several years ago I had major depression for a bit over a year and tried several antidepressants , but I just couldn’t tolerate the side effects. Never found one that worked for me. However, sleeping pills saved me. My depression spiraled with sleeplessness, so getting one under control vastly helped the other. Once I felt better, I had no trouble stopping the sleeping pills. Just decided one day I was doing ok and stopped them. Much simpler than weaning off antidepressants. My rule for myself is sleep comes first. I have no business doing workouts if I’m not getting adequate sleep.
I have no idea on the menstrual cycle. My cycle went from a pretty consistent 28 days to 21-24 days as I neared 50. My understanding is that’s not uncommon in peri menopause (heightened FSH), but I’m 53 and you look too young for that to be a factor. Someone else mentioned oral contraceptives can be a huge help regulating hormones in some cases, and I do agree with that. Ask your GYN for help. My heart goes out to you. It sounds like a very stressful time and you need some relief.
Since I was in my early twenties. My insomnia is nothing new. It’s just getting WORSE. I’ve been on all different types of sleep meds throughout the years. I’m currently on restoril and it’s a real hit or miss. There’s one sleeping pill I wish I could try, but my insurance doesn’t cover it and it’s too expensive to pay out of pocket. My insurance doesn’t cover many sleeping pills.777Gemma888 wrote: »bootyrubsandtacos wrote: ».777Gemma888 wrote: »Since cooler temps are approaching ... Would you consider walking your mother through that lovely park you'd written about? Does it have a walking path? Agree@ease off the workouts. Instead incalcate an activity with your mum. That way, you could ease your mind and get some walking miles in. If you need complete moments to yourself, how about playing an audio book for her to occupy her, whilst you listen to what peps you up. Make it enjoyable for you both.
If your program seems rote, you need to claim moments which could qualify as exercise, only that you plan it, so that it doesn't feel like it. You could walk to the museum or an art gallery too. Aren't you in NY? There's so much to do there.
My mom goes to water therapy three times a week. We also do YT sit down workouts. I actually really enjoy working out. I like to go for my walks alone tbh. I need that time to myself. It’s the insomnia that’s really killing my energy. I take sleeping pills and they don’t always work especially when I’m pms’ing.
Have you considered eating at your maintenance then? Just until you get a better handle on things. I cannot really suggest anything to aid you with sleep ... Since it's relatively new ... Sleep clinic would be an extreme approach. Hope you and your specialists figure out exactly what has caused this shift from your menses to your disrupted sleep.
I actually had a sleep study a few months ago. I was diagnosed with mild sleep apnea.
Only, that in order for sleep apnea to be the root cause here, you would need to be able to fall asleep in the first place. Stymied.0
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