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My worst nightmare

torabelle79torabelle79 Member Posts: 63 Member Member Posts: 63 Member
I have arranged a swim party for my son's 8th birthday party. My ex husband will be there will his stunning girlfriend. 10 years younger than me, and never had children.
I have to be in a swim suit in front of both of then as I have to assist in the pool.
This man once told me I was fat. I'm dreading it!! I've lost 36lb and look okay, but I do not have the courage to do this!!te2lnfi7mnks.jpeg
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Replies

  • torabelle79torabelle79 Member Posts: 63 Member Member Posts: 63 Member
    This is me today. Getting there but have belly that clearly isn't toned.....
    My body image is always dreadful. I cant bear to be seen by him in a swim suit.....
  • FuzzipegFuzzipeg Member Posts: 2,079 Member Member Posts: 2,079 Member
    Try not to let this man pass a cloud over what should be a happy event for your son. I know its much easier said than done, I've had more than the crises. In the time you and your son have been away from the toxic situation you have both come such a long way. You can only have grown in your knowledge, understanding and experience. He needs the flattery of someone much younger to sooth his ego, I suspect you have no need of someone in your life as a decoration. That person would have to add so much more to your lives than you would loose by simply in having "someone" there especially one who knows how to be so deeply hurtful.

    If you really need to be in the pool, how about one of those wetsuits. I've no idea if you an hire one, or if there are inexpensive ones to buy, it would let you still feel dressed for the occasion. I know they are old fashioned, could something like a cat-suit be dual purpose? Who's the character I'm thinking of, *kitten* Galore, was it?

    Most of all, be proud of the life you are achieving for yourself and your son. (Bet he said you could not manage on your own too.) Go for it, with deep pride.
  • 777Gemma888777Gemma888 Member Posts: 9,563 Member Member Posts: 9,563 Member
    Agree with the other posters. You look great. Maybe a one piece swimsuit with tummy control?!?(only if you're uncomfortable about that area). It would just accentuate the area more, diverting the eyes, usually with some kind of bust area emphasis and elevation. Hair, mani-pedi and light waterproof makeup ... BooM!!

  • fraukazifraukazi Member Posts: 614 Member Member Posts: 614 Member
    You look amazing, be proud of what you have achieved.
    And definitely read the thread suggested by @Lounmoun
  • mbaker566mbaker566 Member Posts: 11,234 Member Member Posts: 11,234 Member
    don't worry. enjoy the time with your son. your ex is your ex and all that is needed at this point is to keep a good working relationship for your son.

    there are so many cute suits. enjoy. it can be trying to go suit shopping. don't get stuck in your head :smile:
  • TwinkiestaaarTwinkiestaaar Member Posts: 4 Member Member Posts: 4 Member
    Therapy. ‘Cause you’re a hot mama and it isn’t anything remotely having to deal with what your body actually looks like that is making you feel this way. I totally relate- and I can see it in you put not in me.
  • Evelyn_GorframEvelyn_Gorfram Member Posts: 706 Member Member Posts: 706 Member
    I have arranged a swim party for my son's 8th birthday party. My ex husband will be there will his stunning girlfriend. 10 years younger than me, and never had children.
    I have to be in a swim suit in front of both of then as I have to assist in the pool.
    This man once told me I was fat. I'm dreading it!! I've lost 36lb and look okay, but I do not have the courage to do this!!te2lnfi7mnks.jpeg
    (PS. I hope you don't mind my mentioning how much your belly button reminds me of a Kokopelli dancer. :) )

    edited September 2018
  • elisa123galelisa123gal Member Posts: 4,033 Member Member Posts: 4,033 Member
    sounds like you're not totally over the divorce. and you can't make that happen until time does the trick.

    In the meantime you need a game plan. So, you've lost weight..and you look good. The old Ex will notice that!

    So, get some money.. buy a great swimsuit and sexy cover up.... make it colorful and outstanding..bring a good friend with a sense of style with you. Get you hair done.. get hi lights and great style and maybe even a new color.. I think I see red hair..so have your stylist rev it up. Get a manicure and pedicure.

    Then.. plaster a smile on your face and be as nice as you can be to his young girlfriend ... be the hostess in charge. and .the hostess with the mostest. Have great food.. beautiful cake.. and surround yourself with adoring friends. Don't let them see you sweat!

    And I also suggest you watch "It's complicated"
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