The Sober Squad- Alcohol Free Living

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  • NormInv
    NormInv Posts: 3,303 Member
    joha5603 wrote: »
    30 days AF on the books. This is, historically, a tough place for me (in my lengthy 4 months of attempts - ha!). I celebrated with a big crazy hike, in which I denied the peak and napped for a half hour instead. Pure bliss. Still, 2,500 elev gain in 3.5 miles (7 round trip)....yowza!


    Love this hard
  • mbaker566
    mbaker566 Posts: 11,233 Member
    edited October 2018
    73CL350 wrote: »
    I had a death in the family saturday ... drove 12 hours to the funeral, which was today.

    I was the only sober person at the funeral.

    I Guess alcoholism really does run in the family.

    that is hard. i had a friend die-od/alcohol. they(his family) held the wake in a bar.
  • mbaker566
    mbaker566 Posts: 11,233 Member
    whitpauly wrote: »
    When my brother passed May 2018 I kept it together surprisingly for a month and a half,luckily I was able to pull outta the pit in time for the memorial but two of my brothers kept leaving the service to go out to their truck to top off with Bud light,,I was pissed off at them but I know I'd have been doing the same if my binge had continued,,def runs in our families but thats no excuse,we just gotta work a little harder I guess,my kids seem to be able to drink "normally" thank goodness but I do tell them that my drinking started off slowly too,2 beers and id be out then slowly it built to 5,10,15 etc :# I don't really like to post amounts cuz then some people read "well I'm not THAT bad" but if you're drinking to get drunk you are that bad regardless of amount,my thoughts for the day haha Ruby great job on getting thru your stressful day and I hope whoever woo'ed it meant woo hoo! Have a fabulous AF day guys <3

    that's a really good point. look for the similarities not the differences. don't set yourself apart.
  • salleewins
    salleewins Posts: 2,308 Member
    NormInv wrote: »
    Day 3 guys - my goal is to lower my numbers....my LDL, my resting HR, my BP, my waistline......I said to myself, I need to see results, enough talk, more action

    You can do it! My tri. # is now in normal range. Chol. went down 30 points in 6 mo. Probably some due to not eating junk while drinking, exercising regularly and healthier diet overall, but def due to no alcohol.
  • salleewins
    salleewins Posts: 2,308 Member
    whitpauly wrote: »
    When my brother passed May 2018 I kept it together surprisingly for a month and a half,luckily I was able to pull outta the pit in time for the memorial but two of my brothers kept leaving the service to go out to their truck to top off with Bud light,,I was pissed off at them but I know I'd have been doing the same if my binge had continued,,def runs in our families but thats no excuse,we just gotta work a little harder I guess,my kids seem to be able to drink "normally" thank goodness but I do tell them that my drinking started off slowly too,2 beers and id be out then slowly it built to 5,10,15 etc :# I don't really like to post amounts cuz then some people read "well I'm not THAT bad" but if you're drinking to get drunk you are that bad regardless of amount,my thoughts for the day haha Ruby great job on getting thru your stressful day and I hope whoever woo'ed it meant woo hoo! Have a fabulous AF day guys <3

    I am so sorry about your brother. My heart goes out to you.
  • salleewins
    salleewins Posts: 2,308 Member
    Ruby nice going!!
  • salleewins
    salleewins Posts: 2,308 Member
    Wow, I am so happy to find this board. You guys are making me feel like there are other people out there experiencing the same thoughts/actions that I do on a regular basis. Today is Day 1 for me. I've gained 30 lbs since getting remarried and moving to a new state. It's time to start dealing with the emotions without alcohol. I am lucky to get 6 hours of sleep a night, and once that first beer goes down it's a free for all with the food. I am ready to put alcohol behind me once and for all. I am with many of you...if it's in the house, I will drink it.

    Sleep will improve. Welcome! Keep going! It is more than worth it! You gain many things including self respect. I was pretty low with alcohol ruling me.
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,359 Member
    joha5603 wrote: »
    Who's going for a sober Halloween? Besides me? :)

    Last year was fun (it was dubbed Hallowhiskey by my clever crew), but this year I might even get to keep some memories! Last year my daughter and I dressed up as the same thing - Viking shield maidens a la Lagertha - and we had an epic sword battle which she won... apparently. I can't recall much of it. I'm stoked for another chance to make memories this year. Raise your hand if you're pledging a sober celebration!

    This will be a sober Halloween. @joha5603 Last few years, my house was the house the adults gathered; I made a big pot of chili and the Dads stroll through the neighborhood with their beer mugs, getting a top off. I used to love Halloween (this will sound really selfish) because it was the RARE time I wasnt with my kids, because husband took them trick or treating. So, I would have my very own “old fashioned” happy hour. I always equated alcohol as a just reward.

    This year, I haven’t invited any of the usual friends over. If I do, it will be at the last minute. But I think this Halloween will be quiet. My kids are older anyway.
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,359 Member
    @whitpauly My deepest sympathies to you. It’s heartbreaking. Xo
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,359 Member
    Wow, I am so happy to find this board. You guys are making me feel like there are other people out there experiencing the same thoughts/actions that I do on a regular basis. Today is Day 1 for me. I've gained 30 lbs since getting remarried and moving to a new state. It's time to start dealing with the emotions without alcohol. I am lucky to get 6 hours of sleep a night, and once that first beer goes down it's a free for all with the food. I am ready to put alcohol behind me once and for all. I am with many of you...if it's in the house, I will drink it.

    Good luck! We are here with you and for you. Arm yourself with a plan for when you may get a craving. What will you turn to? Maybe Tea, exercise, art, etc. Something to fill that void in case you’re bored.

    I think many of us have drowned our pain/emotions with alcohol. Here’s to Day 2 tomorrow! You have what it takes! Xo
  • islandbeez
    islandbeez Posts: 162 Member
    It will be a quiet Halloween here as well. Our kids are grown, the grandboy will be turning 1 the next day, so he won't go to many houses ;-) When the kids were little, we always took a thermos of warm cider and Jim Beam. Lots of buzzed Halloweens for us, now it'll be iced tea for him and hot tea for me and I am not even mad about it.
  • islandbeez
    islandbeez Posts: 162 Member
    Hi @NormInv ! Always nice to see you :)
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,359 Member
    Bobby959 wrote: »
    Hi I'm on day 5 of being AF. I have been heavily drinking for 10 to 15 years but I have been a secret drinker so I don't have anyone to share my AF journey with. I'm incredibly tired has anyone else experienced this.

    Sure ! I can relate - secret drinkers are plentiful. I watched a Video on tedtalk. You might get value from.

    It's the author of "Drink". https://youtu.be/LqtZjpI1oVQ

    It may be geared to women but I think any drinker can relate. Xo
  • SunnyDays930
    SunnyDays930 Posts: 1,573 Member
    Loved this, Julie, thanks for sharing. I read her book a few years ago. It is very powerful. Norm, good to see you again! Welcome to the new friends. We are glad you have joined us.
  • mainelylisa
    mainelylisa Posts: 375 Member
    whitpauly wrote: »
    ...and I hope whoever woo'ed it meant woo hoo! Have a fabulous AF day guys <3

    Oh my gosh! I've woo'd several posts and I meant Woo-Hooo! I'm so sorry!
  • mbaker566
    mbaker566 Posts: 11,233 Member
    for some people, an alcoholic is still the deadbeat or bum. and before there was knowledge of the disease that was usually what happened to an alcoholic if they didn't end up in prison or die first
    thankfully, people can get help now. and find other people with the same problem.
    remember your secrets bind you in shame.
  • mainelylisa
    mainelylisa Posts: 375 Member
    Bobby959 wrote: »
    Hi I'm on day 5 of being AF. I have been heavily drinking for 10 to 15 years but I have been a secret drinker so I don't have anyone to share my AF journey with. I'm incredibly tired has anyone else experienced this.

    I'm on Day 5 and also a secret drinker when I'm not being a social drinker. I'm a bit tired--but not bloated and not feeling poisoned-tired. This is a great community and non-judgmental. And to Ruby's point, check out TedTalks--there are a lot of inspiring stories. And here's a story of a journalist who kept a secret for a long time, until it came out. https://abcnews.go.com/Health/abc-news-anchor-elizabeth-vargas-long-battle-alcoholism/story?id=41980399

    Hugs...
  • whitpauly
    whitpauly Posts: 1,483 Member
    whitpauly wrote: »
    ...and I hope whoever woo'ed it meant woo hoo! Have a fabulous AF day guys <3

    Oh my gosh! I've woo'd several posts and I meant Woo-Hooo! I'm so sorry!

    Haha,I figured,they need to get something to replace woo I think its too confusing
  • Bobby959
    Bobby959 Posts: 3 Member
    Thank you great video
  • jhilkene
    jhilkene Posts: 104 Member
    I've been meaning to respond but every time I start I have to walk away and then the message clears :anguished:

    @whitpauly and @RubyRed427 touching on what you both said earlier..
    I heard someone say (I think it was on MFP somewhere)..
    Comparison is a thief of joy, in many cases.
    Sometimes we use it as an excuse or a reason for our actions.

    Drinking wasn't yet affecting my job, family, or responsibilities, it was affecting me. Like @RubyRed427 said, why would I want to wait until it got worse to change it, when it was already having a negative impact on my well being? Using the buzz as a reward or crutch during a bad time wasn't really changing reality. After the drinks, the problems were still there in addition to dehydration, stomach problems, bad breath, brain fuzz, lethargy, liver/kidney issues, skin issues, bloating, weight gain, less cash, etc..

    The itch to get the Halloween drinks is real... but I know i'll feel guilty buying anything, and it won't be worth the buzz. Also, as many of you have said, it is nice to remember the fun times, and I think we can have a fun Halloween WOA! B)
  • SunnyDays930
    SunnyDays930 Posts: 1,573 Member
    @jhilkene Comparison is a thief of joy, in many cases.
    Sometimes we use it as an excuse or a reason for our actions.

    This is brilliant. Thank you. I"m going to write that down and put it where I can see it every day.