Your favorite/memorable Seinfeld quotes or episodes?

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  • chellaJKR
    chellaJKR Posts: 146
    Chest hair
    "I CAN'T STOP!"
  • holly_v
    holly_v Posts: 292 Member
    [Puddy is wearing a bright orange jacket with an 8 ball on it]
    Elaine: What's this? What happened to your fur?
    David Puddy: I saw Jerry wearing his. He looked like a bit of a dandy. Check this out. 8 ball. You got a question, you ask the 8 ball.
    Elaine: So you're going to wear this all the time?
    David Puddy: All signs point to yes.

    everything puddy said was hilarious.
  • Unknown
    Unknown
    This content has been removed.
  • MisterDubs303
    MisterDubs303 Posts: 1,216 Member
    Titleist?

    Oh Yeah

    "Is that a Titleist?" has got to be the best!!! So predictable, and they paused to allow the audience to anticipate it. Not only a great line, but great directing!
  • pacmanjack
    pacmanjack Posts: 866 Member
    "The sea was angry that day, my friends..... Like an old man trying to return soup at a deli."
  • sillygoose1977
    sillygoose1977 Posts: 2,151 Member
    "You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister!"
  • tashjs21
    tashjs21 Posts: 4,584 Member
    When Jerry dates the woman that is only pretty in certain lighting. :laugh:


    Love any episode with Puddy...especially when he goes religious and Elaine makes the "devil face"


    and of course any time this happened

    elaine_sequence-frontpage.gif
  • tashjs21
    tashjs21 Posts: 4,584 Member
    After I had my daughter I always remembered the "look at the baby" episode. :laugh:
  • BeeElMarvin
    BeeElMarvin Posts: 2,086 Member
    Festivus For the Rest of Us
  • BeeElMarvin
    BeeElMarvin Posts: 2,086 Member
    (To the tune of Greatest American Hero)...

    Believe it or not
    George isn't at home...

    hilarious, I had it on my answering machine after that!
  • c2sky
    c2sky Posts: 487 Member
    There was no pick!
  • susanswan
    susanswan Posts: 1,194 Member
    There was an episode where Jerry was trying to express anger (in often inappropriate scenarios) to prove Elaine wrong because she commented that he is never angry and always went with the flow.

    They were sitting in their diner booth and the waitress explained that they only had 2% milk and would that be OK? Jerry decided this was unacceptable and said to the waitress... "2% Milk? You can kiss 2% of my *kitten*!"

    I don't know why that has stuck in my mind....

    BTW - I grew up in NY Metro area (Northern NJ) and thought Sienfeld was hysterical... but I've noticed that folks in other parts of the country don't always appreciate the Seinfeld humor.

    Now that I'm getting ready for a 2 week vacation in India/Nepal this fall, I've been thinking lately of the episode where they all went to India for a wedding and George painted his hiking shoes black, since he thought he was taller in them and wore them instead of shoes and of course that his neurosis prevented him from going to the bathroom the whole time he was in India (luckily it was a short trip!).

    I'm from California and still watch the reruns when I can! I know them all by heart just like I Love Lucy, but still watch them anyway. A friend of my husband's told me everything in life relates to Seinfeld, and now he's got me doing it mentally, anyway. Somebody sneezes: "You're soooo good lookin'!" Ha! Ha! There is no deprogramming from Seinfeld. Once you've seen it you've got it with you always!

    Man Hands!
  • sillygoose1977
    sillygoose1977 Posts: 2,151 Member
    "He took it out."

    "He took it out?"

    "He took. It out."
  • Scorpiomom222
    Scorpiomom222 Posts: 1,462 Member
    When Jerry dates the woman that is only pretty in certain lighting. :laugh:


    Love any episode with Puddy...especially when he goes religious and Elaine makes the "devil face"


    and of course any time this happened

    elaine_sequence-frontpage.gif

    OH SHIIIIIIT! AHAHAHAHA I LOVED it when Elaine would dance! LMFAO
  • darkrider42
    darkrider42 Posts: 5,415 Member
    After I had my daughter I always remembered the "look at the baby" episode. :laugh:

    YES!!!!!!!!! UGLY BABY!!!!!! "Breathtaking..." :laugh:

    Oh my gosh, you are all so making this the best day I've had in a loooong time!

    Thanks! :flowerforyou:


    ETA: Stupid AutoCorrect...
  • darkrider42
    darkrider42 Posts: 5,415 Member
    The Man Hands episode... I can't controll my laughter when they are out to dinner and she wipes something off of his face with her giant thumb... BAHHHH HAHAHAAH....

    That episode literally* had me on the floor laughing!


    ETA: *GAH!* AutoCorrect is driving me nuts!
  • porcelain_doll
    porcelain_doll Posts: 1,005 Member
    "He took it out."

    "He took it out?"

    "He took. It out."

    LOL!!!!!!!! "He took...." (huffs on glasses) "....it out."
    "It."
    "It."
    "Out."
    "Out."
    "Got any more 'friends' you want to set me up with, Jerry?"
    Love this scene!!!
  • tashjs21
    tashjs21 Posts: 4,584 Member
    Eating a snickers with a fork.



    And to the poster about the sneezing...I totally think that too when someone sneezes! :laugh:



    You stopped to get ju ju bees?
  • darkrider42
    darkrider42 Posts: 5,415 Member
    Fusilli Jerry

    The. A s s man

    "You were making out during Schindler's List?!?"
  • ericjr7210
    ericjr7210 Posts: 40 Member
    Im OUT... as Kramer slaps a $50 on the counter after 15 minutes (or less)
  • alisa1973
    alisa1973 Posts: 37 Member
    shrinkage
  • tashjs21
    tashjs21 Posts: 4,584 Member
    Elaine failing her drug test for poppy see bagels. :laugh:
  • tashjs21
    tashjs21 Posts: 4,584 Member
    "The boys do notice my diet and that I eat more each day,’ she said.

    ‘I tell them that everybody likes different things. If I'm making something fatty and they want something healthy, then I make us different meals.’



    Thank God she is at least looking after the health of her children. :frown: I hope they continue to want to stay healthy and don't follow in her footsteps.
  • corpus_validum
    corpus_validum Posts: 292 Member
    Vandelay Industries
  • CapitalE
    CapitalE Posts: 30
    "Man, that Michael Jordon - He's so phony"
  • I_give_it_2_u_str8
    I_give_it_2_u_str8 Posts: 680 Member
    kramer: hi..uh...im a.g. pennypacker, im a wealthy american industrialist, uhh, looking to open a silvermine in the mountains of peru, and uhh..,before i invest millions in a lucrative mine, id like to go a little native, get a feel for their garments, their unmeantionables,...you know the real,,...gritty gritty *as he chomps on tortilla chips*

    puddamayo lady: ...let me show you what we've got...

    kramer: i think i can just browse around on my own *as he's got a mouthful of tortilla chips*.... mmmmm machu pichu.... are these free? *eats some more and starts to choke*..

    ahaha i love it
  • darkrider42
    darkrider42 Posts: 5,415 Member
    Kramer making dinner (rinsing his lettuce?) while taking a shower to save time! LOL

    The Merv Griffin Show

    George, [at Monk's with Jerry]: "So she coughed."

    Jerry: "Coughing... naked... It's a turn-off, man."

    George: "Everything goes with naked."

    Jerry: "When you cough, there are thousands of unseen muscles that suddenly spring into action. It's like watching that fat guy catch a cannonball in his stomach in slow motion."

    George: "Oh, you spoiled, spoiled man. Do you now how much mental energy I expend just trying to picture women naked?"

    Jerry: "But the thing you don't realize is that there's good naked and bad naked. Naked hair brushing, good; naked crouching, bad." :laugh:

    ETA: Had* to provide full quote.
  • toots99
    toots99 Posts: 3,794 Member
    Guy at party: The ocean called, they're running out of shrimp.

    George: The jerk store called, they're running out of you!
  • toots99
    toots99 Posts: 3,794 Member
    Hmmm....

    I probably use 'Hello Newman' the most lol (I always say it to my nephew.. who is clueless LOL)

    I used to see Newman in the supermarket all the time, and I always wanted to say that to him but figured everyone did that to him! I'd always think "Newman!!!"
  • smallerthighs
    smallerthighs Posts: 148
    Shrinkage
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