I'm logical. I understand CI/CO. I'm fully on board.
But my husband defies logic, to me. He tracks his food, I watch him. He doesn't skip things, he uses a scale, he does it right. I've helped him calculate his calories.
He is 5'10", 195lbs. He is aiming to lose 15-20 more pounds. His weight has plateaued around 196-197 for months.
He's eating 2100 calories, he has gone as low as 1800 calories but that wasn't sustainable. We work out at a fairly high intensity 3x a week, doing heavy weight lifting and HIIT (at least 2 of 3 workouts). We have been working out for over 6 months, but we did increase the intensity in July.
What I don't get? I'm in maintenance. I struggle to NOT lose weight in maintenance. What do I eat? 2100 calories. I am 5'0", 112lb female. I'm supposed to be in recomp.
Funny thing though, he's doing a great job recomping. He's lost 2.5" off his waist, 1.5" off his neck, and 2" off his hips - in 6 weeks. 1.5lbs off the scale in those 6 weeks.
I am glad he's recomping, but what gives? We got fitbits last week, I know we haven't had them long. Mine tells me I averaged 2085 calories in the past 4 days, which makes my 2100 make perfect sense. His says he averaged 3400 calories. He did have a couple of super busy days, but even his slow at home day it says he burned 2900 calories. If he is averaging so far above 2100 calories, why is he only seeing body composition changes not scale changes? I'd get it if it were 2-3 weeks, but we have almost 7 weeks and it's getting frustrating?
Kind of a rant. Maybe someone could offer some suggestions? We're really happy with the changes to his body, it's visible. But he'd really like to see the scale move. I don't think we can (or should) cut calories further if he's burning so much, but what else can we do? Am I unreasonable to expect 2-4lbs a month loss at a deficit over 750 calories?
Just kind of ranting, looking for suggestions. He's going to keep eating 2100 and exercising.
ExistingFish
Member Posts: 1,113 Member
Member Posts: 1,113 Member
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And yes, 2-4 lbs a month of loss is unreasonable, unsustainable, and un-healthy in the long run. If you have little to lose as your picture seems to indicate, your more likely to achieve a .25 lb loss/wk optimally... this would average to about a lb a month. Anything more is likely to be too much of a deficit to get the proper nutrition that you'll need at that activity level.
She's asking why her *husband* isn't losing. Not why she is.
FWIW, 2100 is right about maintenance for me.
If his calorie burn is higher, why is he maintaining his weight on the same calorie level that I am maintaining?
I am not trying to lose weight. I am at a healthy weight and body fat level. My husband is trying to lose weight, he is overweight and is not at a healthy body fat level. I don't think 2lbs of loss per month is unreasonable for a 195lb man in a deficit, that is 0.5lb/week.
Beyond that, I find positive physical changes to be for more important than some arbitrary number on the scale.
As for recomp, that's easy, he's a dude and you aren't. They put on muscle faster and easier than women*. If he likes how his body looks, why does the number on the scale matter? There's no prize for being lighter, and if you're fit then you aren't necessarily gonna be healthier.
*As a generalization over total populations, based on hormones and stuff. Obviously individual genetics plays into this as well.
Thanks! I am guessing it is close to maintenance for him as well, but it doesn't make sense to me.
Why not?
Another thing to consider... is he (are you) using a trend weight app? Might be easier to see what scale weight is doing if you look at trends/averages over longer periods of time.
He really just started again at the first of June after several months of not. He didn't gain or lose during those months, just working out. I guess natural maintenance.
I do too, I am quite frankly shocked. If I didn't measure him myself I wouldn't believe it, but I measured him both times. I can see it though, in the fit of his clothes.
He's just frustrated about his weight, and it affects his mood.
He isn't very fit. He's more active than average, but he is overweight (BMI standards) and has quite a bit of body fat around the middle. We've never tested body fat, but by the visual estimate pictures he has an overweight level of body fat.
Because I'm almost literally half his size (by weight), and I'm not trying to lose weight, how could an almost 200lb man with nearly a foot of height require the same maintenance calories as me?
We both use trendweight apps, I use Libra (which I love) he has an Apple one, which I don't care for as much. He's in the green, and stays there, so he's going down, but it is such a slow crawl.
Ah, there it is... comparison. No wonder you're frustrated/annoyed/confused/whatever.
I honestly used to think this. Or just forgetting to log something, but I've been watching him more closely since he's been complaining about not losing, and I haven't noticed anything. I even help him find accurate entries in MFP all the time. We log our food together often.
I'm also a firm believer in CICO, but my experience over the past year -- turned out I had a broken body scale, and I'm 15 pounds heavier than I thought I was, but am simultaneously at my lowest measurements ever, and have been eating in a known deficit this whole time, *with* all food being weighed and tracked, just to get that part of intake shaming/judgment out there -- is that recomp and muscle gain/fat loss isn't as simple as "eat the same" or "eat a deficit". I don't think it's necessarily as black and white as people like to make it sound. And that's backed up by an RD I work with who specifically works with athletes/in sports medicine nutrition.
I built out a Google spreadsheet that outlines pretty clearly what I've been seeing, with tracked decreases in body fat percentage. PM me if you want it, OP -- it might be helpful to see what another zebra looks like.
As far as I can tell, we have had the same scale since we moved in together (before we were married) and we've been married 9 years, it's an XOXO that is still widely recommended on these boards. He's been using it correctly for a long time, it's the same one I use.
...maybe weight's just a number and isn't the end all be all.
what about when he is at work etc. he may snack all the time and not log it
Are you together 24/7? do neither of you work outside the home? People see me and think I eat nothing, even my wife. But there's no limit to how much food I can and do sneak at times.