Guess whats in my pocket?
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Replies
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My sock0
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A sock puppet named Murray that she puts on her hand, feels herself up and loudly says "Ohhhh Murray, you Scoundrel!"1
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a small spiral notebook in which he has written his most favorite romance novel phrases. His favorites are "her quivering mounds" and "his volcanic eruption".0
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Her latest job performance review crumpled into a ball. Her Supervisor wrote "Spends entirely too much time talking about butts". Beside his signature, she drew a butt.0
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Corn on the cob.. for a snack attack0
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A cornless cob for a phallus attack1
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An eyepatch. Oftentimes he will put it on and whenever someone asks about it he'll say he lost his eye when he was constipated and pushed "a little too hard".0
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The resin encased left eye of a man named Bernie that she met during a drunken night in Saskatoon. Its the only thing she has left of him anymore, after his ears deteriorated anyway. She still chuckles when she looks into it and sighs.."Oh, Bernie"0
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An RFID chip recently pulled from a neighborhood fox. Trackers are now wondering how a fox could go 60mph and why the fox feels the need to visit Hooters everyday around 6pm.0
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A piece of fur. He likes to tell people its from a rare wolf he saw in his back yard. We all know its actually lint from his dryer but we like him so we humor him.0
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Hot pocket0
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A wrapper from a fortune cookie they found on the street, a torn dollar and some cookie crumbs.0
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Sunflower seeds and 3 paperclips chained together0
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A 🥓 bacon wrapped wallet
Haha my son had one!0 -
A geriatric hamster named Mr. Sniffykins0
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A little crutch made out of two toothpicks glued together to give to Mr. Sniffykins one day.0
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Dollar bills0
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A rubberband0
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A rubber chicken shes carried for years. One day....one day itll pay off0
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