Online Dating.
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mattig89ch wrote: »TarryTaffy wrote: »XxFunctionalStrengthxX wrote: »Sadly, it's true. It's common knowledge here that many married people like to flirt, play etc with others here. Same is true for many online communities, unfortunately.
Trigger warning... un-PC reply. If anyone objects, my apologies, but then move along... I'm only talking about my own experiences.
Yes, I've seen what I call the harem builders... guys, mostly married (according to them), who have 50-150 friends, all women, most in seductive, scantily clad selfies. It is what it is... no judgment... they're all willing participants. That's a good chunk of who has initially contacted me (I've since had to weed them out... more below)... & there's the young lad sect, too, who like to collect compliments from middle-aged women... they've got their own harems... but when I don't respond how either group would like after they send me a pic of their abs/guns, in the guise of "hey, check out my dog" & I can only see a dog tail behind their Hulk Hogan, shirtless/sleeveless-tee pose or their "hey, can I be your next bf" email, they delete me, in most cases, or I delete them, cuz they're looking for major flirt & I just don't have or want to take the time.
Those same guys pummel me with lots of personal q's... it's exhausting, so I just don't accept a lot of friend requests anymore, when they fall into the above scenarios. I'm not saying they're doing anything wrong (I don't embed myself into other's relationships/innocent flirtations or otherwise... that's for their SO's to deal with... leave me out of it), but I'm mainly here to record calories, write a few semi-amusing posts to interact with others & enjoy the many with great hearts or senses of humor... I see a lot of the latter, fortunately.
I find so many people here to be clever, funny & good hearted souls, by far... those are the ones I enjoy. My friends list is currently a collection of lovely souls... male & female. I love when women contact me for friendship. Conversely, those women I've contacted to be friends (just 2) have so far declined, haha. Se la vie...
You know, if you look at my friends list you'd think I'd fall into this category as well. But I've received more requests from women, then men. Seems like men just don't want to be my MFP friend.
I also delete requests that come with no message attached to them. If someone wants to actually be a weight loss buddy, the least they could do is write out a quick little 'hey, you seem nice/cool/[insert other adjective here]. Wanna be friends?' sort of message.
Oh, so that's why you haven't accepted my request? I see. 🙄
Unless I forgot to send it 😭😭😭2 -
TarryTaffy wrote: »XxFunctionalStrengthxX wrote: »I definitely remember how different it is up north. I lived in WY for several years after my undergrad. I clearly recall a man asking me what was wrong with me that I didn’t have kids or an ex-husband. At 22-23. At that very moment I knew that was a place I had to leave.
I've encountered this mostly in the southeast. I worked in Atlanta with young girls who had several divorces, kids by each husband & were 20-21. I was 30 at the time... no divorces, no kids. Everyday they'd ask why, am I gay, is it some weird Yankee thing that infected me, haha.Now, I have no preference about whether someone has been married before, but I absolutely will not ever, under any circumstances date anyone who has, or wants to have children. I’d rather die alone and buy a cat to eat my face off than deal with children of any age. Much less SIX children with no baby mama to dump them off on. I just could not believe that someone wouldn’t mention that ever in a dating profile or during a week of emails/texting.
I once went on a 1st date with a guy who I'd spoken to on the phone a number of times. At lunch, he suddenly dropped that he had 2 kids, 2-yrs & 4-mos... & a crazy ex-gf. Oh, great! He said the crazy gf "got pregnant" (as if he was't in the room at the time), they decided to buy a house so they could be a family (cuz if someone's crazy, it's a great idea to not use protection, then enter into a real estate contract with them), then they had a 2nd baby (cuz it's even better to continually procreate with a crazy, now-ex) & told me umpteen accounts on how he had to repeatedly call police as she refused to drop off the kids with him for visitation. This PhD college professor then left his profession & took a job as a waiter, so he didn't have to pay much in child support & apparently, she left a lucrative career & went on welfare so he'd have to pay for everything.
What a prize of a man... let me at 'em! More importantly, those poor kids.
I was insulted that he thought I, or any woman, would want to step into this nightmare of a situation. All his stories told me were what incredibly awful decisions he makes... repeatedly. I left smoke running away from the restaurant.
And, although I described him as a "waste of makeup" to my friends, honestly... I'm just glad I found out before we dated for 1-mo or 6. I'm thankful he at least revealed himself on the 1st date... it should have been sooner, but it still saved me any heartache.
I hope your next date is far better! Mine, too! Have a wonderful 2020!
All I have to say about this whole post is...
People are CRAZY!!!1 -
Well, I’ve signed up on a couple of dating sites again.
For those who don’t know me, I had met my incredible husband this way 15 years ago. I lost him in March 2018 to ALS.
So, I’m hoping to meet a nice guy and see what happens. Hopefully, something amazing.
Well, I have my first date in 15 years tomorrow. We met online yesterday and have been texting and talking on the phone almost constantly since. Keep your fingers crossed and send me good juju! 😉9 -
Well, I’ve signed up on a couple of dating sites again.
For those who don’t know me, I had met my incredible husband this way 15 years ago. I lost him in March 2018 to ALS.
So, I’m hoping to meet a nice guy and see what happens. Hopefully, something amazing.
Well, I have my first date in 15 years tomorrow. We met online yesterday and have been texting and talking on the phone almost constantly since. Keep your fingers crossed and send me good juju! 😉
How exciting! Good luck!
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Well, I’ve signed up on a couple of dating sites again.
For those who don’t know me, I had met my incredible husband this way 15 years ago. I lost him in March 2018 to ALS.
So, I’m hoping to meet a nice guy and see what happens. Hopefully, something amazing.
Well, I have my first date in 15 years tomorrow. We met online yesterday and have been texting and talking on the phone almost constantly since. Keep your fingers crossed and send me good juju! 😉
Positive thoughts your way! It’s going to go great!
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Well, I’ve signed up on a couple of dating sites again.
For those who don’t know me, I had met my incredible husband this way 15 years ago. I lost him in March 2018 to ALS.
So, I’m hoping to meet a nice guy and see what happens. Hopefully, something amazing.
Well, I have my first date in 15 years tomorrow. We met online yesterday and have been texting and talking on the phone almost constantly since. Keep your fingers crossed and send me good juju! 😉
good luck1 -
OMG, best first date EVER! We kept it simple. Met in a public venue, went for lunch, he’d bought me a gorgeous Victoria’s Secret lounging pajama set, he’s a great kisser, he wants to see me again. All in all, a great date! 💋14
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OMG, best first date EVER! We kept it simple. Met in a public venue, went for lunch, he’d bought me a gorgeous Victoria’s Secret lounging pajama set, he’s a great kisser, he wants to see me again. All in all, a great date! 💋
I'm happy for you! Have you been talking a while or am I supposed to bring a gift of that magnitude on a first date?7 -
OMG, best first date EVER! We kept it simple. Met in a public venue, went for lunch, he’d bought me a gorgeous Victoria’s Secret lounging pajama set, he’s a great kisser, he wants to see me again. All in all, a great date! 💋
I'm happy for you! Have you been talking a while or am I supposed to bring a gift of that magnitude on a first date?
I mean, they are having their semi annual sale right now...5 -
OMG, best first date EVER! We kept it simple. Met in a public venue, went for lunch, he’d bought me a gorgeous Victoria’s Secret lounging pajama set, he’s a great kisser, he wants to see me again. All in all, a great date! 💋
I'm happy for you! Have you been talking a while or am I supposed to bring a gift of that magnitude on a first date?
No we haven’t been talking long, only 3 days, but we’ve talked for many hours each day. Plus, being 62 and 55, we probably cover a lot more ground than younger people do.
You’re probably ok with a simple gift or no gift at all, depending on how much you want intrigue your date. 😄3 -
OMG, best first date EVER! We kept it simple. Met in a public venue, went for lunch, he’d bought me a gorgeous Victoria’s Secret lounging pajama set, he’s a great kisser, he wants to see me again. All in all, a great date! 💋
I'm happy for you! Have you been talking a while or am I supposed to bring a gift of that magnitude on a first date?
I was a little taken aback by the gift as well.5 -
When my wife and I were first dating I got her a flower but WHO KNEW that there was some weird cocoon on it and so when I gave it to her in the car and bugs started flying everywhere it created memories and set the bar sufficiently low thank GOD4
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Woohoo, we have another date tomorrow! 😘10
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TarryTaffy wrote: »XxFunctionalStrengthxX wrote: »Sadly, it's true. It's common knowledge here that many married people like to flirt, play etc with others here. Same is true for many online communities, unfortunately.
Trigger warning... un-PC reply. If anyone objects, my apologies, but then move along... I'm only talking about my own experiences.
Yes, I've seen what I call the harem builders... guys, mostly married (according to them), who have 50-150 friends, all women, most in seductive, scantily clad selfies. It is what it is... no judgment... they're all willing participants. That's a good chunk of who has initially contacted me (I've since had to weed them out... more below)... & there's the young lad sect, too, who like to collect compliments from middle-aged women... they've got their own harems... but when I don't respond how either group would like after they send me a pic of their abs/guns, in the guise of "hey, check out my dog" & I can only see a dog tail behind their Hulk Hogan, shirtless/sleeveless-tee pose or their "hey, can I be your next bf" email, they delete me, in most cases, or I delete them, cuz they're looking for major flirt & I just don't have or want to take the time.
Those same guys pummel me with lots of personal q's... it's exhausting, so I just don't accept a lot of friend requests anymore, when they fall into the above scenarios. I'm not saying they're doing anything wrong (I don't embed myself into other's relationships/innocent flirtations or otherwise... that's for their SO's to deal with... leave me out of it), but I'm mainly here to record calories, write a few semi-amusing posts to interact with others & enjoy the many with great hearts or senses of humor... I see a lot of the latter, fortunately.
I find so many people here to be clever, funny & good hearted souls, by far... those are the ones I enjoy. My friends list is currently a collection of lovely souls... male & female. I love when women contact me for friendship. Conversely, those women I've contacted to be friends (just 2) have so far declined, haha. Se la vie...XxFunctionalStrengthxX wrote: »I'm much more of an amber bach or lager drinker, I've found that IPA's are just a bit to tart/bitter for my tastes. But, I'd gladly buy you one. And, while it may be considered rude to turn down a beer given to someone, I don't think it is if it's given to someone who actually enjoys an IPA.
BTW, great pic.
Lol. I understand... most I know are lite beer drinkers. I enjoy darker flavors... rye/black bread, as opposed to white... ristretto (double strength espresso, black) as opposed to coffee... stout/IPA only. Not for everyone... that's fine... we all differ, no judgment.
🤗 I didn't decline 😙1 -
slimgirljo15 wrote: »🤗 I didn't decline 😙
True. You FR me... no matter, it worked out well in the end!1 -
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I did. Successful every time.1
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I have not found it very fruitful. I've used tried various sites off and on for the 7 years now since my wife left. Over that time, I've
* Met up with someone once, have her as FB friend but barely interact with her
* Been messaged by one woman who was a Young Earth Creationist while my profile indicated I'm an atheist. I wouldn't be opposed to someone somewhat religious, but someone that thinks the world is only 6,000 years old is too far apart a worldview from me.
* Been messaged by a woman who wondered if I would be her FWB since her husband is asexual. It would be expected that I would be exclusive to her though. This would also involve me being friends with the husband. Which, I mean, if that's what they want to do, ok. I'm just couldn't be in relationship with no real future and I don't think I could be like, "Oh hey buddy, let me go take care of our girl, then you and me are getting on the Xbox. Cool?"
* Dozen of messages on Plenty of Fish that were just scammers. Some of them using the same woman's set of pictures - like if PoF had any kind fraud prevention, this person would never have an account.
* Talked to one woman who after about 5 lines started talking about how she was going to go get on a plane like she was fishing for me to try to stop her. Pretty sure it was a scam.
* Talked to one woman who was nice to talk to but then just stopped responding 1 week later. We just kind of talked about music and kids, and then radio silence.
* Received on message from a woman asking about getting coffee sometime after quarantine, just for her to ask to go to emailing and get emailed by a Russian, almost certainly scam.
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magnusthenerd wrote: »I have not found it very fruitful. I've used tried various sites off and on for the 7 years now since my wife left. Over that time, I've
* Met up with someone once, have her as FB friend but barely interact with her
* Been messaged by one woman who was a Young Earth Creationist while my profile indicated I'm an atheist. I wouldn't be opposed to someone somewhat religious, but someone that thinks the world is only 6,000 years old is too far apart a worldview from me.
* Been messaged by a woman who wondered if I would be her FWB since her husband is asexual. It would be expected that I would be exclusive to her though. This would also involve me being friends with the husband. Which, I mean, if that's what they want to do, ok. I'm just couldn't be in relationship with no real future and I don't think I could be like, "Oh hey buddy, let me go take care of our girl, then you and me are getting on the Xbox. Cool?"
* Dozen of messages on Plenty of Fish that were just scammers. Some of them using the same woman's set of pictures - like if PoF had any kind fraud prevention, this person would never have an account.
* Talked to one woman who after about 5 lines started talking about how she was going to go get on a plane like she was fishing for me to try to stop her. Pretty sure it was a scam.
* Talked to one woman who was nice to talk to but then just stopped responding 1 week later. We just kind of talked about music and kids, and then radio silence.
* Received on message from a woman asking about getting coffee sometime after quarantine, just for her to ask to go to emailing and get emailed by a Russian, almost certainly scam.
Have you tried other apps besides pof...pof is kind of a blah app. I've had most success on bumble and hinge.0
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