Online Dating.
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PlentyofProtein00 wrote: »magnusthenerd wrote: »I have not found it very fruitful. I've used tried various sites off and on for the 7 years now since my wife left. Over that time, I've
* Met up with someone once, have her as FB friend but barely interact with her
* Been messaged by one woman who was a Young Earth Creationist while my profile indicated I'm an atheist. I wouldn't be opposed to someone somewhat religious, but someone that thinks the world is only 6,000 years old is too far apart a worldview from me.
* Been messaged by a woman who wondered if I would be her FWB since her husband is asexual. It would be expected that I would be exclusive to her though. This would also involve me being friends with the husband. Which, I mean, if that's what they want to do, ok. I'm just couldn't be in relationship with no real future and I don't think I could be like, "Oh hey buddy, let me go take care of our girl, then you and me are getting on the Xbox. Cool?"
* Dozen of messages on Plenty of Fish that were just scammers. Some of them using the same woman's set of pictures - like if PoF had any kind fraud prevention, this person would never have an account.
* Talked to one woman who after about 5 lines started talking about how she was going to go get on a plane like she was fishing for me to try to stop her. Pretty sure it was a scam.
* Talked to one woman who was nice to talk to but then just stopped responding 1 week later. We just kind of talked about music and kids, and then radio silence.
* Received on message from a woman asking about getting coffee sometime after quarantine, just for her to ask to go to emailing and get emailed by a Russian, almost certainly scam.
Have you tried other apps besides pof...pof is kind of a blah app. I've had most success on bumble and hinge.
Actually never heard of hinge, thanks. All I ever got out of Bumble was a laugh at finding my older sister's friend's profile and telling her I treated it Baptists in the liquor store: I didn't see her there, she didn't see me.
The first 3 things I described were on OkCupid. The two after PoF were on Tinder. The Russian scam was on Zoosk. I've tried a few others too.
The experience on any site is a bit different for men looking for men versus women looking for men. I'm always surprised how many women are complaining about guys "playing games", "sending **** pics", or "just looking to get laid". I have no interest in any of that.
I guess nearly 40 with two kids who's got interests both in nerdy stuff and being fit isn't high on compatibility. In my area it seems everyone wants someone for kayaking. Or maybe I'm just ugly and bad with fashion.
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No so much into online dating. But I’d be interested in more MFP friends.1
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magnusthenerd wrote: »PlentyofProtein00 wrote: »magnusthenerd wrote: »I have not found it very fruitful. I've used tried various sites off and on for the 7 years now since my wife left. Over that time, I've
* Met up with someone once, have her as FB friend but barely interact with her
* Been messaged by one woman who was a Young Earth Creationist while my profile indicated I'm an atheist. I wouldn't be opposed to someone somewhat religious, but someone that thinks the world is only 6,000 years old is too far apart a worldview from me.
* Been messaged by a woman who wondered if I would be her FWB since her husband is asexual. It would be expected that I would be exclusive to her though. This would also involve me being friends with the husband. Which, I mean, if that's what they want to do, ok. I'm just couldn't be in relationship with no real future and I don't think I could be like, "Oh hey buddy, let me go take care of our girl, then you and me are getting on the Xbox. Cool?"
* Dozen of messages on Plenty of Fish that were just scammers. Some of them using the same woman's set of pictures - like if PoF had any kind fraud prevention, this person would never have an account.
* Talked to one woman who after about 5 lines started talking about how she was going to go get on a plane like she was fishing for me to try to stop her. Pretty sure it was a scam.
* Talked to one woman who was nice to talk to but then just stopped responding 1 week later. We just kind of talked about music and kids, and then radio silence.
* Received on message from a woman asking about getting coffee sometime after quarantine, just for her to ask to go to emailing and get emailed by a Russian, almost certainly scam.
Have you tried other apps besides pof...pof is kind of a blah app. I've had most success on bumble and hinge.
Actually never heard of hinge, thanks. All I ever got out of Bumble was a laugh at finding my older sister's friend's profile and telling her I treated it Baptists in the liquor store: I didn't see her there, she didn't see me.
The first 3 things I described were on OkCupid. The two after PoF were on Tinder. The Russian scam was on Zoosk. I've tried a few others too.
The experience on any site is a bit different for men looking for men versus women looking for men. I'm always surprised how many women are complaining about guys "playing games", "sending **** pics", or "just looking to get laid". I have no interest in any of that.
I guess nearly 40 with two kids who's got interests both in nerdy stuff and being fit isn't high on compatibility. In my area it seems everyone wants someone for kayaking. Or maybe I'm just ugly and bad with fashion.
I have heard of the issues you've described that men have dealt with. And I'll be honest, if I'm not laughing and vibing with the guy's personality I just move on. Looks are a priority but for me I've come across some very Nice/Kind men...and our humor just wasnt the same...and hey!? What's wrong with kayaking??? 😂0 -
I don't know, people put in their profile and I feel like I'm without a paddle and just can't go with the flow.PlentyofProtein00 wrote: »magnusthenerd wrote: »PlentyofProtein00 wrote: »magnusthenerd wrote: »I have not found it very fruitful. I've used tried various sites off and on for the 7 years now since my wife left. Over that time, I've
* Met up with someone once, have her as FB friend but barely interact with her
* Been messaged by one woman who was a Young Earth Creationist while my profile indicated I'm an atheist. I wouldn't be opposed to someone somewhat religious, but someone that thinks the world is only 6,000 years old is too far apart a worldview from me.
* Been messaged by a woman who wondered if I would be her FWB since her husband is asexual. It would be expected that I would be exclusive to her though. This would also involve me being friends with the husband. Which, I mean, if that's what they want to do, ok. I'm just couldn't be in relationship with no real future and I don't think I could be like, "Oh hey buddy, let me go take care of our girl, then you and me are getting on the Xbox. Cool?"
* Dozen of messages on Plenty of Fish that were just scammers. Some of them using the same woman's set of pictures - like if PoF had any kind fraud prevention, this person would never have an account.
* Talked to one woman who after about 5 lines started talking about how she was going to go get on a plane like she was fishing for me to try to stop her. Pretty sure it was a scam.
* Talked to one woman who was nice to talk to but then just stopped responding 1 week later. We just kind of talked about music and kids, and then radio silence.
* Received on message from a woman asking about getting coffee sometime after quarantine, just for her to ask to go to emailing and get emailed by a Russian, almost certainly scam.
Have you tried other apps besides pof...pof is kind of a blah app. I've had most success on bumble and hinge.
Actually never heard of hinge, thanks. All I ever got out of Bumble was a laugh at finding my older sister's friend's profile and telling her I treated it Baptists in the liquor store: I didn't see her there, she didn't see me.
The first 3 things I described were on OkCupid. The two after PoF were on Tinder. The Russian scam was on Zoosk. I've tried a few others too.
The experience on any site is a bit different for men looking for men versus women looking for men. I'm always surprised how many women are complaining about guys "playing games", "sending **** pics", or "just looking to get laid". I have no interest in any of that.
I guess nearly 40 with two kids who's got interests both in nerdy stuff and being fit isn't high on compatibility. In my area it seems everyone wants someone for kayaking. Or maybe I'm just ugly and bad with fashion.
I have heard of the issues you've described that men have dealt with. And I'll be honest, if I'm not laughing and vibing with the guy's personality I just move on. Looks are a priority but for me I've come across some very Nice/Kind men...and our humor just wasnt the same...and hey!? What's wrong with kayaking??? 😂
Could be worse. Some people talk about loving sarcasm like it really is something rare. The worst are the people that say they like to have fun - I always want to ask those people who've the met that dislikes fun because I'm interested in how that could work. Or the women who like guys that are attractive. Not traits that are, just they like guys that are attractive.
I'm tempted to put on my profile "I'm into women who love making tautologies. In case you don't know what that is, all tautologies are tautologies" because there seems to be a lot of them.2 -
magnusthenerd wrote: »PlentyofProtein00 wrote: »magnusthenerd wrote: »I have not found it very fruitful. I've used tried various sites off and on for the 7 years now since my wife left. Over that time, I've
* Met up with someone once, have her as FB friend but barely interact with her
* Been messaged by one woman who was a Young Earth Creationist while my profile indicated I'm an atheist. I wouldn't be opposed to someone somewhat religious, but someone that thinks the world is only 6,000 years old is too far apart a worldview from me.
* Been messaged by a woman who wondered if I would be her FWB since her husband is asexual. It would be expected that I would be exclusive to her though. This would also involve me being friends with the husband. Which, I mean, if that's what they want to do, ok. I'm just couldn't be in relationship with no real future and I don't think I could be like, "Oh hey buddy, let me go take care of our girl, then you and me are getting on the Xbox. Cool?"
* Dozen of messages on Plenty of Fish that were just scammers. Some of them using the same woman's set of pictures - like if PoF had any kind fraud prevention, this person would never have an account.
* Talked to one woman who after about 5 lines started talking about how she was going to go get on a plane like she was fishing for me to try to stop her. Pretty sure it was a scam.
* Talked to one woman who was nice to talk to but then just stopped responding 1 week later. We just kind of talked about music and kids, and then radio silence.
* Received on message from a woman asking about getting coffee sometime after quarantine, just for her to ask to go to emailing and get emailed by a Russian, almost certainly scam.
Have you tried other apps besides pof...pof is kind of a blah app. I've had most success on bumble and hinge.
Actually never heard of hinge, thanks. All I ever got out of Bumble was a laugh at finding my older sister's friend's profile and telling her I treated it Baptists in the liquor store: I didn't see her there, she didn't see me.
The first 3 things I described were on OkCupid. The two after PoF were on Tinder. The Russian scam was on Zoosk. I've tried a few others too.
The experience on any site is a bit different for men looking for men versus women looking for men. I'm always surprised how many women are complaining about guys "playing games", "sending **** pics", or "just looking to get laid". I have no interest in any of that.
I guess nearly 40 with two kids who's got interests both in nerdy stuff and being fit isn't high on compatibility. In my area it seems everyone wants someone for kayaking. Or maybe I'm just ugly and bad with fashion.
Imagine my surprise when a girl I was talking to from a dating site sent me a D-pic that another guy sent her! 😂🤣
Still met her, turned out to be pretty cool, and we talk this day still.
It does seem, based on info in female profiles, that most guys on the sites are only interested in pen pals or nude swaps.
Messing with the scammers can be fun, plus the longer you keep them busy the less time they have to prey on the more naive. Kind of a community service.
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I met my fiance on tinder. We fell in love and he proposed within 8 months. I had used the app off and on for a couple of years. Went on some fun dates but never felt a real connection. I also had a few awkward dates. There's so many people/personalities/perspectives/interests that the awkward and sometimes flat out horrific dates are bound to happen. Those unsuccessful dates were worth it though. I learned so much about myself and what I wanted out of a partner and relationship.3
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will_it_go_round_in_circles wrote: »magnusthenerd wrote: »PlentyofProtein00 wrote: »magnusthenerd wrote: »I have not found it very fruitful. I've used tried various sites off and on for the 7 years now since my wife left. Over that time, I've
* Met up with someone once, have her as FB friend but barely interact with her
* Been messaged by one woman who was a Young Earth Creationist while my profile indicated I'm an atheist. I wouldn't be opposed to someone somewhat religious, but someone that thinks the world is only 6,000 years old is too far apart a worldview from me.
* Been messaged by a woman who wondered if I would be her FWB since her husband is asexual. It would be expected that I would be exclusive to her though. This would also involve me being friends with the husband. Which, I mean, if that's what they want to do, ok. I'm just couldn't be in relationship with no real future and I don't think I could be like, "Oh hey buddy, let me go take care of our girl, then you and me are getting on the Xbox. Cool?"
* Dozen of messages on Plenty of Fish that were just scammers. Some of them using the same woman's set of pictures - like if PoF had any kind fraud prevention, this person would never have an account.
* Talked to one woman who after about 5 lines started talking about how she was going to go get on a plane like she was fishing for me to try to stop her. Pretty sure it was a scam.
* Talked to one woman who was nice to talk to but then just stopped responding 1 week later. We just kind of talked about music and kids, and then radio silence.
* Received on message from a woman asking about getting coffee sometime after quarantine, just for her to ask to go to emailing and get emailed by a Russian, almost certainly scam.
Have you tried other apps besides pof...pof is kind of a blah app. I've had most success on bumble and hinge.
Actually never heard of hinge, thanks. All I ever got out of Bumble was a laugh at finding my older sister's friend's profile and telling her I treated it Baptists in the liquor store: I didn't see her there, she didn't see me.
The first 3 things I described were on OkCupid. The two after PoF were on Tinder. The Russian scam was on Zoosk. I've tried a few others too.
The experience on any site is a bit different for men looking for men versus women looking for men. I'm always surprised how many women are complaining about guys "playing games", "sending **** pics", or "just looking to get laid". I have no interest in any of that.
I guess nearly 40 with two kids who's got interests both in nerdy stuff and being fit isn't high on compatibility. In my area it seems everyone wants someone for kayaking. Or maybe I'm just ugly and bad with fashion.
Imagine my surprise when a girl I was talking to from a dating site sent me a D-pic that another guy sent her! 😂🤣
Still met her, turned out to be pretty cool, and we talk this day still.
It does seem, based on info in female profiles, that most guys on the sites are only interested in pen pals or nude swaps.
Messing with the scammers can be fun, plus the longer you keep them busy the less time they have to prey on the more naive. Kind of a community service.
🙊🙊🙊1 -
emailnumber308 wrote: »I met my fiance on tinder. We fell in love and he proposed within 8 months. I had used the app off and on for a couple of years. Went on some fun dates but never felt a real connection. I also had a few awkward dates. There's so many people/personalities/perspectives/interests that the awkward and sometimes flat out horrific dates are bound to happen. Those unsuccessful dates were worth it though. I learned so much about myself and what I wanted out of a partner and relationship.
Definitely learned lots about myself too. One guy specifically, secretly motivated me to get serious about my weight loss 😁2 -
magnusthenerd wrote: »
I don't know, people put in their profile and I feel like I'm without a paddle and just can't go with the flow.PlentyofProtein00 wrote: »magnusthenerd wrote: »PlentyofProtein00 wrote: »magnusthenerd wrote: »I have not found it very fruitful. I've used tried various sites off and on for the 7 years now since my wife left. Over that time, I've
* Met up with someone once, have her as FB friend but barely interact with her
* Been messaged by one woman who was a Young Earth Creationist while my profile indicated I'm an atheist. I wouldn't be opposed to someone somewhat religious, but someone that thinks the world is only 6,000 years old is too far apart a worldview from me.
* Been messaged by a woman who wondered if I would be her FWB since her husband is asexual. It would be expected that I would be exclusive to her though. This would also involve me being friends with the husband. Which, I mean, if that's what they want to do, ok. I'm just couldn't be in relationship with no real future and I don't think I could be like, "Oh hey buddy, let me go take care of our girl, then you and me are getting on the Xbox. Cool?"
* Dozen of messages on Plenty of Fish that were just scammers. Some of them using the same woman's set of pictures - like if PoF had any kind fraud prevention, this person would never have an account.
* Talked to one woman who after about 5 lines started talking about how she was going to go get on a plane like she was fishing for me to try to stop her. Pretty sure it was a scam.
* Talked to one woman who was nice to talk to but then just stopped responding 1 week later. We just kind of talked about music and kids, and then radio silence.
* Received on message from a woman asking about getting coffee sometime after quarantine, just for her to ask to go to emailing and get emailed by a Russian, almost certainly scam.
Have you tried other apps besides pof...pof is kind of a blah app. I've had most success on bumble and hinge.
Actually never heard of hinge, thanks. All I ever got out of Bumble was a laugh at finding my older sister's friend's profile and telling her I treated it Baptists in the liquor store: I didn't see her there, she didn't see me.
The first 3 things I described were on OkCupid. The two after PoF were on Tinder. The Russian scam was on Zoosk. I've tried a few others too.
The experience on any site is a bit different for men looking for men versus women looking for men. I'm always surprised how many women are complaining about guys "playing games", "sending **** pics", or "just looking to get laid". I have no interest in any of that.
I guess nearly 40 with two kids who's got interests both in nerdy stuff and being fit isn't high on compatibility. In my area it seems everyone wants someone for kayaking. Or maybe I'm just ugly and bad with fashion.
I have heard of the issues you've described that men have dealt with. And I'll be honest, if I'm not laughing and vibing with the guy's personality I just move on. Looks are a priority but for me I've come across some very Nice/Kind men...and our humor just wasnt the same...and hey!? What's wrong with kayaking??? 😂
Could be worse. Some people talk about loving sarcasm like it really is something rare. The worst are the people that say they like to have fun - I always want to ask those people who've the met that dislikes fun because I'm interested in how that could work. Or the women who like guys that are attractive. Not traits that are, just they like guys that are attractive.
I'm tempted to put on my profile "I'm into women who love making tautologies. In case you don't know what that is, all tautologies are tautologies" because there seems to be a lot of them.
😂
I always tried to be outlandish. Anyone who can banter with craziness was my kind of person. And I agree, most people who put how funny they are, tend to not be so funny. But I've met a lot of good peeps along the way.0 -
its not so bad i don't think
just be attractive.
don't be unattractive2 -
Online dating is okay but carbon dating is where it’s at5
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Have plenty of horrible stories and I’ve also connected a few times. Recently tho, this whole COVID-19, have drinks during online video chatting stuff is a bit awkward. Looking forward to getting back to somewhat of a normal dating scene... hopefully sooner than later.3
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Both my dds did the online dating thing. One of them lived together for a few years, bought a house, then split up. He was really nice. My other dd is still living with her bf, and they just bought a house, also been at least a few years. They are so good together and he's such a great guy all around. I went to Iceland last fall with both of them and I was able to get to know him better; they are so great together.
But I have to tell you; being a mom to a dd who's exploring the online dating scene is very scary.0 -
Cardeeoh_Nicole wrote: »online dating seems terrifying.
It is!3 -
In college I had one date with a guy who first, gave me his best impression of screamo music. In a restaurant I might add.
He then proceeded to tell me that he'd like to stick his foot and his cellphone in my vagina.
I noped out of there quick.
Another one wasnt horrible but it was odd. but I met a guy who told me on our second date that he was going to marry me someday. Mind you, I was in the middle of a nasty divorce and commitment was the last thing I wanted so that put me off. He won me over though. That was almost 5 years ago and we're engaged. I dont really care to be married again, but whatever happens, happens.0 -
I'm a man and I'm 40 years old. I'm single and I was always surprised that most often women write that men on dating sites are obsessed with sex and it is impossible to find a good man there. I can say the opposite. All the women I met on dating sites, were crazy. After 1 date, they thought I should marry them! If we spent 1 evening together, it does not mean that I love you for the rest of my life. And please, it's unnecessary to send me the breakup songs from http://breakupangels.com/best-breakup-songs/!0
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JosephSlaterk13 wrote: »I'm a man and I'm 40 years old. I'm single and I was always surprised that most often women write that men on dating sites are obsessed with sex and it is impossible to find a good man there. I can say the opposite. All the women I met on dating sites, were crazy. After 1 date, they thought I should marry them! If we spent 1 evening together, it does not mean that I love you for the rest of my life.
Absolutely. Totally crazy to want a relationship. Usually I don't even have to meet. I like to know who I am meeting before I meet them. One encounter the man asked what method of birth control I use before he'd even asked about my likes, dislikes, beliefs, family. Real keeper that. Needless to say, I never met him.2 -
A bit more honesty (with themselves and others) from both sides would make the process more enjoyable.
If just looking to rail... do it on an app that is specific to that - there are plenty out there and can be found with the dating apps in any app store. Or be really blatant about it in a profile on a dating app. Don't waste time and attention on people with different intentions. Reduces the amount of miscommunication and mismatched expectations.
If focused on developing a relationship... don't bother interacting with, or meeting, someone that is blatant about only wanting to rail. Don't allow those with different intentions to distract from the goal. Reduces the frustration on both sides.1
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