OK, let's talk
Replies
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So glad you are moderating discussions. This is a fantastic site, and has made a HUGE difference in my getting healthy. I have noticed lately that there are some discussions that get a little carried away, either with degrading comments, hurtful responses, a little too much sex and the profile pictures are getting too racey for general audiences. Keep up the great work Mike!! You are doing an amazing thing for many people out there!!! :bigsmile:0
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You know what Mike... I am going to derail this thread full of awesome and just say...
THANK YOU! Thank you for creating this website! Thanks to this website I have been able to lose over 19lbs and I can call myself fat on the forums without having people judging me (That sounded like an infomercial, eh /shrug). Funfackingtastic!!!0 -
Thank you for this site, and this! I don't know any other website as big as MFP is growing to that would still get a "face to face" (well as face to face as you can online LOL), like this. It is great that you take the time out of your day to clear the air and set things right.0
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Thanks for the time you are putting in to make this site a place where we all want to be.0
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We've seen members trying to push the limits of our sexual content rules, making thinly veiled sexual references and always trying to push the line
Guilty as charged...sorry...i need to focus more on weight loss. I do love the idea of groups for like minede people!!!. Great site, great work. Keep it up!!! (not a thinly veiled attempt....)
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Thank you for this talk. I do have to say the members pod this site have responsibility in how it runs too. Too many times an opinion that is slightly different than the poster gets accusations of bullying. The adults on this site need to act as such and stop.getting so upset at the tiniest things. Mods or yourself shouldn't have to be babysitters for the while group.0
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Groups is a step forward...like it. Thanks for posting this Mike.
We are all supposed to be adults on here...and frankly whether people like it or not..if you provide a forum for people to interact with each other...people will interact. And crap happens.
Self moderating groups is a fantastic idea. Lots of people read topics in the forum that are clearly not about weight loss. They go and read it anyway "knowing full well" they are going to be offended and then report it. That's the nature of a little pandering to political correctness.
I love the site...BUT i also love my friends and if my friends leave because the part of the site they enjoyed has changed dramatically...then I started wondering where it stops.
Thanks for the explanation.0 -
Hey, just an idea. How about making one of those pages that you have to read with the rules and then CLICK that you agree? Most sites do this and then you can be more assured folks KNOW there are rules.
Perfect idea
I would add that in the formation/joining of future groups this be mandatory for every one you join. Not just one time.0 -
I'm not a computer wiz at all or anything, and I realize that mods don't have the time to inbox everyone every time they delete a thread, but would be nice if there was some sort of automatic way for them to message everyone on a thread with a brief (like one sentence) explanation of why a thread got deleted.
I was commenting in a thread the other day about BMR rates and it got vanished, for reasons I cannot begin to fathom. Nothing about politics, race, religion, sex. Lots of disagreement going on, but no personal attacks that I can remember.
If we were notified why it got deleted (e.g. too many descriptions of purple elephants) and the rationale was legitimate, I think we'd probably correct our behavior.0 -
Awesome site!!! great job!!!!!!0
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Firstly, thank you so much for your great explanation and actually caring enough to share your thoughts. I think it'll be beneficial for everyone to be able to read it and understand what's been happening and what all you have to do to keep this site running well. Secondly, a big thank you for making this site and allowing all of us to use it for free. I know it's helped me with my weight loss goals so far and I hope it will continue to do so well into the future.
Showing the rules and whatnot in a way where people can't ignore them or turn a blind eye to them is definitely a great idea. Thank you once again 0 -
Groups is a step forward...like it. Thanks for posting this Mike.
We are all supposed to be adults on here...and frankly whether people like it or not..if you provide a forum for people to interact with each other...people will interact. And crap happens.
Self moderating groups is a fantastic idea. Lots of people read topics in the forum that are clearly not about weight loss. They go and read it anyway "knowing full well" they are going to be offended and then report it. That's the nature of a little pandering to political correctness.
I love the site...BUT i also love my friends and if my friends leave because the part of the site they enjoyed has changed dramatically...then I started wondering where it stops.
Thanks for the explanation.
Couldn't have said it better.0 -
I think the mods take a lot of crap for what they do, but they do a good job. People just forget that this site is free. Besides, it is better than many paid sites that I have seen. Thank you for this site and all of your hard work.
You might consider having a short bulleted list of reminders of the rules when someone posts on a forum. Maybe just right above box to post the reply that could remind MFP users what the rules are. I have seen sites that have done this on their forums and it makes you think twice before you respond. Just a thought.0 -
I think the groups with self-moderators are good idea. I don't get too easily offended... and I think it is sad that people cannot have open discussions on any topic.
You could also offer separate 'chit chat' forums with 'ratings' such as PG-17, G, etc. This way the parents that are in the living room with their kids are responsible for selecting a G rated forum.
I have never seen the rules - but that may be just an oversight on my part. They are probably at the top of the threads.
Perhaps there could be a forum rules page that must be agreed to with initial sign-up or prior to forum posting.
Thank you for creating this site! As I have posted somewhere before... this time next year (when I have lost weight equivalent to the size of the average teenager) if I could find you I would kiss you square on the mouth! :bigsmile: Not in a sick way. 0 -
First off .. Nice to meet you Mike.
And B .. Personally, I think this is a great site .. A wonderful gathering of support and motivation for a group of people with a common interest. I appreciate being able to be part of it.
And 3: .. I have no idea what all the hulabalooooo is about. Don't much care. This kind of thing happens in every forum. Some people don't like to be told what they can and can not do...even when it comes to conduct. They think THAT is losing their right to free speech .. and become very offended when rules are enforced. I for one, understand trying to keep the peace is a thankless job.
Being argumentative, confrontational or abusive will never be construed as 'free speech' I don't care WHERE you are .. Debating a subject, or having a difference of opinion is not the same thing...and can still be done with some level of respect.
Members Be Warned:
If you ask for an open forum opinion .. ya better be emotionally prepared for what comes next ..because .. sometimes it's not what ya wanna hear. Soooo, Suck it up buttercup!0 -
We've seen members trying to push the limits of our sexual content rules, making thinly veiled sexual references and always trying to push the line
Guilty as charged...sorry...i need to focus more on weight loss. I do love the idea of groups for like minede people!!!. Great site, great work. Keep it up!!! (not a thinly veiled attempt....)
you mean like a "cool kids" place to go? If so, I want in there.0 -
Or a block button, block this user....etc. so that pm, forum posts and blogs including that user wouldn't be visible.You know what else you should incorporate, honesty, an ignore button.
Please. Ignore button!
We're definitely looking at an ignore button. Need to explore the technical issues around it but it's on our to-do list.0 -
I love MFP and spend a LOT of time here. I also love my friends as family!! I think the idea of groups is a great idea!
Thanks, Mike, in so many ways!!!! 0 -
Hey Mike,
First, thankyou for the site, and thankyou mods for giving up their time. This site is an incredible tool that's helping to change many people's lives.
I appreciate that you try to keep non-controversial topics off the agenda, such as politics, because of the flaming that comes from it, and I appreciate that the groups option will be coming soon so that a wider range of topics can be discussed by those who wish to.
The thing that I do still take issue with, however, is:In the main forums, the rules are designed to try to keep content and posts in a range where we think almost everyone will be comfortable. This way, the forums can help the most people possible
^ with regards to the blanket ban on talk of sexuality. By banning talk of LGBTQ people so that others can feel 'comfortable' is, purposefully or not, active discrimination. I do appreciate your reasoning behind the rule, honestly I do - no one likes to be bullied because of their sexual identity, and I know it makes the mods' lives easier. However, by banning open talk of LGBTQ in order to make some people feel more 'comfortable' is bowing down to homophobia and punishing the wrong group of people.
As I said, I understand your reasoning, but I really think that this rule is the wrong way to go about things.
(Sorry I'm sounding like a broken record lately, it just gets my goat)
Anywho, keep up the rest of the good work.
So I just want to be clear on this - we 100% want to ensure that LGBTQ members can find ALL of the support they need on MFP.
Also to be clear - we 100% want to ensure that Christians and other religions can find ALL of the support they need on MFP.
We actually very much want to eliminate this rule entirely. In fact, we used to not have this rule at all. But when we didn't have the rule in place, unfortunately, these types of topics would ALWAYS attract a troll who would start posting absolutely horrible remarks. We'd do our best to moderate them, but because we didn't have a lot of resources available, there would be a lot of times where we wouldn't be able to moderate the topic until it was too late. Feelings would already be hurt, and viscious insults would be thrown. By the time we were notified of the topic, we'd just have to delete it because it had become so full of inappropriate posts. We simply didnt have enough mods so that someone could step in early enough to prevent this from happening.
Now, Groups will definitely help. They will be specifically designed to accomodate groups like an LGBTQ support group, and our hope is that because they will be self-moderated, the groups will have enough resources to ensure that any bad behavior is dealt with promptly. But after Groups are available, we'd also like to be able to eliminate this rule on the main forums. We're trying to find ways to do that so that we can allow those topics to be discussed while still ensuring that members won't be harassed and that mods won't be overworked.
I don't have all the answers yet, but that's definitely our goal and what we're working towards. After groups are available, feel free to PM me and let me know if they meet your needs.0 -
Moderating cannot be an easy task. Thank you and to the others who volunteer their time to do this. Groups for like minded people will be good, if you are able to achieve that. I think it's honorable that you've taken some blame, but don't take all of the blame. There are people intentionally sabotaging discussions. I suspect that the trolls will always try to "take over" topics; that's the part they enjoy most. I also think it's great that you've refrained from banning anyone. However, that may be what needs to happen if all of your attempts to keep this site positive supportive fail because of a few. Thank you for the site and for all you do. I realize it's free, but I would pay to stay on here for all of the positive features of it.0
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I'm not a computer wiz at all or anything, and I realize that mods don't have the time to inbox everyone every time they delete a thread, but would be nice if there was some sort of automatic way for them to message everyone on a thread with a brief (like one sentence) explanation of why a thread got deleted.
I was commenting in a thread the other day about BMR rates and it got vanished, for reasons I cannot begin to fathom. Nothing about politics, race, religion, sex. Lots of disagreement going on, but no personal attacks that I can remember.
If we were notified why it got deleted (e.g. too many descriptions of purple elephants) and the rationale was legitimate, I think we'd probably correct our behavior.
I think something like this would be good. Maybe even if they couldn't be sent a specific reason, maybe just an automated "[insert thread name] has been deleted for breaking forum rules, if you have a question to why, reply to this message. Please allow 24-48 hours for a reply".
That way the people who really want to know can ask and the moderator can get back to them when they have time, but other people who...say...don't really care and just move on, the moderator doesn't have to worry about writing them a specific answer.0 -
Mike,
Just as the others have stated, I am grateful for this site. I dont know if I would have been as dedicated to the weight loss process without it. With that being said, I think things have gotten out of hand the last few weeks but by both sides of the "sex chat" isle. I am a firm believer that if you don't like something, you have the freedom to not partake. I think complaing about others partaking in sexual conversations but seeking them out is like saying you hate alcohol but show up at a bar and complain that beer is being served. I hardly ever take part in the community portion, but when I do, if i see a title and feel offended by it, I don't enter it. I don't log on and then act offended. I hope you can see how some became upset when it appeared that you were reprimanding some for "stalking"and not the others. I hope your clarrification clears the air.
Just my two cents
Dave0 -
I am a volunteer mod on a small political site and yes,it is a thankless "job" to say the least.
What seems to work best is a policy of when in doubt do nothing and by that I mean if there is a complaint raised by a member or an issue any moderator sees and questions if appropriate then we all get together and unless obvious no action is taken although it will be monitored.
The person filing the report is then notified of this and why,what is fun and innocent to one may be terribly offensive to another so rational judgment based on accepted social standards should apply.
Everyone is responsible for their own homes and computer usage.
What seems to me,IMO only,to have caused things things here to have become such a train wreck is no level of communication over various issues at there inception.
It gave an appearance of trying to sweep some unpleasant events under the rug and whether correct or not once the frustration starts it is like a festering wound that will not go away and suddenly starts to spread well beyond the initial cause.
I have been around various forums over several years and this one is no different then any other,you have human nature at play and even though in a perfect world some things should be easy the reality is they just aren`t.
My only advice or input would be a lot better level of communication as to why actions are taken,they don`t have to be heavy handed or appear to be disciplinary but a simple explanation.
I do understand that there are times when a thread for obvious reasons should just be thrown away,I would bet 95% of membership here would always agree even if they personally enjoyed it.
In short I have rarely seen a problem such has crept up in the last week get better by trying to just ignore it and hope it goes away.
This is a good idea Mike and hope if something starts to snowball again the same thing happens at a much sooner place.
Thanks for the opportunity to express this without fear of reprisal.
Hope everyone will speak their mind civilly and respectfully while being honest about their opinions.0 -
Thanks Mike for the site and thanks for the explanation.0
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I'm the creator of MyFitnessPal. I'm the one that has been moderating a lot of the topics today. I think there have been a lot of misperceptions
"misperceptions"? Is that a word?0 -
Thanks for all you do! I have been very successful with my weightloss since finding MFP. First I just used it as an app on my phone and then I found the online forums.......and made friends, and I don't think that I would be as successful without the support network I have formed.
That being said...yes, I have seen some things on the boards that have been in bad taste - I have seen some stuff that has broken the rules and tested the rules - you know what I do???? I leave the topic.
In the chit/chat and fun forum, I know there is usually going to be something considered to some as "bad taste" I enter at my own risk.
I just think that there are some people that need to grow up around here and quit clicking "report post" to make them feel like they have power or something.
If you don't like it, move on.0 -
I'm not a computer wiz at all or anything, and I realize that mods don't have the time to inbox everyone every time they delete a thread, but would be nice if there was some sort of automatic way for them to message everyone on a thread with a brief (like one sentence) explanation of why a thread got deleted.
I was commenting in a thread the other day about BMR rates and it got vanished, for reasons I cannot begin to fathom. Nothing about politics, race, religion, sex. Lots of disagreement going on, but no personal attacks that I can remember.
If we were notified why it got deleted (e.g. too many descriptions of purple elephants) and the rationale was legitimate, I think we'd probably correct our behavior.
We definitely would like to notify people as much as possible. But as you probably know, the boards are incredibly busy. Sometimes, there is only one moderator online, and there are 50 abuse reports to look at. That's fairly common.
We need to get more moderators on board, and we're working on that. We also have hired Steven, and he'll be able to dedicate a lot more time to the forums than any MFP staff member has in the past. The goal is definitely to try to provide as much information as possible, but it's not always feasible to notify everyone.
We hear your feedback though and we'll work to improve it.0 -
Mike,
Thank you for posting this. I have not been on to read many of the posts this week and by the time I do log in, they have been removed. I appreciate you taking the time to explain what has been going on because you are right, there are rumors flying. It is unfortunate that some adults cannot contain their negative comments and trouble causing actions. Thank you for creating MFP and for making it FREE! I came here from another site and love this one so much more!0 -
I think things have gotten out of hand the last few weeks but by both sides of the "sex chat" isle. I am a firm believer that if you don't like something, you have the freedom to not partake. I think complaing about others partaking in sexual conversations but seeking them out is like saying you hate alcohol but show up at a bar and complain that beer is being served
^^that^^0 -
Thank you for posting this and opening the lines of communication. I really have nothing constructive to add, other than to say that the site is a very useful weight loss tool and I appreciate it.
As for the rest, I choose not to comment.0
This discussion has been closed.
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