At Goal & Successfully Maintaining. So Why Am I Doing This All Over Again?

NSV!!!!

BL was in such a rush, he forgot to weigh in before he left, but he did proudly show me he was wearing some jeans he hasn’t gotten into for a while. He preened when I told him,
”Those are baggy!”

What’s an NSV?

NSV = Non Scale Victory

Sometimes, when your weight’s not moving like you think it should, and you’re frustrated as all get out, other changes remind you that progress is still happening. Those are the NSVs.

Clothes getting looser, moving down a belt buckle hole, even shoes fitting looser.

The NSV thread is hands down the best thread on MFP. I’ve read every single post. When I was feeling low, it was great to celebrate and identify with other users’ NSVs. I can’t tell you how many times this thread had kept me motivated and hanging in there when I seriously felt like quitting

https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/1275030/whats-your-most-recent-nsv/p1

I just posted this on another thread and thought I’d share it here. The other OP was concerned because she and her husband have different calorie requirements. Anyway, FWIW, this is how we are coping with a large calorie difference in our household.

I’ve been doing MFP for three years and have been in maintenance for about one. I’m highly active.

My husband started four or five weeks ago and is probably between sedentary and mildly active.

I get about 700 more calories per day than he does. We’re both retired, so spend a lot of time in the house together.

I make a large batch of pancakes for breakfast, enough to eat for two or three days. He simply portions out fewer than me. I like low fat Greek cream cheese and zero cal syrup on mine. He just does the syrup.

Lunch, he’s a deli meat and chips kind of guy, and makes his own reasonable calorie lunch. I generally make massive salads with a ton of meat on the top. I’ve offered, but he side-eyes me and says he can’t even imagine eating something that large without literally busting a gut. There’s no “food jealousy” over my salad. He’s totally disinterested.

I do a lot of snacking in the afternoon when he isn’t around, so it won’t bother or tempt him.

If I think he’s running low (after seeing what he had for lunch and knowing what my dinner plan is), I might offer him his favorite chocolate smoothie. I give him half, and then go back and add an ingredient or two he doesn’t care for in the other half for myself. He’s happy, I’m happy.

Dinner is the same for both of us, although I will generally have a much larger portion of meat than him, and a larger side salad.

If for some reason I’m not home to make dinner for him, it’s deli sandwich again, or a trip to Cookout for the under 600 calorie “Cookout Tray” special.

Dessert is usually the same for both of us, although again, my serving will usually be larger than his unless he has a lot of calories left over.

So for us, it works pretty well eating the same foods, but just adjusting portions to our needs, and doing the heavy snacking either out of his sight, or having it be something he’s totally disinterested in (he’d rather lick the floor than have cottage cheese and fruit. His loss. More for me. )

I struggled with it the first few weeks because I felt bad for him, and because I was used to giving him the “man’s share”, but I’ve come to terms with it, and he’s been awfully good about it himself. He’s very invested in losing some weight.

What I thought might turn into a push me pull you has actually worked out really well. I guess we’re “adulting” our way through this. 😉

👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻 Just checked BL’s food diary on the sly. He’s doing very very well on his trip. Looks like he’s really trying to choose nutritious choices while eating on the fly- with other guys. Small fries, green beans, eggs, grits, roast beef. Poor guy. One corn muffin. I almost feel sorry for him. My BL loves him some cornbread.

Me? I celebrated some quality Me Time with a package of chocolate chip cookie dough. Old Me rears her head occasionally, and ever since I accidentally discovered dough with a hit of ground salt…… “do not eat raw dough” warnings not withstanding……

It’s all gone now. *burp*

Back to some nutritious choices myself, but it was fun derailing for a couple of days. Derailing is fine when it’s a conscious choice and you’ve built up enough habits that “getting back on the wagon” is a (dare I say it?) piece of cake versus a battle of will.

Anyway, this new dog will walk it off me in a matter of no time. I don’t understand how a dog with six inch legs can pound pavement for miles a day, and go berserk with joy at the thought of yet another walk.

That’s how WE should be about exercise.

BL is back from his reenactment week. He made a real effort to continue logging and to make good choices.

He even looks smaller than when he left.

So why haven’t I nagged him to climb up on the scale?

1.) salty, carby fast foods need a few days to flush. Even with the best available choices, either can cause weight to temporarily appear higher

2.) a very stressful and long drive home (stress compounded by a convertible top that refused to go back up and impending rain). Stress and travel can both lead to temporary water weight gain

3.) Unfamiliar activity. These bad boys not only had to prep a large park for thousands of spectators and reinactors, they had 33 cannons (yep, you read that right) to move - and fire- during reenactment battles. Cannons are not feathers, shall we say. So DOMs (temporary muscle soreness and fatigue) may be in play, too. Your very intelligent body retains water and sends to sore spots for healing.

4.) Fatigue and lack of sleep can also cause temporary water gain. BL is a homebody and doesn’t sleep well without a cat stretched acrost his legs.

We’ll give it a few days and then get him to weigh in.

BL weighed in this morning and is all *kitten*-a-hoop that he’s down 4 more, for a total of 15 pounds. That’s roughly a pound and a half a week thus far.

“But I ate all fast food and camp food last week. I didn’t think I’d be down this week.”

Yes, but you did it mindfully, made good choices, and kept track. See how that works, folks? 👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻

One of our daughters will be very pleased when we update her. Our other gets angry and hostile and doesn’t want to hear about it. Neither one has a weight issue, but talk of weight “triggers” that one. (Talk of anything pretty much triggers her, unfortunately. And btw, don’t use the word “trigger”because that triggers her. And to think, I never heard of the word til she sprung it on me. 🙄)

I think of her as keeping us in mental aspic. She sees us very seldom, living on the other side of the country, and doesn’t want her parents to change from what’s in her memory. She finds it very distressing that we have lives outside of her box for some reason. I guess that’s her comfort zone and I get it. And it can be an unholy shock to see someone who was obese last time you saw them, and isn’t any more. I’m just sorta sad she can’t celebrate our better health with us.

There’s some fascinating stories on MFP about how friends, family, others have reacted to users’ weight loss.

And how users themselves have reacted to that reaction.

https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10735982/things-people-say-when-you-lose-weight/p1

BL dragged out a sweatshirt. “Got a chill”, he said apologetically. “Can’t seem to shake it.”

And so it begins. The cold!!! The bone numbing cold! Also known as WLAF. Weight Loss *kitten* Freeze.

Yes. It’s a real thing.

That sensation, from the inside out, that you will never, ever be warm enough again. That, while you’ve slimmed down, the world will never notice because of the extra layers you’re piling on. When socks become your best friend. When you seriously consider wearing gloves to bed. When you catch your SO jealously eyeing your fleece bathrobe.

Fire up the kettle for some hot tea. This may be with you for a few seasons, and still crop up unexpectedly later on.

Get in the habit of carrying a sweater to restaurants, meetings etc.

Stock up on bubble bath for those nights only a hot bath will save you.

The best supposition ‘round these parts is that you’ve lost a layer of insulation. Your metabolism has changed. Something’s up. Many people here report experiencing WLAF.

On the NSV side, it’s proof you’re progressing. And maybe all those shivers burn calories?

Let’s go OT and talk about MFP friends for a minute..

I’m getting a lot of friend requests, presumably because of this thread. (Which I sincerely appreciate y’all reading, since BL refuses to.)

Friends can be great. They can be motivating. Some are wonderful at pulling you along for the ride. Some are breathtakingly entertaining, but I’m only “calling it as I see it”, (and you know who you are).

Friends can be mindnumbing. Friends can be rather anonymously vaguely threatening, particularly to a female. Sorry, I’m old school and besides, I listen to true crime podcasts on my many walks. Those things will make you pretty darn paranoid.

Bad things about friend: pornbots trying to share foreign URLs with you. Users harvesting friends for various reasons- and this applies to gals as well as guys. In this current world, some use MFP as Tinder-Lite. Others are using it to scam you with cyber-currency ripoffs, lonely hearts scams, or worse, to get you to provide email address so they can take you offline. KNOW who you’re giving your email address to.

Friends (again guys and gals) showing sooo much skin in their feeds. Again, I’m a different generation. There’s some users I just grit my teeth and like Playboy readers of old, I read their posts and ignore the photos, because young flaunters sometimes have great info to share, and I know they’re legit users, and am happy for their success.

Want to make friends?

#1 complaint here on the boards: No profile pic. Put in a profile pic so folks know who they’re dealing with. Even if it’s a picture of your insane dog or crazy cat, it shows intent and that you’re (probably) not a bot.

#2 complaint: porny profile pic. I know you’re proud of your pecs, your killer thighs, or your awesome cleavage, but if you really want help and motivation, some potential friends (me) are probably going to assume something else. Btw @AnnPT77 and @sijomial get passes for their profile pics. I find good biceps and shoulders very motivating, plus you can easily search their posting history to see that they’re legit and involved.

#3 complaint : you haven’t taken the time to fill out your profile page. Or if you have, it includes your porn link. Tell us a little about yourself.

#4 your feed is private. Ummmmm you want to be friends yet everything about you is locked up so I can’t see? Honey, that creeps me TF out. I get it that you’re overweight (been there, 100 pounds worth so I have street cred) and don’t want to share certain things but go into your privacy settings and unblock a few crumbs.

red flags:
* profile pic
* new account with a lot of numbers or “MFP” as part of the user ID
*old ID with no activity until the past couple weeks and that’s only X number of days logged in and suddenly harvesting friends
*accounts a couple weeks old with 0 pounds lost. Sure, we all had to start somewhere, or are restarting, but most accounts will have small fluctuations within the first weeks of enthusiasm , as well as indications of diary closed, or exercises accomplished. I often find many of the other red flags associated with 0 pounds lost.
* accounts that send you generic PMs like hey, good morning, or hello dear, especially if they do it several times. Those are copy and paste messages to engage you before hitting you with whatever scam they’re involved in.

I’ve covered everything I can think of. Your suggestions?