What nobody tells you about losing weight

PAPYRUS3 wrote: »

Not only do you have to change all your clothing - but accessories too. What I use to 'be able' to wear now is overwhelming to my frame/face. Like earring size - bags/purses.

I just learned this when I got new specs. For years, I avoided any type of round eye wear since on my fat face, the effect was always very Ralphie from 'A Christmas Story.' So naturally, when choosing new frames, I immediately went to my old standby: large angular rectangles with thick bold lines. What a surprise to find that those were now overwhelming and I could rock small translucent roundish frames. Oh, and I have cheekbones! Who knew?!

That when you lose a significant amount then regain say 10-16 lbs you really do notice how uncomfortable your body feels.

I definitely have noticed a confidence boost after a significant weight loss of about 100 or so pounds, but I don't know if my self esteem has caught up yet! While weight loss has been very beneficial for me and my personal health, I think it has been a hard adjustment for myself with my partner.

angelexperiment wrote: »

That when you lose a significant amount then regain say 10-16 lbs you really do notice how uncomfortable your body feels.

Yes, I gradually gained back 13 pounds over the last 18 months. It felt terrible - a heavy and bloated feeling. I've recently decided to lose it and am down a couple of pounds. But I've found I can't even mention that I'm cutting back on food/drink to friends & acquaintances because of:

anna_nintey3 wrote: »

That people will still voice their opinion no matter what weight you are

Everybody wants to tell me "you still look great" which is nice I guess, but sometimes I feel like it's gaslighting. So I'm going to quietly lose the last 10 pounds.

Elske224 wrote: »

Also I have noticed with the weight loss I have become more self conscious about my appearance (hair and make up are defo more on point than before)!

I have noticed this also (working from home didn't help either). I would go out without make up and not much thought to what I was wearing. Was it clean and wrinkle free? Good enough. But now I am putting on a little makeup and making sure my clothes fit reasonably well. I used to wear clothes that were a little too big thinking they hid my fat better but I won't wear baggy clothes anymore even though I've still got a long way to go.

I have come full circle with clothes.

When I was obese it was 'is it clean and wrinkle free' + too big because I thought it hid my fat.

When I was starting to see results, finally, I became really anti-'this is a tent'/wearing oversized things because I was proud and also because I COULD -- and because I felt like the bagger clothes made me look fatter.

I am at goal now and back to 'doesn't fall off my butt' and oversized sweatshirts because they're comfortable and warm.

I'm definitely less self-conscious and I definitely also bother more with my hair/makeup more often, though, just because it somehow feels more 'worth it' than it did when I was heavier.

I will say, though, that the unfortunate thing I learned along the way re: clothes: When you're fat, big clothes don't hide it; you still look fat. When you're NOT fat, big clothes don't make you look fat. Still more or less flattering things, but baggy clothes don't make you look fat OR hide it. It's a psychological comfort thing.

I never considered myself a "shopper." I had then got down to 122 in 2010. I had to get some clothes that fit of course. And because everything I tried on was too big and I kept having to go to smaller sizes(which was totally the opposite of what I was used to before, having to go to bigger sizes) I became a shopper and still have a walk in closet full of the small sizes. Unfortunately after 5 years of keeping it off and getting lazy, I went right back to my previous highest weight. And became a un-shopper again.

Now with losing (still 50+ to my goal AGAIN) and better management of my diet I intend to go back to shopping. This time in my closet! There is an endorphin sort of boost to getting into smaller sizes, than what you think you are. TJMaxx loved me in those days! Spent a ton!

justanotherloser007 wrote: »

springlering62 wrote: »

For example, I can wear a pants size five or six sizes smaller than the measuring tape would allow.

I think I am having this problem, I measured my hips for underwear - bought what I thought was the correct size and it was too big... I don't understand? What is causing this oddness?

It’s the extra skin. You can push it in, pull it sideways, roll it up like a Swiss Roll. It has no definitive shape.

I was punching down some bread dough yesterday. It’s like dough that’s risen. It’s all light and fluffy and volume, but when you press on it, it clumps down to nothing.

It fools the measuring tape.

Fools the eye.

Mindkittens with your brain, too.

buddharivet wrote: »

JustRamona wrote: »

buddharivet wrote: »

ShatteredLady wrote: »

Ara_celie wrote: »

I've lost 28 lbs and feel amazing..but I HATE that I still look at myself in the mirror and see myself before losing the 28 lbs. Its frustrating and I get mad at myself for it.

I have this exact problem. And it's because self image is inside, not outside. I am in therapy and often speak about my weight loss (258lbs so far LOST) and I still try ordering clothing in the size I had been before. Because to me, I am still the same.
Since I haven't had any skin removal surgery (I still need to lose another 100 lbs...) - the skin takes up more room in the arms of my clothing than my waist and chest, so I must either choose to wear (unsightly) tank tops- or extra large shirts to hold the skin flaps. I feel like a monster and don't know when or if I will ever feel good about myself.

Some days are better than others and I see the weight loss in a different light. But most days (because of depression and anxiety) I end up still feeling just as I had before.

You WILL eventually feel good about yourself! The fact that you have achieved over 2/3rd’s of your intended weight loss shows that you have the strength to make it through. I started with less weight to lose than you have (only 275 pounds to my goal weight), but probably took a lot longer losing it than you have (12 years). I have had a huge roll of skin on my abdomen for most of the 12 years, and it wasn’t until I have gotten within 20 pounds of being ready for skin removal surgery that it’s gotten “thin” enough that I’m willing to wear jeans, because they hold it in. It was my constant, waddling companion for over a decade and I thought I would never get rid of it. But finally, sometime around the end of January, it will be gone. AND the skin on my arms too! Your time will come. Patience and persistence will get you through. Never give up.

I am not where I want to be, but can I ask how much the surgery will cost?

@JustRamona

In my case, I have Anthem Blue Cross insurance, and they will pay for the abdominal surgery if you have lost 100 pounds or more, are having rashes or sores, and have either 1) been a stable weight for 1 year if you had weight loss surgery, or 2) lost your weight without weight loss surgery over a slower period of time, therefore showing that you will keep it off. They will also pay for arms if you are having sores because of the excess skin. I’m not, so I’m paying out of pocket for my arms, and I have to pay for Everything (facility time, anesthesiologist, surgeon fee), even though I’m having them done during the same surgery session. They estimated 2 1/2 hours for my arms, which, in the San Francisco Bay Area, where everything is expensive, is going to cost me just under $7,000.

Thanks for saying this! I'd been wondering and since I have Anthem Blue Cross, that's what I needed to know. It looks like my arms will deflate by themselves, but after three nine-pound babies in my twenties, I have doubts about my front billows.