WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR NOVEMBER 2021
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Evening ladies
Woof... long day.. but ol Allie kept busy.. i just feel bad for Alfie as he was by himself most of the day.. i ran to Costco and Walmart this morning,and like I said Costco as it was the grand opening opened at 8 rather than 10,so it was a mad house.. but i handled it well..
Theni came home for about 45 minutes and got most of the leaves out of my patio,i used my blower but finally had to resort to the rake.. then went up to the school to pick up Carmine. To busy chatting with friends not watching for me so i had to get out of the car and walk up to where they were and wave him down sheesh... and he plugged into his phone with headphones on and basically ignored me.
I tried asking a few questions saying this is all new to me and if I have to introduce you to people how do i do that should i just say this is my grandchild Carmine.. and he said yes.. and i changed my contact in the phone to that and showed him so im not a total.yutz.. and got him McDonald's on the way home..so grandma isnt so bad..4 -
Beth – I hope your mom gets to see your dad. I’m sure that will make the both feel better. And woo hoo for your son. That’s awesome. I’d return the shirt and say that there was false advertising.
Karen VA – I remember FIL saying that if you need to go to the hospital, go in an ambulance. Vince and I went to the ER one time a while ago and we sat there for about 8 hours while everyone who came in an ambulance got taken care of before us, regardless of the fact that we were there first. Even for a copperhead bite, next time go in an ambulance. Even if you really don’t need it, use it. We learned the hard way.
M – best of thoughts for your family. How scary for you!
I think I may be coming down with a cold. But I go for my prolia tomorrow and then Thurs. for my physical. I think I’ll just tell them (if they ask) that my voice is raspy and my nose is running because of my sinuses. I really don’t want to cancel the MD appt, especially since I know it isn’t COVID. I'm going to have some tea with honey right now.
Michele NC2 -
So my middle sister posted on FB:
"Ok everyone. I have fibro, chronic fatigue syndrome, and Peripheral Neuropathy. Really bad. For 3 months, Cant hardly walk, can't use my hands to open anything (thank you family). Been to the drs, er, etc. Feet, legs buttocks, arms, and especially hands are Super cold, needles n pins all the time. Cant hardly eat..
On super vits n minerals. Pain so bad... Please send me prayers if you can. Love you all."
I am mourning because 99% of her ailments are self inflicted. Her peripheral neuropathy is caused by her excessive drinking. Her iron deficiency is because she doesn't have access to cooking her own food. I'm perplexed at how she's handling things, by seeking outwardly for guidance. After years and years of drug use, alcohol and smoking, her body is screaming. Instead of fixing the root problem, her doctors just prescribe more meds. I feel guilty because I don't feel much empathy.
Rebecca
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Rebecca, What they say in Al-Anon about the alcoholic is that you didn't cause it, you can't fix it and and you can't control it. Put your emotional energy into someone who you can help (like your hubby, sons, granddaughter, pen pals, us, for example).5
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The ISLAND Project is the world's largest dementia prevention study.
The Island Study Linking Ageing and Neurodegenerative Disease (ISLAND) Project will involve a range of studies that relate to understanding who is at most risk of dementia and how we can self-manage risk behaviours to build resilience to dementia.
https://island.mooc.utas.edu.au/
This is from their most recent newsletter:
https://island.mooc.utas.edu.au/page/33/newsletters
I have signed up for the study and have also taken the Understanding Brain Injury course. If I can fit it into my schedule, I may take the Dementia courses next year.
Machka in Oz3 -
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Rebecca, What they say in Al-Anon about the alcoholic is that you didn't cause it, you can't fix it and and you can't control it. Put your emotional energy into someone who you can help (like your hubby, sons, granddaughter, pen pals, us, for example).
Yep, it was interesting I was thinking "wow I wish I could vent to my elder sister about this", then she rang me up.💖👍. I was like, " did your sisterly spidey senses go off and you knew you needed to call me"? Yes I most definitely will put my energies into other avenues.💖.
Hugs
Rebecca
Whidbey
Wa
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dlfk202000 wrote: »got back in town just in time to pick up my daycare girl. Unloaded the car after I picked her up, stopped and played at the park with her friend(her friend wasn't there last week because she was sick, before that it rained on the days we usually would see her).
Had a nice but unproductive weekend with mom. That was kind of nice. She was tired after we did food program at church Saturday because she was up at 4 AM- she napped with the tv on-(loud and a CSI marathon-she only seems to watch ION TV channel- CSI, Criminal Minds, which was on all yesterday, Friday was Hawaii 5-0)
I met the guy that lives in his motor home on her property- he is getting a bit too comfortable being there, comes on in the house, sits down and stays there for a few hours- usually coming in at meal time. Didn't get the hint to go back to his place when she was falling asleep. That is just rude and a bit creapy to me.
Yesterday I took her to church, shopping and then back to the church for a meeting at 2. Got home did some chores that needed to be done- didn't get dinner(our only meal of the day yesterday) until almost 6PM
I did get a bag of pomegranites picked to bring home(then picked more this morning before heading home for mom and a friend of her's)
need to catch up on reading here while I have a cup of tea.
Zumba tonight.
Debbie
Napa Valley,CA
I have never seen such a huge pomegranate. What is the deal with the guy on your mom's land, and comes in for hours mostly around mealtime? How did he end up there? Has he been there for a while. Any plan for next step for him? sorry if you have already answered this!2 -
REBECCA I'm sorry about your sister. Addiction is hard to understand, and get over. Some people have the strength, will, disposition, genetics or whatever to get over it and others have much less (or make the wrong choices) and succumb to it. It's really hard to watch.
CLOTHES IN RESTAURANTS, I worked for about a year and a half in a restaurant when in early 20s: I also had to wash clothes after every session. Though I was a waitress and it was health y restaurant they had fried tempura and maybe for that reason I don't know, my clothes always smelled like cooked oil when I got home from even a short shift...
Nice 1h work session in café yesterday early evening. I had two glasses of wine which is very very rare for me these days, (in the past few months I've only had 2 glasses of hard cider) and it put me in a upbeat mood.
Writing has been going less well over the past days and that's hard to deal with.
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For those of us who are lucky enough to be able to share our lives with our grandchildren, this is an interesting article. It's certainly true for me. I loved my own children, but I rarely took great pleasure in them.
https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2021/nov/17/grandmothers-may-be-more-connected-to-grandchildren-than-to-own-offspring
Love Heather UK xxxxxxxx2 -
Good morning all! Happy Wednesday! One more week until a four day weekend! Woo-hoo! We are making home made bread and Stone Soup today! It is actually raining outside; so a good day to be cooking with the kids, inside.
Heather- I tried to write a review on Amazon, but apparently I haven't bought enough from them in the last 6 months. lol (A minimum purchase of $50 without use of coupons, gift cards, etc, is one of the requirements for reviewing things). I will be shopping from there within the month and will submit my glowing review at that time. IF you have another site you want me to leave a review, I can do that. Love the pics of Bea's explorations and the dress is darling! What girl wouldn't love a removable cape!
Rebecca- Ugh! So sorry to hear about your sis and how she is dealing with her alcoholism. I have family members that use social media in the same way; attention seeking instead of helping themselves. Hugs to you!
Allie- You are doing a great job! Keeping lines of communication open (or trying to, with a teen) and showing love and acceptance is so important. Carmine is lucky to have you as he navigates this part of life.
Machka- Love the stone walkway! Nice job!
Flea- Happy all went well! Sending healing thoughts your way!
Pip- Baby Yogi and all of the pics of your pups!
Heather again- Great article! Prof Rilling (I think that was his name?) made me bristle a bit with his explanation of children "manipulating" parents and grandparents emotions. While I do believe that children can and do figure out what works (to get their own wants/needs met) on each adult in their life; I do not believe the child is able to manipulate adults. I think that emotional connection has to come from within us. I actually wrote about this a few years ago in my diary:
November 5, 2017 ·
As I have watched my brothers,sisters, and friends become grandparents for the first time; it has me spending a LOT of time thinking about that "grandlove". For lack of a better word; the love that you have for your grandchildren. Trying to figure out why it seems so much bigger, deeper, wider than the love we have for our children. Perhaps, it is the work that went into loving our own children. They tired us, stressed us, tried us, taught us, tested us. Our own kids showed us what it meant to love unconditionally (or as close to that as we could get). We, at least I, was exhausted in loving my own kids. I think grandlove seems deeper, wider, bigger because as life has gone on, and we have loved and lost; those we have lost, have left holes, hard edges, or calloused spots on our heart. These babies have filled spaces, softened sharp edges, and soothed those calloused places. As they smile, grow, and reach they stretch our hearts so that they are able to hold more love. Deep thoughts for a Sunday morning, but it's the best explanation I can summon from my brain.
Holy Cats! 7:25 already! I have to get moving! ttfn xoxoxox KJ (Kelly)5 -
Heather - I enjoyed that article and Kelly I just love your diary entry.
When I was a young Mom I was sitting at my Grandparents table one day while my Dad was outside playing with my girls. I remember saying to my Grandmother that I didn’t remember my Dad spending that time with me and I was a bit jealous of it.
My grandmother said, a parent has so many worries and so much work to do in raising their child. It is their responsibility to make sure the children’s needs are met and to ensure the children are properly loved, taught and disciplined at the same time they are still learning to be grownups and adults themselves. The toll that takes doesn’t leave a lot of room for play and fun. She went in to say that as a grandparent the role changes, it is no longer the responsibility to ensure all the needs are met and that all the discipline is handed out. It is a grandparents job to just love the grandchildren and enjoy them like you couldn’t your own children because you are more rested and didn’t have all the worry on you.
I strive to be the grandmother she was to me, she never disciplined me, she sure guided me in the right direction though. She met my wants tenfold and I never wanted to disappoint her. I did, of course, but she still loved me and I knew it.
Tracey in Edmonton
Awake way too early and can’t get back to sleep.5 -
Morning ladies
Slept pretty well got up and fed the pup and now going to do my pill box.. which is always a chore...
I have texted Tracy a couple times and ahe hasn't responded but i am using Carminr and him and i dont know if that is throwing her off or not.. but we bave to get used to it right now..
Going to try and work on the afghan today and not get myself upset over it..
Tomorrow i have to pick Carmine up at school and take him to his guitar lesson as Tracy has a drs appointment1 -
KJ and Tracey - Lovely words from both of you about grandparenting. To be honest, I never knew I had it in me.
KJ - Wow! I've never heard that from Amazon before. Thanks so much for persevering. much appreciated.
Bought Edie a nice top for Christmas with sparkly bits. Just saw it and thought of her. Not too girly and young, but still partyish and different. She is very athletic and active and a footballer.
DH is expecting a scheduled phone call from his daughter any minute.
Must try printing out my seagull card soon.
Love Heather UK xxxxxxxx1 -
Allie ~ Is this a sure thing about Carmine or could she/he just be exploring what has become a topic that is talked about a lot now-a-days? I am sure that having the baby come has brought about a lot of changes in the home life for all concerned. Just something I wonder about!
Carol in GA4 -
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Well, Kirby is on a roll, he wants to buy a new refrigerator, stove, washer and dryer. Already ordered the frig that should be here on Sunday. My brother wants and will take our old one and probably the washer n dryer when we are ready. Kirby wants a stackable. He also wants an induction stove, I think he ordered that already too. Let the buying begin. Merry Christmas to him3
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Pip-God Bless Kirby lol atta boy....
Peach- I dont know,but will go with the flow and use the correct pronouns and names for now.. I know religion is not discussed but i am just putting it in Gods hands ..
I heard there is going to be a shortage of dog food ,so i am getting extra wet food now.. taking Alfies to go bag over to Tom and Elenas for next week... one less thing i have to remember.. ,and I might just leave it there ,and replenish just in case of emergencies.
I try and think of things ahead of time.
A year ago last night is when I ended up in the hospital and they ended up doing a echocardiogram a year ago today and a angiogram and hauled me off to Yale for the Open heart surgery...
I am blessed to be in fairly good shape a year later..7 -
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Thank you all for the hugs and thoughts. I don’t know how long it will be before I get an appointment with the doctor. We are short on specialist in this area. I waited 3 months for a urologist and my problem had resolved by the appointment! This problem won’t self resolve, been around too long and just getting worse. I’m still waiting on the imaging department here to schedule my bone density test and routine liver scan ordered by my gastroenterologist a month ago!
Allie you are doing the right thing for Carmine. She is only 13 right? He is just wrestling with his identity right now. That may change when high school come around. Meanwhile— you go girl!
RvRita4 -
Well a pleasant surprise when i opened my bank account this morning..Social Security deposited the back pay.. and it went straight into savings,with alimony and car taxes and other taxes im not touching it until thats all settled with.. sometime early next year.. I am having Lisa who is my insurance broker do my taxes she will know what to do..and will help me with all the medicare paperwork in September when that comes down the pike..
My cousins are all on snapchat and they have me hooked into the family snapchat,my cousin brought there newest little one home today.. you should see the 4 other littles with her its adorable... my cousin Bridget (Gigi) went up to Knoxville to help out.. Bridget and Doug live in Brentwood outside of Nashville and thats who I was visiting and whos daughter just got married... and no not the one that just had the baby.. this is there 5th...lol they thought they were done .. whoopsie.. anyway she is adorable her name is Josie Rose..
Bridget and Dougs other Daughter is due next month with a boy.. so all together they will have 11 grandchildren under 10..
When i went to Costco yesterday i bought myself some B12 tablets im hoping that gives me a little bit of help..i think it will..
Tomorrow afternoon I pick Carmine up at school and take him to his guitar lesson .
I asked yesterday and he see.s to be enjoying them.. also asked about school next year and he wants to go back to the art magnet school he went to for 6 th grade ... it will be a longer day and a bus ride up to Hartford and back .. but if he is willing to put in the work then I say go for it.4 -
The frustrating part with my sister, is when we were texting and she had gotten her meds from the ER doc, I asked if she wanted to just talk on the phone. She said, "I don't really want to text, or talk". So our text ended. But then she plasters FB with a post of how awful it is and to pray for her. So its like I reach out to her, and she slaps my hand away, but will gladly take "my thoughts are with you" from friends from her bar, and high school friends. It makes me feel like I'm nothing. Now I know its not about me. I am too close to the situation I guess, and she knows I know the true problems.
Rebecca5 -
bananasandoranges wrote: »dlfk202000 wrote: »got back in town just in time to pick up my daycare girl. Unloaded the car after I picked her up, stopped and played at the park with her friend(her friend wasn't there last week because she was sick, before that it rained on the days we usually would see her).
Had a nice but unproductive weekend with mom. That was kind of nice. She was tired after we did food program at church Saturday because she was up at 4 AM- she napped with the tv on-(loud and a CSI marathon-she only seems to watch ION TV channel- CSI, Criminal Minds, which was on all yesterday, Friday was Hawaii 5-0)
I met the guy that lives in his motor home on her property- he is getting a bit too comfortable being there, comes on in the house, sits down and stays there for a few hours- usually coming in at meal time. Didn't get the hint to go back to his place when she was falling asleep. That is just rude and a bit creapy to me.
Yesterday I took her to church, shopping and then back to the church for a meeting at 2. Got home did some chores that needed to be done- didn't get dinner(our only meal of the day yesterday) until almost 6PM
I did get a bag of pomegranites picked to bring home(then picked more this morning before heading home for mom and a friend of her's)
need to catch up on reading here while I have a cup of tea.
Zumba tonight.
Debbie
Napa Valley,CA
I have never seen such a huge pomegranate. What is the deal with the guy on your mom's land, and comes in for hours mostly around mealtime? How did he end up there? Has he been there for a while. Any plan for next step for him? sorry if you have already answered this!
Julie- The guy had been living on the property of his son, grandson and new daughter in law- she doesn't want him there. They live just a few houses away from mom. Mom felt sorry for him, He didn't have any other place to go.
He was very quiet the first two months he was there then had a stroke and the son said he wouldn't be back but then a few weeks later, he was back. Mom didn't know anything about the stroke until a week after he had it. He had called the ambulance and told them to come down the driveway quiet so they didn't wake mom. She felt bad about him needing help and was worried about him when he first came back. He came up and asked to buy a can of soup, he wasn't feeling up to driving into town(10miles to the closest town or store), then he came in one time while mom was having lunch and mom, being mom who will feed anyone that needs a meal, and realized he was lonely so it was ok that he sat down, had lunch and visited a bit. Then it has been more frequent and longer visits. He pays her $400 to be attached to the water and electricity and to keep his motor home there on the property. A great deal for him and a good thing for mom to not be on the property by herself in case of an emergency- well, so she thought. Now he just keeps coming and staying.
Mom has to speak up and tell him he is overstepping in many ways. That $400 does not include meals and entertainment.
I don't think he has any plans of leaving but if he can no longer drive, or has another stroke, his son has been looking at facilities to put him in.
Mom has a friend that is supposed to be moving her Airstream onto the property when the place she has been living is sold. First Joanne was moving IN the house, taking what was my bedroom, then she was going to live in the Airstream (that was fine with me) then as I was getting in the car to come home, mom said that Joanne will be taking over the bedroom to sleep AND having her trailer there so she can watch her own shows plus she has a big dog. Who knows what will really happen. But, If that does happen, I will not have a place for me when I go up. I will get the couch(not fun with mom watching tv until midnight or later) or take her bed and sleep with her and her snoring. Again, mom feels bad that Joanne doesn't have a place to go- she lost her husband two years ago, BUT, she has money and can afford to go some place else. If she is there- visiting with mom will be difficult- Joanne is a non stop talker who talks loud. I am going to just wait and see what happens. I do know that if she does move in, I will not be going up and spending as much time as I had planned - my plan was to start spending a week at a time then more in the next year or so(as soon as I am retired I want to be there half the time)
Debbie
Napa Valley,CA
Here is a basket of the pomegranites I have left-
https://photos.google.com/share/AF1QipN0HY3mlPmD_obZ4ug_cvceJqhzzlUrGGZpqiDpBpPGVVrHJBF9OZg1_rO3-qwVSg/photo/AF1QipPpH-1oSRf7uUAst1Qgad1zrDseBTn837lDXx3T?key=S05Ldm5sY3I0SnZlN2xPeFN4VS1SN3pZOGtGSWhB
They are not all as big as the original photo but the one I cut yesterday was 20.5 oz. got me just over 9oz of fruit
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Actually got to use the elliptical today. You know, lately when I walk, I seem to have an ache on the outside of the to of my leg. I was hoping the elliptical wouldn’t bother it, but it did a little. The plan for tomorrow (if I can do it) is to do a body pump DVD
Worked then had to stop at the church to get my lector book for next year, then went to the hospital to get the prolia. My annual physical is tomorrow
Rebecca – I’m so sorry for your sister. Regardless of the cause, it’s still terrible. What a shame the doctors are not treating the cause, only the result
allie – congrats on the windfall! I’m in awe of how supportive you are to Carmine.
Going to go work on the “fence” for Christmas. Newcomer bowling tonight.
Michele NC1 -
Michelle- im doing the best I can .. not much else I can do..1
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Actually got to use the elliptical today. You know, lately when I walk, I seem to have an ache on the outside of the to of my leg. I was hoping the elliptical wouldn’t bother it, but it did a little. The plan for tomorrow (if I can do it) is to do a body pump DVD
Worked then had to stop at the church to get my lector book for next year, then went to the hospital to get the prolia. My annual physical is tomorrow
Rebecca – I’m so sorry for your sister. Regardless of the cause, it’s still terrible. What a shame the doctors are not treating the cause, only the result
allie – congrats on the windfall! I’m in awe of how supportive you are to Carmine.
Going to go work on the “fence” for Christmas. Newcomer bowling tonight.
Michele NC
Yes. I do not think she has ever been truly honest with any doctor that treats her, so they do not know the whole story. The many years she was on Vicodin and morphine. She says it was just a couple months, but it was for longer than that. She just switched doctors when they would question her misuse. To misuse pain killers for her fibromyalgia. I suppose blocking pain is a way to cope with pain, but I think they lost their effects over time.
Rebecca3 -
Stats for the day-
Walk w/family- 1hr 33min 59sec, 37elev, 86ahr, 109mhr, 5.29mi= 471c
Strava app= 639c
Zwift home spin bike- 15.47min, 190elev, 115aw, 68arpm, 134ahr, 160mhr, 5.18mi= 181c
Zwift app= 105c
Walk to gym- 10.52min, .53mi= 53c
Strava app= 65c
Treadmill jog- 29.54min, 6.2-6.3sp, last .10 7.0-8.0sp, 9.51min mi, 136ahr, 177mhr, 5k= 348c
Walk gym to home- 9.47min, .54mi= 54c
Strava app= 65c
Total cal 11172 -
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I am so grateful for the women in this group. I hope the site will stay stable, and that we can continue to share our thoughts, good times and worries. All of you have been good friends. I appreciate the kindness and wisdom shared by all of us. I value our support of one another. 😘 Katla9
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