WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR NOVEMBER 2022

Machka9 wrote: »

Regarding introversion --

I'm still trying to "define" my introversion.

Various sites list traits, a lot of which don't apply to me.

This, for example: https://www.healthline.com/health/what-is-an-introvert

Personality traits of an introvert
A number of factors help shape the unique characteristics that make you who you are, and these factors can also affect the ways introversion shows up in your personality. To put it another way, no two introverts are exactly alike.

That said, you might recognize introversion in yourself by some of the following traits and behaviors.

You need plenty of time for yourself -- Yes!
Do you consider periods of solitude essential for optimal health and well-being? Maybe you find the thought of a quiet night at home positively delightful, whether you plan to spend that time simply resting or enjoying a quiet hobby on your own.
If time alone prompts feelings of peace and relief, not disappointment and stress, you’re likely more introverted than extroverted.

Too much socializing drains you -- Yes. And I don't like social interaction. It's highly unlikely I would hang out with friends on Friday because the interaction between work colleagues is enough and has me craving solitude on Friday evening, Saturday and Sunday.
It’s not true that introverts hate social interaction and avoid it entirely. All the same, you might find yourself needing more time to recharge between events than a more extroverted person.
Hanging out with friends on Friday might max out your energy, leaving you craving solitude on Saturday to rest and refuel.

You have a hard time with conflict -- It depends. I don't usually seek conflict, but I certainly can share my opinion.
Everyday interactions can be draining enough on their own, but what about situations that involve the possibility of conflict?
Some evidence suggests introverted people tend to have a greater sensitivity to negative evaluation and criticism. You might find it tough to share your thoughts when you believe others might disagree with you or disapprove of your opinion. As a result, you might find yourself avoiding conflict whenever possible.

You work better on your own -- Yes!
The mere words “group project” might spark fear in anyone’s heart, but if you find working in groups particularly loathsome, you could certainly be more of an introvert.
Working at your own pace gives you time to reflect and consider your approach before focusing your energy on the task, without having to navigate group dynamics or tune out the chatter.
Of course, this doesn’t necessarily mean you have trouble getting along with others. You may just find it easier to concentrate when working alone. That goes for your hobbies, too — introverted people often choose solitary pastimes, like reading, crafting, gaming, or gardening.

The spotlight doesn’t tempt you -- It depends. Back in my teens, I hated presenting things but then I did a bit of acting and got involved with Toastmasters, and now I usually don't mind being up in front of everyone talking.
Maybe you don’t mind working in smaller groups, but you always choose behind-the-scenes roles.
That might mean you’d rather do the research and write up the report than present it, or you volunteer for tasks that keep you away from the crowd. Far from being the center of attention, you’d rather hover on the fringes where you escape notice.

You prefer a close circle of friends -- I prefer a few low demand acquaintances ... and I'm not that fond of people
Many introverts have just a small circle of friends, but it’s not because they can’t make friends or dislike people. ResearchTrusted Source suggests, in fact, that high-quality relationships play a major role in happiness for introverts.
If you’re an introvert, you might simply prefer to have a few close, intimate friendships rather than a large circle of casual acquaintances. After all, you need more time to yourself than an extroverted person might, so you probably have less time to spend connecting and catching up with a crowd.

You get to know people on a deeper level -- Nope. I can't be bothered to listen and observe from the sidelines. I've got things to do ... and I'm not that fond of people
If you tend to keep to yourself, you might find it perfectly natural to listen and observe from the sidelines. Watching what goes on around you can give you more insight into others and offer clues to their personality and preferences.
Expressing yourself not your strong point? You might become a good listener instead, perhaps even develop a knack for picking up on body language and less obvious cues and emotions in someone’s words, behavior, or tone of voice.
The end result? You learn more about others, which can boost empathy and your ability to offer emotional support.

You spend a lot of time absorbed in your own thoughts -- Yeah, I suppose. Somewhat
Maybe you:
find yourself daydreaming or running through scenarios in your mind before you settle on a plan of action
need more time to process information and weigh options carefully when making decisions
do extensive research before making a big purchase or accepting a job offer
brainstorm a plan of action ahead of major events to prepare for every possibility
Introverts often have an active inner thought process, so these traits can all suggest introversion.

You zone out to get away -- I tend to get up and leave but if I must stay, I'm usually making lists or thinking through a project
Do you catch yourself “escaping” from unpleasant or stressful situations by letting your mind wander or drift to something more relaxing?
Anyone can zone out, but turning inward may offer introverts a way to leave situations that feel chaotic or uncomfortable. In short, it can serve as a survival mechanism, of sorts.
This tendency to get lost in your thoughts may leave others with the impression that you’re shy, distracted, or disinterested. In reality, though, it can help you cope in tense or overwhelming environments, from a loud holiday party to a long meeting with several short-tempered colleagues.

You prefer writing over talking -- Yes!
Maybe the thought of small talk makes you shudder, but writing out your thoughts comes naturally, especially when you’re dealing with complex or difficult emotions.
Many introverts take time to think carefully before speaking, so you might have a hard time offering a quick opinion about anything. Writing, on the other hand, allows you to consider your position thoroughly and choose just the right words to express yourself with confidence and care.

You feel emotions deeply -- I rarely feel emotion, thank goodness
Some evidence suggests introverted people might experience emotions more intensely and have trouble managing those emotions. This greater sensitivity could help explain why many introverts develop depression.

Myths about introverts
We’ve established that introversion isn’t just another way to describe shyness, but plenty of other myths about introversion exist. A few common ones include:

Introverts don’t like people. In reality, introverted people do benefit from close relationships with others, just like most other humans. They typically just prefer to save their social energy for people who understand and support their needs.

No ... I'm just not that fond of most people. But the ones below ring true

Introverts have social anxiety. Sure, some introverted people could also have social anxiety. But that’s thanks to a combination of personality traits, like conscientiousness and neuroticism, rather than introversion alone.
Introverts are more imaginative and creative. Creativity stems from openness, another Big Five trait. Introverted people with high levels of openness might easily be more creative, but this won’t apply to every introvert.
Introverts just need to try harder to be social. If you’re happy with yourself as you are and don’t feel the need to change any of your social habits, draining your energy by trying to force yourself to interact with others when you need time alone will probably only leave you miserable and stressed.

M in Oz