SHOULD I TELL THE WIFE?? cheater
Replies
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Hey, if cheating, lying losers are your thing then by all means, take this one and keep him busy so he doesn't ruin any MORE lives besides yours and those of his FAMILY. Enjoy.0
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She probably already knows deep down and is living in a silent hell, don't make it worse...... She is move on when she is ready. Only Speaking From Experience.0
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don't think for one moment that he'll get with you if you do tell her!
might continue to use you if he can't get it anywhere else though...
seriously, don't be that girl. get some self respect0 -
Don't say anything and move on.0
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You would be hurting people.
Don't let him still have control over you. You need to leave, you know that. If he wanted to be with you, then he wouldn't have gotten married... correct?
He's playing you both. Doesn't sound like a great "man."... I know that its kinda childish and im not really looking to hurt anyone...0 -
^^^^^^^is this shyt for real? please tell me this story is made up. I sincerely hope I raised my daughters to be smarter than this!
THIS!0 -
Truthfully... why would you tell her? WHAT WOULD YOU TELL HER?? that you were hoping to have his first Baby and he divorce her? You should accept he was playing with you... he is married.. you ned to check his *kitten* if he does it again. You are beautiful.. make yourself available so incase someone who IS available comes along you are ready. Sorry he played with your feelings.. but honestly you never should have considered it.. HE IS MARRIED! you didnt need proof on that... he wasnt being wishy washy he was trying to get some side *kitten*!
Hear hear! He's married and that's the end. You were played and his deeds will catch up to him. Move on and meet some available men. You are better than this! If he leave his wife for you . . . ummm he may cheat on you? Food for thought.0 -
Seriously girl, you have some low self esteem going on! You deserve to be happy, to be the ONE person in someone's life that dedicates their life to you in return. You deserve better.
Ignore him, his calls, texts, emails, unfriend him facebook. If he shows up at your door don't answer it. He'll get the idea real quick. If you tell his wife/family it won't help. He may leave her, divorce her and get some nooky from you while he's free, but he had a chance to marry you and he didn't. He didn't choose you. Go find someone that does choose you and isn't going to just use you.
Sorry if this sounds harsh, you need to leave him and this whole situation. Prove to yourself you are worth it, love yourself first!0 -
Please listen to the sugarland song "stay"0
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I know this isnt a topic really for MFP but i need advice... ive known an been inlove with someone for years... we have been dating on an off for 6 years... 2 years ago he got married to a girl he dated inbetween me and him dating... for the last 6 months he texts me, calls me, tells me he really loves me wants to divorce her, wishes i would have his first baby, ect... well i since im nosy... i found her on facebook and his mom also and i found out in my investigating that he ended up adopting her kid but they havent had any together... this girl doesnt work, the kid isnt his.. ect... but now he tells me hes going to try to work it out with her... MIND YOU this is the 3rd time he has done this wishy washy mess with me... well i have proof NOW... im considering airing his dirty laundry to his family and her... I know that its kinda childish and im not really looking to hurt anyone... BUT im sick of him hurting me... telling me 3 times he was going to leave her... 3 times he comes back to me... ive even known and loved this man longer. I want to tell her soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo bad.... but i dont wanna Fk up my Karma... any ideas how i can make this better ALL the way around? and please dont just say let it go.... if it was that easy.. i wouldnt be writing this lol thanks all
She has the ring on her finger.
Not you. Even if you have known him longer he even adopted her child and lets her stay home with out having to work.
He clearly didnt love you.
Telling her this might make you feel better for a minute but think about this what you could potentially be doing is making him cling to her more because YOU decieded to go crazy.
Theres a reason why he keeps going back to her.
Do yourself a favor. Hurt, cry, be mad, and move on.
Delete his number and dont let him come back.0 -
Imagine you somehow wrestle this horrid man away from his wife and family and you marry him, maybe even have a baby with him. 18 months later someone messages you on Facebook to say she's been having an on-off affair with your husband. How would you feel? Better if you didn't know? Better if you'd never got together with someone you knew from the outset is a cheater?
There is no reason to punish his innocent wife for moral crimes you and this reprobate have committed. Get him out of your life immediately and completely.0 -
Be done! Try your best to forget him and move on. If he wanted to be with you, he would have. Let him live his life and karma will catch up to him. Hopefully his wife will realize what a d-bag he is and move on too.0
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im considering airing his dirty laundry to his family and her... I know that its kinda childish and im not really looking to hurt anyone... BUT im sick of him hurting me...
So what do u think is going to happen if u air his dirty laundry...u think feelings arent going to be hurt?? Is that going to make u feel better? U think hes gonna leave her and be with u? NOT GONNA HAPPEN BOO!! Have his first child? UGH!! He already has his first child. He adopted hers therefore making that child his own. Uve been used. I know it hurts but uve already given him way too much of ur time with the back and forth in ur relationship and ur even bigger waste of time of "investigating" I have him if u want but i PROMISE u hes not going to be any better to u. People do what u allow them to do and u have allowed him to string u along for all this time...Its time to keep it moving.0 -
Until I learned to respect and love myself I attracted men that didn't know how to respect and love me. Sounds like once you repair the relationship you have with yourself you won't even be interested in a guy like this.
Honestly...if you don't get help for yourself you will continue to find yourself in these situations.0 -
Oh and your karma is already Fd up. Big time.
IMO there is no such thing as Karma. We have guilt from things that we regret. I think that when we feel bad about something, it affects our actions moving forward.
My advice would be to pray for guidance and understanding. I don't think that you will find that this situation is helping you at all. Look ahead at what you want/need to do and move that direction.0 -
Walk away. Stop reading his texts, stop taking his calls, and stop stalking his family on FB,etc. Just make a clean break, and go live your life. Sounds like you have been living your life for him....no more. Get away from him,,,,,no more drama or wondering, and go live for you.
I agree with the above wholeheartely! Just drop off the face of the Earth as far as he is concerned. It's hard, trust me, we have all been in some kind of situation where our feelings are left out to dry...but being the bigger person here is all that karma needs to show him that what he is doing to you and possibly someone else at some point or another is eventually going to leave him alone and heartbroken himself!0 -
Truthfully... why would you tell her? WHAT WOULD YOU TELL HER?? that you were hoping to have his first Baby and he divorce her? You should accept he was playing with you... he is married.. you ned to check his *kitten* if he does it again. You are beautiful.. make yourself available so incase someone who IS available comes along you are ready. Sorry he played with your feelings.. but honestly you never should have considered it.. HE IS MARRIED! you didnt need proof on that... he wasnt being wishy washy he was trying to get some side *kitten*!
Truth.... and remember Karma is a beast...stop doing to others what you wouldn't want done to you... leave it be..0 -
i was in a very similar situation ( no one was married though)....what i learnt was that was goes around comes around and he damn well knows what he is doing is wrong..in my situation the guys girfriend found out on her own and confronted me and i wouldnt tell or admit anything to her...because basically whatever u r going to tell her, u r going to look like the homewrecker..what i had to teach myself was to move on because their are guys out there that wont do this to you..and that is what u deserve...i PROMISE:)!0
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JERRY! JERRY! JERRY!
[/quote]
lol..0 -
I know this isnt a topic really for MFP but i need advice... ive known an been inlove with someone for years... we have been dating on an off for 6 years... 2 years ago he got married to a girl he dated inbetween me and him dating... for the last 6 months he texts me, calls me, tells me he really loves me wants to divorce her, wishes i would have his first baby, ect... well i since im nosy... i found her on facebook and his mom also and i found out in my investigating that he ended up adopting her kid but they havent had any together... this girl doesnt work, the kid isnt his.. ect... but now he tells me hes going to try to work it out with her... MIND YOU this is the 3rd time he has done this wishy washy mess with me... well i have proof NOW... im considering airing his dirty laundry to his family and her... I know that its kinda childish and im not really looking to hurt anyone... BUT im sick of him hurting me... telling me 3 times he was going to leave her... 3 times he comes back to me... ive even known and loved this man longer. I want to tell her soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo bad.... but i dont wanna Fk up my Karma... any ideas how i can make this better ALL the way around? and please dont just say let it go.... if it was that easy.. i wouldnt be writing this lol thanks all
Time to grow up.
He's MARRIED, and not to you, respect that. What makes you think you're so special he'd treat you any differently than what he's doing to her? AND HE MARRIED HER
He doesn't love you or respect you.
Accept it, walk away, and do it with dignity.0 -
Some of my friends(not me) have what they call "fall back girls". Basically girls they have so hoodwinked that as soon as they get in a fight with their wife they start texting and calling them because they are psycho's that will always do anything for them at the drop of a hat and make them feel better. Dont be one of those girls.0
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I know this isnt a topic really for MFP but i need advice... ive known an been inlove with someone for years... we have been dating on an off for 6 years... 2 years ago he got married to a girl he dated inbetween me and him dating... for the last 6 months he texts me, calls me, tells me he really loves me wants to divorce her, wishes i would have his first baby, ect... well i since im nosy... i found her on facebook and his mom also and i found out in my investigating that he ended up adopting her kid but they havent had any together... this girl doesnt work, the kid isnt his.. ect... but now he tells me hes going to try to work it out with her... MIND YOU this is the 3rd time he has done this wishy washy mess with me... well i have proof NOW... im considering airing his dirty laundry to his family and her... I know that its kinda childish and im not really looking to hurt anyone... BUT im sick of him hurting me... telling me 3 times he was going to leave her... 3 times he comes back to me... ive even known and loved this man longer. I want to tell her soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo bad.... but i dont wanna Fk up my Karma... any ideas how i can make this better ALL the way around? and please dont just say let it go.... if it was that easy.. i wouldnt be writing this lol thanks all
Once a cheater, always a cheater. That statement has never ever lied to me!
Amen to that! Isn't it the truth that , that quote stays the same and so do the people it regards too!0 -
The fact that you made it a blog let's me know
you're hurt by his ways and deep down wanted
to believe him at one point or should I say
three times.
This shouldn't be about checking him I would
do some self evaluating to see why you
entertained this behavior.
You downplaying the way you felt about him
should be your next blog. Ok maybe not0 -
LEAVE HIM!
He's done this 3 times with you... I had similar situation except no "wife" involved... in the end I gave up, I still have feelings I think for him but I don't speak to him anymore and they fade away more and more. I remind myself of that horrible angst and pain everytime I didn't know what was going on I felt and how distressed it made me. He's not worth your time. There's no point in you hurting the wife. It'll hurt more coming from you and it isn't your place to. This man has no integrity and can't be assertive or make up his mind so seriously bin him. It will be hard, no doubt, but in time you'll be glad you did.
He may end up doing what he's done to his wife to you if you did hook up properly. Stop being the other woman, ditch him, find focus elsewhere and move on and find someone lovely worthy of your time and affections. xxx0 -
is this shyt for real? please tell me this story is made up. I sincerely hope I raised my daughters to be smarter than this!
^^^ This exactly. I hope I've raised my boys better too though.0 -
Honestly, I haven't looked at the other responses, but my question to you is WHY do you feel so unworthy of someone to love you ONLY? This guy is a looser! The fact that he when through adopting her son, is BIGGER than him having a child with her....
He obviously is an *kitten* and is going to take his cake and eat it too....but really WHY would you want to be involved AT ALL!!!!
Personally, I would just dump him and move on. Find someone who loves you!!!!
As far as telling her,...though I feel bad that she obviously doesn't know...I don't see why you would feel the need.0 -
IMO there is no such thing as Karma. We have guilt from things that we regret. I think that when we feel bad about something, it affects our actions moving forward.
My advice would be to pray for guidance and understanding. I don't think that you will find that this situation is helping you at all. Look ahead at what you want/need to do and move that direction.
Best response I've seen yet.0 -
Let me know when you guys are on Maury Povich so I can watch this trainwreck. Geesh!!! I feel sorry for the kid that's impacted by your involvement and your plans to tear the family apart over your selfishness.
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LMAO!!!! I cant believe how many people read this are are so quick to give love advice to a nitwit that would get herself into a situation like this...
I got myself into a situation like this when I was real young and stupid.... and got 6 stiches and a broken tooth out of it. Pay the piper baby!!!!
Opinions are like @zz holes, everyone's got one and they all stink....0 -
Seriously people? The OP was NOT PLAYED!! She knew he was married. She made her choice. She is being vindictive because he won't bow to her demands to leave his wife.
Let's keep this 100% ... we all know the wife is not going to believe some jump off (yes, you!) and kick him out on your word.
Proof? You have texts? Wow.. ok? A lot of wives forgive their men OR don't even believe the jump off and guess what - the jump off is still shyt out of luck.
You will not get what you want - you want him to leave her, her to be broken and you to be happy with him.
Karma? Honey, you need to take that class again because you failed Karma 101.0
This discussion has been closed.
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