SHOULD I TELL THE WIFE?? cheater
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Some of my friends(not me) have what they call "fall back girls". Basically girls they have so hoodwinked that as soon as they get in a fight with their wife they start texting and calling them because they are psycho's that will always do anything for them at the drop of a hat and make them feel better. Dont be one of those girls.0
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I know this isnt a topic really for MFP but i need advice... ive known an been inlove with someone for years... we have been dating on an off for 6 years... 2 years ago he got married to a girl he dated inbetween me and him dating... for the last 6 months he texts me, calls me, tells me he really loves me wants to divorce her, wishes i would have his first baby, ect... well i since im nosy... i found her on facebook and his mom also and i found out in my investigating that he ended up adopting her kid but they havent had any together... this girl doesnt work, the kid isnt his.. ect... but now he tells me hes going to try to work it out with her... MIND YOU this is the 3rd time he has done this wishy washy mess with me... well i have proof NOW... im considering airing his dirty laundry to his family and her... I know that its kinda childish and im not really looking to hurt anyone... BUT im sick of him hurting me... telling me 3 times he was going to leave her... 3 times he comes back to me... ive even known and loved this man longer. I want to tell her soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo bad.... but i dont wanna Fk up my Karma... any ideas how i can make this better ALL the way around? and please dont just say let it go.... if it was that easy.. i wouldnt be writing this lol thanks all
Once a cheater, always a cheater. That statement has never ever lied to me!
Amen to that! Isn't it the truth that , that quote stays the same and so do the people it regards too!0 -
The fact that you made it a blog let's me know
you're hurt by his ways and deep down wanted
to believe him at one point or should I say
three times.
This shouldn't be about checking him I would
do some self evaluating to see why you
entertained this behavior.
You downplaying the way you felt about him
should be your next blog. Ok maybe not0 -
LEAVE HIM!
He's done this 3 times with you... I had similar situation except no "wife" involved... in the end I gave up, I still have feelings I think for him but I don't speak to him anymore and they fade away more and more. I remind myself of that horrible angst and pain everytime I didn't know what was going on I felt and how distressed it made me. He's not worth your time. There's no point in you hurting the wife. It'll hurt more coming from you and it isn't your place to. This man has no integrity and can't be assertive or make up his mind so seriously bin him. It will be hard, no doubt, but in time you'll be glad you did.
He may end up doing what he's done to his wife to you if you did hook up properly. Stop being the other woman, ditch him, find focus elsewhere and move on and find someone lovely worthy of your time and affections. xxx0 -
is this shyt for real? please tell me this story is made up. I sincerely hope I raised my daughters to be smarter than this!
^^^ This exactly. I hope I've raised my boys better too though.0 -
Honestly, I haven't looked at the other responses, but my question to you is WHY do you feel so unworthy of someone to love you ONLY? This guy is a looser! The fact that he when through adopting her son, is BIGGER than him having a child with her....
He obviously is an *kitten* and is going to take his cake and eat it too....but really WHY would you want to be involved AT ALL!!!!
Personally, I would just dump him and move on. Find someone who loves you!!!!
As far as telling her,...though I feel bad that she obviously doesn't know...I don't see why you would feel the need.0 -
IMO there is no such thing as Karma. We have guilt from things that we regret. I think that when we feel bad about something, it affects our actions moving forward.
My advice would be to pray for guidance and understanding. I don't think that you will find that this situation is helping you at all. Look ahead at what you want/need to do and move that direction.
Best response I've seen yet.0 -
Let me know when you guys are on Maury Povich so I can watch this trainwreck. Geesh!!! I feel sorry for the kid that's impacted by your involvement and your plans to tear the family apart over your selfishness.
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LMAO!!!! I cant believe how many people read this are are so quick to give love advice to a nitwit that would get herself into a situation like this...
I got myself into a situation like this when I was real young and stupid.... and got 6 stiches and a broken tooth out of it. Pay the piper baby!!!!
Opinions are like @zz holes, everyone's got one and they all stink....0 -
Seriously people? The OP was NOT PLAYED!! She knew he was married. She made her choice. She is being vindictive because he won't bow to her demands to leave his wife.
Let's keep this 100% ... we all know the wife is not going to believe some jump off (yes, you!) and kick him out on your word.
Proof? You have texts? Wow.. ok? A lot of wives forgive their men OR don't even believe the jump off and guess what - the jump off is still shyt out of luck.
You will not get what you want - you want him to leave her, her to be broken and you to be happy with him.
Karma? Honey, you need to take that class again because you failed Karma 101.0 -
I would cut all ties with him and if he keeps going after you, use his wife as leverage.... leave me alone or Ill tell the wife. Dont persue a person like this because the chances that he will do the same to you and have someone on the side if he did marry you.0
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Sorry but you should not have been entertaining his behavior to begin with.....he is a creeper and just wants to have you on the side lines.......what does it solve for you to hurt his wife and child? Are you hoping the SHE would leave HIM, and he would run to you......because as far as he is concerned.....HE isn't the one leaving...........and has no intentions of it....He just want s to have a P@SS/ to run to when his wife doesn't feel like spreading her legs! Its the reality of men like him........he is treating you like his *kitten*.....and you are letting him. Even though you aren't sleeping with him now...his intentions are to get you into bed!
And you shouldn't.......you are young and beautiful with a whole lot of world to experience....don't tie yourself to an A-hole....you will regret it!0 -
.. MIND YOU this is the 3rd time he has done this wishy washy mess with me...
^^^^^^^^^
OK read this statement over and over..now answer the question. Pull up your big girl panties and be done !
Be an adult and wish him well and move on ! His drama doesnt need to involve you ! He didnt want you then he doesnt NEED you now ! so Next Topic Please !
Oh not to mention SHE DOESNT WORK and he adopted her daughter..He is not coming out of that marriage easy now !0 -
and please dont just say let it go.... if it was that easy.. i wouldnt be writing this lol thanks all
It actually IS that easy. Only you can make it difficult. Do the right thing.0 -
IMO there is no such thing as Karma. We have guilt from things that we regret. I think that when we feel bad about something, it affects our actions moving forward.
My advice would be to pray for guidance and understanding. I don't think that you will find that this situation is helping you at all. Look ahead at what you want/need to do and move that direction.
Best response I've seen yet.
Absolutely true!!!0 -
I'm having a glad to be an american moment, cause universally regardless of race age gender or amount of weight loss are giving you sound advice. Don't mess with a marriage it can get yoy killed0
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I know this isnt a topic really for MFP but i need advice... ive known an been inlove with someone for years... we have been dating on an off for 6 years... 2 years ago he got married to a girl he dated inbetween me and him dating... for the last 6 months he texts me, calls me, tells me he really loves me wants to divorce her, wishes i would have his first baby, ect... well i since im nosy... i found her on facebook and his mom also and i found out in my investigating that he ended up adopting her kid but they havent had any together... this girl doesnt work, the kid isnt his.. ect... but now he tells me hes going to try to work it out with her... MIND YOU this is the 3rd time he has done this wishy washy mess with me... well i have proof NOW... im considering airing his dirty laundry to his family and her... I know that its kinda childish and im not really looking to hurt anyone... BUT im sick of him hurting me... telling me 3 times he was going to leave her... 3 times he comes back to me... ive even known and loved this man longer. I want to tell her soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo bad.... but i dont wanna Fk up my Karma... any ideas how i can make this better ALL the way around? and please dont just say let it go.... if it was that easy.. i wouldnt be writing this lol thanks all
Why are you involved w/ a married man? You're just as much to blame as she is. Move on and let him work it out with her.
Home wrecked
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is this shyt for real? please tell me this story is made up. I sincerely hope I raised my daughters to be smarter than this!
This!!!
& Please don't be a homewrecker. You can't blame him for hurting you & him doing this to you after the first time, it's on you. Nothing positive will be accomplished with telling her. OMG I could go on for days about how ridiculous this is, but I'm going to stop: don't tell her. Leave it alone. It IS that easy.0 -
if you are tired of him hurting YOU stop allowing it! Stop taking his calls and text messages period!0
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What has the WIFE done to you? Why didn't you "tell her" when he first came sniffing around?
In my opinion, BOTH of you are equally responsible for this cheating. Chalk it up as a lose and move on.
Like another poster stated. YOU allowed him to hurt you, because you knew beforehand that he chose to MARRY her :flowerforyou:0
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