Email to the ex-husband

ffuunnnnyy__ggiirrll
ffuunnnnyy__ggiirrll Posts: 431
edited November 2 in Chit-Chat
Dear Ex-husband (I called him something a little more R rated but this is a PG-13 site):

I would like to discuss with you your non-payment of child support/alimony. I have decided that I want to start dating again, and I could really use the extra money. While I have been able to manage fine without you meeting your financial obligations, if you were to start paying me regularly it would free up money to pay for things like babysitters, dinner with my friends, and drinks. I know that you know that I never paid for a drink in my life (thanks guys!), but it is nice to actually offer to pay, and to do that I really need to have money in my wallet. Extra money would also allow me to get my hair done, mani/pedi's, and of course bikini-waxing, because you never know what might happen.

It would actually benefit (I was going to say behoove but I know you don't know what that means) you to meet your responsibilites because a sexually satisfied ex-wife is a happy ex-wife! That means when you blow-off your son's game again or forget to call the kids for weeks, I will be less likely to b*tch you out about it. Ultimately, by paying alimony now so I can date, it means that you won't have to pay it later. I am sure you will ask what I mean by that, it means I will hopefully be remarried.

I trust that I will be receiving a check from you in the very near future.

Sincerely,
Ex-wife
«134567

Replies

  • EmCarroll1990
    EmCarroll1990 Posts: 2,832 Member
    My dad stopped paying child support a long time ago, started to add up to like 50 or 60, 000. Then the US government moved in and sent him to the penitentiary (sp?), needless to say, he's making whatever payments he can now.
  • Sh1tsRainbows
    Sh1tsRainbows Posts: 1,227 Member
    LOVE IT!!! :drinker:
  • k2quiere
    k2quiere Posts: 4,151 Member
    That was too mild, and not nearly sarcastic enough :laugh: ...tell me he's not like the majority on here and actually GETS sarcasm.:noway:
  • Krizzle4Rizzle
    Krizzle4Rizzle Posts: 2,704 Member
    :laugh:
  • MyFeistyEvolution
    MyFeistyEvolution Posts: 1,014 Member
    :heart:
  • juliecat1
    juliecat1 Posts: 3,450 Member
    :laugh:
  • Unknown
    Unknown
    This content has been removed.
  • Begood03
    Begood03 Posts: 1,259 Member
    Ant parent that doesn't do whatever it takes to raise their child the best way possible, is a POS!!! I didn't have a child until I knew I was ready. And that meant always putting my child's needs first, no matter what. I am very happy to say that my son turned out to be a very good adult.
  • Yanicka1
    Yanicka1 Posts: 4,564 Member
    Hummmm as a women that has to pay chaild support even if we have the kid 50/50% I sure hope you are sarcastic.
  • SuzMac1981
    SuzMac1981 Posts: 708 Member
    I like what you've written.... as a single mom to a little girl whose father doesn't pay child support, I understand where you are coming from.

    However, "child support" is supposed to be money that supports the child. I probably would have spun my letter in that direction rather than in the "look at me, I want to date" direction. I feel like that will cause an argument... regardless of how you REALLY want to use the money, it's meant to "support" the "child".
  • cygnetpro
    cygnetpro Posts: 419 Member
    I'm lucky in that regard-- my ex is NEVER late with his payment, and is a pretty good dad overall. Loves his kids, and would never let his kids go without, I'm sure. I never had to take him to court-- we came up with a figure like grownups, and he makes it happen.

    In your state, can you take him to a version of Domestic Relations, and have his wages garnished? As for the alimony, in my state that has to be negotiated as part of the divorce settlement. I can't go back for it later. But child support is different. . Good luck!
  • slayerdan
    slayerdan Posts: 193
    Pretty bland. As an ex husband that paid for my baby girl and everything else over 18 years, if this were a real letter, I would inform you it would not work.

    Saying to your ex hey give me the money youowe me so I can drink, get waxed, get laid, and party prolly isnt gonna work. Gonna have the opposite impact.

    I am totally against POS dads--AND moms cuz they are out there too. You put the time in to sport it, then you need to abort it or support it. Not walk away.

    I know this was in jest but Im sure it has a basis in fact---if you have a POS ex, I hope you get your cash. Cash aside, I hope he goes to see his kids game---in 8 years I missed 3 games, and will always treasure those memories.

    Luck.
  • cygnetpro
    cygnetpro Posts: 419 Member
    Ant parent that doesn't do whatever it takes to raise their child the best way possible, is a POS!!! I didn't have a child until I knew I was ready. And that meant always putting my child's needs first, no matter what. I am very happy to say that my son turned out to be a very good adult.

    Love it! There are some terrific dads out there!
  • seehawkmomma
    seehawkmomma Posts: 815
    bump
  • jazzie2421
    jazzie2421 Posts: 45
    LOL If I sent that to my ex-husband, he'd rack up even more past due support (currently at over 17K) because he wouldn't understand the sarcasm. Get your local Child Support Enforcement involved. They'll get it for you. ;)
  • drpurl
    drpurl Posts: 190 Member
    Thank God my support payments come right out of his check or I would never get anything.
  • harley0269
    harley0269 Posts: 384 Member
    However, "child support" is supposed to be money that supports the child. I probably would have spun my letter in that direction rather than in the "look at me, I want to date" direction. I feel like that will cause an argument... regardless of how you REALLY want to use the money, it's meant to "support" the "child".



    THIS^^^
  • Ambrogio1
    Ambrogio1 Posts: 518 Member
    Do you take IOU's?
    How about a post dated check?

    Thanks
  • jennajava
    jennajava Posts: 2,176 Member
    images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRTGtfk9j0siEvShrSgK5K-ujCqCTOYpy9YSEUFM0G61psAXED75aMuR86B
  • LadyKT
    LadyKT Posts: 287 Member
    However, "child support" is supposed to be money that supports the child. I probably would have spun my letter in that direction rather than in the "look at me, I want to date" direction. I feel like that will cause an argument... regardless of how you REALLY want to use the money, it's meant to "support" the "child".

    ^ This. Is OP making fun of those beverly hills housewives again?
  • tizzylish1974
    tizzylish1974 Posts: 1
    Funny_girl, I like you! Dating is awesome and SO much fun. I wish you many amazing experiences as you begin dating again.
  • niknak2308
    niknak2308 Posts: 315 Member
    I guess it works different here in the UK then as the CSA "don't do backpay". Someone I know gets a measly £5 a fortnight and as I said, they won't even look into backpay. £5 doesn't barely covers a days worth of food for a teenager, let alone clothes, roof over their head, school trips etc etc.... :explode:
  • Becoming_A_Butterfly
    Becoming_A_Butterfly Posts: 2,534 Member
    As a woman with a fiance who deals with an ex-wife who would write something like this with all the seriousness in the world, and who spends every cent of child support on herself while neglecting the kids, well, it was hard to find this amusing at all. If the funny part is supposed to be that women don't actually do this, then it missed its mark entirely.
  • katyejean
    katyejean Posts: 233 Member
    I have a feeling that if he took you to court over the use of child support, this letter would be printed and handed over. And in return, you'll be the one in trouble. I don't really know anything about the court system, let alone anything about child support, but it's named child support for a reason, and I have seen (mostly) women having to pay it all back because they used it for their own personal needs. You probably should have clearly stated that you can use his money to help pay for your kid, and your own money to pay for your drinks. It sounds silly to have to put it that way, but I know the court system can take a letter such as yours and turn it completely around, and you would lose the case and be SOL.
  • tomomatic
    tomomatic Posts: 1,794 Member
    Good grief.

    The letter is funny and a nice way to vent but don't send it. Let your lawyer do all the talking for you. I assume that if you're getting alimony and child support, that he's also paying for your attorney fees. That's a $300-350 per hour message that's being delivered on his dime. Hit him where it hurts.

    Unless he's jobless and broke. In which case, getting blood out of rock is gonna be rough.
  • deadstarsunburn
    deadstarsunburn Posts: 1,337 Member
    I hate people who don't pay child support.
    In Indiana they have spouse support if you get a divorce. Which seems a little ridiculous. My uncle has to pay spouse support but he has the kids all the time except every other weekend. His ex-wife doesn't work and lives with her unemployed boyfriend, so their both being supported by him.

    Anyway I hope he pays you, people who don't pay child support are worthless *kitten* hats. They obviously are too selfish to make sure their children's needs are satisfied first.

    Also it may not be a good idea to joke about spending the money elsewhere. My boyfriend's mom actually spent his child support on stuff like that and he got a letter in the mail saying if it wasn't given to or used for him he could contact someone. Which obviously he wasn't going to do to his mother. It would give your ex-husband "proof" of spending it on that even if you were joking.

    <3
  • Rubyinthesand2012
    Rubyinthesand2012 Posts: 92
    My dad stopped paying child support a long time ago, started to add up to like 50 or 60, 000. Then the US government moved in and sent him to the penitentiary (sp?), needless to say, he's making whatever payments he can now.

    i wish they did that in this country... my EX doesnt pay a penny in child support he did for the first year we were seperated then he stopped (almost 5 yrs now without anything)
    i have moved on and am living with my new partner who is a wonderful man and me and my children want for nothing. we even said IF my ex was to start paying that we would put it into the childrens savings accounts for their future.
  • drvvork
    drvvork Posts: 1,162
    I recognize the sarcasm in this - but the child support that one father paid when he could and the other that was like pulling teeth but was finally paid did not go on me. It was directly spent on my children. I kept records, even though the fathers might question why I felt cable and telephone was important but it was for their children. I even had one ask me why I showed rent included - I explained that it was showing only 1/2 of the rent (I had to explain that this was a showing of his half of the bills - even showing what I paid in supporting his child which was extrememly lopsided - eye surgeries, special shoes, etc). There was no arguments when I did get my hair done or a new outfit. I was only questioned once as to how I spent the money. I threatened to send an itemized billing monthly if needed but it never came to that. Thank goodness, it would have cost additional cost for bookkeeping and postage.
  • kaits108
    kaits108 Posts: 305 Member
    I like what you've written.... as a single mom to a little girl whose father doesn't pay child support, I understand where you are coming from.

    However, "child support" is supposed to be money that supports the child. I probably would have spun my letter in that direction rather than in the "look at me, I want to date" direction. I feel like that will cause an argument... regardless of how you REALLY want to use the money, it's meant to "support" the "child".

    Completely agree! Also coming from a single mom to a child whose father doesn't pay child support.

    I totally understand your frustration, however just be careful what you put in writing if you're working through the court system!
  • drpurl
    drpurl Posts: 190 Member
    It also said Alimony, which she can use however she feels see fit.
This discussion has been closed.

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