Am I fat?

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  • teagin2002
    teagin2002 Posts: 1,901 Member
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    I used to have an eating disorder when I was in High school and I was small. I actually saw other people who weighed more than me as smaller and more beautiful for some reason. I would be so surprised to find out how much they weighed. I didn't see myself as thin at all even though my collar bones and hip bones were protruding.

    It is an illness and sadly no matter how thin I got I never saw myself as thin and everyone else around me was thin and beautiful but me.

    Luckily I don't have that problem any more :flowerforyou:
    I am loving my curves :love:
  • jemachharo
    jemachharo Posts: 144 Member
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    I've always seen myself as smaller than I am. Then I catch my reflection in a mirror or window when I'm not expecting it (not holding in my belly and standing up tall) or see myself in a photo and think "Crap, am I really that big?"
  • stewsh
    stewsh Posts: 18 Member
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    I am backwards. I think I look fine, even in my stupid size 16 pants, then I get a glimpse of myself in the bathroom mirror and realize I look horrible. I have convinced myself that I look better than I do and therefore, I don't work as hard to look good. I view others as fat (except the obviously skinny ones) and think I must look better than they do. I'm still unhappy with myself, but fake like I'm ok with it. I think I need a couch and a conversation about my mother :tongue:
  • sarahgilmore
    sarahgilmore Posts: 572 Member
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    Regardless of her "number" Am I the only one who thinks the girl on the right is the sexiest?

    The one in the middle is kinda, blah. Nothing exciting there, move on. And on the left - that's particularly UNappealing.

    But I get that that is what a lot of women here are aiming for. And more power to them if that's what they want, it's just not my thing.
    Does anyone else feel the same?


    I see women my size (5'4", 170lb, NZ size 14-16 / US size 12-ish), or even a little bigger and think they look awesome. So many before pictures on the success board, I think, WHY? You looked better before!
    I look at myself in the mirror and think I look GOOD. Sideways, a little improvement on the belly could me made, but otherwise, I'm happy being at the larger end of normal.
  • ahinski
    ahinski Posts: 200 Member
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    I could strangle the person who started the misconception that people with eating disorders believe they are fat. I suffered from an eating disorder for many years (I am now 100% recovered). When I was at a healthy weight, I KNEW I was not fat, but I wanted to be thinner. When I was underweight, I KNEW I was underweight but wanted to be thinner. It was ALL about control, low self-esteem, and selfishness, but never actually about thinking that I was fat.

    Only people with the very rare disorder called "Body Dismorphic Disorder" actually believe they are fat when they aren't.

    Either way, why do you care if people with eating disorders think you're fat?
  • shebee25
    shebee25 Posts: 11 Member
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    My story is hauntingly similar. I was always teased growing up and called “skinny minny”. I used to drink a shake called ‘weight on’ because I wanted curves.

    I always joke the ‘weight on’ shakes all caught up at once. I like you, never saw how big I was until I looked at pictures. I have a thyroid problem which contributed to my weight gain, along with having a child at 32.

    It is a life change and it is forever. I am 5’7” and weigh 120 pounds (I have lost over 70 pounds) but I still feel I need to lose just 5 or 10 more. I know it sounds really crazy but everyday I get dressed I worry my clothes are going to be tight today. I too lacked the motivation and accepted being 'overweight' forever. I pray I never allow myself to get back to that place, I am a different person now, happier and definately more active. Best of luck with your success - I have been on this cahllenge for a year now and will never look back!
  • chulie
    chulie Posts: 282
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    I am backwards. I think I look fine, even in my stupid size 16 pants, then I get a glimpse of myself in the bathroom mirror and realize I look horrible. I have convinced myself that I look better than I do and therefore, I don't work as hard to look good. I view others as fat (except the obviously skinny ones) and think I must look better than they do. I'm still unhappy with myself, but fake like I'm ok with it. I think I need a couch and a conversation about my mother :tongue:

    Amen about the conversation with my mother!!hahaha... I always grew up watching my mom criticize herself....complaining about her stomach being too big...if I came downstairs and asked my mom if I looked fat in something, she would say " If you think your fat, what does that make me?!?". My mother is a great woman who is as close to June Clever as any woman can come...but she had SERIOUS body issues....wanna guess what I am most critical about on myself??? My stomach of course....ironically the one area my mother always complained about.....I'm 5'9 and in my avatar pic I am the best weight I have ever been...150 lbs...but I was healthy, running and i FELT great....and even THEN I would STILL complain about my stomach!!!! I've had a baby 9.5 months ago and of COURSE the stomach issue is now magnified.....I want it gone...but the one thing I have learned is that I am going to DO something about it, not just complain about it...... I realize this is off topic but...I just had to comment on the mother comment..hahaha....I am NEVER going to use the word fat around my daughter...I don't want her growing up as unhappy with her weight at as I did....I am going to break the cycle and teach her to LOVE herself no matter how she looks and to not be SO critical of herself... when she asks me if SHE looks fat in something...I am going to tell her she is gorgeous and as long as she FEELS good and confident in herself...she can never look fat in something....unless it's phat with a p-h....hahahahahaha...
  • FlyByJuly
    FlyByJuly Posts: 564 Member
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    I still view my self as fat.

    Uhmmm...helloooo. If that profile pic is you, I like the way you carry your fat. :happy:
  • 1Timothy4v8
    1Timothy4v8 Posts: 503 Member
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    I have always thought that the phrase "I am fat / he is fat / they are fat" was one of those bad quirks of the english language that really did overweight people a lot of psychological harm.

    No one IS fat.. It implies that the only thing that makes up their entire body is fat.

    The TRUTH is none of us ARE fat... we all HAVE fat.. some more than others..
    and the other truth is we are ALL 'skinny' in that, we all have skin....just like animals are hairy or furry, get it?

    Think of a steak.. some are lean, and some have more fat.. perhaps marbled though, and perhaps just around the edge. Both are appealing to some, not appealing to others... but both have quality and value.

    ok off my language soap-box for today!


    Very well put ^^^^
  • aworkma6
    aworkma6 Posts: 31
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    Personally, I feel there is nothing wrong with being "fat". "Fat" is a word people have been using FOREVER to tear down other people. It is just a word. I identify as fat and own it. Fat is not a bad thing.
  • GreatSetOfBrains
    GreatSetOfBrains Posts: 675 Member
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    I could strangle the person who started the misconception that people with eating disorders believe they are fat. I suffered from an eating disorder for many years (I am now 100% recovered). When I was at a healthy weight, I KNEW I was not fat, but I wanted to be thinner. When I was underweight, I KNEW I was underweight but wanted to be thinner. It was ALL about control, low self-esteem, and selfishness, but never actually about thinking that I was fat.

    Only people with the very rare disorder called "Body Dismorphic Disorder" actually believe they are fat when they aren't.

    Either way, why do you care if people with eating disorders think you're fat?

    I don't care f they think I am fat. I was trying to discover how ppl with eating disorders view others. I'm just trying to understand how my friend can say she is fat, her words, when she also says she wants to be skinny like me. . I'm like 50lbs heavier. Just trying to understand.
  • cHaRlIe0411
    cHaRlIe0411 Posts: 137 Member
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    When I was younger, I was slim (even now I can't refer to myself as "skinny") 5'7" and 115 pounds at 34-23-34. I thought I was a COW! Everyone else looked normal. My one friend who was exactly my size looked skinny. I mean, sure, if someone was really overweight, I saw them as fat, but didn't judge b/c I saw me in them. I am so much happier now to have a more realistic body image, but it is tough. I struggle with not obsessing over the ucky parts of me in the mirror. I will only sabotage myself. Good luck!

    Cute ticker! Lol
    My friend is 5'7 and wants to be skinny like me. I weigh 152 she weights 98. I just can't grasp that!

    I don't understand... I'm 5'7 and weight 143.. with just a tiny amount of fat! I think the healthy weight for 5'7 is between 118 and 152...
  • InTheInbetween
    InTheInbetween Posts: 192 Member
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    I do. I see that others are not wearing clothes that fit them and they obviously are having trouble with portion control or eating the right kinds of food, or maybe even having no time to exercise.
    At the same time, I fell into a trap of filling those moments for myself with excuses. So I went from being anorexic to a compulsive overeater to an exercise bulimic. Now, I'm recovering but somewhere inbetween them all.
    I have channeled this feeling into wanting to help others -- so I plan to go to school for nutrition research and become a health coach of some kind. I think finding something in your life that benefits others instead of potentially sending out those negative thoughts as judgments (even if you don't say them, it can be felt) is a great way to transform "seeing others as fat."

    ^^^^ THIS THIS THIS THIS
    I can't help but compare myself to EVERYONE I see and when I see someone who I think might be about my size I automatically start scrutinizing every little detail on them. It's not really about THEM though it's about ME . . . others are a mirror for how I see myself and I find myself inadvertently judging THEM as a means of bashing on myself. I look at another person and think "Do my thighs look like that? If they do then I'm really disgusting." or "She looks like she's about my size but oh my god then MY butt must look like that and that's gross!" It's a completely distorted way of thinking but it's entirely a reflection on how I perceive myself, not actually the person I'm looking at. :frown:
  • Selyan
    Selyan Posts: 51
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    I think I only see other people as they are. Maybe I notice the way other people look more than "normal persons" do, because I'm always comparing myself with everybody ele, but I don't think that people with a normal weight are fat.
  • umachanxo
    umachanxo Posts: 926 Member
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    I'm 5"7 weighing in at 148lbs. Measurements are 34-28-36 and I'd be lying if I didn't pick myself apart some days. But that doesn't mean that I view others as large or anything. I hardly pay attention to other people's weight, to be honest.
  • rawardle
    rawardle Posts: 5 Member
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    People with eating disorders do not view others as fat. There image is completely distorted and they themselves look fat but others just look normal. I was anorexic (5'3, 71lbs at my lowest) and I always commented on how I wanted to be skinny like my friends who were just normal sized. It is an incredibly confusing disorder for regular people to understand.
  • WallyGirl358
    WallyGirl358 Posts: 69
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    Great picture. I thought I didn't really see myself as fat but I am between a 12-14 and I think I look bigger than the size 16 shown here. hmmmm Something to think about.
  • beach_chelle
    beach_chelle Posts: 221
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    I was always on the thin side growing up. I didn't know it till I was older and looked back. I never thought about my weight back then. I just accepted my body for what it was. I guess you could say I sorta took it for granted, After 2 kids, I snapped back to a size 4-6 without effort. But the ride was soon to end. I was on anti-depressants for 4 years, and even though I saw the weight coming on, I didn't care! I ignored it. That's part of what those awful pills do- they make you care less (I'll let the professionals explain that better). After a while it hit me that I didn't have much in my closet that fit me anymore. I'd see pics and be shocked at what I looked like! I joked to my Hubby that I had reverse anorexia. I didn't see the girl in the mirror that I saw in pictures. Now when I look at old pics, I kick myself for not doing anything to maintain what I had. BUT, I can't beat myself up forever. I can only move forward, which is exactly what I am doing.

    I think I know what you mean, my inner image is skinnier than my outer one.

    I also have a friend who has always been at a healthy weight but complained of her "fatness" I just tell her how great she looks and move on.

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