The secrets to cutting fat and looking awesome

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  • carrie_eggo
    carrie_eggo Posts: 1,396 Member
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    You should also sing The Star Spangled Banner before every work out. You will burn more calories this way. I know I do.

    Does this work if I'm not American? Can I sing Advance Australia Fair or does it have to be the SSB?

    It doesn't matter as long as you place your right hand over your heart rate monitor.
  • Acg67
    Acg67 Posts: 12,142 Member
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    Rule 2 is the BEST.

    True story that is the one i strictly adhere too, srs

    haters-pony.gif
  • rileysowner
    rileysowner Posts: 8,239 Member
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    I tried the hopping on one foot while drinking ice water. I couldn't seem to hold the glass still enough to drink, and the water was sloshing all over. Then an ice cube came out, and got under my hopping foot. Down I went twisting my ankle and wrenching my knee. I had to drag myself up several fights of stairs through a snow storm to try to find help, only to find that no on was there. Then I crawled one legged to the ER. According to my HRM I burned 3000 calories doing this. I think I will do it every day, but man it hurts.
  • Rayman79
    Rayman79 Posts: 2,009 Member
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    I tried the hopping on one foot while drinking ice water. I couldn't seem to hold the glass still enough to drink, and the water was sloshing all over. Then an ice cube came out, and got under my hopping foot. Down I went twisting my ankle and wrenching my knee. I had to drag myself up several fights of stairs through a snow storm to try to find help, only to find that no on was there. Then I crawled one legged to the ER. According to my HRM I burned 3000 calories doing this. I think I will do it every day, but man it hurts.

    3000 cals, great burn! :bigsmile:
  • rileysowner
    rileysowner Posts: 8,239 Member
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    I question the validity of your statements because I didn't see this advice on Dr. Oz. Perhaps it works for you sir but without the proper credentials you shouldn't be sharing on this site. :tongue:
    WHY YOU GOTTA INSULT HIM?

    Some people are so negative.
  • robin52077
    robin52077 Posts: 4,383 Member
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    LMAO

    bump
  • Otis_Toussaint
    Otis_Toussaint Posts: 18
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    Make sure you're *kitten* in HIIT levels with low intervals...
  • Takes2long
    Takes2long Posts: 367 Member
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    I tried the hopping on one foot while drinking ice water. I couldn't seem to hold the glass still enough to drink, and the water was sloshing all over. Then an ice cube came out, and got under my hopping foot. Down I went twisting my ankle and wrenching my knee. I had to drag myself up several fights of stairs through a snow storm to try to find help, only to find that no on was there. Then I crawled one legged to the ER. According to my HRM I burned 3000 calories doing this. I think I will do it every day, but man it hurts.

    OMG!!!! Ahahahahaha!! Remember to EAT your calories!!!!
  • Takes2long
    Takes2long Posts: 367 Member
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    In all seroiusnessesss...the OP said the secret to CUTTING fat and looking awesome. Am I the only one that noticed no one has said HOW to cut fat? Ok, I'll say it. You need a sharp knife, then cut the fat into small chunks. Then they're OK to eat. The smaller the chunks, the less calories they contain. They have to be SMALL, though. The amount doesnt matter, only the size. Ahahaha. SEE, size DOES matter!
  • Trechechus
    Trechechus Posts: 2,819 Member
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    Love.
    :heart:
  • Macrocarpa
    Macrocarpa Posts: 121 Member
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    Hey I got told that every time you cut a piece of food in half, that's half the calories. So I've been having boston cheesecake smoothies for the past six weeks because they're like .0000001 calories, but I can't seem to shift the belly fat. Any hints?
  • gleechick609
    gleechick609 Posts: 551
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    2) Eat Ben and Jerry’s or Haagen Dazs 3-7 nights a week. The reason for this is that both companies use magic cows to source their cream, and it has been shown to exponentially increase fat burning.

    Done and Done! :laugh:
  • gleechick609
    gleechick609 Posts: 551
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    glee-season-three-cheerleader-unicorn.jpg
  • Yanicka1
    Yanicka1 Posts: 4,564 Member
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    well since you obviously had great results, i will believe everything you say without question. Thank you so much for sharing.
  • MaddoxsMommy
    MaddoxsMommy Posts: 51 Member
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    Bump :)
  • WickedGarden
    WickedGarden Posts: 944 Member
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    nice post...i'll be sure to post it on my mirror.
  • AFitJamie
    AFitJamie Posts: 172 Member
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    Exceptional post!

    And obviously great advice...do you have any references from "unicorn Journal", Or the "Magic Cow institute for lactate dieting" I could reference?
  • clwatlington
    clwatlington Posts: 54 Member
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    absolutely hysterical
  • OneSchrutebuck
    OneSchrutebuck Posts: 44
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    LOL! Love the insulin fairy part ;)
  • r1ghtpath
    r1ghtpath Posts: 701 Member
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    hey!!! i have a unicorn free to a good home, if anyone is interested. looks like i need to stop eating my white carbs while riding her!!!

    i'm kinda bummed ;-)

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