To all you haters

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Replies

  • Nopedotjpeg
    Nopedotjpeg Posts: 1,805 Member
    Stop acting like the entire ****ing world is putting you down or putting you on a pedestal. I've had severe social anxiety where in the back of my head I've thought the same thing, but when I'm being RATIONAL I know that's not true. The talk about "haters" is done either in meme culture or to try and sound cool (however it ends up sounding ghetto as ****). Nobody is actually "hating" on you.
  • jrusso28
    jrusso28 Posts: 249 Member
    Yes, we're all beautiful, intelligent people on the inside as the original poster suggested, but that doesn't do us a bit of good if we're dead of a heart attack, or diabetes, or some other weight-related malady at a ridiculously young age.

    I suppose that makes me a "hater"...I don't intend to be, but such is life I guess. :)

    Agree with this !!
  • VeronicaMcGuinness
    VeronicaMcGuinness Posts: 35
    I agree , I would never get sickly skinny. I am very fit , not to mention I am only 5'2" so 119 is ideal weight for my height..I get more greif about being short than I do my weight..LOL! I think both side of the spectrum are guilty for judging each other , I think it is in all how you feel most comfortable , If you are happy being heavy , that is your choice...I personally was NOT happy that way., I wanted to be healthy and look good and feel good in my own skin. I am finally happy with myself and it radiates in every aspect of my life , more self esteem , better moods , much healthier..All of which I made my personal goal when I joined this site...
  • Camilalea
    Camilalea Posts: 18 Member
    While I agree with this post, I think it's worth mentioning that skinny people can be healthy and beautiful, too! People often assume that heavier people are the only ones faced with "haters." ALL body types are beautiful.
  • amyrizer
    amyrizer Posts: 2
    I couldn't agree more !!! Bravo !!!!!
  • jcstanton
    jcstanton Posts: 1,849 Member
    but what the F do you say if she has a cute face?

    You simply say, "You're cute," and leave the face out of it. To say, "You have such a cute face," is to limit the cuteness to her face, thereby implying that, from the neck down, she is not attractive.
  • 1Timothy4v8
    1Timothy4v8 Posts: 503 Member
    I know Sooo many guiy's that love the chunck! so them skinny minni's need to save face
  • BrendaLee
    BrendaLee Posts: 4,463 Member
    Stop acting like the entire ****ing world is putting you down or putting you on a pedestal. I've had severe social anxiety where in the back of my head I've thought the same thing, but when I'm being RATIONAL I know that's not true. The talk about "haters" is done either in meme culture or to try and sound cool (however it ends up sounding ghetto as ****). Nobody is actually "hating" on you.

    No offense, but BS. If you're fat, people are "hating on you" everywhere you go.
  • Nopedotjpeg
    Nopedotjpeg Posts: 1,805 Member
    but what the F do you say if she has a cute face?

    You simly say, "You're cute," and leave the face out of it. To say, "You have such a cute face," is to limit the cuteness to her face, thereby implying that, from the neck down, she is not attractive.

    Do all women extrapolate like this? Christ, I wish I was getting random compliments from people that I could nit pick to death.
  • christibam
    christibam Posts: 478 Member
    Stop acting like the entire ****ing world is putting you down or putting you on a pedestal. I've had severe social anxiety where in the back of my head I've thought the same thing, but when I'm being RATIONAL I know that's not true. The talk about "haters" is done either in meme culture or to try and sound cool (however it ends up sounding ghetto as ****). Nobody is actually "hating" on you.

    HELL ****ING YEAH!

    I used to think people were hating on me and my fatness all the time. I'd just be minding my own business at Golden Corral with my giant *kitten* plate of friend food and chocolate and these skinny haters would look at me and whisper to each other about me! HATERS!!!

    Yeah... no. It was the fact that I was cramming food in my face hole.

    Yesterday I was running (yes, actually running) up a pretty steep hill and about ready to die with my fatness and not-able-to-breathe-ness... some really cute guy drove by and gave me a thumbs up! I blushed and ran home to tell my husband.

    I have not noticed a single 'hater' now that I changed my attitude. Y'all be hatin' now.
  • christibam
    christibam Posts: 478 Member


    No offense, but BS. If you're fat, people are "hating on you" everywhere you go.

    You must live in a city with a bunch of mean *kitten*. I don't get haters and I'm still fat. I get compliments and smiles.
  • isaacs06
    isaacs06 Posts: 75 Member
    i love this. you are awesome.
  • jerzygrl5k
    jerzygrl5k Posts: 13 Member
    Exactly! You tell them. We are all beautiful. I'm over 200 but I feel beautiful everyday. Losing weight for health not self-esteem.
  • Nopedotjpeg
    Nopedotjpeg Posts: 1,805 Member
    Stop acting like the entire ****ing world is putting you down or putting you on a pedestal. I've had severe social anxiety where in the back of my head I've thought the same thing, but when I'm being RATIONAL I know that's not true. The talk about "haters" is done either in meme culture or to try and sound cool (however it ends up sounding ghetto as ****). Nobody is actually "hating" on you.

    No offense, but BS. If you're fat, people are "hating on you" everywhere you go.

    Yes we catch extra **** for being overweight/obese, and I know this first hand, but a lot of it is perceived as well (which I also know first hand). You'll have people who will be rude, and probably the reason I don't like children is because they have no filter and I'm big, but it all has to do with yourself.

    I always thought I have no confidence because I didn't put up some false bravado like -some people- do. However, that is not true confidence as I understand it. True confidence is understanding your weak points are your weak points, but also knowing that they don't define or overshadow your strong points. My weight is my weak point. But I'm working on it, slow but surely, and it doesn't mean my strong points are null and void either.
  • VeronicaMcGuinness
    VeronicaMcGuinness Posts: 35
    I know Sooo many guiy's that love the chunck! so them skinny minni's need to save face


    Some of us skinny mini's have the whole package..:) I know a bunch of men who love heavier women and I know a bunch of men who love a woman with curves and a tight *kitten*!
  • secrets_out
    secrets_out Posts: 684 Member
    Thank you thank you thank you!!! And my mantra right now is....thank God I gotta cute face to distract from my ( overweight, unattractive, unhealthy,NOT CURVY, or in denial ) waist .....but I got great boobs!
  • servilia
    servilia Posts: 3,452 Member
    Since when did curvy become obese?


    I know! I consider myself curvy. I always have, I am 120 at 5'4, small waist big hips/thicker thigh, my measurements are 33/34-24-35, to me thats curvy. But now 300-400 pound people call themselves curvy & I think thats weird.. It's not curvy if you can't tell where someone's waist is or if they don't have a hourglass shape.. I think curvy is now a nice way of saying 'fat' or maybe it makes overweight women feel better, I don't know. But people on this site treat 'skinny' people kinda crappy because if your 'skinny' your not supposed to have any complaints about your body or want to improve it. I can't refer to myself as curvy on here apparently. I'm not being a jerk or anything, I just see the 'curvy' debate brought up a lot and thats just how I feel, other people have different ideas of what curvy is, and thats okay. c:

    I honestly agree with this. This site has made me dislike the word "curvy" for that exact reason.
    SO sick of "skinny" women being put down and fat acceptance increasing.
    You can see my hip bones when I stand very clearly, my collar bone, all the little tendons in my feet and hands, and can count my ribs when I do yoga. Damn I am so unattractive since im not "curvy"

    I know! I'm pretty nasty myself I guess :(
  • Elizabeth_C34
    Elizabeth_C34 Posts: 6,376 Member
    I have not noticed a single 'hater' now that I changed my attitude. Y'all be hatin' now.

    It's amazing how far a change in attitude takes you in life :flowerforyou:
  • LaMujerMasBonitaDelMundo
    LaMujerMasBonitaDelMundo Posts: 3,634 Member
    Stop acting like the entire ****ing world is putting you down or putting you on a pedestal. I've had severe social anxiety where in the back of my head I've thought the same thing, but when I'm being RATIONAL I know that's not true. The talk about "haters" is done either in meme culture or to try and sound cool (however it ends up sounding ghetto as ****). Nobody is actually "hating" on you.

    No offense, but BS. If you're fat, people are "hating on you" everywhere you go.

    True especially if you live in an Asian country where people in general are very obssessed with being stick thin. They even consider their own people fat even though they look stick thin & only weigh about < 45kgs or <100 lbs. I live in an Asian country & when I was fat, I always get unpleasant comments from the people here. Now even if I already lost a lot of weight, I'm still considered one of the "heaviest" women in my work at only 53kgs/118lbs.
  • grpeaches
    grpeaches Posts: 5
    YOU GO, GIRL!!!!!
  • paulagabay
    paulagabay Posts: 96
    well said everyone. I especially agree that MFP needs a like button.
  • bluberrygoo
    bluberrygoo Posts: 222 Member
    Makes me wonder why anybody is on MFP really, if everybody loves the way they are now.

    That's what I was thinking. It would be nice if everybody actually did love and accept their bodies.
  • jcstanton
    jcstanton Posts: 1,849 Member
    Yes, we're all beautiful, intelligent people on the inside as the original poster suggested, but that doesn't do us a bit of good if we're dead of a heart attack, or diabetes, or some other weight-related malady at a ridiculously young age.

    I suppose that makes me a "hater"...I don't intend to be, but such is life I guess. :)

    Agree with this !!

    I don't think she was saying there aren't any consequences to staying at an unhealthy weight as long as you're happy that way. I think the point she was trying to make was that, the line, "you have such a pretty/cute face" is like the line, "you're a nice girl, but you're just not my type". There are implications in those lines...hurtful implications. "You have a cute face, but that doesn't matter because you're fat." "You're a nice girl, but you don't look good enough for me." When you've heard that for years on end, you get tired of hearing it. But, then, I wouldn't expect someone who's probably never had a serious weight problem to understand.
  • seansquared
    seansquared Posts: 328 Member
    I was athletic and around 170 all through high school and then college. At my heaviest then, and it was muscle, I was around 195. I looked frigging fantastic, not all chopped up like a fitness model (which is what I am shooting for long-term... the look not the profession!) but solid chest\back\arms\thighs\abs\big calves etc.

    Then a job caught up. Then two full-time IT jobs. Then doing side businesses. Going out all the time with friends or with vendors. Life's ups and downs. I got up to 270 and probably 35% bodyfat, so about 100lbs higher than my "dry" weight, and 70lbs or so higher than ideal (if around 8% bf).

    I still went on dates and had plenty of good times in that regard. I still excelled in my career. My friends still loved me. I still loved myself.

    In the back of my head was a nagging little voice, though, telling me, "Sure, you're still a good looking guy, but you could be mega-****ing-hot, so put the goddamn cheeseburgers down and get back to work".

    I lost 70lbs in 9 months. And you know what? **** being obese. I don't look at old pics of myself and JUDGE myself because I was fat, because JUDGEMENT implies that I would be thinking things like "Man I was so stupid (because I was so fat)", or "Man I was so ugly (because of being fat)".

    Nobody is JUDGING you by saying you have a cute face but also adding that they are not attracted to your body.Calling someone fat isn't judgement, it's just observation. Judgement comes when someone says you must be a terrible person or have terrible willpower because you're fat.



    So you know what? **** it. I'm fat. I'm smart, I'm well-educated, I have a great job and make a very healthy income, "I've got a cute face" and a great smile. But on top of that, I'm fat. I'm not judging myself, I am just stating a fact. I. Am. Fat. That isn't harmful or hurtful at this point (and hasn't been for a long time) because I know it just means I have eaten more than my maintenance needs and must instead eat less than maintenance to lose weight and get back to a healthy weight and size.

    Now, if you want to say I suck at life because of this, that's you judging me.

    On the other hand, if you want to say yeap, you're fat, that's not judging me, it's just stating a fact.



    Phew. Long-winded story short, you're fat. Nobody is judging you for being fat. And you do have a cute face. And none of that says anything about your personality, brains, ambition, or anything else. It's just a simple fact. An athlete is ripped or cut or in great shape. Doesn't mean they are smart, stupid, rich, poor, or anything in-between. It's just a simple fact.

    Be confident. Nobody can take that away from you. But don't accuse others of something they aren't doing. And to those who are actually, really judging you by the definition of the word? Take those people to task, and ask them how in the world they equate being fat with being stupid, or being fat with lacking control. For most people, it's about erasing years or decades of misinformation and bad eating habits. I have more self-control than 99% of the people I know in life, and nobody says otherwise just because I'm fat. I just didn't apply that willpower to my body.

    And now I am.
  • Hanablu2
    Hanablu2 Posts: 134 Member
    Not to bust your bubble, but if we're on MFP we're conscious about our weight for whatever reason it may be. Also, there is a difference between being fat, curvy, and fat with curves. I am fat. I am not curvy.I have a ruler shape. And I ****ing hate when women who fat are say they are curvy. Being fat is not curvy. Jennifer Hudson was curvy and overweight. Now she's just curvy.

    I'm getting a "being overweight is a good thing that we should embrace" vibe. I'm here because I want to lose weight for my health, physical and emotional.

    For a very short list of women who I consider "thick" and curvy:

    Kim Kardashian
    Jennifer Hudson

    *edit I missed a comma.

    I understand the poster's point of self confidence which is great we all need that. I also know a curve is a curve and a lump is a lump. I have curves to my lower body and unattractive lumps in my upper so that is why I am here working on that.
    Jennifer Hudson since WW and Kim Kardashian are not thick and curvy they are curvy but hardly thick at a size what 6 and 4 respectively. Kim as a big ole butt small everywhere else. A true thick and curvy woman is Mad Men's Christina Hendricks! She is thick with lots of true curves.
  • lookinggood53
    lookinggood53 Posts: 5
    It's about getting healthy. It's gr8 that u r confident in your body, but u need to have a healthy body to enjoy what life has to offer.
  • Nopedotjpeg
    Nopedotjpeg Posts: 1,805 Member
    Yes, we're all beautiful, intelligent people on the inside as the original poster suggested, but that doesn't do us a bit of good if we're dead of a heart attack, or diabetes, or some other weight-related malady at a ridiculously young age.

    I suppose that makes me a "hater"...I don't intend to be, but such is life I guess. :)

    Agree with this !!

    I don't think she was saying there aren't any consequences to staying at an unhealthy weight as long as you're happy that way. I think the point she was trying to make was that, the line, "you have such a pretty/cute face" is like the line, "you're a nice girl, but you're just not my type". There are implications in those lines...hurtful implications. "You have a cute face, but that doesn't matter because you're fat." "You're a nice girl, but you don't look good enough for me." When you've heard that for years on end, you get tired of hearing it. But, then, I wouldn't expect someone who's probably never had a serious weight problem to understand.

    Then take it from someone who has had a serious weight problem. Somebody saying "you're not my type" or "you have a cute face" isn't an insult. I was insulted throughout school about my weight, and many other times outside of it. It sucks, and it also sucks how we beat ourselves up about our weight, but the perceived notion that the world is against us because of it is incredibly unhealthy.
  • greasygriddle_wechnage
    greasygriddle_wechnage Posts: 246 Member
    this could possibly be one of the dumbest threads i have yet to read...
  • sjwhite7
    sjwhite7 Posts: 86 Member
    Stop acting like the entire ****ing world is putting you down or putting you on a pedestal. I've had severe social anxiety where in the back of my head I've thought the same thing, but when I'm being RATIONAL I know that's not true. The talk about "haters" is done either in meme culture or to try and sound cool (however it ends up sounding ghetto as ****). Nobody is actually "hating" on you.

    HELL ****ING YEAH!

    I used to think people were hating on me and my fatness all the time. I'd just be minding my own business at Golden Corral with my giant *kitten* plate of friend food and chocolate and these skinny haters would look at me and whisper to each other about me! HATERS!!!

    Yeah... no. It was the fact that I was cramming food in my face hole.

    Yesterday I was running (yes, actually running) up a pretty steep hill and about ready to die with my fatness and not-able-to-breathe-ness... some really cute guy drove by and gave me a thumbs up! I blushed and ran home to tell my husband.

    I have not noticed a single 'hater' now that I changed my attitude. Y'all be hatin' now.



    LMAO!!!! Im crying Im laughing so hard!
    I used to think people were hating on me because every time I walked into a room people would turn and stare at me. Then i realized that they were distracted by the noise my thighs were making as I walked into the room.

    I just want to be healthy. I want to get down to about 145-150 lbs and be toned. I don't want to be my suggested size. I want to be able to define what I should or should not look like. I have been skinny and people called me emaciated. I played professional softball and I was muscular. I had a 6 pack and nice toned legs and defined arms but people who were bigger said that I was too small. I wasn't, they were just jealous.. I am now 174lbs and people say I need to lose weight. So you see, people are going to hate no matter what size you are. Be happy with yourself and have the determination to make yourself the way you want to be. Don't conform to peoples opinions. Do what you do FOR yourself because you will be doing it BY yourself. You be the master of your own life and forget about what other people say. The only opinion that matters when it comes to you is YOURS!
  • TheBraveryLover
    TheBraveryLover Posts: 1,217 Member
    I love people who are sitting here defining what it means to be curvy and who gets to call themselves that. So many sentient dictionaries on this site.

    People be happy with themselves if they want. They can call themselves curvy or thick or BBW. They can feel beautiful. It's really not your place to decide they can't. Don't like their body type? Don't have sex with them, don't have that body type yourself. You cannot, and should not attempt to, control how other people view their own body. Fat or Thin. If someone is on this site they are very likely here to get healthy. That doesn't always mean skinny. And if they want to lose weight but already have self esteem? Good for them.

    I agree.
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