The "Sissifying" of America...
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Being a Scout leader. and not believing the hype.What are people doing to De-Sissifying America?0 -
What's the point of winning if everybody gets one of these.
I'm seriously starting to think that you people don't understand the psychology of developing brains.
From which psychological theory of development are you stating this?
Even psychoanalytic, psychosocial, humanistic, and cognitive theories assess development based on overall experiences and the ability to cope with failure.
...it's a bit of a stretch to say that for cognitive psychology.0 -
Winning isn't everything, having fun is. My parents were like you, and they did me NO favors. The constant pressure to WIN WIN WIN, to "stand out", to "be amazing". Let kids be kids. They are already competitive in their own ways. First let them learn empathy, compassion, fairness, and when they are older they can learn the WIN WIN WIN thing. Right now, some kids are being taught the importance of empathy, compassion, fairness; but they become victims of bullies who are being taught pure competitiveness. Some of those who are being taught pure competitiveness will snap under the pressure.
It's not about a "sissifying" of the USA, but about simply letting kids enjoy their childhood. It's too short. Let them enjoy that innocent time fully, without any adult screw-ups being pushed onto them.
**in before anyone tries to snark me with that, "I hope you don't have any kids!" --- I don't. I can't have kids. Add to it, disabled people aren't allowed to adopt where I live, and voilà, none for me. I do, however, help take care of my nieces and nephews. They aren't "sissies", to use a misogynistic term, but polite, compassionate, intelligent little humans. They are competitive when they game/play, but not at the cost of harming others. They obviously are in for a challenge in an Idiocracy style world, but they'll have it made if they manage to avoid those types of people.0 -
If you have kids as I do, buck the trend.
Teach your kids about life earlier, like when I was raised. It's mean, it sucks, the world is out to get you. Apply yourself to achieve excellence. You may not hit Excellence, but anything less than 100% is bull$hit. And it is not acceptable to stop there. Always search to improve yourself.
I have done rather well with this...My 15 year old daughter wants to grow up with the knowledge of a doctor, with the abilities of an assassin. God I love her for that.0 -
The 13 year old is in Junior High/Middle School correct? And you're saying they don't give out F's in JH/MS?
How old are your kids?In my kids schools they don't give students "F's" anymore they get "U" for unsatisfactory. I guess because the word fail is too harsh for the kids. Bull crap...you FAILED. Do better.
They are 11 and 13.
In grade school around here you get a grade of 1-4, with 3 meeting the standard, 4 above standard, and 2 below standard etc. Only when they get to JH/MS do they get "real" grades. It's been like this for a long time. It's nothing new. When I was in grade school 30 years ago we got S or U, for satisfactory or unsatisfactory and real grades didn's start until 7th grade.0 -
I think the only real solution is... "Thunderdome!"
2 kids enter.. 1 kid leaves....
Sooooo ... you read Hunger Games as nonfiction, then?
There was a Thunderdome in Hunger Games?0 -
Again, it's not the same as it was before. The internet has turned kids *nasty*. Downright disgusting.
Like I said. Kids are vicious. Now instead of getting the **** beaten out of you and your glasses snapped in half, you get slammed on the internet. Either way, you're getting a beat down whether it be physical or emotional.
This is a prime example of parents not being parents and instead being friends. Be strict. HELL, my mom used to whoop me with a wooden spoon when I didn't do what she asked. I didn't even know the damn things were used for cooking until I was 10! My mom was never my best friend when I was growing up. She was a disciplinarian and that part of her still comes out even though I've grown up.
Now my friends are having kids and saying "You go do what your little heart desires" and their kids are total pansies.
... and you have grown up with stunted empathetic development, this point made obvious by the fact you equate one experience with another before imaging what it feels like. When you lack empathy, you are genuinely not a nice person because you don't know how to feel for other people's pain. You cannot rationalize a kid getting his glasses broken with a shy kid being inundated with messages encouraging him to kill himself, that he is a worthless piece of crap and nobody will ever love him, especially during the period in American adolescent development where one psychologically starts to distance themselves from their parents and seek a collective identity with their peers.
It is not the same.
When a kid got their *kitten* kicked it was a generalized attack, hurtful and detrimental in itself, but still not the individual, nit-picky, unbelievably descriptive and disgustingly creative thing bullying is today. If you got beat up our teased in class at least you could commiserate with someone in person sometimes, because you could be readily aware of what was going on, and someone might occasionally stand up for you. If you're getting anonymous mortifying messages online it's not something you share with anyone, or others witness, or that you can rationalize. Some kids are more sensitive in this generation but you are more or less a heartless monster for assuming the kids that kill themselves for being bullied should be faulted, or that their parents should be faulted for not "toughening them up".
You clearly have not developed into the individual you thought you were, because from my perspective, if you *really* believe what you are saying in this regard, you immediately come off as a nasty person.0 -
Complaining about it and claiming it's only other people that are doing it. It's the American way.What are people doing to De-Sissifying America?0 -
As a kid that was bullied and survived, you are correct and wise beyond your years. I congratulate you and your parents.Again, it's not the same as it was before. The internet has turned kids *nasty*. Downright disgusting.
Like I said. Kids are vicious. Now instead of getting the **** beaten out of you and your glasses snapped in half, you get slammed on the internet. Either way, you're getting a beat down whether it be physical or emotional.
This is a prime example of parents not being parents and instead being friends. Be strict. HELL, my mom used to whoop me with a wooden spoon when I didn't do what she asked. I didn't even know the damn things were used for cooking until I was 10! My mom was never my best friend when I was growing up. She was a disciplinarian and that part of her still comes out even though I've grown up.
Now my friends are having kids and saying "You go do what your little heart desires" and their kids are total pansies.
... and you have grown up with stunted empathetic development because you equate one experience with another before imaging what it feels like. You cannot rationalize a kid getting his glasses broken with a shy kid being inundated with messages encouraging them to kill themselves. It is not the same. Some kids are more sensitive in this generation but you are more or less a heartless monster for assuming the kids that kill themselves for being bullied should be faulted, or that their parents should be faulted for not "toughening them up".
You clearly have not developed into the individual you thought you were, because from my perspective, if you *really* believe what you are saying in this regard, you immediately come off as a nasty person.
I didn't kill myself over being bullied. However that doesn't mean I'm somehow better than those that have or that we should use bullying as a form of weeding out the herd. What you said needed to be said.0 -
Winning isn't everything, having fun is. My parents were like you, and they did me NO favors. The constant pressure to WIN WIN WIN, to "stand out", to "be amazing". Let kids be kids. They are already competitive in their own ways. First let them learn empathy, compassion, fairness, and when they are older they can learn the WIN WIN WIN thing. Right now, some kids are being taught the importance of empathy, compassion, fairness; but they become victims of bullies who are being taught pure competitiveness. Some of those who are being taught pure competitiveness will snap under the pressure.
It's not about a "sissifying" of the USA, but about simply letting kids enjoy their childhood. It's too short. Let them enjoy that innocent time fully, without any adult screw-ups being pushed onto them.
**in before anyone tries to snark me with that, "I hope you don't have any kids!" --- I don't. I can't have kids. Add to it, disabled people aren't allowed to adopt where I live, and voilà, none for me. I do, however, help take care of my nieces and nephews. They aren't "sissies", to use a misogynistic term, but polite, compassionate, intelligent little humans. They are competitive when they game/play, but not at the cost of harming others. They obviously are in for a challenge in an Idiocracy style world, but they'll have it made if they manage to avoid those types of people.
Winning at all costs is just as bad as not allowing anyone to fail, and I don't think anyone is advocating that. There has to be a healthy balance.
The book "Free Range Kids" is an excellent book on anti-helicopter parenting. The lady was the one who let her kid ride the subway in NYC by himself and has great insight on the "free range" parenting philosophy. Kids left alone to make their own choices tend to be better adjusted when they reach adult-hood. They don't freak out if they get a flat (there is nothing more embarrassing than having to change a flat tire for another capable male) and they don't shut down during confrontation.
If you study victimology (which I do as a police officer), you tend to notice most victims tend not to be "street smart" because they've never been allowed to roam the streets. I say let your kids get into fights when they're young, so if they're attacked on the they don't shut down. I say let your kid fall down and get hurt, that way they experience pain and don't shut down in a crisis situation. Let your kid fail and go to summer school, so they realize there are negative consequences to negative actions (or inactions). Let your kid take the game winning shot, and miss, so they can learn to recover from heartbreak. Don't let your kid receive an award just for showing up, because they'll start believing they're entitled to one when they grow up. If you do these things, and help guide them through these situations, you will raise a self-sufficient and independent adult.0 -
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
Complaining about it and claiming it's only other people that are doing it. It's the American way.What are people doing to De-Sissifying America?0 -
As a kid that was bullied and survived, you are correct and wise beyond your years. I congratulate you and your parents.Again, it's not the same as it was before. The internet has turned kids *nasty*. Downright disgusting.
Like I said. Kids are vicious. Now instead of getting the **** beaten out of you and your glasses snapped in half, you get slammed on the internet. Either way, you're getting a beat down whether it be physical or emotional.
This is a prime example of parents not being parents and instead being friends. Be strict. HELL, my mom used to whoop me with a wooden spoon when I didn't do what she asked. I didn't even know the damn things were used for cooking until I was 10! My mom was never my best friend when I was growing up. She was a disciplinarian and that part of her still comes out even though I've grown up.
Now my friends are having kids and saying "You go do what your little heart desires" and their kids are total pansies.
... and you have grown up with stunted empathetic development because you equate one experience with another before imaging what it feels like. You cannot rationalize a kid getting his glasses broken with a shy kid being inundated with messages encouraging them to kill themselves. It is not the same. Some kids are more sensitive in this generation but you are more or less a heartless monster for assuming the kids that kill themselves for being bullied should be faulted, or that their parents should be faulted for not "toughening them up".
You clearly have not developed into the individual you thought you were, because from my perspective, if you *really* believe what you are saying in this regard, you immediately come off as a nasty person.
I didn't kill myself over being bullied. However that doesn't mean I'm somehow better than those that have or that we should use bullying as a form of weeding out the herd. What you said needed to be said.
I'm sorry for what you experienced. Thank you for defending me.0 -
As a substitute teacher.. i can tell you how bad some of the kids are now a days... If someone doesn't get a turn to do something, they cry (and im talking about 10-11 year olds!). If something doesn't go just right.. more criing.. these kids are going to have a rude awakening when they head up to the middle school next year. and i find an issue with the fact that most schools spend time rewarding the "sporty" kids (at least around here) and the kids who do well scholastically do not even get acknoleged. (In 5 grade.. my son had straight "A's, and perfect attendance.. ) really hard to do.. should have been worth at least a cudos! im glad the charter school gives awards to kids who do well scolastically..
anyways.. i had to yell at my music class today (made for a bit of a cranky day).. because these kids could not even sit in a chair or listen to simple instructions.
ugh.. (frustrated sub today!)0 -
this is not just about kids - ITS ABOUT THE FUTURE OF AMERICA - there are those who want to make everyone weak so they maintian power over all., - wake up people!
^^^^^THIS x1000000000
If you keep the "regular" people docile and complacent and give them praise they'll never question why you are constantly f**cking them in other ways. It's typical liberalism run amok. The elite will still have what they want AND have power over everyone else. You don't want anyone striving to be better and have more when everyone has to have the same things....
Like in Communist Russia: If Igor gets paid the same to build 1 radio a day as he does to build 10, why in the F would he build 10? Same thing is happening in America now. If I don't HAVE to work and be good at a profession and still get paid and get healthcare, why in the F would I work at all?!?!?! That's the mentality that anyone buying into this *kitten* is fostering.0 -
The 13 year old is in Junior High/Middle School correct? And you're saying they don't give out F's in JH/MS?
How old are your kids?In my kids schools they don't give students "F's" anymore they get "U" for unsatisfactory. I guess because the word fail is too harsh for the kids. Bull crap...you FAILED. Do better.
They are 11 and 13.
In grade school around here you get a grade of 1-4, with 3 meeting the standard, 4 above standard, and 2 below standard etc. Only when they get to JH/MS do they get "real" grades. It's been like this for a long time. It's nothing new. When I was in grade school 30 years ago we got S or U, for satisfactory or unsatisfactory and real grades didn's start until 7th grade.
Nope. My kids got real grades in elementary after 3rd grade. They also get O's, S's, and U's for things like conduct, participation etc. But their classes they get real grades A,B,C,D, and U. And my daughter in 7th, they still get U if they fail a paper, course, etc. no F's.0 -
i disagree.
and my kid is awesome.
the only way you become a winner is to not let the failures beat you down and keep trying. What is the saying? Edison didn't fail 500 times, he found 500 ways to not make a lightbulb work.
And had he been sufficiently rewarded for those 500 failures, he might never have found the need to go on to find the one success.
BS. What you guys are talking about is about giving kids posivibes even when they don't win like it's some crime against humanity. My son always gets told he did good even when he fails because i'm not gonna emotionally abuse him for not being the best at everything. Trying, and continuing to try, is what matters.
I think you might be missing the point a little. Being told you're a failure is much different than being allowed to fail.
Right...I 'm not saying to tell kids they are a failure. I'm only saying that you need to learn to benefit from your losses.0 -
Weird. It must be all that rampant liberalism out there in Kentucky. Here in the conservative Seattle area, we still have regular grades and they give kids no quarter. Their homework loads are huge and a lot is required of them. My 15-year old son is on two baseball teams, the HS team and a Pony team. Both teams keep score and bench players that aren't any good. You also have to try out for both teams and most don't make it. I'm sure glad I don't live in one of those liberal areas of the country.
The 13 year old is in Junior High/Middle School correct? And you're saying they don't give out F's in JH/MS?
How old are your kids?In my kids schools they don't give students "F's" anymore they get "U" for unsatisfactory. I guess because the word fail is too harsh for the kids. Bull crap...you FAILED. Do better.
They are 11 and 13.
In grade school around here you get a grade of 1-4, with 3 meeting the standard, 4 above standard, and 2 below standard etc. Only when they get to JH/MS do they get "real" grades. It's been like this for a long time. It's nothing new. When I was in grade school 30 years ago we got S or U, for satisfactory or unsatisfactory and real grades didn's start until 7th grade.
Nope. My kids got real grades in elementary after 3rd grade. They also get O's, S's, and U's for things like conduct, participation etc. But their classes they get real grades A,B,C,D, and U. And my daughter in 7th, they still get U if they fail a paper, course, etc. no F's.0 -
The 13 year old is in Junior High/Middle School correct? And you're saying they don't give out F's in JH/MS?
How old are your kids?In my kids schools they don't give students "F's" anymore they get "U" for unsatisfactory. I guess because the word fail is too harsh for the kids. Bull crap...you FAILED. Do better.
They are 11 and 13.
In grade school around here you get a grade of 1-4, with 3 meeting the standard, 4 above standard, and 2 below standard etc. Only when they get to JH/MS do they get "real" grades. It's been like this for a long time. It's nothing new. When I was in grade school 30 years ago we got S or U, for satisfactory or unsatisfactory and real grades didn's start until 7th grade.
Nope. My kids got real grades in elementary after 3rd grade. They also get O's, S's, and U's for things like conduct, participation etc. But their classes they get real grades A,B,C,D, and U. And my daughter in 7th, they still get U if they fail a paper, course, etc. no F's.
so.. do they pass them to the next grade with "u"? i have seen many kids passed on to the next grade with F's sad.. the charter school here only passes kids to the next grade if they get above a 70 in all thier classes.. anything below a 70 and they have mandatory afterschool help. (which works for me!)0 -
Weird. It must be all that rampant liberalism out there in Kentucky. Here in the conservative Seattle area, we still have regular grades and they give kids no quarter. Their homework loads are huge and a lot is required of them. My 15-year old son is on two baseball teams, the HS team and a Pony team. Both teams keep score and bench players that aren't any good. You also have to try out for both teams and most don't make it. I'm sure glad I don't live in one of those liberal areas of the country.
The 13 year old is in Junior High/Middle School correct? And you're saying they don't give out F's in JH/MS?
How old are your kids?In my kids schools they don't give students "F's" anymore they get "U" for unsatisfactory. I guess because the word fail is too harsh for the kids. Bull crap...you FAILED. Do better.
They are 11 and 13.
In grade school around here you get a grade of 1-4, with 3 meeting the standard, 4 above standard, and 2 below standard etc. Only when they get to JH/MS do they get "real" grades. It's been like this for a long time. It's nothing new. When I was in grade school 30 years ago we got S or U, for satisfactory or unsatisfactory and real grades didn's start until 7th grade.
Nope. My kids got real grades in elementary after 3rd grade. They also get O's, S's, and U's for things like conduct, participation etc. But their classes they get real grades A,B,C,D, and U. And my daughter in 7th, they still get U if they fail a paper, course, etc. no F's.
I hope you're being sarcastic here...Seattle is a hotbed of liberal nonsense and gets worse every single day. I'm a native and live here and see the constant dumbing down of education and the forced pussification of your average citizen.0 -
I'm being sarcastic. Of course Seattle is liberal. That's why I love living here. If was conservative, I'd probably move to Texas or some other red state. Our school system here in the suburbs is very good and rigorous. We also keep score at our sports games at the appropriate level. That's my point. It has nothing to do with "liberalism".
Weird. It must be all that rampant liberalism out there in Kentucky. Here in the conservative Seattle area, we still have regular grades and they give kids no quarter. Their homework loads are huge and a lot is required of them. My 15-year old son is on two baseball teams, the HS team and a Pony team. Both teams keep score and bench players that aren't any good. You also have to try out for both teams and most don't make it. I'm sure glad I don't live in one of those liberal areas of the country.
The 13 year old is in Junior High/Middle School correct? And you're saying they don't give out F's in JH/MS?
How old are your kids?In my kids schools they don't give students "F's" anymore they get "U" for unsatisfactory. I guess because the word fail is too harsh for the kids. Bull crap...you FAILED. Do better.
They are 11 and 13.
In grade school around here you get a grade of 1-4, with 3 meeting the standard, 4 above standard, and 2 below standard etc. Only when they get to JH/MS do they get "real" grades. It's been like this for a long time. It's nothing new. When I was in grade school 30 years ago we got S or U, for satisfactory or unsatisfactory and real grades didn's start until 7th grade.
Nope. My kids got real grades in elementary after 3rd grade. They also get O's, S's, and U's for things like conduct, participation etc. But their classes they get real grades A,B,C,D, and U. And my daughter in 7th, they still get U if they fail a paper, course, etc. no F's.
I hope you're being sarcastic here...Seattle is a hotbed of liberal nonsense and gets worse every single day. I'm a native and live here and see the constant dumbing down of education and the forced pussification of your average citizen.0
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