Significant other not going to work/school when they say the

Immediately go and get tested for STD's...

Talk to them.

Ask why they felt the need to lie about it in the first place. It could be something really messed up, or it could be something like this:

When my bf and I started dating he worked for a cable company. I knew he didn't really like his job, but it was a job, and this was right around the time everybody everywhere was starting to get laid off, he was thankful he had a job.

A few months go by and he tells me they've started laying people off at his company, but as far as he knew his job was safe (he's a really hard worker no matter what the job). Well one day I got off work pretty early and noticed his car was at my place (we didn't live together, but he stayed at my place a lot...he had 3 roommates lol). When I came inside he told me that he had been laid off the Friday before (this was on a Thursday) and every day that week he'd gotten up and gone out job hunting and he was just so ashamed he'd lost his job he didn't know how to tell me. That was the 100% truth of the matter. I was upset he hadn't told me right off the bat and had mislead me, but I understood the situation.

Just giving a little personal story to say that it's not always what you think. Then again, it could be exactly what you think, them doing something shady. I say confront them, get to the bottom of it.

Is it a regular thing or a one off? I'd see if it's happening consistently before I jumped to any conclusions. There have been times i've told my SO i'm doing something but then my plans have changed. Perhaps they have a doc apt they didn't want to talk about, perhaps it was a freak occurrence. I'd def get my facts straight before confronting them

Good point. If it's like one time there could be a totally normal explanation, but if it's a habit, then I'd worry.

This is where I would go all P.I. on them confirm what I can then confront then take it from there.

I used to lie about going to class because I wanted to sleep in, and didn't want to seem lazy lol

"I'd rather be a lazy liar instead" :yawn:

Yep! I was a "lazy, lying, stoner" when I was 19. It was fun, but not a sustainable lifestyle.

Now I'm 22 and almost finished with my 2nd degree, and in the healthiest relationship of my life

If you have a gut feeling that he/she is cheating, then find out on your own what's going on so you have the information you need when you talk about it. If you have a strong relationship and have no other reasons for suspicion, just ask.

I'd cut them loose.

Dishonesty is the worst thing that can happen to a relationship.

My wife doesn't report to me and doesn't need my permision for anything and that goes both ways, but neither of us lies to the other for any reason.

Talk to them and find out what's really happening. Maybe there's some reasonable explanation. Or maybe they're having trouble and afraid/embarrassed to ask for help. Sometimes people do things like this when they are suffering with depression and don't feel up to dealing with it.

Mine DID do this once. He was supposed to be going to serve his community service, I went up to the animal shelter at lunch and they said he was not there. I was furious. I drove by his mom's house, and his truck was there. I knocked, told him mom what was going on, and went in and woke him up. Just told him I thought that since he was working SO HARD, I should bring him some lunch...... and that he better enjoy it, because it is much better than the food he would soon be eating in jail. He was REALLY embarrassed.

I would get really suspicious! Maybe get a bright spotlight and give'em the third degree. I can make you taaaalk.:huh: :huh:

Just talk to them that is all you can do.

I'm going to go a different direction than anybody else so far... Sometimes I tell my wife I'm going to work and I will get up, shower, dress, and leave like I'm going to work. I go to Starbucks and get a cup of coffee and wait for her to go to work. Then I go back to the house and work on projects that I need to get done around the house. If I tell her I'm taking the day off, some of her projects will get put on my to-do list. Another time I did this, I stayed home and put up all of the Christmas decorations on the outside of the hosue for my wife. I always tell my wife when she gets home what I've done. She just HATES me using my vacation for house projects. I'd rather ask for forgiveness than permission. It sounds like you have the need for a sit down talk...!!!

This... I find that if people know I'm home from work, my day never ends up being MY day. Sometimes a person just wants a day to themsevles.

That being said, I would definitely just ask them.

Follow them and find out where they are going and what they are doing. If its bad then I'd confront them.

I kicked him out. My oldest son's dad was doing this for a few months. It was the straw that broke the camel's back. I kicked him out and ended our relationship. I couldn't support him and my son.