ladies is he being a jerk or gentleman???

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  • doorki
    doorki Posts: 2,611 Member
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    I am always amazed by the amount of women that are so willing to end relationships over a misspoken statement.
  • Eyerin
    Eyerin Posts: 24
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    The Ex is an Ex for a reason. Why should he care, other than to boost his ego?
  • Pankakefacebetch
    Pankakefacebetch Posts: 108
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    I think the way you put this sounds rude and I would be super angry if my husband said this to me. It would be better if you aid hey hun my ex is going to be there and i just wanted to give you the heads up. Trust me being a woman your girlfriend will take it upon herself to try and look as good as possible to show up your ex. I know thats what i would do lol.
    Your significant other( someone who you have been dating exclusively for a year) ask you to attend a popular event In your area and he says to you " I really need you looking your best my ex girlfriend always attends this event and I know she is going to be there and I know she is going to be dressed up" would you feel like he is being a jerk or would you feel that is a good heads up cause its not something you would normally get particularly dressed up and made up to attend?????
  • Linbo93
    Linbo93 Posts: 229 Member
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    I would have been offended. He shouldn't care about the ex or her opinion of you. If it were me, and he had asked me if I would dress nice for the event because of another reason, i.e. it's a dress-up-type event or he just loves how I look all dressed up, I would have accepted it without question. But bringing the ex into it? Not cool.
  • Z_I_L_L_A
    Z_I_L_L_A Posts: 2,399 Member
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    So end a relationship over misspoken words or misinterpreted sentence. WOW! As the women say. What jerks to end a relationship over interpretation. Another word they use often"shallow."
  • JDMPWR
    JDMPWR Posts: 1,863 Member
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    I don't know how you would confuse that with gentlemanly. That may be the most insulting thing I've ever read on the internet.
    -wtk

    deff this

    why the bleep would a "man" care about his freakin ex
    that would make me not go ..period

    Because it's a competition.....didn't you read the rules?
  • ashhhhole
    ashhhhole Posts: 74
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    I would be happy for the heads up, but I wouldn't call that being a gentleman.
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
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    I would kinda get excited. Cause I know that means he'd be getting all dressed up too and wants us to look all power couple. Like- let's show everyone what we already know we are and I cant wait to have you on my arm.

    shrug, i like feeling as though someone wouldnt mind showing up with me dressed to the nines in public for a big event.
  • infamousmk
    infamousmk Posts: 6,033 Member
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    Hmmm.... I'd probably honestly appreciate the heads-up. I always like to look good, and if I knew I was going to run in to someone like an ex, I'd want to look my best. Men don't always word things in ways women like, but I think they generally mean well.
  • JanieJack
    JanieJack Posts: 3,831 Member
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    I would kinda get excited. Cause I know that means he'd be getting all dressed up too and wants us to look all power couple. Like- let's show everyone what we already know we are and I cant wait to have you on my arm.

    shrug, i like feeling as though someone wouldnt mind showing up with me dressed to the nines in public for a big event.

    exactly!
  • Z_I_L_L_A
    Z_I_L_L_A Posts: 2,399 Member
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    Hmmm.... I'd probably honestly appreciate the heads-up. I always like to look good, and if I knew I was going to run in to someone like an ex, I'd want to look my best. Men don't always word things in ways women like, but I think they generally mean well.

    ^This
  • 2012asv
    2012asv Posts: 702 Member
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    In my oppinion, I would be thankful for the heads up. If I went to an event that everyone but me was dressed up for I would feel super uncomfortable the entire time... I might even get mad at him for NOT telling me! LOL If you know that he loves you, than he's going to love you no matter what you "wear".

    Sometimes I tell my husband to dress nice... its not because he normally dresses badly- it just means, dress nice.
  • JulieH3art
    JulieH3art Posts: 293 Member
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    It's okay to say the ex is going to be there. It doesnt even have to be with disgust. But if my boyfriend ever told me to "look my best" for his EX's sake, I would probably snap.
  • samandlucysmum
    samandlucysmum Posts: 320
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    I don't know how you would confuse that with gentlemanly. That may be the most insulting thing I've ever read on the internet.
    -wtk
    exactly. that's absolutely rude. I'd get the impression that you were using me to try to impress or get back at the ex... not that you were trying to "give me a heads up."

    ^^^ agree with this^^^
  • SamanthaTheSpartan
    SamanthaTheSpartan Posts: 32
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    The idea behind it isn't so bad, but I would work on the way you approach it. That phrasing is gonna get you a dateless event! If you want help on how to go about it, message me.
  • JustJennie1
    JustJennie1 Posts: 3,843 Member
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    This poor person would be damned if he did and damned if he didn't. I can see it now:

    He tells his GF about the ex and asks her to dress up:

    "What do you mean you want me to dress up because your ex is going to be there? You JERK! You INSENSITIVE SOB! I hate you! It's over!"

    He DOES'T tell his GF about the ex or asks her to dress up:

    "Why the heck didn't you tell me your Ex was going to be here? I would have dressed up! You JERK! You INSENSITIVE SOB! I hate you! It's over!"

    I mean seriously. Either way the dude would be considered a jerk. It's a lose-lose situation for him.
  • HighFistDujek
    HighFistDujek Posts: 2
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    I don't know how you would confuse that with gentlemanly. That may be the most insulting thing I've ever read on the internet.
    -wtk

    you need to surf the internet more.
  • misscristie
    misscristie Posts: 643 Member
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    Poor choice of words. For me, all you would have had to say is "My ex may be there. Hope we don't run into her." I would have a hair appointment, a nail appointment and a new outfit including shoes within half an hour.
  • Z_I_L_L_A
    Z_I_L_L_A Posts: 2,399 Member
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    This poor person would be damned if he did and damned if he didn't. I can see it now:

    He tells his GF about the ex and asks her to dress up:

    "What do you mean you want me to dress up because your ex is going to be there? You JERK! You INSENSITIVE SOB! I hate you! It's over!"

    He DOES'T tell his GF about the ex or asks her to dress up:

    "Why the heck didn't you tell me your Ex was going to be here? I would have dressed up! You JERK! You INSENSITIVE SOB! I hate you! It's over!"

    I mean seriously. Either way the dude would be considered a jerk. It's a lose-lose situation for him.



    ABSOLUTELY THIS^
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
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    I'll get dressed up and go with him if his gf wants to be a *kitten* about it.

    edit: aww man - hate being the carryover thread :(

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