is it "disrespectful" to not have kids?

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  • emstaley4
    emstaley4 Posts: 76 Member
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    Opinions are like elbows....pretty much everyone has one and they aren't going to agree with everyone elses. That is just what they are OPINIONS. Do you know those people? Are they friends of your's? If not consider the source and move on. No one else has to live your life OR live with your choices so if you can put your head on the pillow at night knowing what's right for you then that's all that matters. Judgemental people are a dime a dozen....it's the one's who don't judge that are the rare kind.
  • HiKaren
    HiKaren Posts: 1,306 Member
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    on another website forum, i just got b****ed out for not wanting to have kids. i was really taken aback and i gave my reasons. what i got back was three different people saying i'm horrible for not wanting kids and its very disrespectful to not have kids. they really got mean.

    i dont think i'm "disrespectful" or horrible. my reasons for not wanting kids are well thought out. i dont think anyone should have kids unless they want to. i used to be in child care and i love kids. i think other peoples kids are great. i just know i'm not going to be a good mom and i shouldnt be made to feel bad about that.

    maybe i'm just being sensitive.

    Oh Honey.... No No No, Its not. Who in the world do they think your disrespecting by making YOUR personal choice. They have their heads up their anuses..... Like what kind of site was that anyway. They want you to be like them, and for you to have all the stress they have by having their kids. I think you should only have a kid, if you are ready for the responsiblility, the work, and someone caring to help you. Someone willing to do their share of helping to raise them. Someone who wont leave you for thinner lady after you've had them & gained some weight, and someone willing to watch them while you go jog, and take care of you. Those people sound misrable, and want you to join in their misrable club.

    Dont get me wrong.. Kids are good, if thats what you choose. They shouldn't be condeming you for making YOUR choice. We do have a choice. Different strokes for different folks.
  • keem88
    keem88 Posts: 1,689 Member
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    it's a personal choice.
    my mom says that we are supposed to have children and that it's god's will.
    it's disrespectful to have a child and not care for it. goodness knows there are already too many unfit parents and not enough loving foster homes.

    my child has 4 legs, a tail, and loves me unconditionally forever.

    LOLOL I've been seeking God's will for some time now .... since your mom apparently has a direct line, do you think she could give me a call?

    HAHA
    she is one of THOSE...
    you know she would love to give you a call. i love her to death but she is very overbearing, if it's not my way then it's wrong type of person. she loves her bible for sure.
    it's a shame that people need to be meddling though and try to make others feel bad.
  • Saffyra
    Saffyra Posts: 607 Member
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    I (and my husband) have chosen not to have children.

    I have been told that I'm selfish, that I'm depriving the world of someone who could potentially be president or someone else fabulous, and that it's mean for me not to have kids when other people can't.

    I've also been told that I'll regret it, that my life has no meaning since I don't have children, and I'll be alone when I'm old.

    In the face of all this, its my choice and I know I made/am making the right one.
  • dotmertsky
    dotmertsky Posts: 43
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    In my opinion, they are the ones who are disrespectful to you. What makes their lifestyles the end all and be all of everyones existence? I had someone tell me that there must be something wrong with my marriage because we didn't have any kids. They are all jerks. Maybe people can't have children, maybe hey don't want them.... either way it is none of their business.
  • DonnaRe2012
    DonnaRe2012 Posts: 298 Member
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    They are also the same people who have 9 kids they can't take care of so the rest of us end up paying for them (welfare, food stamps etc).
  • ajohn252
    ajohn252 Posts: 158
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    Totally not disrespectful!!!
    I and my fiancée don`t want children either and the fact that some people have
    the gall to say ANYTHING about another person`s decision is not just disrespectful
    its disgusting. Those people should be embarrassed.
  • sugarnspicere
    sugarnspicere Posts: 45 Member
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    There is no reason what so ever that someone should say such things to you. It is in no way disrespectful. It is a CHOICE EVERYONE has. If you chose to not have kids no one can make you nor should they bash you for it., I am so sorry for what happened to you. My sister doesn't want children. I see nothing wrong with it.
  • cds2001
    cds2001 Posts: 769 Member
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    what's disrespectful is those who have litters that others have to put up with
  • SiouxsieQue
    SiouxsieQue Posts: 85 Member
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    It is absolutely your right to not have kids and no one should ever judge you for it. It was this very site that reminded me of that.
  • thepanttherlady
    thepanttherlady Posts: 258 Member
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    Can I send mine to your house for a little while? Man, I need a break! :D
  • umachanxo
    umachanxo Posts: 926 Member
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    Everyone has their own opinions, I suppose. But, I don't think there's anything wrong with it.
    We have an over population problem, anyway.
  • Kym1610
    Kym1610 Posts: 333 Member
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    Better to be delibratley barren then stupidly fertile

    My husband and I do not have children and do not want children. At the end of the day it's a personal choice. One of the reasons we are not having children is because I don't see the point in having a child that is not 100% wanted!! Good on you for your choice!
  • Bentley2718
    Bentley2718 Posts: 1,690 Member
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    It's not disrespectful to not have kids. It is however, VERY disrespectful, not to mention unkind, and irresponsible to have kids you don't actually want. Children are a huge commitment, the biggest one you'll ever make--it's not something you should do to please others, or feel like you should do to please others.
  • zeikiya989
    zeikiya989 Posts: 80
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    Wow that's the craziest thing I ever heard. How in the heck is one being disrespectful for not wanting kids? And what about people like me who can't have kids? That is someones personal choice it has nothing to do with anyone else. What is disrespectful to this world and people who cant have kids, are parents who are blessed to have them and we hear about all these kids being killed by their own mothers and father.
  • pbajwally
    pbajwally Posts: 210 Member
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    what's disrespectful is those who have litters that others have to put up with

    YES. THIS.

    It burns me to no end that there are so many poor, mistreated, unloved children out there who have "parents" that could care less about them. At the same time there are soooo many people who would give anything to have children & can't. You are not disrespectful. You are INTELLIGENT. Bravo for not being afraid to speak your mind. Don't let the haters get you down.
  • OKfreebird
    OKfreebird Posts: 33 Member
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    I am sorry to hear that happened! No, I don't think that it is disrespectful that you don't want kids. Parenting isn't for everyone. It is a tough job and it takes a lot of responsibility to take care of kids. As well as expensive. Having children is a personal choice. You are not a terrible person for deciding that you don't want children. I think that the people who griped at you for not wanting children are just being ignorant and not only that they are being disrespectful themselves for getting on to you about it. If I were you, I woudn't pay attention to them and not worry about it. Again, I am sorry that happened.
    Rachel
  • hesn92
    hesn92 Posts: 5,967 Member
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    That's one of the most idiotic things I've heard about on this site. No it is not "disrespectful" ... it's laughable that anyone would say that.

    I say you're smart! lol. (I love my kid I really do)
  • mec66901
    mec66901 Posts: 1
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    I have 3 great kids, wanted kids as long as I can remember but it is certainly your right not to want them and doesn't make you a "bad"person. What would be "bad" would be to have kids because it was an expected social norm!
  • ForeverIrish
    ForeverIrish Posts: 232 Member
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    Man, did this hit close to home. I made the decision not to have kids. It was a good one. People often make snarky comments about my choice, or they say, dripping with a 'cutesy' tone, "Oh, you'd be the best Mom ever."

    No, I wouldn't. I like sleeping at night. I like knowing that I'm never going to get a call from an angry teacher, a truant officer, the police, or a member of the clergy about some horrific thing my kid did at school our out in the community. Remember, even Adolf Hitler had a mother. Someone has to give birth to evil geniuses!

    I've been called selfish for not having children. The people that have criticized me for not having kids are the same rude people that touch the pregnant stomachs of women they don't know, I've noticed. I've noticed that the pregnant women don't enjoy that type of thing, either.

    Don't make apologies to anyone for a choice you have the right to make. If they don't like it, tell them to have a Coke and a smile.

    --Just my two cents.

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